MacGreg

Yeah, Ben's mind is working overtime in the background to make sense of everything. Not only his own coming out but Travis' myriad issues and the stark realities of abuse and Eric, etc. But his mind is working it out, and that's important. Thanks as always for your comments and for starting a forum thread about the story! Cheers - Mac

Thank you, tim. xo

Thank you so much, Jeff. I really appreciate you following this story as we go along and offering your insight. You're right that Katy and Travis may now have an opportunity to reconcile some of their differences, which would be for everyone's benefit. It would lessen some of the angst and allow Ben and Travis to continue to pull closer together.

Thank you, pvtguy. And I agree with your viewpoints on hand-outs. There are too many variables to why homeless people are homeless to lump them all into the same category. Cheers - Mac

Eric is sort of an evil force who is circling the story but not really in it. He's the culprit of a lot of grief and anger, and main characters are being forced to deal with that. But there may now be a chance for Travis and Katy to reconcile some of their differences. That would be good for everyone's sake. Thanks for the great review, Val.

Yes, there is more coalescence happening in their ever-forming relationship. With that comes a little more trust and a little less resistance. They are not pushing so hard against each other but rather pulling closer together. Thank you for the great review, Gary.

The anticipation of finally meeting a love-interest in person collides with an unexpected surprise.

I went to a chiropractor for the first time in my life about 8 years ago. I'd been suffering from neck and shoulder pain that had become unbearable, and I was right in the middle of a complete relationship breakdown, which added to my physical ill-health. This chiropractor (who I since became good friends with) had a "healing" touch. Nothing like Kellar, of course, but he had the uncanny ability to lay hands on me and "pull" the pain out. What was left behind were heat spots on my skin. Literally, my skin emanated with heat. I always had to sit in his office and wait to regain my senses before leaving. I felt like a brand new person afterwards. So, I could completely understand your description of Kellar's healer abilities - only, of course, his are twenty-fold more and include an innate sensitivity. You described his gift extremely well, in layman's terms, through Kellar's words. You avoided trying to sound scientific, because we didn't need it to be explained that way (and neither did Tobyn). Anyway, I'm enjoying seeing Tobyn and Kellar move a step closer to one another. I'm looking forward to where this is going.

Brilliant take on the prompts, Val. I actually wasn't expecting the fish tank scenario until it was exposed at the end, so great job on that. Very cute, well done. These sorts of prompts are not easy!

The scenes, as hot as they are, continue to also heat up with emotion. Although we're learning more and more about Ryan's feelings and hesitations and deep desires, we're still not learning much about Erik in that regard. But there are hints (like him using Ryan's name in the filming) that give us hope that he possesses similar feelings. We shall see. Good ending with Ryan's decision that he is done with porn. Will be interesting to see how that plays out in the coming chapters, considering Erik will not be on the same page.

Beyond the arc of the front porch light, Ben could just make out Travis' profile. He was standing several yards down the driveway with his hands clasped behind his head, looking across the length of gravel and dirt to the main road beyond as though waiting for a car to appear. But the road remained quiet and dark, no evidence of life beyond the perimeter fence. Whatever vehicle had dropped Katy off a few minutes ago was long gone - and so, too, was Eric. Gingerly, Ben approached Travis. Pres

Great little piece. Kept me reading from beginning to end without hesitation. You're very good at weaving story lines that keep readers intrigued, tim, and I always want to know more about the characters you create. But to be honest the ending was a punch in the gut for me. Too close to home. Proof that your writing gets under people's skin...

So much more revealed in this chapter, Gary, but still a long list of questions waiting to be answered. I like that they're not answered all at once. I'd rather find out along the way, as Kellar finds out, and that's exactly how it's happening in this journey you're taking us on. Your character development and story line are superb. Already, I love Tobyn and Kellar, I feel invested in them both, and I'm enjoying the development of their friendship... and possibly more... there is definite connection/chemistry between them. The Earth Mate idea intrigues me, because as humans that's perhaps our biggest desire, and also our greatest sense of loss. So, already, you've pulled us in emotionally to feel a connection to the shifters and the dwindling pack. Superb.

"I could see the images slide across my screen" is great imagery in itself, Def! Thanks so much for this feedback. I will definitely be revisiting Matt and Jake and this story at some point. Cheers - Mac

Wow, thanks Jeffrey! I appreciate the encouragement and the vote to continue the story. At some point, I will. Matt and Jake have a lot going on. Thanks again. Cheers - Mac

Gary, thank you, I'm glad you think it stands alone. In a way, it does. I have a tendency to write short stories that jump into the middle of things and jump right back out, without a lot of information in between. With Dissonance, I'm trying to be more thorough and complete. I'll probably be revisiting this one. Thanks again, buddy. Cheers - Mac

Thanks for catching the Stacy vs. Stacey, Lisa. This was a draft, as you can tell. I already made several edits to it. This isn't even a first chapter... I don't think... we'll see. I need to navigate through the ideas again. Thanks for the great feedback. I appreciate it! Cheers - Mac

Thanks for writing such a great review, Def! It means a lot that you're digging this story so much and that you liked this portion of it. The truth will always come out, one way or another. You're right that Travis can't catch a break. Luckily, Ben is being a pillar for him right now, when he needs it the most. Next chapter will be out soon, don't worry. Thanks again - Mac

Thanks for your feedback, Larry, I appreciate it! I'll continue with Dissonance, don't worry!

Certain characters are painfully familiar to me, lol. My priority is definitely to Dissonance, don't worry. Thanks for dropping by and commenting, droughtquake. Cheers - Mac

Thanks, Mochatyger! I appreciate your feedback. Cheers - Mac

Val, I swear that's the same error you pointed out to me in one of the first chapter of Dissonance. I'm a repeat offender. Too many musical cords in my head. I fixed the error. Thanks for your review of this. It's kind of an experiment. I'm going to stay focused on Dissonance but will dabble in this one as the mood strikes. You're awesome. Cheers - Mac

I awake to a sun-drenched room. The stark white curtains of a disproportionately large window are drawn aside to reveal a startling blue sky beyond - brightness so painful that I'm forced to close my eyes again. For a moment I lay still, searching for a sense of clarity, a clue as to space and time and where the hell I am. My head is cotton. My limbs are dead weights. I can't decipher if I'm awake or still dreaming until memories of that night come rushing over me, like frigid waves of ocean wat

*A snippet of a larger concept that I've tinkered around with and may return to down the road.* Matt Donovan realizes that his relationship with Charlie isn't the secret he thought it was. Others within in his small fishing community are opening their eyes to his reality, including his one true crush, the outspoken, gruff-around-the-edges Jake Kowalczyk, who himself begins to discover that his feelings for Matt go beyond a platonic friendship after Matt almost dies.

More than just seasons of weather, all three poems seem to describe seasons of your life, Val, which are weather-worn, exhaustive, and rejuvenating in cycles. A really great trio to show together! I couldn't help but notice that all three of these poems share a common denominator: barriers. In the first poem, you describe igloo walls around you keeping you cozy and cold. In the second poem, you describe childbirth as adding another brick to the wall that will soon hold you in. In the third poem, you mention a blanket barrier that the wind cannot penetrate. Just found the common thread interesting.