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About this blog

A place to open my mind and lay it on the table

Entries in this blog

 

We did something....

So, I would imagine that many members here wont remember who I am.  i've not been active for a while because... well, life gets in the way sometimes doesn't it?   8 Years ago last week, I started a relationship right here on GA.  I met Paya right here, and our friendship blossomed into something more.  I was in the UK, he was in the Czech Republic. We had a long distance relationship for 2 years, before finally moving to London together 6 years ago.   This is just a quick sto

Westie

Westie

 

New Beginnings

With apologies to Bleu, from whom I stole the title of this blog shamelessly from one of his comments....   So it has been three weeks in the new job. There are good things, there are bad things. Let's start with the bad things, because it is by far the smaller list. The main thing is, that however much more money and status this job has, it is considerably less challenging than my last one. While some people might relish the idea of a better paid job that is considerably easier, for me it

Westie

Westie

 

Endings

In a purely technical sense, as of now, I am unemployed. I left my employer this morning having handed in my ID card, blackberry, laptop etc and very much feeling the effects of my leaving party last night.   Obviously this is good news, not least because i will now have time to actually fulfil my obligations as a beta reader.   I now have a week of unemployment before starting my new role - I'm very excited

Westie

Westie

 

European Odyssey 2014

Phew. I'm exhausted. Right now, I am typing from our bed at Paya's mother's house, recovering from 4 hours of travel up through slovakia and into the Czech Republic, but this is but the latest in a long line of journeys over the last week or so.   We arrived just less than a fortnight ago from London having decided that the best use of our financial resources was to visit for two weeks instead of the usual one. The journey started our badly. Our plane was full of chattering girls from what app

Westie

Westie

 

Transition

By no means do I have a particularly complex job... but it turns out I do have a broad base of responsibilities. Until you start writing your "transition" documents, you don't realise just how "big" your job is.   I am writing four separate transition briefings. The first two are client specific, for my two major clients and are currently running at around 10,000 for client (1) and 8,000 for client (2). I have a "process and products" briefing to write detailing the processes I manage, the

Westie

Westie

 

Celebrations, resignations and and excitations :-)

Well, the good news first I suppose. I resigned this week from my job - and nothing has ever felt so good!! I am most definitely leaving my employer in a difficult position, but there is an extent to which they just need to "get over it" and there is an even greater extent to which I really do not care. I am of course fulfilling my contractual and legal obligations to the letter.   It's not as if they didn't get warning... they have seen the signs of my unhappiness for months. Through a cou

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Westie

 

Anniversaries and other things

I always love this time of the year. Coming into summer, it brings some very happy memories (as opposed to January-April, which generally has many sad memories for me).   The Ninth of May was our anniversary. FOUR YEARS we have been together, and for those of you who weren't at GA back then to remember, I'm gonna do a little recap.   We met right here on this very site. If you go back and read my old blog entries you will see that I was trying to act straight in real life, scared of my famil

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Westie

 

Culinary Experiments

Tonight is experimentation night. As many of you know, I have a few health complaints that are vastly improved by changes in diet. One of those changes involves cutting out certain foods altogether, and two of those foods are beef and tomatoes. This means that one of my favourite dishes - Lasagne - is well out of bounds.   Anyway, tonight, I have set myself a challenge - is it possible to make a Lasagne, without minced/ground beef and more challengingly, without tomatoes? Stick with me her

Westie

Westie

 

Yet another (narcissistic?) update

HI There. I've had quite a busy few weeks, and since you haven't been around for it (Where have you BEEN?), I thought I'd update you here.   Last time we spoke, i think I was looking at completing a major client software upgrade, and so I will start of from there. The awesome thing about this particular client is that their offices are back in my home region, which means I get to see my family. The terrible thing about this client is.... well, everything else.   Everything that could have

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Westie

 

Life update, into the new year and beyond

This year has been an awesome year so far, and we have some really great plans for the next 6-9 months that are really going to change our lives for the better. I am so STOKED for 2014.   For a start, I feel like I'm finally getting a grip on my health issues. The big thing here is that I'm using conventional drugs to control pain and stuff, but then I'm using some complementary therapies to help me reduce the reliance on those drugs and improve the condition for the better.   For example,

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Westie

 

An incredibly sad weekend

This weekend was particularly sad for me, but to understand just how sad and why, I have to go back a little.   First of all, I want to tell you about my dog. She came to us 13 years ago as the runt of the litter, and right from the start she seemed to have a charisma about her. She was also a born nurse. Just after she arrived as a puppy, I got sick and had to go back to my mum to recover, and the whole time I was there she never left my side. She cuddled right into me when my fever was

Westie

Westie

 

Really Awesome Writing - a kind of review

So, I make no secret of the fact that Mark Arbour's writing is what brought me here to GA. I started by reading the (as yet unfinished) "On the Mark" which as a matter of fact I still rate as one of Mark's better works. But then I moved on to Mark's "Nessun Dorma"... the series "Chronicles of an Academic Predator". It is by far the highest quality of writing that I have read on this site. When you consider how many other awesome authors we have here - you realise that being the creme de la creme

Westie

Westie

 

Shapshot July

So, just an update for those who want to know. For those that don't, I have the added pleasure that you rolled your eyes when you saw this   So Health..... Is fairly good. Comparatively. I seem better than I was, though I still have bad days. These tend to worry Paya and make me mad at myself - usually because they are triggered by my own lack of control. Since the start of May I managed to lose 6kg which is awesome. I have another 25 to go, but every step is progress.   In relatio

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Westie

 

Belgrade Bound

So today I am packing for a week in Belgrade - a trip that quite frankly I do not wish to go on. Firstly there is the heat, which is 34 centigrade at the moment - about 10 degrees more than I am comfortably with. But secondly, the trip is going to be downright unpleasant. Don't get me wrong - I like my colleagues - its just that they are not my first choice to spend any time with...   Anyhow..... see you in a week's time   West

Westie

Westie

 

My Health and The Three Day Apple Cleanse

So in my last blog, I mentioned that I was having some health issues.   One of the ways this manifests itself is with pain in the knees, hip, back and neck. As you can imagine, this makes it very painful to complete a range of day to day activities. Another thing this does is prevent me from exercising. Being overweight only makes things worse.   Anyway, as "conventional" medicines have failed to help, I have been looking at a number of other treatments - for example last year I spent £50

Westie

Westie

 

Life Update

So my blog is woefully neglected at the moment, which seems an opportune time to give an update on what's going on with me. Especially since this weekend has been particularly lazy - though I did find the time to rearrange my kitchen.   Firstly, on the work front, things are somewhat stressful. I work in quite a dynamic industry - IT Project/Programme Management - and in particular I work in a small subset of the industry that is very VERY fast paced and demanding. Travel is now more and mo

Westie

Westie

 

A more matured reflection on tha passing of a Legend....

So, yesterday I posted a rather emotional blog entry on the Death of Margaret Thatcher. She was and is a hero (heroine?) of mine, and to say that I was devastated yesterday was an understatement. Someone commented on that blog entry that they do not feel anywhere near the connection to any politician as I seem to feel with MT - but yesterday I did experience a genuine and heartfelt outpouring of Grief.   I remember very clearly the 31st August 1997, waking up to the news that Diana, Princess

Westie

Westie

 

Devestation (RIP)

I know that the death of a public figure shouldn't really have too much of an effect on ones emotions, but for me this is devastating.   For me this is more seminal than the death of Diana. It could only be worse if the Queen herself had passed.   Beyond devastated. It's genuinely numbing for me   RIP Margaret Thatcher. The "Iron" Lady. The last great conviction politician. She did what she believed was right (whether you agreed with her or not) and she didn't waver - even if it made

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Westie

 

Tomato.... in a fruit basket

I went back to my hometown this weekend. The purpose was twofold, firstly, Paya and I were visiting my parents for Christmas before we jet off to the Czech Republic for the actual event. Secondly, we had a large family gathering, where Paya would meet with the majority of my very, very large family.   The thing is, I always feel a little bit like "a tomato in a fruit basket" at family functions. Like the tomato, Technically, I belong there - but in reality it just doesn't feel right.   I

Westie

Westie

 

Contrasted living in the Big Smoke....

So, as anyone who has read my last two blogs (and a few sporadic ones before that) will know, I now live in London.   Now, as anyone who has moved from a rural idyll to the city lights will tell you, cities are a completely different beast in almost every aspect. Here are the things I love:   (1) A coffee house is never more than 5 minutes away.... (2) I can hold my boyfriend's hand and nobody cares (3) I can kiss my boyfriend in the street and nobody cares (4) In fairness re: (2) &

Westie

Westie

 

Shifting Focus

For this to make sense, i guess I need to start this sojourn of a blog around 10 years ago. I was in college (6th form college, to you guys out there in the US) and i had moved out on my own into a really terrible "bedsit" flat. My studies were just coming to an end and it seemed to me that my world had fallen apart.   I spent my entire childhood assuming that I would become an English teacher (actually, not true: I did briefly flirt with the thought of becoming a priest, and got a fair way

Westie

Westie

 

Community or not? (re-engagement)

So, something happened that has made me re-evaluate a few things.   When I first came to GA, It was because of Mark Arbour's stories. As I became a member I became active in chat, and then the forums. Between the Soapbox and MA's forum, I was if not prolific, then certainly visible. I even tried writing my own story - until I realised how painful reliving old memories can be. The story is still there, unfinished - its appallingly bad (honest, take a look, you wont get past the first few pa

Westie

Westie

 

The darkness within

It was truly evil. And while I'm sure that something buried deep inside me feels something akin to guilt, I have no regrets for what I've done. Should I feel shame? Probably. If there was any shred of humanity left within me, I would probably feel something - anything - for the people I have hurt. But I don't. It's just coldness inside.   I should start at the beginning, but I don't even know where that is anymore. How did I become this?   Picture this for me. The london undergroun

Westie

Westie

 

Now that I'm in London

So, as many of you know I now live in London, and Paya will be joining me in the next 2 months.   So, now one incredibly stressful part of my life is over, I wanted to make a list of things to do:   (1) Excel at my new job (which I start today) (2) Move Paya over here (3) Finish my story (did you know I have a story? the first chapter was put up 2 years ago, I didn't do much with it after that, but its still there) (4) Use my company provided gym membership regularly (5) Go to Paris (6)

Westie

Westie

 

Well, we had a plan....

Well, as many of you know, we had this plan. It was wonderful. I was gonna save up a nice amount of money, and on the 31st August this year, move to the Czech Republic to be with Paya. Its been month's in preparation already - discussions, plans, ideas - but late last week, in the space of three days everything changed. And it changed with a single email...   I was contacted by a recruiter who asked me if I would consider work in London. Apparently my areas of expertise have become more s

Westie

Westie

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