Complications - 13. Alternate Ending

this is ch 13 and 14 combined...this is an expanded and alternate ending per suggestions from wonderful readers  thank you all for your helpful feedback!

Chapter Thirteen

Josh walked into Glenn’s room and saw him massaging his legs.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“How was your therapy?”

Glenn winced as he touched his knee. “Brutal. I guess that’s why she calls it pain and torture.”

Both men shared a small laugh. It was refreshing to have a light moment between them for once after the drama they’d gone through.

“Josh…when can I go home?”

“Why? Tired of this spectacular environment already? Or just want to get away from me?”

Glenn fell silent. Josh flipped through the medical file in front of him. Neither said a word for nearly a minute. The tension in the room thickened to a degree beyond cutting it. It was rock solid. His stomach tightened and he could barely meet Glenn’s eyes.

“Josh…”

A meek “I’m sorry.” was all Josh was able to utter without bursting into tears. His heart was in turmoil as his true feelings were finally coming to bear, but would they even be heard or worse, would they even be believed at this point?

”I know you are. You’ve said that over and over.”

“I mean it. Deeply.” Josh pressed, hoping his words would carry some weight. “How do I fix this?”

After an agonizingly long pause, Glenn spoke. “I don’t know. You broke my heart badly, Josh. Shit…I was in shock when you dropped that bomb on me!” he scowled and Josh thought his heart would splinter.

“Glenn, that night my heart about stopped! I was so afraid and upset and worried. My training kicked in, eventually, otherwise, I don't know how I would have made it--seeing you like that, so broken and..."

“Josh….”

“I've known all along that I was in love with you. I’d fallen almost since we met. I've just had such a hard time, letting go of the past. I was so stupid not to see what was right in front of me. I think my life would end if you weren’t with me to love me and support me, listen to me, and just be there, I’ve been dead for this past week without knowing if we’re still meant to be or not….I want us to be as we were.” He laid his head on Glenn’s arm and wept aloud.

“Josh…please. Stop.”

Begrudgingly, the doctor pulled his face back and saw that Glenn’s eyes were just as cold as before.

“You don’t believe me, do you?”

“I don’t know anymore. You’re all over the damn place. I…think we need to stay apart for a while. You must know we can’t be as we were. You destroyed that the night of the accident.”

Silent tears burned down Josh’s face, becoming trapped in his beard. He couldn’t say he was completely in shock, but it still hurt like a bitch. But, to be fair, he had greatly hurt Glenn and knew now wasn’t the best time to do much of anything. He had to let go.

“You’re right.” He whispered.

Glenn cleared his throat. “Josh…”

“No. Please. Here.” He plucked the engagement ring from his hand. “I broke us up, Glenn. I don’t deserve this anymore.”

They both stared at the bauble for a long moment before Glenn shook his head.

“Keep it…until I’m released. Ok?”

Josh simply nodded and put the ring back on his finger.

“When will I be outta here?”

“Ummm…” Josh flipped through the files. “Your PT said another month of therapy, but that can be done outpatient. As your doctor…”

“Please…don’t keep me here any longer.” Glenn begged. “Reassign me if you need to, but please…let me leave. We need to move on.”

Josh didn’t care about the tears that dripped down his cheeks anymore. He sniffed and had to turn away. “I’ll do anything you want.” He made a quick note on the folder and left the room quickly.

Chapter Fourteen

Four weeks passed and Josh felt like he would lose his mind. He put the ring away at home in a special spot and prayed daily that Glenn would forgive him and they could move on together.

As for Glenn, he’d been reassigned to a new doctor who released him two days later. Josh did what he wanted and stayed away. He was back on active duty at his practice; it at least helped keep his mind busy when helping other patients.

Just after closing time, his phone rang. It was Greg.

“Hey, how are you?”

“Better question, how are you?”

Josh shut his eyes and rubbed his head. “Surviving. Helping the living seems to be a good therapy. What’s up?”

“Well, speaking of therapy, I have an idea.”

Call it intuition, but Josh’s stomach tightened at the mention of the word. “What is it?” he ventured.

“Do you want Glenn back?”

Easy question…or was it?

“Of course I do. But he doesn’t…”

“Bullshit. You know how he felt about you.”

“Felt. Past tense. I don’t think he does anymore. Not after what I did…”

“Listen, you want a real chance with him don’t you? You’ve gotten over me, right?”

Had he? He had to think hard; which was easy because that’s all he’d been doing the past month-and-a-half.

“Yes.”

“Then what could it hurt? You’ve done the worst thing already; can’t it only get better from here?”

Damn it hurt to even acknowledge or think about what he’d done. How he wished he could shut off the never ending movie of how horrible that night had been. What was worse was Glenn asking to be reassigned just to be away from him.

“I’m at rock bottom” Josh muttered.

“Then the only way out is to go up. Come on, I’ve got an idea. You gotta listen at least.”

Part of him didn’t want to. His head and heart were in great conflict and he could barely concentrate whenever the topic was his ex-fiance. But finally, after an excessively long pause, which Greg was used to…he responded.

“What is it?”

“Ok, here’s the scoop…”

*

The sun was nearly set as Josh drove over and met Greg at the lot of the outpatient and rehab building on the perimeter of the hospital. His stomach was in knots, but he knew this idea was likely the only way he’d get to see Glenn again.

He got out of his car and spotted his friend who’d parked in the next row over.

“Hey.”

“Hey, bud!” Greg replied

The two hugged briefly.

“Ready?”

Josh swallowed hard. “I guess so. I gotta start somewhere.”

“Come on, I’ve been keeping up. He’s doing great!”

Greg escorted him inside and they went to the lobby of the building; where the physical therapy section was.

Josh felt his nerves tingle, but he had to get a grip. His eyes scoured the area and he finally saw the reason they were there.

In the corner, on a padded table, was Glenn. He looked a little sweaty, but happy. The therapist draped a large ice pack over his knees and patted his shoulder. He smiled and lay back on the bed.

Greg nudged Josh. “That’s our cue.”

With his heart firmly lodged in his throat, Josh followed him. Being physicians, they fit right in, besides…they were on staff and could drop in and see anyone they wanted.

“Glenn?” Greg started the conversation first as he approached the patient.

“Oh hey, Greg. How are you?” his eyes traveled to behind the doctor’s shoulder to see Josh. “Hi.”

Josh smiled in reply. “Hey. How are you?”

“Cold.” Glenn pointed to the ice pack and reached for a blanket.

“Lemme get that for you.” Josh jumped into action and unfolded then draped the blanket over his ex’s body. “Better?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

Greg sat down on the bed. “I’ve seen your notes, you’re making excellent progress.”

“I think they said another week and I’m done.” Glenn touted.

“That’s wonderful. You’re in great shape and a fast healer.” Josh replied. He had no idea what to say right now. His eyes didn’t leave Glenn’s face once.

“Try to be.” The patient replied.

Wow. This was even tougher than he thought. It was an open format room; everyone else was watching them but trying oh so carefully to not watch them at the same time. He saw the therapists and nurses walk by and smirk.

“So…how’s everything? Have you gone back to work?” Josh ventured.

Glenn nodded. “Yeah…part-time. This therapy bit takes a while, plus the doctor hasn’t released me to full duty yet. I’m still using a cane at times.”

It pained Josh to hear that this lively 28-year-old had to use a cane of all things. It was all his fault too. He never should’ve let him leave.

“Canes suck.” Greg injected his humor into the tense scene. “I think Amber would commandeer mine and beat me with it if I didn’t do what the doctors tell me to do.”

“That or your kids.” Josh added.

Glenn met Josh’s eyes for the first time and they didn’t look as cold; but perhaps lukewarm? He started to sit up when Josh joined him on the bed and offered a hand.

“Here. Please?”

With a smile on his lips, Glenn took the hand and sat up. He adjusted the ice pack on his knees.

“Thanks.”

“Anytime.”

“So…what’re you guys doing here? Is it visiting doctor day?” Glenn asked

Greg laughed. “No, not quite. I thought I’d show Josh your progress in person.”

Wow, nice tact buddy.

Picking up from Greg’s jovial tone, Josh nodded. “I’ve…wanted to check on you. See how you are.”

“I’m better.” Glenn answered. “Inside and out.”

That was a hopeful phrase if there ever was one.

“Oh?”

“Greg…could you…?”

“Say no more.” Greg stood and patted Josh on the shoulder briefly. “Good luck.”

“Thanks, man.”

After Greg’s departure, there was a long silence between the two. Their eyes roved each other and Josh stuck close.

“How’s the family?” Glenn asked

“Good. They all say hello. Can you believe it? Ben asked about you. He says ‘hey’.”

A sweet smile formed on Glenn’s bearded face. “Awww. He’s a good kid. Tell him I’m fine and I say ‘hey’ back.”

“We all miss you.”

Wow, that was laying it open; but Josh didn’t want anything held back ever again.

“Josh…”

“Ok, yes. I miss you the most.”

Glenn sighed and took his ex’s large hand firmly. “I’ve missed you guys too. Especially you.”

Josh lit up. “You have?”

“Yes. I’ve been talking with a counselor…she’s been a great help.”

“Really? What’s her name?”

“Keller.”

“Oh yes, I’ve heard of her, but just in passing.”

“She’s helped me to straighten out what I really feel and what I want.”

Josh felt his nerves tingle again. “Really? I’d love to know what that might be. If…” he cut himself off.

If Glenn wanted to stay apart it’d be painful as hell; but not like he hadn’t been in agony since the night of the accident anyway. Could he bear to hear the answers? After all, his father always said to never ask a question unless you’re prepared to hear the answer. He steeled himself for whatever reply Glenn had.

“Healing.” Glenn answered. “From all of this. Both of us.”

What did that mean? Josh wasn’t sure to smile or cry. “I…I don’t understand.”

“Josh…my feelings for you haven’t changed. They’ve toned down a little, but they’re still there. I know you’re capable of love; but you need to heal from your situation with Greg and face your own true self also.”

“I…understand. I think.” Some brilliant doctor. When it came to his own health and life he was clueless.

“Do you? I want to be with you again, Josh…”

There had to be a ‘but’ coming.

“But…”

Ah ha!

“I want us to take things slower this time. See me for who I am and not because I look like Greg or jump into a heavy relationship again.”

Josh nodded, he felt a little better. “You want to be with me again?” he had to be sure he heard that right. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. Very!” Glenn replied as he grasped Josh’s hand tighter. “I love you and I’ve never stopped. You didn’t know what you were saying that night and I know that now. I believe you.”

Happy tears sprang to his eyes. “Y-You do?”

“Yes, I do. Now I need to know your true heart and in counseling we can discover that together.”

Therapy? Was he okay with that?

“I said I’d do anything for you, Glenn. I mean that, with all my heart.”

“Do you love me?”

Josh nodded and wrapped his arms around the man tightly. “I love you with all my heart, Glenn.”

After the joyously long and warm embrace, the two separated. “Just so you know, my folks don’t really know what happened, but they’re gonna know the wedding is postponed.”

That made total sense.

“I understand. I expected it to never happen after what…”

“Shhh. Move on from it, please? If we keep bringing it up we’ll never heal. You’re a doctor, you know if you keep reopening old wounds…”

“They never heal.” Josh agreed.

“But we will. That’s what we both want, right?”

Josh nodded. “Very much! It’s been awful not being able to see you all this time. It was Greg’s idea to come here. But we needed space and I respected your wishes to stay away.”

Glenn moved the ice pack off his knees. “Crap that’s cold.” He laughed. “Josh, don’t stay away anymore. I want you in my life.”

Those were the most beautiful words that Josh had heard since ‘I love you’. He kissed Glenn’s knuckles. “I won’t. I’ll be right here.”

“Right now, want to help me to my car?”

Josh grinned and held Glenn’s hands and assisted him with standing. “We’ll take it slow.” He grabbed the nearby cane and handed it to his companion. Were they boyfriends again? He guessed so, but that could be something they hashed out later.

“Sounds good to me, Dr. Adams.”