All That Drama - 4. Chapter 4

I kept learning. I learned about the difference between a soliloquy and a monologue, directions on stage or looking at the stage. How to project your voice without yelling so even those in the back can hear you just fine. How to stand, how to sit, how to gesture...how not to gesture. It was all new to me because every moment I had to be aware of how the audience would see me. Could they see my face? Were they meant to at that moment?. Was I turned out too far or too little?

Sarah was a big help during those first weeks. Along with what Meg was helping me with she would fine tune it to where I seemed to have been in the theater my whole life. My best attribute was the blocking. I knew exactly where I had to be and when. “How do you do that?” asked Connie one day.

“Actually football. Taught me where I needed to be in the overall scheme of things and how to get there if my way was blocked.”

“Yeah right!”

“He's telling the truth,” Hector said. “He may be an average actor, and getting better, but he is the best damned quarterback I have ever seen.” I blushed a bit. I had gotten a sincere compliment out of him. I was a good quarterback, I knew that, but it was the actor part. He was noticing I was getting better. Hell he was noticing me period. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye and he wore a kind of silly grin, like he knew what he was doing to me and found my reaction so adorable. “Still needs to work on his lines though.” I snorted. The Hector I was coming to know was back.

One afternoon in late January was devoted solely to the fight scenes. There were two of them and the one with the least cast members had five fighters. This one was set in a bar, what a shock for a western play, and I was required to break six bottles and two tables in the sequence. Anything more would be icing on the cake. I asked to see what the basic set would look like when it was complete. In a few minutes I had the layout done and was looking it over. “Okay. Sheriff Tate would be about here when the fight begins.” I stood where the bar was to be. It was represented by a rope for now as it had not been built yet. Six X's were the bar stool positions and the tables were set out, including two breakables. “Outlaw one and two would be at this table with bystander three, four and five at this one playing cards.” I walked over and gestured. The cast members placed themselves accordingly. “Moe the barkeeper you know where you are.” He stood behind the bar. “Deputy one, me, is by the Sheriff, and Black Pete will be center stage.” Hector took his place. He was the villain of the story, a weaselly man who was into gambling and killing anyone who beat him. “Everyone else knows where they need to be I hope, because I did not look at that part yet.” The other cast members took their places where there were open chairs or bar stools. I looked around and closed my eyes. I began to move about the stage throwing punches and knees, missing everyone by fractions of inches. A few flinched but I had aimed far enough away that they would not get hit. I avoided everybody and wound up on the other side of the stage.

“What was that?” asked the teacher.

“The flow of the fight in my head.”

“With your eyes closed?” I nodded. “I could have sworn you were watching where you were going.”

“Naw, I knew where everyone was.” They all just gawked. “So I'm a freak of nature, can we move on?” They laughed at me and with me so it was cool. “Okay. Sheriff, you will make your way towards Pete. Tyler, I want you to get in his way a bit because he is going to shove you out of the way and you'll crash into Brad.” I showed them slowly how I wanted it to look and they got it in one try. “Great. Sheriff, once past him you'll swing on Pete but he'll duck and spin around to kick you in the rump and send you crashing into this breaking table where the bystanders sit. They will either fall out of their chairs or jump away.” I demonstrated the spin and kick. “Can you handle that, Hector?” He tried it but got hung up by his own feet. I helped him up and helped him place each foot to get him down and behind the Sheriff. It took a few tries, but he got the gist of it. “We'll work on that. Once the bystanders are scattered I and the outlaws join the fight. Hector will duck my punch, grab my arm and throw me at the outlaws for them to deal with me.” They groaned. “Hey, only one of you guys get beat and arrested.”

The rehearsal went into the evening and I was happy with the progress as a whole. No one was getting hurt even on accident so that meant the were learning how to fall, hit and take a hit faster than I could have hoped. There was only one snag and that was Hector. He just could not get his feet and body to cooperate. I think it had to do with the various steel pins and that permanent limp. “Hey, Hector, can I talk to you?” Everyone was leaving for the night and he looked a bit uncomfortable but he nodded. “I know this seems a bit awkward, but you'll get the hang of it.”

“It's just, I'm not much of a fighter. I can't even dance. No coordination.”

“Then we'll work on it. Do you have the time now or should we schedule a session?”

“Really? You'd take time to help me?” He seemed shocked.

“Yeah. It's my job and if it will help you become a better actor, then I want to help.” I tried to put every fiber of sincerity into my voice.

“I guess we could do it now. Where though?”

“We could use the grass outside the PA wing. No one will be around this late.” He shrugged and we left the auditorium. There was no one out there. It was a Thursday night and late classes stopped at nine. It was after ten so no one would be there. We set our stuff by one of the trees and stood there for a moment. “Okay, the spin seems so be the most tricky.” He nodded. I stood next to him and took him very slowly through each step. Lean back while swinging your body to the right, left leg crosses right while the body circles, step with right leg and while rising kick with left leg. Twice I had to stabilize him and shift his foot to a better position so he could pivot. Once he fell into the grass and laughed at himself.

“I'm never going to get this,” he said laughingly as I helped him to his feet.

“Yes you will. I have faith enough for the both of us. I have never seen you fail at anything that had to do with acting yet and I will not see you fail at this.” He looked at me like I was that alien invader again. He had a way to combine looks, like I was either crazy or being very nice. “Let's do it again.” I took him through it a few more times slowly looking for his problem and I think I found it about the fifth time.

“This is impossible.” I rushed at him with my arms out and he ducked my grab, pivoted and kicked me in my ass. “Justice!” I went sprawling into the grass with a laugh. He ran over to see if I was hurt because I was not getting up. He turned me over and saw I was laughing too hard to stand. “That is not funny! I thought I hurt you.”

“Do you realize you did it?” He looked at me in confusion. “You did it perfectly.”

It took a moment for it to sink in but the spreading grin was so full of wonder that I wanted to reach up and give him a hug. “I did it. How?”

“It was too slow for the move to carry you through. You lost your balance because it was too slow.” He took my hand and helped me up. That contact had my heartbeat racing. I was holding his hand. I let go reluctantly and wiped grass and dirt off me. I could not stand holding his hand because I did not want to let go. “So let's try this at the speed it will be done.” Three times we tried it and all three times I was ducked and kicked.

“I've got it!” He was so proud of himself.

“Yup, now for the rest of the fight.” His smile of triumph fell away and I snickered. “It's not that bad. From the throw.”

It was all going perfectly until his natural clumsiness took over and he slipped. He was in the middle of a punch when he slipped. My face got in the way of a full weight left hook and he caught me right in the right eye. He fell down and so did I, only he fell atop me. We landed with an oof and began laughing. “Oh god did I hit you?” he asked through the laugh.

“My eye! My eye! I'm blind!” I was laughing hard because it hurt like hell but was totally funny. “You brute! You beast! You monster!”

“Oh shut up you drama queen.” That wiped the smile off my face. I was so shocked and the look on his face made me think he instantly regretted his choice of words. Then I began laughing again. “You are such an asshole Justice Anderson.” We lay there for a few minutes catching our breath when we both realized he was laying half on top of me and I was not caring. Well I was when I realized it. I liked the feel of him there. Our eyes met and I saw what Sarah meant. He was as torn up about our fight as I was and it showed in his eyes right then. He longed to make it right but did not know how. God I wanted to pull him down and hold him. I almost did too when he got up and helped me to my feet. My eye was starting to swell a little and I knew I would have a great black eye come tomorrow. “I hit you pretty good, didn't I?”

“Yeah, but it happens. I've had far worse in football.”

“I'm pooped and you're half blind so I think we should call it a night.” His voice was back to the neutral tone he'd had for the entire month. Did he not see how I felt when he looked into my eyes? I was such a coward to not tell him.

“Yeah. I'll see you tomorrow in class.” I grabbed my bag and tossed him his.

“Yeah. C'ya.” I could tell he wanted to say something, but he held back. He was as scared of being rejected as I was and I could no more tell him that I was falling for him than I could fly. He turned and walked to his bike to go home.

I passed the amphitheater and heard footsteps behind me. “Justice?” I was hoping it was Hector, but no.

“What are you still doing here, Seth?”

“Steven forgot about me again. Can I crash at your place?” I chuckled and put my arm around him.

“C'mon little bro.”

“Your eye okay?” I looked down at him. “Yeah I saw. The sissy boy walloped you a good one.” I shook my head.

“His name is Hector so please use it.” My tone was serious.

“Okay. Sissy boy or Hector he still got you good.” I laughed and gave the little pest a shove.

“Still does not mean I can't throw you into the koi pond from here.” He smiled and followed me back to my room. I flicked on the light and tossed my stuff in my desk chair. “You get the floor.” I unrolled a sleeping bag for him and got out an extra pillow. “You want to take a shower? I got an extra towel.”

“Yeah.” I got a good look at him. His side was covered in mud.

“How did you get all muddy?”

“I got knocked into the mud.” He said it so simply that I knew he was not upset about it and that made me know who did it. And why that dick Steven conveniently forgot to take him home.

“Why?” I wanted to get the story now when he was not there to intimidate the kid.

“He got turned down by Heather Murphy.” And he took out his anger on Seth, the Crowd's whipping boy. Not while I was around, but then I was not around much anymore. I tossed him the towel and gave him soap and shampoo.

“Leave the dirty stuff. I'll get it washed and you can wear something of mine tomorrow.” He looked like a kid in the candy store and a hundred bucks to spend there. He stripped right there and I sucked in my breath. There was a nasty bruise along his side and the left side of his chest. “Did he do that too?” Seth looked torn between telling me the truth and protecting someone he thought was his friend. “Never mind. By your silence I have my answer. Go shower.” I watched him wrap the towel around his tight body and had to admit he had a really great butt, but his abs were better. An eight pack with the V that formed where the legs and pelvis met. I was not attracted to him because he was like a brother, but I could see his appeal.

The next day was interesting. I was in the cafeteria that morning when the Crowd came by and stared. “Who the fuck clocked you one?” asked Steven as if he cared.

“I got into a fight last night.”

“Want us to find the fuck wad and kick his ass?”

I grinned. “No, it's over with. Ask Seth. He was there as my back up because someone forgot to take him home again.” Seth nodded. He was wearing a pair of my smaller jean shorts and a nice looking off white button up. Not a bad look on him with his dark skin except the shirt was a bit too big. “How many hits did the guy get in?” I asked Seth.

“Just the one, the rest was more like you were dancing with him.” I tried to hide my smirk because that was probably what it did look like to him. He did not even have to lie, which he was bad at, but he knew what not to say. He lived by the rule of “best to keep silent, and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.”

“So you whooped him? Good.” I got up and motioned Steven over like I always did when I wanted his help on something. “What's up bro?”

I kept a smile on my face as I said “If you ever lay a hand on Seth again because your ass gets turned down I will beat you so bloody they will have to use your dental records to ID you.” The color drained out of his face. He wanted to deny it or excuse himself, but I fixed him with a steady stare. “Are we clear?” He nodded. I clapped him on the back. “Thanks bro,” I said with false cheer. I guess the acting lessons were paying off. “C'mon little bro. We have history.”

Once out of earshot Seth looked up at me. “Will he listen?”

“I hope so, you little lip reader. For your and his sake, I hope so.”

“Why do you always stick up for me?” he asked.

“Honestly? Because you don't do it for yourself. It's the same with Hector and that night. He could not fight back, so someone had to help. And Jason that night. I guess I just don't think it's very nice or cool to pick on someone who can't fight back. You get it?”

“Like that mean Mister Gutierrez who kept hitting his daughter and Mama went after him with a frying pan.” I had been over at his house dropping him off when Steven had not and witnessed a massacre via non-stick Teflon coated cooking wear.

“Exactly. Your Mama was just doing something for someone who could not do it for themselves.” He nodded like he got it now. He also had that strange lucid look in his eyes like his brain was working a puzzle where only he saw the pieces.

Drama was just that. All of them came over to admire my shiner and ask how it happened. “I was helping a friend and got this as a reward.” Hector's mouth worked a few times like a fish out of water and then he went into the wings to start dragging set pieces in. Sarah, who probably knew how I got it, watched with amusement in her eyes. All the girls would come over and tell me what a great guy I was to help a friend and take a punch for him. It took every ounce of acting power not to laugh at how ridiculous it all was. I was able to extract myself from their worried clutches to help Hector move some of the heavier pieces.

“Friend, huh?”

“Would you rather me have told the complete truth? What would they say to that?”

“That you were stupid to help me when they know how klutzy I am.” He did not seem too happy with me right then. I had about enough of the attitude so when no one was watching I grabbed him by his shirt front and dragged him into the hall. He was so shocked that he could not utter a word.

“Listen. I have been trying my damnedest to be nice, to make up for all the shit I put you through.” His eyes were as big as saucers as I backed him against a wall. “I have been taking your tactless but true comments all month and waiting for even the smallest hint that what I've been doing has changed the way you think of me. I have been hoping you would see all of this not being your friend was bullshit. That I wanted to be your friend.” His mouth hung open like bear trap. “But no. You did not see it, so you know what, I'm going to tell you something I have been waiting for years to say.”

I was almost shouting and I clamped down so I did not. My jaw clenched as I ground my teeth to stop what I knew would be the most uncool thing for me to do...I would not cry in front of him. “I'm sorry.” By the stunned look in his eyes it was not what he had been expecting at all. “I am so damned sorry I put you through hell. I'm sorry you saw the military brat, homophobic, dip shit, dumb fuck moron that first day in school when you wanted to talk to me. I'm sorry I could not stop them from giving you that limp.” I wiped my eyes as my lower lip began to tremble. So much for coolness. “I'm sorry I've been everything I hate! I'm sorry for man handling you just now.” I was in tears and he just stood there with his mouth hanging slightly open. “I am so, so sorry about the lake and how I said things after to make you think I did not want to be your friend because dammit it's all I think about. Making up with you and letting you know I was not that guy any more.” There, the demon had been summoned. I had declared that I wanted to be his friend so badly that if he did not know by now that I wanted more he was a blind fool.

“So now it's on you. I've said what you told me to save when you showed up on my doorstep with a cane and stutter. I've saved it long enough. It's done. The next move is yours.” I ran back into the auditorium and grabbed my bag and ran out the back exit before anyone could get a word in edgewise. I ran to my dorm and slammed the door, put the bar in place and fell onto my bed. I had said way too much, told him somethings I never wanted him to find out. But it was out there now and I could not take them back. I was not crying when I got back to my room, I was past the tears and into a numbed state that just made me feel tired and lethargic. Why, oh why had I even opened my big mouth? And why had I grabbed him like that? He's probably telling Sarah right now that I was no different than last year and it has all been an act. I had screwed up every chance I had with him.

Someone knocked on the door but I just lay there wishing I could go back in time. I would stop the Senator from being shot thus stop my being shipped to JROTC which would mean I would have been in a different school and would never have met Hector and made his life hell. “Justice, it's Sarah, open up sweetie.” I lifted my head and then got up and opened the door. She rushed in and closed the door behind her and locked it. Great, she's going to kill me and I couldn't even call for help because she barred the door. “What's wrong, sweetie?”

“Wrong? My entire life is wrong. I'm in love with a guy I just threw up against the wall and yelled at while apologizing at the same time.” I went and sat on the bed and she sat next to me. “I am so mixed up inside right now I don't know what to feel. I'm so pissed at him and his attitude that I want to smack some sense into him, but the attitude is my fault and my stupid pride. I finally got to apologize for all the things I've done to him and I love him, Sarah. I'm so scared that he's going to really hate me now. I tossed him around like a rag doll so easily. It was absurd how easy it was to do and it scares me because now he will only remember the bad stuff and everything I have been trying to do has just been shit on and thrown out the window only to boomerang back and slap me across the face.

“And you're probably here to kill me because he told you everything and it only proves I'm the asshole of the century. You locked the door so I could not leave and you will lure me in with false worry and slit my throat or smother me or some other hideous way to die.” I stopped when she laughed. I turned my head to look at her.

“You have been hanging out in drama too much. Justice, I'm not here to kill you or do anything other than find out what is wrong with the two of you. Hector's hysterical and I could not get more than the word stupid out of him while he banged his head on the wall. So I came to the one place you could get away from everyone. And when I checked the cafeteria that Mexican chulo you're always hanging with said he saw you headed towards the dorms.” Little turncoat. I had never taken Spanish so I did not know what a chulo was. Probably another word for guy. All guy words end in O, right? “So I take it then that you blurted out that he's the reason you've changed?” I nodded. “Well good. Maybe it will be his wake up call and maybe he'll stop being so stupid and see how much you work every second to better who you are. I wish I had your drive to be a better person.”

“Sarah, you will always be a better person than me.”

“That is so sweet. Untrue, and I think that your stupor is clouding your brain, but sweet.” I smiled a bit. “Does he know the rest?”

“If he doesn't then he's blind. God let him be blind.” She looked at me quizzically. “That way if he still does not want me as a friend it won't be because... because he's not attracted to me.” She laughed at me. “I hate you,” I said pitifully. That made her laugh harder. “What is so funny?”

“Have you seen the guys he likes?” Only one, and I told her so. “He likes jocks. The bigger the arms and chest the better for him. And you, dear Justice, have both of those in spades.” I grinned shyly, her words staring to break apart this stupor. “There is only one last hurdle for you isn't there. He has to forgive you.” I nodded. “Well, sounds like if he doesn't he'll be the one missing out and being a dick.” I snorted. “What?”

“Nothing, it's a nasty comment.”

“Tell me.”

“Well, we are what we eat, aren't we?” She clapped and rolled back on the bed shrieking in laughter.

“You know that makes you a pussy, right?” I fell back beside her and we laughed for almost an hour. Turned out she was a cow, her favorite thing to eat being hamburgers. It was one of those afternoons where everything was funny. I was so emotionally drained that I found even the dumbest thing hilarious. The Crowd thought I was high. I missed drama, but then I was seriously thinking about dropping the class and taking band. I did not want to be rejected. “That is just the most retarded thing you have ever said, Justice Leonard Anderson. If you drop out of drama I will never forgive you. Not for the past, that's almost gone, but for working so damn hard only to let that idiot drive you away. The Justice I know is no coward, so do not even think it buster.” She drove her finger into my chest.

“You are trying to kill me with the finger of death. Help! Help!” She tried to glare as I spun in circles looking for someone to help me. Tried, but it turned into a look of fond silliness.

“God you two are perfect for each other. Both idiots.”

When I trudged into the cafeteria Seth looked up at me with concern. I love the kid, I do. He is just like a little Spaniel puppy that loves me no matter what and wants nothing more than to see me happy. “Are you okay, Justice? That pretty senorita from high school was looking for you. It seemed important that you see her.”

Pretty girl? Oh, Sarah. He thought she was pretty? Well, she did have a killer smile and a dynamite attitude, and Seth always did like his girls plump. “Yeah, I'm fine now. So, you think Sarah's pretty, huh? Want me to introduce you?” I nudged him with my elbow and he grinned and shook his head.

“She would not want me. I'm not smart enough for her.” His accent really comes out when he is feeling bad about himself.

“Bullshit, but if you ever want me to, I will.” He seemed to like that thought very well because his eyes glazed over as his entire brain cell was consumed by her. I laughed at the dreamy eyed look to his face and could not stop.

I had the weekend to stress over what he would say, what he would do. I do not deal well with waiting. I have to do something. So I did. I called up Meg and told her in no uncertain terms I was kidnapping her for all of Saturday and she could tell whatever boy toy she had seduced that I was taking his place. “Really? And I'm supposed to drop whatever plans I have to go listen to you piss and moan about Hec?”

“That and a shopping trip.”

“Did you say shopping?” Bingo. She said she would be in Redding as fast as she could get here legally.

“Good. I got one more call to make. See you later.” I called one last number.

“Sarah's House of Insanity, some are here some are not, this is Sarah, how may I direct your call?”

“Cute.”

“Hey sweetie! You called me? Wow, the highlight of my life.” She sounded happy that I called her. Sarcasm aside.

“I doubt it, but if you're really good I will tell you the name of a guy who has a crush on you. I'm serious about that too.”

“Nuh uh! Someone likes me?” She was so shocked and so disbelieving that I chuckled.

“Shocked me too. Not that he picked you, but that he picked any one.”

“Kinda a compliment but almost rude. You've been listening to the Idiot too much. I'll be good so I might get a date. So, what's up?”

“You, me and Meg are going shopping today, all day.”

“Really? This had better not be for sports gear. I will totally go ape shit on you.”

“Nope, not unless you want a jersey to sleep in or some strange girl cult ritual.” She snorted on the other side of the line.

“This would not be a 'I need to distract myself' outing would it?”

“Bingo. I'm too chicken shit to call him.”

“Good thing too because he's not even answering my calls. He's gone into seclusion for the weekend and when he does this no one can get him out of his room. So, where are we going?”

“You'll see.” I grinned evilly as I heard her grinding her teeth in an effort not to yell at me. She hates surprises.

Once Meg got to my dorm we swung by Sarah's house to pick her up. “Is this a ladies day out or what?” she asked when she jumped into the front seat. She would not fit into the back one and Meg knew that ahead of time.

“Har dee har har. Even if I was a girl, which thankfully I am not,” I said with so much conviction they laughed, “I wouldn't be no damn lady. Next stop, Redding airport.” Meg was suddenly grinning.

“Another one of those crisis days?” Meg asked.

“You could say that. You tell her, Sarah, I don't want to be crying while I'm driving.” So she did. She told her what had been happening since the last time I had spoken to her. All that drama that was my life and how much she was going to give “the Idiot” a piece of her mind when he was done thinking. Then to put it into a lighter note she told Meg about her secret admirer.

“And Justice won't tell me who it is.”

“Do I know him?” Meg asked.

“Don't know, but Sarah does. She's known him longer than she's known me.” Sarah kept grilling me for hints as we got on the plane, my father's plane that I had at my disposal anytime I wanted to use it. I'd used it more than he had. “I'm not telling you unless you're good.” She pouted. “Okay, I'll tell...Meg.” Her hopes had soared only to come crashing back down. I whispered into Meg's ear.

“Really? Well Sarah, he's not ugly by any measure. I'm not sure about his personality, but his body is nice and I do trust Justice's judge of his character.” I grinned as I passed out sodas. Seth would be turning so red to hear the Meg, the girl every guy in college wanted to bone, thought he had a nice body. The entire trip took us to Rodeo Drive and Beverly Hills with a stop on Fifth Avenue, Sacramento, Ashland Oregon and finally back to Redding. I had expected to spend a lot of money since I was footing the bill with my own money, but I was surprised how little they spent on themselves. When this had become a day that revolved around me I did not know, but somewhere between The Hills and Fifth Ave the girls had begun to pick out clothes for me and insisted I buy at least one they each picked out from every place we stopped. They insisted that I model everything, and by everything I mean anything they thought would go good with my pale complexion, raven hair and muscles. I tried on every black silk shirt, burgundy wine jacket and sapphire blue bolero they had and, I feel really ridiculous to say this, but they were picking out clothes that made me look like the amount I was spending for them. None of it went with the black eye that was already fading to a pale yellow, but there was one button up that was a pale cream made of velvet that was so perfect for me that I could have sworn it was tailored to my frame.

Somehow, during that trip, I had not thought about Hector or my life, just seeing their reactions to what I wore. I think that was their goal, and the goal of women's shopping sprees. To forget the reason you're spending a day among friends and doing something that was solely about making yourself feel good in your body. I could be wrong, but probably not.

Monday I was dressed to kill. I wore that cream shirt with a caramel brocade silk vest with gold and emerald buttons, chocolate silk slacks and caramel shoes. I had gotten my longish hair cut Saturday. It was still long in the bangs that fell almost into my eyes but got shorter and a bit spiky in the back. I admit I liked the way I looked when I gazed into the mirror. The colors brought out what little tone I had to my skin and set off my brown eyes like glistening gems. When I left my dorm room every guy and girl in the hall stared. They were used to seeing me in jeans and t-shirts and my tennies. It would have been perfect for a slow mo moment with every head turning to follow my progress to the stairs and down them. I passed Kai in the hall and he looked at me with a big grin on his face. “Look out ladies, Justice is hot today.”

“You know it,” I said and gave him a high five. I swung open the doors and stepped into the morning sun. God I know I looked good because I heard footsteps behind me as the girls dorm spilled out every occupant to gawk and a few even whistled and asked for my number, if I was single and whether I wore boxers or briefs. I stopped and turned, giving them my most heartbreaking smile and said, “I'm in the student directory, I am single, and neither. I prefer bikinis.” The girls screamed and cat called and I ate it up...on the outside. There was only one person I wanted to impress.

I just walked by the Crowd as if I did not know them. “Holy shit!” said Steven. I paid him no mind as I strolled across the quad with one hand in my pocket like I was in a fashion show and I was the main event. Sarah and I planned it all out. She and Hector would be sitting on the benches as I walked by.

“Let him get a good look at what he's giving up if he does not wise up.” Her words. I saw them sitting as planned and I got a good look at Hector before he saw me. He had been thinking. And not eating, not sleeping, had not shaved which showed he could grow a better beard than I could. He looked like pan fried hell while I looked like rotisserie heaven. I schooled my features as Sarah's jaw dropped right on cue. “Now that is hot,” I heard her say to him. She was honestly impressed too, no acting there. He turned to look and his eyes just about bugged out of his head. I think he stopped breathing.

“Hey Sarah. Nice dress.” It was nice. I had picked it out for her knowing it would look good on her voluptuous body.

“Thanks, Justice. You look good.” I smiled and just walked past. “Doesn't he look good,” she asked Hector in what was not meant for my ears.

“Am I dreaming or is he...fuck he looks...” I had my answer. He was speechless, a very rare thing for him. Every woman's head turned, even a few I knew were lesbians, which Hector saw every one of them. “Sarah...”

“Just tell him. He's actually great once you get to know him and forget what he was like.”

“I couldn't talk to him now. I can't even stop staring at him how would I get a word out.” I grinned to myself. Mission accomplished. “He would not want to associate with me now anyway. I look like hell and...fuck.”

“Give him the chance.” I turned the corner and lost the rest of the conversation.

When I sauntered into drama everyone had either seen or heard about my makeover and were waiting to see it close up. The set had been in place for the dance scene and the guys had to choose partners. There were no lines in this, no set partners outside of the main characters, so I walked right up to Hector and Sarah and held out my hand to her. “Do you have a partner yet? If not may I have this dance?” I ignored Hector until she took my hand. “You need to either grow it or shave it,” I said in the same tones he had been using on me and escorted Sarah to one of the spots for the dance.

“You are doing very well, Justice. He is so stunned he's been quiet all day.”

“Well? My stomach is full of knotted butterflies and I know you can feel how sweaty my palms are. What if he doesn't talk to me?”

“He will. Just give him some time.” The music started and we danced. I was a good dancer before that weekend but Sarah and Meg had me better my skills. Sarah, for all her bulk, was so light on her feet and could dance circles around me that she made me look like I was the leading role and not just the deputy. Hector was not in this scene so he watched. I saw him. His eyes never left us for a moment. “You know he's...”

“Yup,” I replied, popping the P. When the dance ended I bowed over her hand and kissed it gently. She colored prettily. “Thanks for the stunning review too.”

“I see what a dramatic change you have made. He has too, but he's got nightmares to deal with while all I had was issues.” We went through it many times, me claiming Sarah as my dance partner for the play just by only dancing with her. “People will think we are dating.”

“I could do far worse than you, Sarah.” She smiled a genuine heartfelt smile and I returned it. “Maybe he'll get jealous and call you out for a cat fight over me. That would be hot.” She laughed and slapped my shoulder. Let him see us smiling and laughing and being friends.

Friday was the first time I gave him the opportunity to talk to me. Since he was not making the next move I was giving him to opening. I sat in the back with my laptop working on my skit. I was learning more and more every day and I kept refining the pace and blocking. I had not changed the dialog one bit, it did not need it, but the rest was still being worked out. “It looks much better now, Justice. I would say you will get an A.”

I looked up into those blue eyes with a grin. “You think so? I've had a lot to learn this semester and with Meg's and Sarah's help I think I'll actually enjoy this class.” I looked at him closely. He had sculpted his beard and he looked very nice, very sexy. The short hair framed his lips which were very luscious and full and called attention to them. “Nice beard. A little uneven on the left side, but once it grows in you'll have some guys checking you out.”

“Thanks.” I could tell he was wanting to say something to me, but he could not. I was still dressing in the outfits the girls had picked out for me and I would be until I wore the last one on February fourteenth. If he had not made his move by Valentine's day I was going to really be hurt and would grunge out for the next month. “How are your lines coming?”

“I have plenty of time for those.” His brows pulled down or a moment as he was about to tell me to study them but he just walked away. I sighed and went back to my skit.

It was the day before Valentine's Day and he had not said anything else to me, not even to tell me to study my lines, and I was giving up hope of his ever being my friend. There was only so much I could do and still retain what little pride I had left. I had done what I could to make amends, everything short of telling him I wanted to be with him, and there was nothing left to do. Almost nothing. I had one last ditch effort. I had signed up to deliver the roses and valentines all over campus and I had three surprises set up. Since the fund raiser was done through the student executive body, and Kai was in charge, I asked him for three specific deliveries. “Have a couple of ladies on the line?”

“No. I'm trying to get two people hooked up and the other is just a special friend.”

“Sure, Justice. Gimme the names...”

“Nope, I'll just take all of them for those people.” He shook his head but nodded. Step one complete.

I went to the cafeteria and found Seth sitting by himself because the other guys had class right then. Since I knew Seth's schedule I knew when and where to find him. “Hey little bro, I need your help.” He perked up. I had never uttered those word to him and he looked so over joyed to finally be asked that he almost was ready to jump over the moon. “There is this girl, and I want to give her a rose, but I don't know what to say to her.”

“You? Justice, you've had more women that I have. You've had more women than I know!”

“Yeah, but I've never felt like this before. I know lines, but I want something from inside and I can't get it out. What would you say?”

He thought about it. “I'd tell her she was the stars in my eyes, the beat of my heart, and the reason I get up in the morning.” My mouth actually dropped. Where had that come from? God it would work on the most frigid of women. Hell it was working on me because the way his eyes sparkled when he said it...he was just so adorable! “That bad?”

“No, I am so damn impressed. Could you write that on this? She knows my hand writing and I kinda want it to be like a secret admirer thing.” I handed him the card and he wrote it in a very neat, very small script. “You are the best, little bro. Thank you so much.” I gave him a guy hug and went off to the next part of my sinister plan.

I found Sarah just coming out of French class and rushed her. “Sarah, I need your help.”

“Sure.”

“I need you to write something on this card. When they deliver the flowers tomorrow I want it delivered to me so Hector thinks I've got a secret admirer. I would use my own handwriting but I write like guy.”

“You will be the death of me,” she said grinning but she took the card. “How mushy?”

“Like you think I'm cute and want to get to know me better.” She thought about it and then put down a few words. “You're a life saver.” I gave her a kiss on the cheek and went running off. I think she was stuck there for a minute in shock. I had one more stop to make and then I had to turn the money in for the roses. This would be fun.

Friday. Valentine's Day. Judgment Day for me. I had a gross of roses to deliver all over campus from 9am to 11am and I had to time it perfectly to catch my surprise victims in the class they shared. I walked in to math wearing my burgundy wine suit with black silk shirt and wine tie. I had been saving it for today. “It looks like someone is getting flowers,” I said and walked over to Seth. “Looks like you got one, little bro.” He went wide eyed as I handed him the red rose and the card. His smile was huge as he read it and looked up at me. “Don't ask, I don't know who sent it. The only other one in here is for you Sarah.” I went over and handed her a red rose and a card that said “You are the stars in my eyes, the beat of my heart, and the reason I get up in the morning. Your secret admirer.” She read it twice before she looked at me.

“I've been good, Justice.” There was more than a little whine in her voice.

“Yep. Here is your first clue. He is in this class,” I whispered to her. I left before she could ask for more. I had the biggest grin on my face. It had been totally worth it to see the looks on their faces. One last one to deliver and I had to hoof it over to the other side of campus to get there in time. I made it there with a few minutes to spare. Hector sat in the aisle seat next to the windows and I had to cross in front of the entire class to hand him the two dozen red roses from me. “You had to have class out here.” I handed him the card and then the roses. I made sure he was looking up at me when I handed them to him, trying to put all my feelings into my eyes so he would know they were from me.

@~To a wonderful man whose heart has stolen mine

and I hope it never gives it back~@

Your not so secret admirer

He looked up at me and back at the card a few times before I turned away and walked out of the class. I leaned against the wall outside and let out my breath. There. It was done. I had told him and I hoped he got the message. I had not made it obvious but he was smart and observant. I hope he got it...and I hoped he did not.

Drama came around and when I got there I saw one of the other deliverers there with an entire basket load of flowers. “Finally! Justice these are all for you.” I dropped my bag in a seat and looked at the six dozen roses. There were dozens of red ones, dozens of pink ones and a single white one. With them came a stack of cards, each one signed by a girl, or in the case of one pink rose, a guy named Joey. I knew six Joeys and I did not think it was any of them, but I could not be sure. Either way, I would not be looking for any Joey when I wanted a Hector.

“Thanks Stacy.” I saw a pink rose from Sarah and gave her a hug. But that single white rose was staring out at me. I looked at the card and then searched the hall for its sender. I found him sitting by himself and looking at me. The card was simple:

Truce and Peace, Hector

I went over to him with the basket in my arms and looked at him. “Cool,” was all I said and walked away to put that huge bouquet with my bag and removed my jacket finally. He had made his move and I was able to relax. Back to square one, but a new square.