How I Live Now - 12. Day 13

Day 13.

I got paired with Amy again before lunch. We were setting up some stands for a demonstration to do with dogs. The company is launching a new category of grooming accessories for our four-legged friends, and it needed to be set up pronto. The big day is tomorrow, so everything was hands-on. There are still a few bits to do, and I'm not looking forward to it. The good news is Angela didn't bug me today; she kept her distance. I guess I showed her, huh? Okay, maybe that was a bit of cocky of me, and I know I'm no saint.

I got talking to Lee during lunch in the cafeteria, and somehow, we got talking about my money issues. Lee said when his wife totaled their car in a front-end collision, and the issuance company wouldn't payout for the guy she hit, they took a nifty loan from this guy who lived in the same neighborhood. Though Lee was adamant about weighing all my options before I jumped at that opportunity. I got this impression that it made Lee feel uncomfortable, so I didn’t push it further.

I still have the watch I found, and well, I saw a pawn shop on the way home, so I might drop in tomorrow during my break to see if I can get my rent and advance for Doug. It looks like it could be worth something, even though it's not gold plated. Actually, I've no idea what gold plated means; I'm assuming it's just a layer of gold melted down on top of something. I always heard folks talking about stuff like that on Auction Hunters. I got a few laughs out of people fighting for junk in storage bins, but sometimes they really made money from the trash. It always amazes me what people would purchase.

So, I suppose, if I can sell this junker at the pawnshop, I'll be able to pay for my bills. Cash is really tight now, plus I still need to eat. Wouldn't free meals at work be a fantastic idea? Maybe Biden should endorse that idea now that he is president. Free food for all the hard-working folks.

I could do with making a friend, so I can do something after work. It feels like since I moved, I'm really on my own, and it seems awfully lonely having to go back to Doug's apartment every evening. I've never had friends like you see in all those movies, where everybody is palsy. Where they go looking for a dead body and get covered in leeches or set out looking for treasure while pursued by some bat-shit crazy grandma with a short-snubbed gun and her nimrod children. I'm not searching for anything crazy, just somebody to share jokes or foolishly dress in drag as we talk about hot guys while sipping on sweet fermented grape juice and become winos by the time we are thirty.

I'll admit, but you didn't hear me say it if anybody asks; I'm missing mom. Just a bit, though, nothing major, and I'm certainly not missing my douchebag father. It makes me wonder if I should check up on her, knowing dad. Dad would probably beat her up just to get back me for leaving. Yet, mom never tried to leave the abusive asshole; she just accepted the behavior. Dunno, it's possible that she is afraid of the dick, but I'm done trying to care about her not wanting to leave. Though I still want to know if she is okay. Does that make me a horrible son? I've been feeling a bit homesick, not about living in my old home, but more so the sentiment of having something I know or a familiar face passing by in a school corridor.

I stopped by the bodega on the way home to buy some more food, and well, I'm down to my last $100, so I'm started to get stressed. I felt so embarrassed putting back stuff that I didn't necessarily need at the till. I felt like the cashier was passing judgments even though the young guy was probably just wishing I'd hurry up so he can get on with his day.

I'm going to get something to eat now, and maybe if Doug is feeling talkative, I'll try scrounge some conversation out of him before going to bed. I don't know, but I was under the impression that there would be lots of parties and I'd make many friends when I came out here. I want to live the high life, but there is nothing glamorous about being in St. Clement. The city is lovely and all, but I thought stuff would take off and that there would be some adventure. I'm partly disappointed with just stocking shelves and waiting for the day to end so I can clock out of work. I hate waiting for stuff to happen, and I have this itchy sensation in my chest that I've missed my opportunity for some fun. Wherever it's gone, come back, give me an adventure of a lifetime.

I’m gonna eat, maybe tomorrow I’ll stop by that pawn shop. I wish things would just slow down for a change.

Talk soon,

Kyle