jkwsquirrel

It's senior year of school for Billy Roberts and his friends. It is a time of trials and challenges, but also hope. Billy must face his fears or risk losing everything he loves.

“In the sight of God and these witnesses, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.” Cheers and applause rose up from the assembled gathering of friends and family. Pastor Carl Stevens smiled broadly and asked the bride and groom to face the congregation. “Friends, it is now my pleasure to present to you for the first time Mr. and Mrs. David Bland!” I wanted to throw up. I wanted to throw up often, but at that moment a good

LOL! Six is all I've got planned! But never say never.

I'm just glad you're excited!

In Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, I skipped the songs. I enjoyed the world-building and descriptions, but the songs... Looking back, I could have skipped the whole Tom Bombadil section and been alright.

December 1, we commence.

It's coming together. Oh how delightful! It's those little moments of clarity that allow the words to flow and produce something so tragic and beautiful at the same time. Oh, this is going to be fun. War is coming... From: Commencement - Chapter Four - Like Father, Like Son "You did this to me, you son of a bitch! You fucking did this to me! ...All the times I wanted to be just like you, and now I am!"

Hey there! Just a little note to let you all know that I'm still alive! I'm enjoying the break from weekly chapter updates, and the batteries are recharging! I'm getting a bit of writing for Part Six of WAR done, but I'm not rushing it. Would you like a little sneak peek from chapter one? If so, have a look: From Commencement Chapter One - Paula's Pride and Joy “Brett, you know I want to but…” “But you can’t. Because you’re a gutless coward.” Brett stood up from the table. He shook his head in disappointment. “I’m not hiding anymore. Something has to change. Either you grow a set and stop hiding or I’m going to have to find someone who isn’t ashamed to be with me. I’m not doing this shit for another year. It’s humiliating.”

True. The idea of this is to encourage and improve, and all of Cole's words do just that! Everybody's very supportive around here. It's all appreciated.

But I did agree!

You'd have to work harder than that to offend me, my friend! Appreciation isn't a strong enough word for my thoughts on your words!

Well, Dustin got his revenge in the end. Brett's response to getting destroyed by Dustin is really his crowning moment. He knows what he did to Dustin was cruel and just added to Dustin's pain. That he was able to sincerely apologize to Dustin after everything that happened shows the kind of man he's becoming. His heartbroken moment staring at the blood stained carpet... His mother secretly paying for Dustin's rehab... His fake little "fuck him then" when Dustin didn't want any more visitors... All signs that Brett is no longer the boy he was in the earlier chapters. No one ever said growing up is easy!

Well well! If you haven't yet, check out the latest writer Improve and Encourage blog: Pretty cool. I'm very grateful to Cole Matthews for the time he took and the very kind thoughts on the story. Very appreciative! Now then... Melodramatic? My characters? Ha ha! Parts one and two were nothing. Wait until Brett tells Dustin he's glad his parents abuse him in part 4! I think some of you still hate me for that one!

I really appreciate this! Wonderful! Thank you Cole! I'm working on toning down the melodrama! Now I've got to get to work on JayT's story review!

So yesterday was focused on those innocent first few chapters. This time, I'll look at what I was thinking in books 3-4 when it comes to sex and love in WAR. By the time Part 3 came along, Brett was becoming a bit desperate to advance his relationship with Billy beyond what had become comfortable for Billy. In this book, Brett is the one who pushes the boundaries, while Billy reluctantly comes along most of the time. I already talked about the scene with Dustin. Dustin is way too aggressive for Billy. Though Billy is intrigued by what happens with Dustin, he holds back and eventually cuts off the situation before it goes too far. Later, when Brett re-enters the picture, Brett finally convinces Billy to confirm their relationship's status, and Brett sucks Billy off for the first time. Two things; 1. Billy is willing to go all the way to orgasm with Brett, when he was not with Dustin. 2. Billy is entirely focused on his own pleasure in the scene. As the story moves along, Brett continues to push Billy's boundaries. He pushes Billy to have sex, but not so aggressively that Billy will shut him down. Billy is reluctant, of course, because he is afraid of losing control. Once they cross that bridge there is no going back. Billy is very tempted, and almost gives in at times, but he keeps holding back. Finally, Brett goes too far and does something that makes Billy way too uncomfortable and he freaks out. Though he tries not to show it, Brett is deeply hurt by Billy's rejection. Brett unloads all of his frustration on Billy, who remarkably doesn't fire back. Billy understands that Brett is not just some kid who is willing to suck his dick, but is someone who is deeply sensitive and who deserves respect. In part 4, the inevitable showdown between Brett and Dustin happens, and it is vicious. Billy sees a side of both boys that he is disturbed by. Brett uses his relationship with Billy to make Dustin angry. Dustin crosses the line and attacks Billy physically. The possibility of any kind of love triangle is shattered. Billy cannot be with Dustin. They would be toxic for each other. Dustin spirals out of control after that incident. Brett comes clean on what he's been hiding from Billy and begs for forgiveness for taking Billy's love for granted. At that point, the boys finally make love. It isn't a perfect scene. It just kind of happens before Billy has time to back out. Again, Billy is almost totally focused on himself in the scene. His mind is centered on how good his body feels, and oh yeah, Brett's there too. It's almost all about him. He even hurts Brett a time or two by being overly aggressive in his love making. When it's over, Billy is feeling like a stud, but Brett is changed by the experience at a much deeper level. Brett begins to feel frustrated that Billy doesn't seem as affected by the encounter as he is. Brett feels something has changed between them, and Billy is oblivious. Billy remarks that Brett knows how to make him feel good, but he doesn't seem all that inclined to do the same for Brett. He just goes into beast-mode and if Brett enjoys it that's good, just as long as he (Billy) gets off. Brett's frustration builds until he finally snaps on Billy. In the midst of their reconciliation, Billy finally comes to understand that he has been taking his boyfriend for granted. It is then that Billy decides to put Brett's pleasure ahead of his own, symbolized by his asking Brett to top him. Even when he tops Billy, Brett's focus is on Billy. Brett teaches Billy what it means to be a good lover. It's not about one's own needs, but about the other person. Brett takes pleasure in pleasing Billy, and through their love, Billy comes to understand that as well.

Yes, and sometimes Brett would go too far, like when he freaked Billy out when he went a little lower on him than Billy was expecting. The first kiss was Billy's early crowning moment. He conquered his fears for love. Awwwww! There were definitely connections between the two scenes of Billy jerking off with Brett and then with Dustin. Dustin was far more aggressive sexually than Brett was, but more guarded about his true feelings. Brett was willing to tell Billy everything, but he kept his hands off until Billy was ready. Dustin went right for Billy's dick, but was unwilling to share even his shallowest of feelings, always being guarded and defensive. Billy was willing to go further with Brett because Brett was able to understand what Billy was ready for. With Dustin, Billy got taken by surprise and ended up way over his head. Once he realized what he was doing, he stopped Dustin from going further. Of course, a frustrated Dustin then ended up over his head as well when he began his new career in the park. If Dustin hadn't been so aggressive, Billy might have been more willing to explore with him. It just shows some of the difference between Dustin and Brett. The hyperactive one ended up being more patient because he was truly in love, and not just interested in getting laid.

Well, what shall we talk about today? How about... sex! Like that old song, "Let's talk about sex, baby..." Specifically, let's talk about sex and love in WAR. As you have discovered if you've read my story by now, sex is not a subject that I'm shy about. There's plenty of sex in the story if you're willing to wait for it. My goal in writing was to tell a story using the scenes between the boys. In this topic, I'm going to focus on the early books, Black Summer and Cold Winter. So starting from the beginning, Billy is following in his parents' footsteps, or maybe his impression of his parents; love life. He is shy, totally inexperienced, and a bit of a prude. He talks about masturbation as the narrator, but he's horrified to think that anyone would discover that he does it or even knows about it. Brett is more of a free spirit. He's not afraid to talk about it. He uses it to taunt Billy, to get him to loosen up. In the scene with the porno tape, it's Brett who instigates everything, and Billy has to be badgered into playing along. Brett is the first one to shuck his clothes, and he makes no secret that he is planning to enjoy himself whether Billy participates or not. Of course, we know that Brett is hoping that Billy will join him. Brett may not know exactly what it is he wants from Billy yet, but he clearly wants Billy to open up to him and trust him. That Billy is willing to go all the way to the finish line is a huge step for him. He's willing to share something with Brett that he wouldn't share with anyone else. Brett tests the boundaries right away, willing to touch, willing to taste forbidden things. The boys' interaction with their parents regarding sex tells us a lot about them as well. Billy is mortified that his mother walks in on him naked. He's further humiliated when his dad catches him in the act. Paula is quick to try to move on, to pretend it didn't even happen, but Brett brings it back up. When George catches him, Billy is so mortified he wants to run away, but George brings him back to the table, allowing his son to explore and grow, surprising Billy with his understanding of what Billy is going through. We'll see this dynamic play out later, when Paula would rather Billy keep his love life a secret, while George is willing to accept B&B's relationship, and in fact actively encourages it. In fact, George's ownership of the porno tape is itself a clue that Billy's expectations of his father may not be completely accurate. George encourages Billy to become comfortable with his body and not be ashamed of his exploration. The person who Billy thinks his father is doesn't quite match the reality of who George Roberts is. As for Brett, he's clearly not ashamed of his body once he starts to mature. He doesn't care if his mother sees him naked. He often hangs out around the house in just a pair of boxers. As the boys mature, Brett is clearly ready to explore his sexuality more quickly than Billy. He is willing to wait for Billy, but he is not afraid to push Billy further along. But Billy is not as much of a prude as he seems. He is the one who kisses Brett first. But it is important to Billy that they take their time and really get to know each other more intimately before they become sexual together. So they wait. Brett is willing to put off what he really wants because of his love for Billy. His patience in this area shows that Brett is willing to put Billy's wishes above his own. Well, that's enough for right now. If this proves to be something you folks are interested in, we can explore the later books as well. While I certainly don't mind a down and dirty sex scene, I try to make those scenes add to the story, and not distract. Got any thoughts? I'd like to hear them!

I don't think he would stand for that for too long. Temporarily, sure, but not forever.

Yep! It was a little foreshadowing of the highs and lows which are to come. That and Brett sneaking into Billy's bed at the end as well. Billy's truce with Paula is doomed to fail.

Thanks Jay! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

How dare you!?!! Just kidding! No, it's cool. I can see your point. It's hard to think of a close to 10,000 word chapter as rushed, but I had a lot to do in this chapter and didn't want to get too bogged down early on. Before I edited it, it was closer to 12,000 words. I thought it was a little too much, but perhaps my editing knife was a little too sharp. As for George, I think it's within his character to want Billy to be a responsible adult, and that includes being a good mate to his significant other. While George is an open-minded person, he's also a bit of a traditionalist when it comes to love. George has also come to see Brett as a second son, to the point that sometimes Billy thinks his dad likes Brett more than him. George knows that Billy could easily crush Brett's heart. Billy has two dangerous settings, hot-tempered destroyer and cold calculator. He can be seen as aloof, insensitive, and a sarcastic asshole. I just think George knows his son's behavior could do a lot of harm to Brett and he wants to show more maturity so he won't hurt Brett. I think he is very proud of the person Billy is becoming, and part of that is being a good partner.

You may be on to something! As much as he fights with his mother, he was so desperate to hide his true feelings because her rejection would have crushed him. I think Billy's running away from her was a preemptive strike, trying to delay what he thought was an inevitable rejection the he just couldn't deal with. "You can't hurt me if I hurt you first."

Thanks jaysalmn! It would have been cruel to kill George off at this point. I like a happy ending. Thank you for your continuing support! It's appreciated!

Thanks Israfil! I'm glad you noticed the parallel between the two scenes involving George and Billy. The first time, it was George reflecting on how much Billy had grown. This time it was Billy reflecting on how his father had grown old. Thanks for your encouragement!

Thanks Dahawk! I'm glad you've enjoyed the story! I appreciate your words of encouragement!