System of a Wolf - 15. Chapter 15

“How are you feeling Blake?”

Erith set a cup of cold lemon tea next to the mage. They were both sweating from the effort of clearing the yard. But their efforts had already borne fruit. Naia was busy digging out the rest of the pond. It would take a while to lay down the liner to keep the water in the pond, and Erith still wanted to add a few side pools. Maybe even a tiny bog for some cranberries. It was by no means a one day job. He fully expected to be working on the pond over the next week alone. Preparing the water for fish and adding in the moss would take even longer to set up properly.

But for now, the elf’s attention was on Blake. The mage had been rather quiet. He helped as much as he could, and they worked a lot faster with his magic, but Erith couldn’t escape the sensation that something was wrong.

“I’m okay,” Blake shrugged, sipping at the tea. “I’m still thinking about last night though.”

“Did… did Gara do something?” Erith asked nervously, trying to recall any kind of memory from the previous night. “I don’t really remember anything after putting the cookies in to bake.”

“You don’t?” Blake asked.

The elf shook his head slowly, and the mage looked back at the nekos working on the edges of the pond.

“I don’t think it’s good to tell you what happened right now,” he said quietly.

“Was it bad?”

Blake shrugged, before nodding.

“Yeah. I think. I don’t really know. But I don’t think you want your friends to hear about it. They don’t know about Gara, do they?”

Erith shook his head. No one at work knew anything about Gara. The wolf was an open secret; anyone who interacted with Gara had to be told he was a true wolf for their own safety. But it was not something Erith enjoyed telling people, and he generally just said he was a werewolf, keeping Gara in the backyard when he shifted.

“Yeah. I’ll tell you tonight, okay?” Blake said quietly.

“Well, it’s almost quitting time anyway,” Erith replied. “Maybe when they leave? It’s going to cause me no end of anxiety if I have to wait.”

The mage nodded as the backhoe shut off. Naia jumped out of the vehicle, fur damp with sweat. She waved Amber over, and the two nekos approached Erith, the elf offering them their own cups of tea.

“So, I think we got everything dug out,” Amber said, looking back over the yard. “We’ll bring out the liner tomorrow and get it all set up.”

Erith frowned slightly.

“I have work in the morning,” he said. “I won’t be here to help, and we all know you aren’t supposed to work without the owner of the house watching.”

The elf glanced at Blake, a thought forming in his mind.

“Hey Blake, you up for helping out again tomorrow? You did really well today,” he said.

The human shrugged.

“I suppose I could. But I should talk with Dr. Marin first. And I need to talk to you about last night too,” he added.

“Okay, well why don’t you and I sort that out tonight, and tomorrow when I go into work, I can let Amber and Naia know if they can finish out here,” Erith suggested, looking at the nekos. “If not… well, digging the pond out was the hardest part really. I could probably line it myself and set up the filters.”

“I guess that works,” Blake replied, glancing up at the darkening sky.

The nekos followed his glance, and Amber chuckled quietly.

“I think we should get out before Erith eats us,” she smirked.

“I don’t eat junk food,” Erith denied.

Blake snorted, shaking his head. Taking a sip of tea, his lips puckered slightly at the taste.

“Too tart? I can try to add more sugar to the next batch,” Erith offered.

“No, it’s okay,” Blake murmured, standing up.

Erith frowned as the man headed back inside, trying to figure out what it was that he had done so horribly wrong. Amber and Naia took their leave quickly, perhaps sensing the tension between the two. Or, more likely, they were nervous being around a werewolf right before the full moon. It was the last day of the full moon, and most werewolves were a lot calmer on the third night, but most people didn’t realize they’d burned through most of their energy by now.

Following Blake into the house, Erith cornered the man, frowning at his grimy appearance. He doubted he looked much better.

“I’m going to take a shower and clean up, then I’ll get started on dinner. Do you want anything special tonight?”

Blake shrugged, looking almost nervous around the elf. Erith let out a soft sigh.

“Can I have a hug at least?” he asked quietly. “I know I’m dirty, but I feel like we both could use a hug.”

The mage stepped forward, wrapping his arms around the elf. Erith rubbed the back of Blake’s head lightly, gently stroking his hair in tiny, comforting circles.

“Look, I don’t know what happened last night, but it was clearly upsetting. And I’m truly sorry for whatever it was, but I don’t remember it at all. I hope you can forgive me for whatever it was,” he said.

“I’m working on it,” Blake replied.

The answer did nothing to make Erith feel better, but he couldn’t do much about that yet. Pulling away from Blake, the elf looked at his mate. He had never thought he’d have a mate before, but there was no denying it; Blake was his mate. And whatever he had done, Erith needed to help him feel better.

“Can I have a kiss before my shower?” he asked.

Blake shook his head slowly.

“No. I’m sorry, but I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Erith’s heart sank, but he nodded his acceptance. Blake needed to feel better, and forcing the issue wasn’t going to help at all.

“Okay. I’m going to take my shower then. Why don’t you decide what you want for dinner, and then I’ll make it for you while you shower?”

The man nodded, heading into the bedroom. Erith followed him, gathering his clothes. Soon, he was in the shower, the hot water easing the ache of overused muscles.

Blake dug through the closet, searching for the prosthetics. Erith didn’t remember anything he had said the previous night, but maybe seeing Lynn’s tail and ears would help. Or it might bring the boy out and he would have to explain everything all over again. He really had no idea how this worked.

The thought occurred to him that he might not have been talking to Erith. Lynn had shown up; why couldn’t another alter show up instead of Erith? He wasn’t sure whether the thought disturbed him or comforted him. On the one hand, the fact that Erith could just vanish at any moment scared the mage. But the realization that maybe, just maybe, Erith hadn’t been trying to push sex on him the previous night made Blake feel better.

Either way, the sound of the shower shutting off prompted Blake to hurry. He couldn’t find the ears or the tail. They had been well hidden the day before, but now they seemed impossible to find.

“What are you doing in my closet?”

He jumped at the sharpness in Erith’s tone, backing out of the closet guiltily. The elf was standing in the door of the room, hair still dripping and clothes clinging to his wet body. Blake gulped at the sight of Erith’s muscles, fighting the stirring in his groin.

“There’s… I was… um…”

“Are you looking for the videos?”

“What? No!” Blake spluttered, his face burning at the thought.

He’d already shoved the box of flash drives and discs aside, tempted, yet too busy to really give thought to watching them again. Yet Erith’s look betrayed his doubt.

“No, I swear Erith, I wouldn’t look at them unless you gave me permission. I…”

He couldn’t just say he was looking for a neko tail. That would be disastrous. But there was no other defense for what he had done.

“Lynn. Do you remember Lynn?” he blurted.

The elf’s glare turned to shock, his entire body going rigid as he closed his eyes.

“How… how do…?”

“I met him last night. He’s one of your alters, right?” Blake forged ahead.

“No, she can’t be. She was just… She isn’t real,” Erith said uncertainly, as though he was trying to reassure himself.

“She’s a neko, and she said she needed a tail. There’s a tail and ears in your closet somewhere. I just wanted to show you, but I can’t find them. You put them away last night, and they’re just… I can’t find them anywhere. But I swear they are in there. I’m not lying, Erith.”

The elf stared at him as though he had seen a ghost. Blake didn’t understand. Erith knew about Lynn. Why didn’t he remember him… or her? It made no sense.

“I… I believe you.”

Erith shook his head slowly.

“I don’t know how. But I believe you.”

The mage let out a relieved breath, shivering as the tension fled from his body.

“I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have gone through your closet. But I know they’re in there somewhere.”

“Is… is that why you wouldn’t talk to me today?”

Blake shook his head.

“No… I met Lynn yesterday. He- she… asked if she could colour with me. And then said something about a tail. I came in here to find them, and when I returned, she was gone. I thought you were back, but now I don’t know. You were… talking to me about sex, about wanting to have sex with me.”

The elf flinched at the words, shaking his head quickly.

“No, I told you, I don’t want to have sex-”

“I don’t either. And I was trying to explain that last night, but you kept forcing the issue. Talking about how your body isn’t… just your body. It was confusing. I don’t want to do anything with you, not if you have a little girl in your head somewhere. The last thing I want is to have sex with you and then have her show up.”

Blake shuddered at the thought.

“That wasn’t me Blake. I don’t remember any of that, but I would never want to put you through that,” Erith said firmly. “We agreed that there was no sex, and that we’d talk to each other if our feeling changed. I certainly wouldn’t push you into having sex.”

“I asked if it was you, and you said yes. Or he said yes. I don’t understand this Erith. I don’t know what’s going on, and it’s scaring me. I don’t want to make whoever that was come back.”

“But how is Lynn…? I don’t… I don’t understand this either, Blake.”

Erith’s eyes closed, the elf leaning against the door. Blake watched him in concern, wondering if he needed to call someone. Maybe Dr. Marin would know how to help. He always knew how to help.

“I can feel Gara… but I always feel him…” the elf whispered.

His eyes snapped open, staring at Blake, and the man stepped back nervously.

“Erith?”

“I… I don’t know. My head feels weird,” the elf frowned. “Like it’s too full…”

He rubbed at his temple, his eyes closing again.

“Fuck… you’ve been going after him?” he muttered, startling Blake.

“I haven’t done anything?” Blake said in confusion.

“No, um… why don’t you go take your shower Blake? I need to figure this out, okay?”

Erith stepped past him, dropping onto his bed as Blake began gathering his clothes. The mage frowned at him, his eyes drawn to the noticeable bulge in the elf’s pants. Swallowing tightly, Blake hurried from the room. He wasn’t sure exactly what was happening, but he was pretty sure he couldn’t help here.