Chronicles Of An Academic Predator - 30. Chapter 30

December 31, 1962

I slept in again. There was no reason to get up. There was no one I wanted to see or talk to. I figured I'd go to Dino's tonight for the New Year. Or maybe I'd just stay home. I lounged in bed, refusing to expend the effort to be active. Everyone would be so much more comfortable if I just stayed locked away, out of sight and out of mind. When Jason came home, I'd talk to him about flying back. If I could get him to do that, I'd bail today. I was sick of this place again. If I ever decided to come back again, I'd need to make sure it was for very short visits.

There was a knock on the door. I got up and opened it. It was my mother, of course.

“I'm sorry about last night.” she said.

“It's not your fault mother. You're just stuck in the middle. The sooner I'm gone, the sooner things will be easier for all of us.”

“You are probably right JP, but I like having you here.” I smiled at her.

“Well I have a solution. Instead of me coming here, why don't you come to Chicago? I'd wait until the weather gets nice though,” I joked.

“I may just do that,” she said. She patted me gently on the cheek and left. I followed her to the door and locked it. I wanted to control my environment.

I took a shower, which should have been refreshing, but for some reason it just made me want to sleep again, so I hopped into bed and went back to sleep. I was awakened by a hand stroking my chest, flitting over my nipples and making them hard. And that's not the only thing. I opened my eyes to find Jeff staring at me.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” I responded. Then I just looked at him. It was up to him to talk.

“I'm sorry about yesterday,” he said.

“Yeah, well you were a big dick.” I responded, unrelenting.

“I've been told that,” he said, joking, but I didn't laugh.

“So what the fuck was wrong with you?” I asked. He climbed in bed with me and laid his head on my chest. Goddammit. He was just so cute. How could I ever stay mad at this guy? I found my hand moving and my fingers running through his hair in direct opposition to the intentions of my brain. He smiled up at me.

“I'm too cute for you to stay mad at me,” he said cockily.

“Oh yeah? Well you may not want to test me on that, especially today.”

“What do you mean?”

“Don't change the subject asshole. You have some explaining to do first. Then, if I decide to forgive you, I’ll tell you my latest tale of woe.”

He lay there silently, snuggled up against me. “I think I'm a fag,” he said. Another long pause. “Remember how we talked about types of guys. Well at first I thought I was a normal guy, just horny, looking for a hole, any hole. That was the easiest to deal with. But after awhile I figured out that wasn't it. I loved having sex with you too much, and I liked doing faggy things, like sucking your dick.” He smiled up at me and I stroked his cheek. He played me like a flute. “Then I figured that maybe I was one of those guys who likes both girls and guys. Bisexuals you called them. I play around with Carol, kiss her, play with her boobs, feel her up a bit, and that's fun and all, but nothing like when I'm with you. Then when you fucked me, well, guys don't do that unless they're queer.” I decided not to interrupt him to argue about that. “That's when I realized that I'm a full-out faggot. I thought that when I noticed guys in the locker room it was just normal curiosity. I should have known when I jacked off thinking about them it was more than that.”

We just laid there in silence, with me holding him and stroking his back or running my fingers through his thick, blonde hair.

He finally broke the silence. “So anyway, that just kind of brought the whole thing crashing in on me. And it was a lot easier to blame you than to deal with it myself. Especially seeing how your Dad's dealing with it, freaking out and shit.” He looked back up at me, those violet eyes staring into mine. “So will you forgive me?”

“Yeah, I'll forgive you, you stupid asshole,” I said as lovingly as I could. He smiled big and then our lips met. I turned over, exposing my ass to him. “Why don't you re-assert your masculinity big guy?” I asked teasingly.

“Gladly,” he said, and took off his pants, lubed his pole, and entered me.

After we made love and were laying there enjoying the denouement, I explained my confrontation with my Dad. This time I was lying on his soft chest and he was stroking my back. I told him about my dilemma with Jason.

“I've got an idea,” he said. “Why don't we get up, shower, and head to Chicago?”

“Now?” I asked.

“Yep.”

“What about Jason?” I asked.

“He can drive my car back when he's ready. Hell, he can even bring Vivienne with him and she can ride back with me. School doesn't start up again until the 14^th. Come on, let's go,” he said, almost begging.

I got up and headed to the shower. “Car's already packed. I just need to clean up and talk to Jason.”

He followed me to the shower. “Might as well save some water,” he said.

Cleaned up, refreshed, and golden with a plan, I tracked Jason down in the kitchen. “So Jason, here's the plan. I'm leaving for Chicago right now. Jeff's riding with me and he's leaving you his car. You can come back anytime as long as you make it by the 12^th. Then he'll drive his car back.” I saw Jason digest this new plan. “Oh, and Jeff says that if you want to come back earlier and bring Vivienne, he'll drive her back with him.” That sealed the deal.

“Sounds good JP. Thanks a lot.” Jeff walked in with his bag and tossed his keys to Jason. I headed to the living room to speak with both of my parents.

I explained the plan to them. My mother just nodded.

“I'm not sure that I like that idea,” said my father. “That's a lot of driving for Jeff.”

“I don't recall asking for your input or permission. I was merely informing you.” We just glared at each other. Then I left.

We stopped at Tonto's and spent a decent amount of time talking. I told her all about my latest confrontations with my father, and she urged me to be patient. Whatever. Around 3pm we were on the road heading to Chicago. I was in a great mood. I thought it was because I was getting the fuck out of Claremont; I hadn't paused to consider that it may be because Jeff was with me, but deep down I knew that was the real reason.

The drive was great. It seemed like so long since we'd done this. I'd forgotten how easy it was to be with him, how we could be calm and quiet, and it was OK. No, not just OK, it was comfortable and pleasant. We made it to Chicago at 11pm and grabbed a couple of pizzas downtown at a place that was always open. We got to the condo, unloaded all of our shit, and sat down to eat. I flicked on the television just in time to see the ball drop (again, for central time) I leaned over and gave Jeff a big kiss.

“Happy New Year,” I said.

“Happy New Year to you,” he responded.

January 11, 1963

The past ten days had been a dream. Having Jeff back in Chicago and having the condo all to ourselves had been unbelievable. The weather was shitty so we really didn't want go out, but that was just fine. We stayed in the condo and fucked like rabbits. I was once again reminded of our nine year age differential, and how the body of an 18 year old could rebound about every 20 minutes. It's a good thing that he decided that he liked to be fucked too or I would be too sore to even walk. Not that I cared about that. If I had to label the last ten days the word I'd use would be “euphoria.”

Jason had called yesterday and said he'd get back tonight. He planned to leave Claremont around noon, so we planned for him to get in around 8pm or 9pm. He was on top of the world. I was surprised he wasn't bringing Vivienne with him. Apparently they'd been inseparable. He told me that as soon as I left things had pretty much settled down at home. That didn't exactly make me feel terrific, but I was glad for my mother's sake.

I watched the weather report on the news. So far this was shaping up to be one of the coldest Januaries in history. It seemed that the furnace was on constantly, but with the wind whipping around the windows it was still cold. I'd taken to keeping the drapes closed and that helped. At least it seemed cozier. That and it started snowing again. We'd gotten three inches last night and they were predicting another inch tonight. (I smiled to myself. I'd gotten about seven inches last night.) Chicago in the winter blew chunks. No one would live here if the summers weren't so spectacular.

Finally, about 11PM, an exhausted Jason came staggering into the condo. “The fucking weather sucks,” he said bitterly.

“Glad you made it back safe and sound!” I said. Jeff went over and put an arm around his shoulder and gave him a 'man hug'. “So how were things in Claremont?” I asked.

“Shitty.” I just waited for him to continue. “Things around the house were quiet after you left. Your parents were great. I think I'm going to adopt them. Your father still refuses to even talk about you, but your mother makes up for it. I think she talks about you all the time to either piss him off or remind him that you're still around.” He chuckled at that.

“So what made things so shitty?”

“Fucking women. Vivienne. We had a great time. I really liked her. A lot. Then yesterday, my last day in town, she blows me off, cancels our date. I decided to go down to Dino's, just to get out of the house for a bit, and you know, to drown my sorrows as it were. And there she is, sitting on some other guy’s lap. Fucking whore.”

“Sorry about that Jason. I hate to say I told you so...” I tried to joke, but he didn't smile. “Sorry. But you had a good time with her while you were there, right?”

“Yeah, I did. Finally lost my cherry. Man, sex was great. Awesome. I really have to do that more often!” Jeff and I cracked up at that. With that, we all headed to bed.

As soon as we got to my room and closed the door, Jeff and I shed our clothes. It was automatic, the need to connect, to be together. For me it was way more than just hormones, and I hoped it was that way for Jeff. We made love with a slow passion, savoring each moment. It seemed like we'd finally repaired the disconnection that happened when he fucked Stefan.

“It's our last night together,” I told Jeff as we lay in bed enjoying the afterglow of our recent round of sex. “I'm really going to miss you.”

“I'm going to miss you too baby,” he said as he snuggled up behind me. My teddy bear. I sighed contentedly.

“So what's gonna happen with you and Carol?” I asked.

“Guess we'll still go out,” he said. “I mean, it's senior year, there's the prom and everything. It will be nice to have a girlfriend. You OK with that?”

“You don't have to ask my permission to date someone. You do your thing and I'll do mine.” The words pained me as I said them, but how could I trust my fragile psyche to an 18 year old high school senior. I mean, Jeff's a mature guy, probably even more mature than me, but I didn't want to have to compete with his hormones.

“OK,” he said, but sounded kind of sad about it.

“What's wrong?” I asked, turning around to face him and look into those violet eyes.

“I'm in love with you, and I don't want anyone else.” God, he was so sweet.

“I love you too Jeff, more than I can say. But if we make some big commitment now, well, what happens if one of us has too much to drink and fucks up, or more to the point, fucks someone else?”

“I won't do that. I promise.” He was so sincere.

“Baby, I know you wouldn't hurt me on purpose, but I'm just an emotional wreck these days. I can't risk it.”

“You don't trust me?” He was offended.

“I trust you. If you were here, or I was in Claremont, I'd say let's go for it. But there's 400 miles between us. And I know how horny you are,” I said with a wink and reached down to grab his hardening pole.

He grinned at me. “OK. You know the key to my heart.” We made love again, only this time I entered him. The feeling of ecstasy visible on his face while I fucked him was one of the coolest things. To have this massive stud, this gorgeous hunk of man, thriving in delight just because I was penetrating him, short little me, was just amazing.

January 12, 1963

I woke up that morning with a cock up my ass. Jeff had snuggled up behind me and moved into me while I was sleeping, so the first feeling I was conscious of was his dick passing through my ring and then driving into my hole, right against my prostate.

“Morning baby,” he cooed in my ear. “I wanted to be inside you one more time before I go.” He gently plunged in and out of me, going so slow he was driving me nuts.

“Fuck me harder!” I cried.

“No baby, I want this to last. I want to feel you as long as I can. Then when I blow, I'm gonna fill up your ass.” He continued to move slowly in and out of me, keying me up so his head seemed to slowly plunge into me, not missing a single spot inside me. He picked up his pace. “You wanna feel me explode in your ass?”

“Oh yeah,” I said, almost incoherent with passion. Then he came, thrusting and thrusting and shooting and shooting. I wasn't there yet, which was great, because I was close and my senses were so stimulated it seemed like I could feel each pulse of his dick. Then he pulled his cock out of my ass, leaving me with that empty feeling, and rolled me onto my back.

The next thing I knew, his mouth was on my cock, and his finger penetrated my hole to take the place of his cock. There was no way I could hold off in the face of that overwhelming combination, nor did I want to. I blasted into his mouth and he swallowed my load, not losing a drop.

I pulled him to my chest and stroked his strong shoulders. “I have to get up baby,” he said, pulling away. I tried to hold him back but he just grinned at me. “Come on, you know I have to hit the road. I've gotta make it back by Monday and the roads are shitty.” I let him go and followed him into the shower. I kissed him under the running water, felt the water spray between us. Then I made him lean back while I washed him. I soaped his arms, those bulging biceps and firm forearms, that broad hairless chest with the soft, padded skin covering it, those dime-sized nipples that I loved to suck on. His abdomen, padded just like his chest, with his sexy as hell treasure trail.

I turned him around so his front got rinsed off while I washed his back. Those massive shoulders and strong back muscles that curved down to his cute ass, the soft padded sides that didn't show a hint of love handles, so fit was he beneath his coating. His ass, so smooth and soft until he tensed his muscles, turning his cheeks into two solid rocks. I bent over and washed his legs and feet, admiring his huge thighs and bulging calves. He turned around, sporting that 18 year old hard-on that never went down. I took him into my mouth and sucked him until he rewarded me with an early breakfast.

I watched him get out of the shower and dry himself off, and he smiled at my open admiration. I could spend my life looking at this guy, being with this guy, loving this guy. But what about him? Why would someone that looked like him want someone as skinny and short as me? I swallowed my insecurities before they destroyed my mood.

We came out of the bedroom to find Jason camped out at the table looking glum, still mooning over Vivienne. Jeff grabbed his bag and got ready to leave, and then he did something that really shocked me. He leaned over and gave me a kiss, not just a peck, but a long, deep, tongue-wrestling kiss goodbye, and he did it right in front of Jason. Then he opened the door and he was gone, headed back to Claremont.

I looked at Jason, who was wearing a shit-eating grin. “JP's got a boyfriend, JP's got a boyfriend,” he taunted, sounding like a little schoolgirl on the playground. I just laughed at him and blushed.

“Let's get something to eat and head up to campus. See if there's anything we need to know before Monday's classes start.”

“Whatever you say boss,” he said amiably, and we headed out into the winter frost.

Later that night, alone in bed, was when I missed Jeff the most. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the sex I missed. We had so much fun, and when he left I felt drained. Yet just an hour later I'd think of him and get horny all over again. But that wasn't the only thing, or even the most important thing. I missed having him here, him, the man, the person, the one who was so comfortable for me to be around that I never wanted him to leave. The man who I could snuggle up to in a way that made me feel like I had melded my body into his without sex, just contact.

I'd sworn I'd keep my guard up and I wouldn't let him in. I knew that if I did I'd risk my sanity, my psyche, and any chance I had at happiness. I struggled hard to keep him out, to keep the castle walls intact, but his battering ram had turned them to rubble. I was hopelessly in love with him. Please God, if there is one, don't let him hurt me.

January 14, 1963

As I headed to campus with Jason I was in a surprisingly good mood. He seemed confused by that, since I'd been pretty somber yesterday. It made me smile to think that he didn't know me as well as he thought he did. If I couldn't impress him with my strength and ability, I could at least be quirky. But he didn't seem to get how much I loved the first day of classes, meeting the students, setting the stage for the semester, and just the general commotion and newness of the whole thing.

I consented to teach the American History lecture hall class, primarily to earn brownie points with both Dr. Peterson and Dr. Broughton, who was supposed to teach it. I really didn't mind. It was a fun class, and I usually was able to make it interesting enough to pull in some history majors. The other class I was teaching was a senior/graduate level class on Decolonization. That was really exciting for me because it was entirely new, and because history was happening here and now. In the last six months several nations had won independence from their colonial masters, including Trinidad and Tobago, Uganda, Tanzania, Malawi, Jamaica, and Algeria.

I felt strong academically, and more importantly, emotionally. My vow to avoid entanglements, to avoid caring, was empowering, and besides Jeff, who was safely back in Claremont and conveniently out of my daily grind, and Jason, who was an employee and friend but not a love interest, I was free of that bullshit.

The first class, starting at 11am (I hated early classes, and I'd won that concession when I agreed to teach it) was the American History class. I always started my classes with a discussion of what was happening in the news. Today's news was pretty bleak. George Wallace became governor of Alabama and declared his motto: “Segregation now, segregation tomorrow, and segregation forever!”

There was a big guy, a hulking kind of guy, who decided to impress the class with his insights. “What's wrong with whites and niggers staying in their own neighborhoods?” He had a decided southern twang to his voice. One of the guys next to him chuckled.

“And who might you be?” I asked.

“Ronnie Boyd,” he said proudly, like that had some significance. Everything about his face was round, his head, his eyes, his nose, and even his mouth.