Will Hawkins

window that took up one whole window - window that took up one whole wall. We have the it trapped in the subway systems - We have it trapped in the subway systems organs should have been but wasn’t.- organs should have been but wertn't. Still jagged cracks of lightning lit up the sky. . Jagged cracks of lightning still lit up the sky. Monster and sociopath was just a couple of them - Monster and sociopath were just a couple of them very sight of them made their hearts beat - very sight of him made their hearts beat I have gone through this chapter superficially and found some significant grammatical errors. This procedure is designed to HELP make the chapter better reading, not to disparage the ability of the author to tell a tale. You have piqued my interest, Val, with an interesting opening chapter and I will continue reading. The question I have is, do you wish me to continue making grammatical suggestions or to just sit back and enjoy your story telling prowess? It is up to you, just let me know one way or the other. Mister Will

No, I think you handled the situation very well. The only thing that might have happened is, because of the earlier warnings, The Principal could have kicked the boy out of school immediately. The additional warning such as was delivered may be interpreted by the boy's father as a sign of weakness. But ejection from school is a severe punishment, so mat be reserved for a last resort.

As this is a continuing event (Jack Kelly has been in trouble before and both he and his father have been warned), I feel an incident of this type has reached the level of assault and, while Jack is a minor and therefore not responsible for his actions, his father is an adult and is supporting and encouraging his son in reprehensible actions. This should be reported to the police and Tim Kelly should be held responsible for the actions of his son. In addition the use of the term 'dyke' and the inference that Moira would infect Jack with AIDS which, if it were true, implies an illegal and immoral sexual contact between a teacher and her pupil.

Hypnosis is a tool that psychiatrists use to reach the parts of a patient's memory that are being walled off by his conciousness, so it would seem to be something that could be applied here. Top notch writing, Valentine; a little bit outside my normal selection sphere, but I am hooked on this story, primarily because of the characterizations.

The statement about "curiouser and curiouser" was certainly the understatement of the year! Charley is obviously a deeply ingrained part of Brad's psyche, and I feel he is an important key. The lighthouse at Ardmore Cove will be the key that opens up the box of mysteries. The tats, jewelry and makeup are a declaration of difference for Brad, but they are a somewhat conventional declaration of "I am unique," we will see.

The two viewpoints is a very interesting way to get into a story. I'm looking forward to reading this.

I do not anticipate this as being as easy a case as others of your commenters do. People (juries) are reluctant to find against a 'young, fit, handsome, personable, cop,' as everyone seems to feel. We will have to see what you make of the case, Rich, but in any event it is interesting, a real five on the scale.

I’ve got to tell Pete that. I hope you don’t mind

Our victim, sitting in the living room barefoot with his jacket and tie hanging neatly on the back of a chair in the dining room. And in a fugue state that seemed to come on him in rather a hurry, there are more and more inconsistencies that deserve investigation. The plot thickens!

As you develop the back-story, Richard, this story gets more and more interesting. This latest interview for example; the local policeman seems to be very nervous, on edge about the possibility of people questioning his experience/competency. There are many unique points in the problem also; a man who hates sit-down baths, comfortably seated in a tub with the water flowing just right to keep it warm, thereby fucking up a determination of 'time-of-death. That would indicate that he died somewhat earlier than the evidence would indicate, and that fact would be important only to a murderer who needed an alibi for the later time. Hmmm?

One of the advantages of being married, especially to another man. being able to sit there, comfortably, saying nothing. That peaceful interlude is a rarity in a heterosexual marriage.

I, too, am continuing my read of the CAP series. I won't repeat my comments about your writing, Mark. But if your interested in my opinion, read my comment on the last chapter of 'The Land Whore' Meanwhile I am looking forward to reading every book in the series, one after another.

I remember the long lines at gas stations and how upset we were when the price of gasoline leapt from 25 to 30 cents a gallon. At today's price of a nationwide average of about $3.25/gal. that seems humorous. Today the US with its shale oil production has replaced all the Near Eastern countries, both individually and as a group as the world's largest supplier of fuel oils, and the Venezuelan problem has nearly bankrupt that country because the price of oil has fallen into the $50/bbl area and the Venezueas economy was based on prices well over that.

I visited Australia many years ago as a non-performing member of the Seattle Men's Chorus accompanying them on their tour of the eastern coast between Sidney and Cairns (I was an Assistant Stage Manager, which is theater-speak for 'flunky') as a side benefit of that visit, our group was given a personalized tour of the Sidney Opera House. As I remember (it was many years ago) the guide was not speaking very highly of the structure. Apparently the biggest faults had to do with poor acoustics in the main house, poorly designed stage machinery for opera productions, and bad sight-lines in the smaller venues as well as taking nearly ten years longer than scheduled to complete and entailing cost overruns of nearly 100%. Over the years most of those faults (except for the costs), I understand, Have been cured and the structure is now accepted as a positive contribution to the Sidney skyline and music scene. From the exterior it is an exciting and beautiful building, but has a history of being a deficient venue for Opera, Symphony and audience enjoyment.

I remember well a trip I made with my then current boyfriend. They were relocating a tourist liner from the Seattle area to San Diego following the end of the summer season and following the tourists down to Southern California, but there a maritime law that forbids a vessel to sail from one US port to another without a stop at a foreign port between the two. That meant they could not sail directly from Seattle to San Diego. So they were offering much reduced fares to sail from Seattle to Vancouver, Canada, then to San Francisco and from there to a Mexican port with a bus trip back to the US and a flight from San Diego back to Seattle. The sea trip was very enjoyable as first class accommodations were offered at nearly Steerage rates, but one leg of the trip from Tijuana, Mexico back to San Diego was by bus. I will never forget the abject poverty we saw along the road. The Mexican were living in huts constructed in the main part of surplus doors from house wreckers in the US. Some of the panels still had 'MEN' painted on them and there would be a half-dozen barefoot children living in a shack with their mother, the men of the family were working on the fields, picking strawberries and sending their wages back to their family in Mexico to live on. It was totally depressing. The poverty was overwhelming and something that none of us had ever seen before. When we reached the border, we were herded through immigration in a large group as we did not have Visas to visit Mexico, loaded back into a bus and put on a plane for Seattle immediately. The difference between the roadsides in Mexico and the neat and tidy houses we saw in California was a great shock.

Having Tonto at Escorial is certainly going to liven thing up, she is such uninteresting, and out spoken, character. He is like chili sauce on spaghetti. I love her characterization, Mark. Let's hear a lot fr om her.

I, too, am re-reading the CAP series, but in my case, the interval between the first reading and this one is long enough so that each chapter comes to me fresh, without memory of what happens next. It is even more of a delight than if I remembered the events from the first reading -- it is like a new story to me. As an old gay man, I am a tiny bit upset over the frequency of sex scenes in the writing, as I feel that sex between men should be an exciting and exclusive thing, but then I remember this is GA and sexual scenes are the reason for it being here for me to read -- if I don't want to read about sex, all I have to do is skip those few paragraphs and enjoy the story. So, Mark, keep up your efforts just as you are doing and I will follow along, loving (almost) everything just as I have been. At one time, I had a similar problem with the 'Bridgemont' series and came to the same compromise.

So true!. In some parts of the world, being gay is still a death sentence - I am thinking of some African countries in particular. In this era (2019), it seems that Protestant and Catholic countries, though it seems strange to separate the countries of the world into religious groups today, are becoming somewhat more tolerant, but Islamic countries are stuck in the mores of the Sixteenth Century.

A very sad chapter, but so well written.

Whoops! This will not bode well for JP's relationships, but it is typical of three (four) ways. Creative writing, Mark. Leave it to you to toss bumps in the road!

I guess 'sharing' is one solution to the web of relationships, let's hope it works without anyone getting hurt.

It is probable that we need to get all the actors in this life drama together to get the relationships worked out, but it is going to be a strain with one loving another who loves a third, etc. It is, however, your magic, Mark, that will make all this tangled web, weave into the lives of those involved. It is not an Olympic event, but there are going to be winners and losers. https://images.app.goo.gl/shDJP2z8meCz1zNa6

This is certainly a chapter of transition -- JP moves to Escorial, and starts the process of his change into an adult, not always a good change; Isidore arrives and starts the process of becoming the Grand Dame of Escorial, Sam and she meet and charm one another, Jeff undertakes his psychological housecleaning, the school riots of 1968 begin to develop, the lest is almost endless. There is enough going on in this one chapter to provide an author with story~line for a book all by itself, which is something that you, Mark, are going to make use of I know. 'May you live in interesting times.'

If my memory serves me (which is doubtful at my age) 1968 was an unfortunate year for our country. I am looking forward to your melding of the historical events of the year with the story of our family. This is a step in JPs becoming the leader in the family and I am anticipating great changes-

A marriage of convenience with an adoption of Ace solves the immediate problems, but does it create more in the future? After gay marriage is made legal in the US, being married to Isidore would complicate JP's desire to be a couple with Jeff and getting out of marriage to Isidore could complicate it even more if she really wanter to be snarky about it. Oh, what a tangled web we weave.