Torturous Love : Version 3 - 9. Chapter 9

Tobias traced the first letter of his name with the tip of one finger, and frowned softly. Zai was still in the bathroom, drying his fur and the tufted tip of his tail, but Tobias forgot he was standing in the hallway wearing nothing but a towel around his hips and the very obvious half-healed wounds of Zai’s claws across his chest and back. He held the side of his tongue between his teeth, and sounded out the letters softly as he read his own name. Then there was sinuous symbol he didn’t recognise, and then another three letters which were vaguely familiar, but the word eluded him.

“What does this say?”

Sitka, who Tobias knew had been keeping his jaw firmly shut to avoid being snapped at for staring lustfully at him, stepped forward and examined the words.

“Tobias and Zai. How come you guys get a plaque?”

“Nassau put it there.” Tobias could feel the soft, feathery warmth of the Prince through the carved letters, see his smile and the gentle roll of the storm in his eyes, momentarily unclouded by his ancient pain. “I belong here.”

“Ain’t nobody doubted that for a while now, Tobias.” Sitka said his name very deliberately, because Tobias could feel all of the other things the ram-horned demon wished to call him. Tobias turned to glare at him, and the demon looked exactly as though he’d been caught stealing bread from the communion platter at Sunday service. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s hard living with something you can’t have.”

Tobias blinked, then shook his head, because Sitka’s words had arrived with a blur of images, every single on of them clouded with raw lust, and the knowledge that, at some point, every single demon he lived with had been intimate with the others. Tobias shivered, then growled as Sitka imagined him without his towel.

“Get used to being told ‘no’ Sitka.”

The other demon held up his hands in a supplicating gesture.

“I meant no harm. I’m sorry.”

Tobias knew he was failing to hide his smug smile.

“If you don’t learn to stop thinking like that, I’ll be forced to stop cooking for you.”

“You wouldn’t….”

“I urge you not to try that theory, not if you intend on eating any time soon.”

“Yes Tobias. Sorry Tobias.” Sitka practically bowed himself out of the hallway, and vanished into his room.

Tobias didn’t need to turn around in order to see Zai’s proud smile, but he sighed softly as his lover came up behind him, smoothing his sleek furred hands around his chest.

“That was a thing of beauty, Sweetling. You make me very proud.”

“Have you really had sex with him?”

“Sitka? Oh yes, he can be very accommodating when the mood strikes.” Zai purred against his ear, but Tobias could feel the difference in his words and his thoughts. Zai’s light hearted casualness gave away to a deeper, hot sensation when he thought about Tobias instead. “Every now and then the boys,” he meant Sitka and Shindae, “bring something pretty back from Upstairs, and we have ourselves a little play. Eternity gets lonely without a some fun every now and then.”

But it means nothing. It wasn’t a question, and Zai hugged him hard, knowing he understood, at least a little.

You mean everything. The demon assured him

“I hope you don’t ever expect me to join in one of these ‘fun’ sessions of yours?”

“No, my love.” You would always be welcome, if you wanted. But no one would ask you, least of all me.

“Good. Look, Nassau gave us a present.”

“So he did.” Can I give you one?

“You’re insatiable.” Tobias reached out and stroked his hand down Zai’s long tail, feeling the deep, warm sense of satisfaction which emanated from his lover. “What are you planning?”

“I went Upstairs and brought you something.” Zai pulled him bodily through the newly labelled doorway with a broad smile. “I want to take you to the Palace.”

Tobias frowned, because Zai sounded excited, but his mind was full of stress, misery, and fire. He pushed himself up against the ash furred demon and Zai purred as Tobias explored his mind.

I like having you in here with me.

Hush. You’re making it hard to concentrate.

Tobias felt for the memory Zai was dancing around, reaching without using his hands, trying to capture the thought. Zai had taught him how to do it, almost accidentally, and Tobias enjoyed the feeling of being linked with his lover, even whilst Zai’s hands were exploring his body with soft movements.

A great hall, a room in the Palace no doubt. And Nassau, naked from the waist up, his wings glowing, his skin unmarked, smiled at the man Tobias recognised as Mattias. The Prince looked exactly like a man in love, and plucked a feather from one wing. He laughed breathlessly, brushed the feather over Mattias’s lips, and the broad-shouldered human said something Zai hadn’t heard at the time. Nassau kissed him, their passion obvious to everyone watching, and blew on the feather. And then there was screaming, a tornado of flames with Nassau in the centre, desperately clutching at the man he loved even as Mattias slipped away between his fingers.

Tobias pulled out of his lover’s mind just as the intense pain hit him. He was bleeding, Zai’s claws had reopened his shoulder, and Tobias knew why without asking.

“That was the last time Nassau used his gift, and the only time it ever went wrong. If I take you to the Palace, it’ll be a big deal, and you’ll have to look the part.”

The young man stared at the outfit on the bed.

“What is that?”

“A three piece suit. Height of modern fashion on the world I was on lately. Saw someone wearing one, it looked just the thing considering your dislike of traditional dress.”

For the last time, a loin cloth does not count as clothing.

Zai laughed and licked the blood from his skin.

Don’t tell the boys that, or they’ll start going around naked again. You like it?

“Yes. Thank you Zai.”

“Anything for my Sweetling.”

Tobias kissed the demon, wrapped both arms around his neck, and smiled at the texture of Zai’s purr.

“I have to go cook.”

“Really?”

“Yes. The guys will be hungry soon, and Shindae said he was going to get me some whirring birds. Inai will like it, he can eat them whole.”

“Inai can eat anything whole,” Zai grumbled unhappily. But, we could stay here and I could do really excellent things to you. Again.

Remember what I said about the virtues of waiting? “Anyway, I’m still sore.”

By the time Tobias walked down to the kitchen to find Shindae’s promised gift of a dozen small, blue-grey feathered whirring birds waiting for him, he was no longer sore, but he was hiding his lust in his jeans. As it turned out, there were some very interesting places Zai could use his healing tongue that Tobias hadn’t previously been aware of.

He was stood at the sink, gutting and plucking the birds with quick, well practised movements, thanking the house silently as it disposed of the waste with quiet efficiency, so he wasn’t looking when Kiorl wandered in, and sat heavily at the counter on his favourite stool. There was the clink and scrape of things – bits of armour and weapons – being put down on the surface, and Tobias was about to turn and snap at the panther, when he heard the demon’s voice as clearly as though he’d been speaking.

Well that was a fucking unsatisfying afternoon. The thought was followed with a rush of emotion, and an image which burnt itself into Tobias’s unwilling mind just as the rest of their housemates came spilling through the door. Tobias whirled round, hand over his mouth. But his voice was three steps ahead of his self-control.

“You’ve been having sex with the Devil?!”

Sitka paused in the doorway, hand flung out to catch Shindae's arm.

“You know, I’m suddenly not hungry.”

Tobias stared at Kiorl as he realised what he’d just said, then ducked out of the panther’s line of sight, wishing he could become invisible. Kiorl snarled, a deep, bloodcurdling sound and Tobias knew the demon wanted to hurt him badly. And then Zai was standing over him, tail snapping with righteous anger, daring the panther to challenge him.

“Get out of my way!”

“No.” Zai’s eyes flared like the inside of the sun. “Don’t you dare touch him.”

“Keep a fucking leash on it then, Zai.” Kiorl spat.

Unwise as the action was, Tobias was suddenly on his feet, and flung the little thumb knife he’d been using at the panther. The point stuck into the leather vambrace Kiorl was still wearing, and he roared. Tobias hadn’t realised how quick a creature of Kiorl’s size could be, but the panther who smiled with feline grace moved with it as well, and in a blink he was over the counter, his fist holding Tobias up by the throat as his feet kicked in the air.

“I am a major demon of Hell, and you- you are just a worthless human pet. How dare you challenge me and expect to live?”

“KIORL!” Zai stood, eyes flashing with a mixture of anger and fear, and he grasped Tobias’s hand. The contact was sharp and sweet, and Tobias hoped that Zai could just pull him back into his safe embrace. But Kiorl’s ice blue eyes narrowed and he showed his teeth.

“He has no status here. He is your pet, Zai, and you should have trained him better.”

Kiorl…. The Prince’s voice, smooth, calm, soft, invaded all their minds at once, and Tobias would have cried in gratitude, except that he was struggling to breathe. My great friend, let him go.

He’s just a human.

Not for long. Let him go. Or I will make you.

Kiorl snarled, snorted, and dropped Tobias. The young man landed in a heap on the floor, his ankle twisting underneath him as he collapsed. Kiorl pulled the knife from his armour and sent it skittering off across the floor.

“You try that again, and I will kill you.” He shivered unhappily. “You can fuck off too, Nas. Get out of my head.” He bright eyes fixed on Tobias once again. “You need to learn to control yourself better. I find you in my head again and no status or shiny jewellery will save you. Get out.”

Tobias blinked, the words he wanted to say at war with his self preservation. Eventually, pride won.

“I still have to cook.”

Kiorl barked a sharp snarl full of deep displeasure, gathered his things, and stalked off, his fur visibly prickling. After a long, tense moment, Sitka’s curly horns appeared around the doorway. He sighed, and stepped into the kitchen.

“Gods and Mountains, you’re both still alive. Fuck… honestly I wouldn’t have been surprised to find this place looking like an abattoir.” With his easy going swagger restored, Sitka sat himself down at the counter and grinned. “What’s for dinner?”

Tobias rolled his eyes, and smacked him with a tea towel.

*

Zai smoothed the fabric of the suit jacket over Tobias’s shoulders, and imagined ripping through it with his claws. Tobias turned and glared at him.

“Not now.”

“I didn’t realise quite how good you were gonna look in it, Sweetling.”

Tobias shivered. Not helping! He was nervous enough as it was, because in the middle of the night he’d sat up in their bed, sweating and shivering, and forced the low level glows to come on to try and soothe his shattered nerves. Standing on the roof didn’t count, and Tobias had realised he hadn’t been out in Hell since the day he’d first arrived. He had stayed in the house for more than whatever passed for a month by his reckoning, and the idea of going out into the Inner Circle of Hell scared him.

It’s your home now, you idiot. You can’t spend the rest of your life being scared.

And what if Zai gets into a fight over me?

He won’t.

Tobias turned to look at his lover and bit his lip.

He might.

“I can feel you thinking away in there Sweetling. What’s there to be scared of?”

Everything. Tobias took a deep breath, and tried to clear his mind. He couldn’t, because everywhere he and Zai touched, all he could feel was his lover’s excitement, his pride, his lust, and the now-familiar void of emotion where Tobias knew another empath would sense love.

“Nassau already likes you,” Zai spoke as he adjusted the open collar of the formal shirt he’d brought along with the suit to best show of the Chain of Possession, “and the Palace is a beautiful place. And Kiorl went Upstairs already.”

“He’s been avoiding me.” Tobias commented unhappily.

“Yes. And no.” Mostly he’s avoiding me. “I’m the second ranked demon in the house, after Kiorl. And probably the most powerful of all the minor demons in Hell. I’m certainly older than- never mind.” Whatever Zai had been about to say, he covered it well. “Kiorl is a very proud person: losing face, even privately, isn’t an option for him. A dozen demons of the Royal Court would love to usurp his position.” Zai smiled. “Come, my Sweetling. It is a very nice day in Hell, and I would like to walk with you.”

It reminded Tobias of the first time he’d walked with Zai, only it wasn’t raining, it wasn’t dark, and he was wearing a pair of well made leather shoes which actually fit. Zai took his hand as they descended the slope which lead from the house, and Tobias allowed himself to look around the vista of the Inner Circle. There were colours he’d not noticed before, little plants with dark foliage growing in cracks between stones and boulders, creepers clinging, impossibly, to the banks of rivers made of molten fire, and skittering beetles with iridescent shells which clicked their carapaces and vanished into tiny shadows as they walked by. A slender green and black scaled snake sat coiled on lump of smooth basalt the size of the brewers wagon, and raised it’s head to watch them as Tobias walked past.

“Servants of Sathriel. Everyone has been very curious about you.” Zai sniggered as he gestured to a group of half a dozen demons, each different in build and appearance, who stood in a cluster at the next intersection of pathways. “Demons are the worst gossips!”

“Good day, sir.”

A woman wearing a long, heavy embroidered robe, and a huge man with red skin and long fangs bowed to them as they passed, then quickly returned to their hushed conversation with a man with practically white scales and narrow eyes. Tobias couldn’t hear what they said, and Zai’s pride was a much more interesting an emotion than their curiosity.

“Am I the only human in Hell?” he asked eventually.

“Yes. And the first in many decades to stay. People don’t bring their playthings and prey in through the West Portal after all.” Zai gestured across the circle to where the great door stood like a cut-out in the fabric of reality, and Tobias craned to look at where their house stood, now seemingly tiny, on the hill. “You see why our house has the best view?”

“I didn’t think we’d been walking that long...”

“Distance is fluctual,” Zai said cryptically. “It’s a long explanation, it can wait for another time. Come, let’s go be announced.”

Up close, the Palace was even more confusing than it had been each time Tobias had stood on the roof and tried to look at it. There were architectural features he didn’t know the names of, and many that seemed to defy the laws of gravity. There was a tower which ended in an onion shaped dome so twisted it didn’t look like it would survive a stiff breeze, and walkways which spanned enormous distances from one part of the building to another, each narrow as a ribbon. Unlike Zinkara Rumah’s simpleness, the Palace looked exactly like it had been pieced together out of bits of whatever had taken Nassau’s fancy at the time.

The Prince’s chuckle in his mind was neither unwelcome nor totally unexpected.

Sweet you of Tobias, but I didn’t build the whole thing myself. Come, Horace will show you in.

Horace was a fish, wearing something Zai told him was a waistcoat and galoshes, and he waited for them at a doorway which was many times taller than Tobias, but only wide enough to admit one of them at a time.

“There are other doors,” Zai assured him as they stepped into the sudden darkness. Don’t let go. I’m not losing you.

Tobias gripped Zai’s fingers tightly as they were lead out into a wide hallway, brightly lit with a soft white light, the floor beneath their feet tiled in majestic colours and patterns the likes of which Tobias had never seen before.

“The Prince is in the Arena, he is expecting you.”

“Thank you Horace.” Zai inclined his head politely, and they followed the wet slap of the fish who walked them through the Palace.

Tobias lost count of the rooms they passed, or long galleries they walked through, or stairs they climbed, and it was a relief when Horace stopped at a sleek pale stone door without stepping through, and bowed to them.

“A pleasure to see you in the Palace sirs. Good day.”

Tobias didn’t quite know what he was expecting, but he pushed the door open to reveal an amphitheatre of enormous size, tiered seating where more than a thousand souls could happily sit, occupied by only a few dozen. On the floor of the sandy arena, a black minotaur with white stripes painted across his fur did battle with what appeared to be a giant cockerel with a flaming tail and swords for spurs. Tobias gaped.

Shut your mouth, or you’ll catch flies.

The young man span around to find Nassau in the near deserted stands, and pinned him with a glare.

Sorry. It seemed like such an appropriate phrase. You were clearly raised by good people. Come, join me.

Tobias kept a hold of his mate as they worked their way along the curving stands to where Nassau sat, shirtless in nothing but a heavily pleated kilt lined with cloth of gold, talking off handedly with a thick-set man dressed entirely in hard boiled leather. He would have looked human, except that his skin was bright green like new grass, and his hair was scarlet.

“He’s put in the hours in training, and his form is coming along well. I’m hoping he’ll do well at The Games this year.”

“Well, Kage certainly does know how to pick a winner.” Nassau replied.

“Hmmmm,” the green man frowned. “I just wish he wouldn’t eat them afterwards. Hello Zai, not seen your face here in forever.”

Zai smiled broadly.

“You fancy testing those quick wits of yours in the ring?”

Come, Nassau stood, bowed slightly to his friend, and gestured to Tobias. They have much catching up to do, and we should talk.

Tobias wasn’t sure about leaving Zai, he’d never been anywhere in Hell without the demon by his side, but Zai emanated a content happiness, flashing with bravado and a desire to show off, and Tobias dropped his hand.

“Hang on.” Zai caught his lover, pulled him firmly into his arms, and kissed him soundly. Tobias felt his spine melting under the onslaught, and by the time Zai broke the kiss, he was panting. “OK. Now I’m good.”

I shall miss you until you return, my Sweetling.

Tobias wanted to say something flippant and off-hand, but he could only smile, brush Zai’s chest fur with a lingering hand, and follow the Prince of Hell down the last few tiers of stands and out through a little door set into an otherwise unremarkable wall. It was pitch black for a moment, then there was the distinct sensation of movement, and just as Tobias began to get really worried, Nassau opened a second doorway and Tobias stepped out into bright sunlight.

He stared, then stared some more, than turned to look at Nassau’s soft smile.

“Welcome to the garden. I built it right after the war. Do you like it?”

“It’s… amazing. Are those real trees?”

“Yes.”

Tobias gazed at the blue sky, streaked with occasional clouds near the horizon, the soft natural warmth of the sun on his skin, the breeze with ruffled the pink and white blossom laden branches of the trees. The grass was soft when he bent to touch it, and as he dug his fingers into the soil he found it rich, dark, and loamy, and full of fat pink worms.

“But… how?” This is impossible.

You’re in Hell talking to a Prince, he reminded himself. Impossible is a very flexible word.

“I am the second most powerful creature in this entire dimension,” Nassau laughed happily as he spoke, “but even I’ll admit it was a lot of work. The garden is special, private. No one can come here without my express permission. Use your mind Tobias, why is the garden special?”

The young man frowned, but Nassau’s easy smile made him curious, and for the first time since Kiorl had threatened to kill him, he let himself fully relax.

And he couldn’t find Zai.

He could feel Nassau, sense his deep calm, he could feel the birds – their fast lives too quick for him to access in any detail – in the branches of a nearby tree, but he had no sense of the demon he slept beside. Tobias stretched further, searching, but there was nothing. Nothing outside of the garden. He turned back to the door they had come through, finding the outline etched into the bark of an enormous tree, and wanted to scream.

Calm. Nassau single command was powerful and strong, but also cool and serene. Tobias stilled his panic instantly, and looked at the Prince. The world is still there, as is the man you love. Here in the garden, the sky above us shields us from the minds of others, and shields us from them. Nassau stroked the nearest tree with a sad smile. After Mattias died, I began to spend a lot of time here. It was the only way Zai ever managed to get any rest at all, poor thing. My grief nearly consumed him.

“What happened with Kiorl mustn’t happen too often. Partly, you can learn to control your responses – you’ve been doing that all your life anyway I expect – or your world would have burnt you as a witch.” Nassau rolled his eyes and began to walk, Tobias followed him quickly, and fell into pace beside the Prince. “All the versions of Earth I’ve ever visited have a very… zealous, relationship to magic and religion. It’s a shame really. But they also produce the most interesting people too. I brought you here to teach you how to control your empathic skills a little better. That way you won't have to stumble upon the image of Kiorl fucking my father quite so unexpectedly.”

Tobias blanched at the memory.

Really, I could have gone my whole life without seeing that.

Indeed. Nassau arched a perfect eyebrow at him, and the lines of fire which marked his skin glowed briefly. “Shall we begin?”

Tobias tried to examine Nassau’s emotions, just as he’d been asked, but it was like trying to penetrate a sheet of ice the size of a cathedral. Every time he thought he felt something distinct, it slipped away, and Tobias was left feeling frustrated.

You turn it inwards, Nassau told him silently, his tone so light as though the mental exertion was nothing. All those grasping vines twist to become an armour to protect yourself. It will take time, and practice. Now, keep me out.

Nassau brushed against his mind, and because the Prince was kind, friendly, and because Tobias felt safe with him, he reached out automatically towards the contact. The slap was a shock, and tears sprang up in his eyes.

“Ow...”

“I am sorry. Resist. You must try.”

Tobias inhaled deeply, the scent of the trees and the grass reminding him of the place he had once called home. He’d spent his whole life protecting himself, and it had been a relief to feel safe within the circle of Zai’s arms. But he couldn’t live in their room forever, and he couldn’t have what happened with Kiorl occur with another powerful demon who might not respond so well to Nassau’s interruption. Nassau reached out to him again, and Tobias glared at him, and pushed.

There was no physical movement, but the sensation vanished, and Nassau’s smile broadened considerably.

Not looking will get easier, I promise. And you have better self control than Sitka does. Nassau sniggered silently. I always liked that boy, it’ll be interesting to see what his future holds if you don’t kill him for his unbridled lasciviousness first!

“I did OK?”

“It will take more work, but it’s a great start. Come, let us sit and eat apples in the orchard.”

There was a lemon-yellow python curled up under the apple tree, and it raised its fat wedge-shaped head and hissed lazily at them before unrolling itself, and slithering off, brushing against Nassau’s leg as it did so.

“Nice to see you too Ba’al!” Nassau called mockingly after the serpent.

Nassau arranged himself on the grass as though relaxing after a fine summer’s picnic, his immense wings spread out over the short grass, fine slim fingers combing over the plants, plucking and twisting a little blue petalled daisy with a smile. Apart from the fire on his skin, it was easy to forget that he was a demon. He stuck the flower behind his ear, and his yard long hair twisted itself up into a bun behind his head. Tobias sat carefully opposite him, and yelped in sudden surprise as two shiny red apples fell directly into his lap. He handed one to Nassau with a silent question.

“I dabble a bit in magic.”

“But that’s not what you want to talk about?” Tobias bit into his apple. It was perfect.

Why don’t you ask the question which has been bothering you Tobias?

“You said you could help me, so that I could feel Zai’s love. Will you?”

“Yes. But it is not simple.”

Tobias nodded firmly.

“I love him. I don’t want to be without him, but I’m not his pet.” I swear if Kiorl calls me that again I’m going to shave his hair in his sleep.

“Now, now… please don’t make me choose between you and my oldest friend. He would look silly with no hair. Tell me Tobias, do you think of the future?”

I always wondered if I’d grow up to look like my father.

And what if you never aged another day?

“What?” Tobias stared at the Prince of Hell as his mind grappled with the statement. “What do you mean?”

“Demon’s don’t age, at least, not past the stage when they reach maturity. Zai will never age, he will be the way he is forever. But you are ageing as you sit here. You are very young, you do not notice it, but in another decade? Or thirty years? Or sixty? Will you be happy to age whilst everyone else you know remains the same?”

“But...” Zai can heal me.

“My dear friend, Zai can do many things, but even he cannot stop the wheel of time. You will, one day, die.”

“I couldn’t do that to him!”

Nassau nearly glowed with pleasure.

“Then you will join us, become a demon? An immortal? In return, I can give you the ability to sense love, just as you ought to.”

“Yes.”

The Prince’s smile broke into a broad grin, and he bit his apple.

I always hoped he would be happy, oh long lost brother.

“Brother?!”

“Damn, I can see why Kiorl was blind-sided by you. You’re so smooth. Such power is very rare among humans.”

Tobias swiped the apple from the lounging demon.

“Don’t change the subject. What did you mean, that Zai is your brother?”

Nassau thought hard for a minute, and when Tobias tried to read him all he could sense was the Prince’s uncertainty, and the distinct feeling that there was a secret not often shared, waiting just out of reach.

What did Zai tell you about how he spends his time Upstairs?

Willingly, Tobias played for the Prince the visions Zai had given him, of being a small, powerless, feline, alone and lonely, and waiting for the moon to change.

But I don’t know why. Is it like that for all demons?

No. “You remember when I told you that Hell wasn’t always as you see it now?”

Tobias nodded.

“Well, there was a time even earlier than that. Before I was made, my Father had another family. He wanted companionship and heirs, and so he split his power – unwisely as it turned out – between thirteen children. Each different, each gifted. And Zai was one.

“Demon teenagers are just as bad as human ones, or worse depending whom you ask, and are not content to live forever purposeless in their Father’s shadow. They got together one night on their favourite Earth, and hatched a plan to overthrow him.”

Some people call this the First Rebellion.

Tobias nodded as the words snagged at the feeling of importance which had lingered ever since he’d first heard the words.

There was a second one? He asked with mounting worry.

Yes. But that’s a story for another time.

“Father found out, of course. He gathered up and killed the ringleaders, and cursed the rest.”

Tobias had a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach as he realised where the story was going, and blinked when he realised the trepidation was Nassau’s, flavoured with his stormy smokiness.

“He left them on that Earth, stripped of their powers and tied to the moon. They each had three days in their true shape, and the rest of time they were damned to live as animals with no way to come home.”

“What happened to them?” Tobias tried not to imagine Zai as a simple animal, alone and small and scared, but he did anyway.

“I do not know the specifics. This was before I was made, and then whilst I was a child in Hell. I know some died, hunted down by predators whilst powerless, mourned by no one. Some found their other siblings, and waited it out until the moon blessed them with their power. Then they fought and killed each other, absorbing the power of the others. I know from Zai’s memory he killed at least three of his siblings. Eventually, there was only Zai left.

“Things in Hell had changed by then. I and my two brothers were grown, and things were something like they are now. Kiorl was already living in Zinkara Rumah. And it was Kiorl who found him Upstairs. Alone, practically feral, covered in blood, and living in some godsforsaken hovel, his memory ruined by so many years living as an animal. Kiorl brought him home. He’s not as heartless as you think.”

The image of Kiorl, his hair longer, his clothes different, stumbling through the West Portal with a skinny, bloody, matted furred version of Zai slumped over his shoulders, sprang into Tobias’s mind.

“Does… Does Zai know all this?”

“I don’t think so, though I don’t truly know. Most of what I’ve told you, I learnt from studying the murals and mosaics in the Palace. Some people know about the rebellion, but not about what happened afterwards. We identified Zai by a relief carving of him when all thirteen heirs had lived in Hell. All he remembered was his own name, and that he’d killed the only other demons he’d ever met.

“He is, in a very real way, my brother, though he seems not to be aware of it. He is older than me, the only living demon to be so, apart from Father.”

“Don’t you have other brothers?” Tobias questioned, though he already knew the answer.

“Not any more.” Nassau took a deep, cleansing breath, and Tobias knew suddenly that the Prince had never gotten to say all this out loud to anyone else ever before. “It’s why we’re both empaths, he and I. Father tied parts of himself to each of his children. In Zai he put what he loved and hated most – his desire for violence, and his need for company. When we brought Zai home, Father didn’t appear to remember him and didn’t realise he was an empath.

“Kiorl thought that best, so we kept him out of the Royal Court, settled him at Zinkara Rumah, and gave him a job. And now, he has you. I have always wanted him to be happy.”

“What happens if I tell Zai all of this?”

What good would it do? He cannot be Prince, he is not strong enough to kill me, nor would he want to. And I certainly don’t want to hurt him. And Father… Nassau shuddered visibly.

“My Father is known for holding grudges. He could kill him, Kiorl too for covering up the truth, though he’d have more problem disposing of me. Two thousand years of peace and stability would be undone in a heartbeat.” Nassau stood, every moment incredibly graceful, and Tobias scrambled too his feet beside him. “But you deserve to know who you’re choosing to spend forever with. So, Tobias, what do you wish for?”

The Prince plucked one long, bronze feather from his wing and held it out with a soft smile. Tobias smiled back, because they both already knew the answer.

You know how to use it?

Tobias thought of the image he’d seen in Zai’s memory, the only time he’d ever seen the Prince of Hell truly happy, and nodded.

Yes.

Wait for a quiet time, and hold everything you want in your mind when you do it.

They had reached the door etched into the tree, and Nassau opened it with one hand as easily as if it had been any other normal egress.

“Oh, and Tobias?”

“Yes, Nassau?”

“Nice suit.”

Tobias arrived back in the Arena in time to see Zai’s opponent step back and raise whatever it was that passed for it’s hands in defeat, then spit black blood on the floor. Tobias tucked the feather into the breast pocket of his suit, and smiled down at his lover.

I missed you.

I know.

I’m gonna do horrible things to you later. Zai grinned lewdly over the stands.

Tobias blew a kiss to his lover. He thought of standing in the huge kitchen of the house he called his home, imagining whisking sugar into egg whites to make a batch of Forgotten Cookies he’d actually get to eat, and smiled.

But first, dinner.