Pieces and Fragments - 3. treasure

There is a child deep within me
A frightened
battered
bruised
beaten
raped little boy

He is terrified of me
Though I have offered him comfort
compassion
understanding
safety and love

he will have nothing to do with me

See, in my much-less ordered past
I blamed everything on him
I screamed obscenities in his face
Riled against everything he was
Even blaming my present on him

I have apologized
I have plead with him
cried with him
and in his darkest moments
I’ve cradled him in my arms
Until he realizes where he is
and dashes off
to his corner
in the dark, damp basement

So I sit, cross-legged on the floor
at the opposing corner
of the room
in the light
so he can see me at all times
and I wait
and pray that someday he will see me
as I am
not the monster he expects

and more so
so much more so
that he will see himself
as the most priceless treasure
I have ever had the honor
to hold.