Boxerdude

LB, I did go to the yahoo forum and found the photo albums you posted. Thank YOU!! I can now picture things in my head much more clearly. The Elton John was was increadible. I wish I had seen it before reading that chapter, it would have definetly made a bigger impression on the situation. I also just wanted to make a note to everyone about how much I appreciate your postings. Sometimes, I feel that I say to much or come across wrong but thank you for reading. This story hits very close to home for me so I tend to pour my heart out. Mike (my partner) is only on chapter 15 so I can't talk to him about my thoughts or how I feel about the stroy so well I guess I pour them out to all of you! Keep your points of view because they are yours and don't mind me if I disagree or try to put a spin on things. Waiting calmly for chapter 21! Boxerdude

I have not figured out how you select and copy a someone elses comments yet, so I did my best. I believe this is from Afriendlyface, not good with the names yet: His comments on Connor and Ben's Kiss. I understand why you feel Connor betrayed Ryan and I even understand your point of view but, I don't think that it is realistic. Connor is learning self control little by little. I think he made a huge leap here in actually confronting the situation. Now, reality! If a kiss is going to ruin your relationship with someone, then you will have a lot of relationships! Gay guys like to kiss other guys! If I would have been upset, every time my partner has kissed another guy (yes even tongues) I would have been divorced 15 years ago. It is the trust in your partner, that they know when to stop that is more important. Connor knew when to stop! You may not agree now, but after you get a few years behind you, you will start to learn what is threatening to your relationship. You will also learn that you have to live your relationship in trust and love and can not harp on what might happen. Life is to short for that. Oh, I do need to add that yes I am in a monogamous relationship and July 1st will be 17 years. I am not trying to brag, I am trying to make the point that don

Well, LB has left us with a cliff hanger, and it seems to be quite obvious at this point. I must say, I think I had the most trouble reading this one because of all the emotions it brought up and out (even in myself) I even cried twice reading this one. I know that everyone is going to be pissed at Ryan. It was hard for me not to be, but I was proud of Connor. He is really becoming the "Rock." Don

If Toby goes, then I think the whole story is a bust. I think that there is more here than meats the eye. I have always had faith in Ryan as I am married to some one so similar to him. This story is about cause and effect. I think LB is having dificulty with this issue becaue it is a serious crossroad. Each of you have presented a great basis for you hypothisis. But, LB is the one who has to decide what he feels needs to be learned by this life lesson. It is fiction, but to each of us it is reallity as we deal with it day to day. I have my own opinion and have stateed it very clearly. I am most interested in where LB will go with this. I am really quite frustrated because I want to read chapter 20. But Can you imagine what LB must be going through. We all have strong opinions and he has to deside which way to go. The crossroads are very tough and all I can say is what ever happens I have the utmost respect of LB!! This most me the most difficult chapter to write as so many people are waiting on it and so many opinions have been voiced. LB, do what you think is right. The story is great and so is your writting. Boxerdud

Okay, no one has posted a comment in 2 days. How many of you are like crawling at the walls for the next chapter to be posted? I know that I am about to go mad because I want to know what the heck is going on. Please LB, post us a new chapter so we can have something more to chat about. This story is really a self fulling story and everyone of us wants to be apart of it. From my point of view, it seems like this is the longest time between chapters. I know that you have a lot to consider as you write this wonderful story, but the rest of us are going crazy trying to figure out what is going to happen next. I have absorbed myself with all the other postings, but nothing comes close to what you have written, so I guess I am waiting with baited breath to know what is going to happen next. God do I sound pathetic? Sorry, I just want to move on past what I already know. Boxerdude.

okay, budday has obokay, Buddha has obviously put all of us in a position to question many things. He has set us up for a situation that has many out comes. The twins, in my opinion are not that much of a mystery. Due to the nature of twins, we will soon enough know what is really going on. I just want to get to get to the nuts and bolts of Ryan and Connor. This relationship is at the center of the whole story and I want clarification on where everyone stands. I will not let myself get distracted from what is the most important par of this story. Ryan and Connor, I think that hey will either solidify their love for each other or it will be dissolved. That is the core of this story. I hope that there is a happy ending to this because there has been so much paid described. Nothing else really matters if Ryan and Connor can

James, thank you for the compliment!! I really appreciate it. I have been doing a lot of thinking and trying to come up with a story line. I have always loved to write but have never done much about it. I have an outline for a book I want to write but it is about "relationships" not just gay but all kinds. Kind of a self help kind of book for those who don't know how to put into words what they are feeling and or for those who maybe are missing the boat on how to have a relationship. It would involve straight and gay couples, Kids vs. parents, friends, and several other topics. Anyway, right now I am enjoying the psycology behind what LB is doing with his wonderful story. He really leaves a lot to think about and ponder. LB, please don't leave us in the lurches to long! I need my fix!!! Boxerdude!!!

Thanks to all of you! Like I have said before, I just try to throw out idea's that no one else has mentioned. I have thought of writing many times and I am not sure that it will not happen soon, but never forget what goes unsaid. Kitty, I really appreciate your honesty and integrity. I am glad that I am able to provoke a thought or two. That is what makes a chat room worth going back to. Thank you for not judging me but considering a different point of view. David, you will have to settle this issue with your next chapter or two! You are brilliant and I can not wait to see what gift you have been given. I hope to some day write a story that is as sharp and intelligent as yours. Thanks to all of you for inviting me into your world! I look forward to getting to know each of you better and I think we will as long as David continues to write stories that force us to look in side our selves and reevaluate how we feel and think. That is the true sign of a brilliant writer. Boxerdude (David)

Well, it seems that I read more into Mikey's family than what was written. I admit, it was probably due to my own personal experiences. I have rarely ran into parents who are "Up Standing" citizens and seem to be well educated reacting the way they did. ( Okay, don't read to much into that.) I am just stating that they are not Red Necks, they seem to be Professionals and most people with there standing in the community are a little more liberal with their children. They may not like it, or understand it, but most of them end up like Maggie, I love my children no matter what. I have never run into or seen this reaction from people who seem to be knowledgeable about life and society in general. Hence, my conclusion that an out side belief has influenced their reaction. Enough debate on that. I am finding it very interesting how everyone is looking at Ryan. Each one of you has a very valid point. I am not sure that I have a fully developed one myself. I just keep going back to Ryan being so calm when he found out that Cody kept wanting to kiss Connor and that they needed a break. He just wanted Connor to figure out what he wanted in life. Now let

Hi All, I must say that this group of individuals is a breath of fresh air. I am glad that each one of you are willing to voice you own opinion. I do the devils advocate thing to get thought provoking ideas out there. None of us know what the author will do, but each of us has our own feelings about the situation. I just like the idea that there are people out there willing to discuss possibilities. I do not know if I am right or wrong, I just have my point of view. Based on my personal experience with my partner ( who by the way has a very similar personality to Ryan) I think Ryan will be fine and I think Connor will make sure that he is as I have made sure my partner is okay. 17 years of experience can lead to a bit of insight. Ryan is caught in a very confusing and frustrating situation. He will prevail though, he has Connor and that or he is his Rock. For those of us who have been through hell and back the

I just don't think it is in Ryan's nature to do so. He would internalize it much more. He totally loves Connor and there is no going back. I think Ryan will have a "Come to Jesus" realization about what is going on and what real part he plays in other peoples lives. He will be changed by what ever happens but I think it will be a good change. He loves Connor to much to do anything bad to him. I have seen it many times over. Ryan will be the one who needs to heal and Connor will be the one who helps helps him heal no matter what. I have been there and done that, it is not a mystery to be solved. I just don't want Toby to die, he has such a strong life force and has so much ahead of him and he will be an impact on many peoples lives for the rest of his life. I just don't want him to end. David

Nickolasjames8, I am sorry if I offended you and it was wrong of me to make a blanket statement as such. I do not know what part of the country you live in but I live in Dallas, Texas the heart of the Bible Belt. There are those Baptists that do preach compassion but I am talking more about the Jerry Farwell

Hi All, Well, after seeing that everyone is caught up, I will throw in my two cents worth. I think we need to give Ryan a break! He holds everything in and I think he is a scared of everything as Toby is. Connor does not understand this and it is because Ryan did what he is doing once before. Ryan also knows that Toby is in good hands and now trusts Connor completely. His just a kid and does not want to realize what is going on around him or deal with it. Looks selfish on the outside, but truly it is a defense mechanism. I think we will see him fall apart soon because he can continue like this forever. The reason I feel this way is because my partner is the same way. Frustrating as hell sometimes but it is what it is. St. Peter is definitely a scary thought as to me indicates death. I don

Hi All, I am new to the forum but not the story. I have finished Chapter 19 and man, you just can't get enough. After going through the pages of notes, everyone seems to be on the same page as this is a very intense yet incredible story! I am not a big reader, but I have to tell you that I can seem to read through these chapters so fast that it is scaring me! I like it!. Now just a little bit about my point of view and to let everyone know a little about me as well. I love Connor, I can relate to Connor. When I was in JR High and High School, I was picked on the same way. I grew up in Springdale Ark which is Hillbilly town USA. You did not dare come out. But, if you were small and not athletic, you were tagged a fag. I tried and got along with most people though. I even had the panic attacks. LittleBuddahaTW's note earlier on Klonpin and Xanax is correct, but my Dr.'s have found that the Xanax is much faster reacting. Even though it is addicting, you can control the addiction as I have been taking it now for over 10 years and my dosage has not needed to be increased. I am also on Effixor another type of drug similar to Paxil. I just wish I could sing and play like Connor. Bye the way, is the Pic on the home page the way you see Connor? Sure would like to see what Ryan, Toby, Cody, and Mikie look like!! That would be a real bonus. Ryan is a real sweet heart, and he is having some tough times with his emotions. His reactions to things are typical of someone who likes to take their time and Ryan does. He Loves Connor so much that sometimes when I read the stories I actually cry!. Sappy I know but true. I have been with my partner for 17 years. We met when I was 23. Relationships are hard and you have to work at them. I do enjoy the way that Connor is always trying to work on his relationships and especially after his mistake with Cody concentrated on Ryan more. As far as can it last? I have friends who have been together longer than me and my partner and started dating in High School. They are still in love and doing great. Are they rare, yes but it does happen. The heart does not know what time is other than it grows with time. I hope Ryan and Connor continue to grow. I could write more, but I don't want to spoil any more of the chapters until some one posts something else. If I am in the wrong forum, please politely let me know. Looking forward to more chapters!!! I see a movie coming out of this!!