Always You, Only You - 4. Chapter 4

Part 2 : The Party that Broke the Dam of Emotion

After binging on Director Park’s creativity for two days, Miki decided he wanted to meet Park Shin again. On his own terms, of course. So, he called all the people who owed him favors, to get Shin invited to the party on the card Suki had brought him. After all, Shin was coming to Tokyo to find investment partners.

Miki wanted answers.

Meeting Shin would give him that, but there was the insane need to make an impression too. Shin wasn’t the only one who had worked hard to make his name, make his company…see his dreams come true. Miki frowned.

He too had achieved what he wanted. He had…and had Shin stayed, they’d be living the life they’d both imagined. The future they’d both dreamed once.

Sufficient to say, madness does grow from heartache. One might not believe this until it happens, but first it was important to define madness. Doing what is not normal? What is unexpected? What he would think abnormal? Going to an investment party was normal, but going to see Shin…well that he considered madness. Madness because he was afraid one look at Shin and he’d throw himself at the man’s feet and beg.

Fuck it!

If there was hope, may be they could still live that life…Miki’s frowned deepened. What was he thinking? What if Shin didn’t love him anymore? God, not knowing was torture.

Miki dumped the last white shirt he had in his closet on the bed, and stepped back. White shirts, black slacks, blazers, three tuxedos, belts, more white shirts.

Miki headed to his bedroom door and flung it open.

“Suki!”

She came running holding a slice of watermelon in one hand a knife in the other. She stopped at the bottom of the short stairs staring at him.

“What?”

“Why the hell are you holding a knife?” Miki scowled.

Suki, perfectly dressed in a pretty flowery red dress, her face made up to perfection, standing there holding a dripping watermelon slice and knife, it was a ridiculous picture. Where the fuck had she gotten the knife?

“I was cutting up watermelons in the kitchenette.”

She stared at him as if the explanation should make sense.

When it was obvious he didn’t understand. Suki blinked.

“The small kitchen,” Suki said. “You have one.”

Miki blinked. He sincerely hadn’t known that.

“Explore your suite more, sir. You spend too much time in your study,” Suki replied. “What can I do for you, our almighty? You sounded hysterical.”

“I’m never hysterical,” Miki pointed at the mess she was making. “Find a place for that. I need your help.”

Suki grumbled under her breath and placed her watermelon and the knife on a small table by the wall. Miki waved her into his bedroom, impatient.

He led the way to his messy bed.

“I need a formal outfit,” he said, waving at the formal shirts, blazers, and suits on his bed. “Do something.”

Suki raised her arms as though she wanted to pull her hair out.

“I had half of these pressed and ironed two days ago. Why—

“Can you help me or not?” Miki asked. “I’m going to a party tonight.”

“The party you refused to attend?” Suki asked in surprise.

“Yes. I sent the RSVP myself,” Miki said. “I’m leaving in one hour.”

Suki turned to look at him. “I need a raise.”

“Can we talk about that after the party?” Miki asked.

“Promise me,” Suki said. “Tomorrow morning, first thing.”

“Yes, alright,” Miki waved to the mess on his bed. “What do we do now?”

Suki smiled.

“Now you let me do my job.”

***

Yes, he supposed having Suki to handle his problems was the only smart thing he’d done. One phone call from her and the well-oiled machine that ran the hotel worked for him. He’d never gotten around to visiting the barber that sunny day Shin’s logo assaulted him outside an electronic store. Suki managed to get that same barber to come to his suite, and in forty-five minutes, he was groomed, dressed and ready for the party.

The black town car Suki got to drive him to the private property in the suburbs of Tokyo pulled to the front doors of an exquisite house. Miki exhaled as he got out of the car, adjusting his jacket and slightly, he walked up the steps to the open doors.

“Mr. Hayashi,” the host of the party greeted him at the door, extending his hand.

“Mr. Ryoha,” Miki shook the man’s hand. “Thank you for inviting me.”

“I’m honored you changed your mind and decided to attend. You’ve made me the envy of the town by accepting my invitation. Everyone wants to know my secret for getting you in here.”

Miki smiled allowing Mr. Ryoha to lead him to the ballroom located to the left of the house. Ryoha Matsue was the owner of Ryoha Investments, the company Miki had worked for before he quit. Miki was loyal to the man, as without Ryoha he doubted he would have been as successfully.

“Mr. Ryoha, if you call, you know I will always come.” Miki assured the older gentleman.

Miki spent a few minutes chatting with Mr. Ryoha, then doing the rounds, meeting old and new acquaintances. He avoided any serious talk not wanting to be tied down. He wasn’t here to focus on business. No, tonight…he accepted a drink from a passing waiter, his gaze searching the crowd. Tonight, he was here because of Shin.

He sipped his champagne, and lowered his glass just as he spotted Park Shin.

Everything inside him stilled.

The strange dance of anxiety, eagerness and fear was familiar. He felt it every time he dialed Shin’s number with no response, or when he talked to Min and asked about Shin. Hell, he even felt it when waiting for email responses from Haesoo. The ripping disappointment after was always too much to bear. Seeing Shin now, Miki was reminded again of why he needed to recognize this as madness.

If he let Shin in again…God, if he let himself hope and disappointment followed, they might really find him standing on the top of Tokyo Tower about to throw himself off.

“Are you alright?” Shin asked.

Miki blinked, his hand shaking when he realized Shin was standing right in front of him.

For the life of him, his lips couldn’t form a response. His gaze too preoccupied with taking in the sight of Shin. How could it be possible for a man to get more handsome with time? Shin’s hair was combed back neatly, his dark eyes as captivating as Miki remembered. His gaze slid down Shin’s elegant nose, and rested on lips curved in a slight smile. The sight of it had Miki taking a step back. He exhaled and brought the glass of champagne to his lips. Taking a healthy sip, he curbed the urge to run.

“Miki,” Shin said, his tone gentle.

Miki closed his eyes, at the sound of his name coming from Shin’s lips, in Shin’s deep voice. So much deeper now…

My God…he couldn’t do this.

The room was too hot. His tie too tight. Miki reached up to tag on the tie around his neck. Sweat broke out on his forehead and he looked around the room. There were terrace doors straight ahead.

Placing his half-drank champagne on a table, Miki decided on escape. He walked fast, headed to the terrace doors. The moment he stepped out and the cool air hit him, he took in a deep breath and wondered how the hell he’d gotten so hot so soon after arriving.

Undoing the top button of his shirt, he headed to a bench set in a neat grass yard. Of course the Matsue family would have such a haven in the middle of a city with no space to spare. He sank on the white bench with a relieved sigh, resting his elbows on his knees. Goodness, seeing Shin—

“You look better.”

Miki looked up fast. He hadn’t realized Shin had followed him.

“Don’t look at me that way,” Shin chided, coming to sit on the bench too. “It makes me feel like an ogre. And I really need you to listen to me, Miki.”

“Why did you follow me?” Miki asked, his voice coming out in a hoarse whisper.

Shin didn’t answer him.

Miki realized he didn’t need an answer. Shin…at least the Shin he’d known in Seoul would follow him.

Miki stared at the grass. After all the fire that had burned inside him, demanding he come to this party, one glance at Shin and he was left speechless.

“I’ve missed you,” Shin said.

***

“You don’t get to say that to me,” Miki said, surprising Shin. “You really don’t, Shin.”

“What do I do? It’s the truth, Miki,” Shin said, taking in Miki’s angry eyes.

God he’d missed seeing those eyes light up. Miki was even more handsome than he remembered. So utterly exquisite, Shin wondered what Miki would do if he were to kiss him here.

His gaze dropped to Miki’s left hand and he sighed, when he saw it shaking again.

Before Miki could protest, he reached out and took Miki’s hand in his, hoping to still the trembling.

“Are you sick?” Shin asked, squeezing slender fingers. “You’ve lost weight since I last saw you.”

“How long ago was that?” Miki asked with a scoff.

“Miki.”

“I can’t do this here,” Miki said trying to pull his hand out of Shin’s hold. “I—I—,”

“I have a lot of things to say.” Shin refused to let go, shifting on the bench so that he clung to Miki’s hand with both his. “Apologies to make—

“You abandoned me, Shin.” Miki broke in, his voice harsh with emotion. “You wouldn’t answer my calls. I thought you would show up at the airport for sure, but you didn’t. When I got back here, I couldn’t get you. Min wouldn’t tell me where you were, and neither would your mom. You froze me out, Shin. Do you know how hard that was? No apologies can fix that.”

“Miki,” Shin squeezed Miki’s hand.

Miki’s eyes were bright with unshed tears.

“I came here wanting to know why you did it, but now I don’t want to know. I’m afraid it will hurt more than not talking to you all these years,” Miki said. “I don’t know that I can take it.”

Shin stared at where he clung to Miki’s hand. He had known it wouldn’t be easy to get Miki back. He’d been afraid the damage was too deep, too painful…still, he had worked too hard to lose out now.

Whatever the impact of their separation…Miki was here, right in front of him. He wasn’t about to watch him walk away.

Shin got up, not letting go of Miki’s hand. “Come with me.”

Miki frowned. “Where?”

“Somewhere you can yell at me, scream at me…all the things you have wanted to do, then you can forgive me.”

“I’ll never forgive you.”

“That would be tragic, Miki.” Shin pulled Miki to his feet. “I refuse to live a tragedy. I’m sorry I’m late coming to find you. So, let’s do what I say for now.”

Taking advantage of Miki’s shock, Shin led the way back to the ballroom. Never once letting go of Miki’s hand.

“What about your investors?” Miki asked, when they left the room full of elite businessmen and were in the foyer.

“You’re more important,” Shin said, walking with purpose.

Outside, a red sports car waited. Shin opened the passenger door, waiting for Miki to settle in, afraid if he left him to enter the car on his own, the man would run away. Closing the door firmly, he locked it and raced to the driver’s side. He pressed on the gas, taking off fast not giving Miki a chance to jump out.

“You always liked driving too fast,” Miki said, clinging to the door handle.

Shin smiled heading to his hotel. If it meant locking Miki up in his suite until they’d ironed their differences, then so be it. He’d made the decision the moment he spotted Miki walking into the room, smiling at an older man as though he owned the world. The blinding jealousy nearly gave him a heart attack. He had known then that nothing would keep them apart again. Fuck propriety, or his father’s expectations, he was all in now.

***

To Miki’s eternal surprise, Shin was staying at the Park Inn, the same hotel he called home. Shin gave him no time to protest, or escape. Holding on to his right arm tight, dragging him out of the car and into the lobby. They were in the elevator in seconds and heading to the tenth floor. Through it, Miki kept thinking he should just press the 6^th floor button and get off, but he didn’t.

His gaze remaining on Shin’s back: Shin’s shoulders broad and strong, elegantly framed by the white dinner jacket he wore. His hair so neat, Miki wanted to sink his fingers in and mess it.

He dropped his gaze to where Shin held his arm. He couldn’t bring himself to pull his arm out of Shin’s hold. This little and he was wavering…Miki swallowed hard.

The elevator doors opened, and then they were in Shin’s suite.

Shin pulled him into his arms the moment the doors closed. Miki clung to Shin’s shoulders, eyes closed when Shin’s lips covered his. The shock of it pleasurable, so mind-boggling, like an addict long denied, he fell into Shin’s taste, Shin’s heat, Shin. Everything Shin. Good God, how had he lived without this?

How had they lived?

Shin sunk fingers into his hair, tilting his head, his kiss turning brutal, almost punishing. Miki took it, opening his mouth for Shin, letting him in. His fingers digging into Shin’s jacket, holding on, his entire body lighting up.

Shin’s hands found their way under Miki’s shirt, and the feel of Shin’s fingers on his bare skin, caressing, stroking up his back had Miki moaning for more. He wanted to feel Shin on him…in him…

He gasped, opening his eyes, he shook his head.

“No.”

“What?”

“No.” Miki pushed Shin away, but the man locked his arms around Miki’s waist.

Miki panicked and they struggled, fiercely.

“Miki.”

“I don’t want this,” Miki said, his tone full of panic. “I don’t, Shin!”

He kicked Shin’s right thigh, and Shin let go with a groan. Miki stumbled back, tripping on his own feet, he fell on the floor, lucky it was carpeted.

Shin rubbed his thigh, glaring at him.

“What are you doing?”

“Stay away from me,” Miki held out his hand when Shin started to come to him. “Don’t.”

“Ask me anything else,” Shin said moving closer. He crouched on the floor. “Anything else, Miki.”

“Don’t talk to me either.”

“Why not?”

Miki shook his head, wiping his mouth with his palm. The sound of Shin’s voice did things to him inside. Hell just looking at him, Miki looked away, staring at the red carpet, then turned to gauge how far it was to the door. He’d made a mistake going to the party. The reason? Well, he wasn’t strong enough to withstand looking at Shin, listen to him, then walk away.

No, at this rate, he was liable to fall into Shin’s arms and forgive him everything. Just so that it didn’t hurt anymore to be without Shin. Just so he didn’t wake up crying at how much he missed Shin holding him.

“Miki.”

“Was it easy for you?” Miki asked, refusing to look at Shin. “Not seeing me, not talking to me, was it easy?”

“No.”

Miki closed his eyes. Shin’s answer was what he wanted to hear. And because it was, he dared not believe it.

“It must have been easy,” he murmured.

“No it wasn’t,” Shin said, moving closer.

“It had to be,” Miki said, sure. “I could barely function with worry. I called you so many times, if I’d been able to fly back to Seoul then, I would have. To come find you, but you—

Shin grabbed Miki’s arms and shook him hard.

“It was a fucking nightmare, Miki.”

“What was a nightmare?” Miki demanded. “You not answering my calls? You telling Min and Haesoo not to talk to me? What part? Huh? Did you listen to my voicemails and think me an idiot for missing you? Did you?”

“No.”

Miki sighed and finally met Shin’s dark eyes filled with shadows he didn’t understand.

“I hate you,” Miki said then. “I loved you so much, that I hate you.”

Shin gasped and let go of him. He sat back on his haunches, his shoulders slumped.

“My dad found out about us.” Shin spoke into the ensuing silence. “One of the coffee house employees took a picture of us kissing in the laundry room. He used the picture to blackmail my dad, wanting money. I didn’t know until the day you were leaving.”

Shin’s confession did nothing to curb the resentment inside him. They’d both known their love was never going to be easy. They had too many opposing variables, Miki had always assumed Shin understood that. His own parents would disown him if they knew about Shin.

“Haesoo knew about me loving you,” Shin said, sitting on the floor too. He pulled off his tie and undid the top two buttons of his shirt. He threw the tie to the side. “I thought my father wouldn’t care too much, but I was wrong, Miki. I was so wrong.”

Miki refused to comment when Shin glanced at him.

“Dad got men to pick me up from university that day. He took my phone, and locked me in the house for two whole days. It wasn’t that I refused to answer your calls, but that I couldn’t, Miki.” Shin shook his head. “After you left, my dad let me out. He handed me my phone and told me to forget about you. I spent hours listening to your messages.”

Miki closed his eyes remembering the pleading messages he’d left, the teasing ones, the angry ones, the defeated ones at the end. When he arrived in Tokyo and after checking his bank account, he’d dialed Shin begging him to answer or he was going to rob someone for money to go back to Seoul.

“Listening to you was fine torture,” Shin said now. “When I was done going through your messages, I went to Dad, got on my knees and begged him to let me be with you. His response was to collapse with a stroke. I rushed him to the hospital, and the doctors saved him. When he woke up, the only promise he asked of me was not to see you again.”

Miki felt tears prick the back of his eyes. Shin, the filial son, would have tortured himself with the choice.

“The doctor said if we weren’t careful we could lose him to another stroke,” Shin dropped his head into his hands. “What was I to do, Miki? Haesoo stared at me, her gaze pleading and begging me to do as my father asked. I—

“He’s your dad,” Miki said, in a whisper, understanding Shin’s decision, though it hurt even more.

Shin dropped his hands on his lap and chuckled.

“Of course you understand me so simply. Min didn’t. He moved out of the loft after he graduated high school saying he didn’t want to be associated with me anymore. I changed my phone number because I couldn’t do anything for you, Miki. What promises could I give you? I couldn’t come see you, or promise you a future.”

“You could have told me what was going,” Miki countered. “What makes you think I wouldn’t have understood? Huh? Instead—

“I’m sorry.”

“I can’t listen anymore.”

Miki started to get up, but Shin scrambled to stop him. Miki gasped when Shin’s weight pressed him to the floor, so that Shin was lying over him and he had no choice but to meet Shin’s gaze.

“I never stopped loving you,” Shin said, the sincerity of his words so clear. “Through it all, I never once stopped loving you, Hayashi Miki. I thought about you everyday for five years. Even after my father recovered and I stayed with him taking care of him, watching him smile, I only thought of you. Dreaming of this moment when I would have you in my arms again.”

“Don’t do this,” Miki shook his head. “What am I supposed to do—

“Forgive me for letting go of you,” Shin said, burying his face into Miki’s shoulder. “I won’t ever do it again, Miki. I promise.”

“What happens if your father gets sick again, or even Haesoo?” Miki asked, afraid of giving in.

Sure if Shin kept holding him down like this, he was surely going to give in. His body, his heart, his mind wanted everything about Shin, but at what cost.

“You broke me, Shin. I won’t survive you leaving me again. I—

“I won’t leave you again,” Shin promised. “Miki, you have my word. I will never leave you again. I won’t, Miki. I’ll say it over and over until you start believing me. I’m sorry for leaving you. I won’t do it again. I promise.”

Miki felt tears slide into his hair as Shin repeated his promises over and over, and like the fool he was, he believed it every time. He clung to Shin and cried because his stupid heart belonged to Shin no matter what, always Shin, only Shin.

“Don’t cry,” Shin whispered into his ear. “Please, baby, please.”

Miki couldn’t stop it. Shin captured his lips in a kiss, tasting his tears. He held on to Shin, his sobs subsiding into sniffles, Shin’s comfort soothing the pain, taking it away.

Shin rolled to his back, taking Miki with him, so that Miki was now on top of him. Shin ended the kiss and used his palms to wipe Miki’s tears away.

“Better?” Shin asked, when Miki simply stared at him. “You must still love me to cry like this in front of me.”

Miki wanted to protest, say he had stopped caring, but then the chain he kept around his neck slipped and revealed itself. Shin gasped, staring at the ring hanging from Miki’s neck. Shin touched it, his lips curving in that beloved smile Miki remembered. The one that made his heart turn over. There was no lying to Shin, ever.

Shin brought his right hand up to cup Miki’s jaw and that’s when he saw it. Shin’s ring, still on his finger where he had put it. Meeting Shin’s gaze, he smiled. Why had he not thought to look for it?

“Can you never say you hate me again?” Shin asked in a whisper. “I can’t bear it.”

Miki chuckled and leaned to kiss Shin, a weight lifting off his shoulders.

****

Part 3 : Catching Up…and the Future

“You’re not eating enough.” Shin complained, his fingers tracing Miki’s spine. They’d moved to Shin’s bed. Miki slept on his stomach, hugging his pillow, his head turned to face Shin. Shin propped his head up, and continued trailing his fingers down Miki’s back.

“I eat.” Miki answered.

“You’ve lost weight.”

“I was never big to begin with.”

“You at least looked healthy.” Shin pinched the curve of his right butt. “The wind might carry you now if you stand outside.”

Miki scowled at Shin.

“I didn’t hear you complaining a few minutes ago. Stripping me like a nympho, you dragged me to this bed way to eager for this skinny body of mine.”

Shin smiled. “That’s a different matter.”

Miki bit his lower lip when Shin traced his fingers along his crack, sinking them lower so that those seeking fingers found his sack. He moaned, arching into the touch.

“I’ve missed that,” Shin said, leaning close, his gaze on Miki’s lips. “I love the way you moan when I touch you.”

Miki met Shin’s wicked gaze. “How many have you touched like this?”

Shin’s fingers cupped his sack, and Miki shifted his legs, parting them to accommodate Shin’s maddening exploration.

“Will you rage at me in jealousy?”

Miki moaned when Shin moved his fingers to his crack again, his thumb tracing his entrance.

“Should I?” Miki asked.

“Depends,” Shin shifted, kneeling on the space between Miki’s open legs. His hands on Miki’s hips, he urged him to his knees, and pressed a kiss on Miki’s puckered entrance. “How many have you let touch you here?”

Miki buried his face in the pillow when Shin licked that most intimate spot. His cock hard, he moaned louder when Shin sunk two fingers into him, then three. Shin stroked in hard, fast, teasing him. Then Shin withdrew his fingers, and Miki moaned his protest.

“How many, Miki?”

“Must you ask?” Miki asked when he felt Shin’s cock press against him.

He arched his back, shifting back, wanting Shin to enter him. It had been so long, so long, he needed…needed to feel Shin inside him again.

“Does that mean you’ve had someone?” Shin asked, his fingers tightening on Miki’s hips.

“I’m not a monk.” Miki said, annoyed that Shin was teasing him. “What about you? How many have you taken?”

Shin cursed, and in the next instant entered Miki with a punishing stroke. Miki gave a harsh cry, the invasion too new and welcome at the same time. God, he’d forgotten how huge Shin felt inside him, how delicious the warring waves of pleasure and pain could be. Shin stroked into him hard, fast, his length sliding deep inside him. Miki met each stroke, bliss growing with each one, fuck, he’d missed the way Shin took him. Shin always knew how to touch him, how to drive him to the edge so fast, he was clamoring for that sheer wave of ecstasy.

Miki bit back a scream when he felt Shin’s cock graze the knot of pleasure inside him. When Shin hit it again, and again, he gave up on hiding his screams and gave in to the searing pleasure. Then Shin was coming inside him, the feel of his hot seed inside him drove Miki to his own ecstasy.

Miki collapsed on the bed, smiling when Shin rested on his back, still inside him. They were both panting hard, then Shin swept Miki’s damp hair away from his face and pressed a kiss on Miki’s temple.

“Was I better than whoever you let touch you?” Shin asked.

Miki opened his eyes then. “Yes.”

“So there was someone?” Shin asked, his tone too quiet.

Miki nodded. “It was superficial, Shin. I never let him in as I do with you.”

“Did you let him fuck you?” Shin asked.

Miki sighed. “No, I didn’t let him fuck me.”

“Did you suck him off?”

“Shin—

“Did you?”

“Yes.”

Shin cursed again. “When?”

“Months ago,” Miki replied. “What about you? How many, Shin?”

Shin kissed his shoulder and got off him. Miki mourned the loss of Shin’s heat on his back. He watched Shin get off the bed and go into the bathroom. Minutes passed, then the toilet flushed and Shin returned holding a small white towel.

Miki closed his eyes when Shin proceeded to clean him up thoroughly. Shin didn’t talk through the process, instead getting a fresh sheet from the bathroom. He urged Miki off the bed, handing him a fresh pair of boxers.

Miki took them and wore them watching Shin make the bed in silence.

“Are you mad at me?” Miki asked, sitting in the closest armchair. “Like I said, it’s not like we’re monks. I didn’t think we’d see each other—,"

He stopped.

Shin pulled on pajama pants and sat on the now neat bed to look at him.

“There’s been four for me,” Shin said. “The last one was three months ago. I cared for none of them.”

Miki nodded and stared at the floor.

“I’m clean.” Shin continued. “Health check-up last week.”

Miki sighed.

“Knowing is good. We were in different places—

“Promise me it’s only me from now on,” Shin cut in. “I know it’s unreasonable, but I feel like I might kill that man you sucked off.”

Miki glanced up then, annoyed. “Should I say the same for the bastards you’ve apparently fucked.”

Shin stared at him, then chuckled. “God, it makes me so happy to hear you sound so jealous.”

Shin stood and pulled the covers back. He slid into the bed, moving to make space. He patted the space next to him and Miki got up and hurried to join him. Shin covered him and pulled him close into a tight hug.

Miki pressed his ear to Shin’s chest. He closed his eyes, listening to Shin’s heartbeat. He'd missed it so much.

Taking in a deep breath, he asked, “Your dad?”

“He’s doing better. My mother has convinced him to move to Jeju Island for a while. It will give me some freedom, not having to see him everyday.”.

“What about Shinjiru Coffee?” Miki asked. “Who takes care of it?”

“Hojun is running it, until Min can take over,” Shin said. “Speaking of which, in the morning, can you call Min for me? Tell him I made it right between us. That punk is so loyal. He hasn’t talked to me with civility since I broke your heart.”

Miki smiled. “We’ll make the call together.”

“As for my dad,” Shin sighed. “We have to be careful. I don’t think he’ll ever come around.”

“Don’t worry, my parents are not any easier,” Miki said, tilting his head up to meet Shin’s gaze. “They’ll never understand us. I might never be able to introduce you to them as more than my good friend, Shin.”

Shin exhaled and pressed a kiss on Miki’s forehead.

“I understand,” Shin said holding him close.

“You left a roomful of investors at the party,” Miki said, once again listening to Shin’s steady heartbeat. He’d missed it. “Will your company be alright?”

Shin groaned. “Not really. We need the money to break into the Japanese market.”

Miki closed his eyes already making calculations. He was tied up in a few places, but there were people he could talk to.

“I can help.”

“Miki.”

“Let me help you,” Miki said, holding Shin tighter. “I want to.”

“How?” Shin asked.

“I’m not without means,” Miki smiled. “While you’ve been building your company, I was working hard too.”

“Tell me everything.”

None of them noticed the time, caught up in a world all their own. Miki told Shin about his exploits in the past few years. He talked about his parents, Nobu and his sister. His nephew and niece. Shin told him about his movie, the artists HayaShin managed, and the future he hoped to create for the company. They talked and laughed through the night, neither noticing the sun rise, or the sunny day that followed, not even when it was night again.

They made love, called for food when they got hungry, talked some more…never once leaving Shin’s room.

Miki’s phone buzzed on the coffee table. Shin sat on the couch, with Min lying over him, both of them reading different parts of the morning paper. Miki reached for the gadget absently, turning on the hands free feature.

“Sir?” Suki sounded panicked.

“Calm down,” Miki said, placing his newspaper on the coffee table, not moving from his comfortable spot. “What’s wrong?”

“You haven’t come home in two days, Sir,” Suki exclaimed. “Where are you? I’m worried.”

“I’m fine.” Miki was amused by her worry.

“Mr. Ryoha called, he wanted to see you, but you weren’t in. Your dad wanted to see you as well. There is a whole list of missed appointments. What do I tell them all?”

Miki sighed and looked at Shin. One glance and he knew Shin didn’t want to end their time together just yet. Miki glanced at the date on Shin’s phone.

“Suki, let everyone know I’ll see them tomorrow morning,” Miki said.

“Okay, but where are you?”

“Exactly where I want to be,” Miki answered. “Also, compile a dossier on HayaShin entertainment. You know what to do.”

“Yes Sir.” Suki ended the call and Shin dropped his newspaper on the coffee table too.

“Who is she?”

“Suki,” Miki answered, reaching for his paper.

He blinked when Shin took it away from him and dumped it on the floor.

“She sounds overly fond of you,” Shin said, shifting to his side, allowing Miki to lie on the couch. Shin pinned Miki on the couch. “Do you like her?”

Miki sunk his fingers into Shin’s hair and tugged, messing up the unruly curls. He loved Shin’s jealousies.

“She’s good at what she does,” Miki said. “I’m sure you have one too.”

When Shin lifted his brow, Miki smiled.

“An assistant you can’t live without.”

Shin pressed a chaste kiss on Miki’s lips.

“I want to see your place.”

“Seeing this suite, is like seeing my place,” Miki said. “I have made no attempts to make a home, Shin.”

“Then move in with me,” Shin said. “After Father’s stunt, I’ve worked hard to build a place to call my own.”

“Move to Seoul?” Miki asked, remembering Hojun had once asked him what he thought of moving to Seoul.

Shin touched Miki’s lips with a finger. “Would you hate it?”

He’d lived the past five years hoping for Shin. Wishing that Shin would return to him. Now that he knew how hard it was to survive without Shin, the answer was pretty clear.

Miki smiled and lifted his arms above his head.

“Wanna go out on drive?” Miki asked. “We can use your fancy rental car.”

“Miki.”

“I’ll answer your question when we get back from our drive. You explored Seoul with me, let’s go out and explore Tokyo together.”

“Then, will you give me your answer?” Shin asked.

“Absolutely,” Miki said.

***

Miki and Shin ended up at the Sumida park. Walking with Shin along the paths, full of blooming cherry blossoms, Miki’s felt happiness so deep it overflowed. The longer they spent time together, the more sure he got about his decision. He felt no remorse about making Seoul his home. Had long made the decision years ago, which was why it was so hard to accept living on his own here in Tokyo. He dared not think what would have happened if Shin hadn’t come to Tokyo.

Shin stopped their progress with an arm around Miki’s shoulders. Shin lifted his phone, taking a picture of them fast.

“I’ll post it on Line,” Shin said.

Miki leaned on the rail watching Shin, it lifted his heart, healed it where it had cracked and shriveled up.

“What did you write?” Miki asked, when Shin smiled.

Shin turned the screen to him. Shin had captioned their picture, ‘My reason to live.’

Min’s reaction was immediate. ‘Finally!’

Miki laughed: throwing his head back and really laughing with happiness. When he caught his breath, he found Shin staring at him.

“God, you’re beautiful.”

Miki smiled and gave Shin his answer.

“I’ll go home with you.”

Shin gaped.

“I miss Min and Haesoo, Seoul too,” Miki continued.

“What about your family?” Shin asked.

“Seoul is two hours away,” Miki shrugged. “I can always visit them.”

Shin grabbed him and pulled him into a tight hug. Miki gasped, looking around them to see if anyone would notice. No one did, or cared. Not that it mattered. He’d long thrown his lot in with Shin. So, he closed his eyes and held Shin too, finally breathing easier.

“I love you,” Shin said.

“I love you too,” Miki said.

****

Miki’s decision to move to Seoul once again shocked his parents, though they didn’t protest as much as the first time. He brought Shin along to the small family lunch at his parents’ house. When lunch was over, Miki made the announcement to his family. The excuse he gave was that he and Shin were going into business together. Shin helped, making the offer solid.

Miki’s siblings and father took the decision in stride, Miki’s mother though was a bit skeptic.

She pulled Miki to the kitchen, leaving Shin to answer the family’s questions about Seoul. Claiming she needed Miki to help her clean up the dishes. Instead, she made Miki sit at the kitchen table.

“You found something in Seoul,” she said.

Miki met her gaze surprised. “Yes, something important.”

“I figured,” she said, with a nod. “You haven’t been happy since you came back. Not when you graduated, not when you found a job, not when you quit to do your things. I worried. You haven’t been happy until now.”

“Mum.”

“Does it have to do with Park Shin?”

Miki took her hand and squeezed. There was worry in her eyes. Worry for the choice he was making.

‘I’ll be happy with him. We’ll have a good life together. He loves me.’ He wanted to say all these things to his mother and she would give him her blessing. But, he knew it would only make things harder on her.

“He’s a good man, Mum. Don’t worry. I’ll visit often,” Miki said.

His mother smiled and patted his hand.

And, that was that.

He’d kept his life so compact, that the only thing he needed to pack were his clothes. He met with Mr. Ryoha, and between him and Ryoha, Shin got the investment he needed for HayaShin. During his meeting with Mr. Ryoha, Miki also secured Suki a position with Ryoha Investments.

Suki was happy, while the pay was less than what he’d offered, she had the opportunity to rise higher. Gain more experience. With Suki settled, Miki was free.

Their flight to Seoul was on a Friday. Their luggage was handled by a porter and taken downstairs. Shin walked with Miki, carrying both their carryon bags, passports and tickets. Miki paused at reception to finish checkout of his long term stay.

When it was done, they took a taxi to the airport.

“Are you nervous?” Shin asked when they were in the lounge waiting to board their flight. “Will you miss Tokyo?”

Miki glanced at Shin.

“Not as much as I missed you, Shin. I doubt there is anything worse than the torture of not being with you. I never want to experience that again.”

Shin tagged on his ear.

“Then let’s go home.”

Three hours later, Miki was engulfed in a tight hug.

Min had come to the airport to meet them. He jumped on Miki the moment they spotted each other.

“Oh my, you’ve gotten stronger,” Miki said, rubbing Min’s back. “How have you been kid?”

“Missed you so much,” Min said, his voice muffled in Miki’s shoulder. “I was so worried you’d never come back.”

“I’m back,” Miki promised. “Wanna let go now so that we can go home?”

“Not yet,” Min said, still holding him tight.

“Let go of him, Min,” Shin complained, trying to pull Min off.

“Shut up, you’re the reason he was gone so long.” Min grumbled, then reluctantly let go of Miki. “Miki, did you make him grovel?”

Miki chuckled, glancing at Shin. “Should I have?”

“You should have,” Min insisted. “If you didn’t, I’ll help you.”

“You have a very vicious side,” Shin told his brother. “Come on, I’ll drive.”

Min helped them with their suitcases. In minutes, they were on the highway, headed to Shin’s house.

“Who is staying at the loft?” Miki asked when they didn’t head to Itaewon. Glancing on the onboard navigation, it seemed their destination was Pyeongchang-dong.

“Hojun’s rented it out to a family with two kids,” Min said.

Miki glanced at Shin.

“Min is staying at home with Dad and my mum. He is responsible for it all,” Shin answered before Miki could ask. “I wanted to concentrate on taking care of HayaShin.”

Miki glanced back at Min.

“I heard you are going to run Shinjiru Coffee.”

Min shrugged. “Means I get to have a coffee whenever I want. You can come along too.”

“Still spoiled,” Miki said.

“Not like you’re going to be,” Min said. “This guy, while he’s been acting like a douche, he has managed to own a rather nice place. Going on about how it is going to be your home. I’m envious.”

“You can move in too, at anytime,” Shin offered. The tone of his voice sounded as though he’d offered before and been turned down.

“Only if Miki asks,” Min said with a scoff, sitting back.

Shin turned a pleading gaze to Miki.

“Min,” Miki said, shifting to stare out the windows. “I bet you miss eating omelets.”

“Will you make me one later?” Min asked. “I have a project to finish.”

“Only if you let Shin move you into the house.”

“That’s blackmail,” Min complained.

“Well?” Miki asked.

“How do I get around?” Min asked.

“I’ll drive you around,” Shin said.

“No way,” Min shook his head.

“He’ll get you a car,” Miki answered, smiling at Shin.

“Sweet,” Min sat forward. “Miki, you’re here to stay right?”

“I’m wondering if I made a good decision,” Miki said as Shin pulled into a quiet neighborhood. Shin drove a few minutes then stopped in front of a black gate.

“Why are you wondering?” Min asked, poking Miki’s shoulder with a finger as the gates slid open quietly.

“It seems I’ve acquired a child in the process,” Miki teased.

Min wrapped his arms around Miki from the back.

“I’m glad you’re here. Please don’t leave again. Shin will be unhappy.”

Shin stopped the car in front of a handsome three-story house, that boasted aqua-glass on the east side. No doubt to let in the sun. Secured with a high wall on the outside, with a live green fence on the inside. Miki could already imagine having friends over for a barbeque on the gorgeous lawn.

Min got out of the car first.

“What do you think?” Shin asked.

Miki caught the slight strain of nerves in Shin’s tone.

He reached out and took Shin’s hand right hand.

“I love it already.”

Miki fell in love with Shin’s house, their home now. They spent a few hours exploring, when they got hungry, the went to the large spacious kitchen. Shin and Min helped him cut up vegetables and they made omelets. They ate and then Min had to go back to the city to finish his project at school. Shin handed him the keys to his car.

“What about you?” Min asked. “Don’t you need to get to the office?”

“Not today,” Shin said, nodding to Miki who was cleaning up their dishes at the sink.

Min laughed and left.

“So,” Shin said, when they were in the living room.

Miki stood by the windows, staring out into the lawn, and the gardens that needed tending. Miki turned to face Shin, leaning on the glass.

“So,” Miki said, when Shin came to stand in front of him.

“We’re home.” Shin kissed Miki’s forehead.

Miki wrapped his arms around Shin’s waist and pulled him close.

“We are.” Miki smiled, meeting Shin’s gaze.

“Happy?” Shin asked.

“More than I can ever say,” Miki said leaning up to kiss Shin.

Their kiss was sweet…marking the beginning of their lifetime of colorful adventure. Miki couldn’t have asked for more, but then Shin held him tight and his heart squeezed tight, happiness overflowing. As it always did with Shin, and only with Shin.

***

Fin