Firstly, previewing this, the colour is sick, but I don't know how to change it being new to here. Now on with the reply.
From personal experience, I think a bit of both.
I was lucky in that at the age of ten, I found my first true boyfriend and sexual partner, and we explored just about every avenue of sex that it's possible, just using our own bodies, by the time we reached our mid teens. We literally discovered sex between males on our own before we were eleven even though there was no ejaculation from either of us. We just figured what needed doing.
I wrote and posted the story of this on Nifty. It'll be here on Gayauthors shortly. I know since then that having had relationships with others, reading about what is apparently acceptable has made one or two, well perhaps more, (!), more adventurous in what they tried for themselves. Without having read about it, they might have merely only tried a quick fumble and wank.
On the other hand, knowing what is possible in fully enjoying the physical side of gay sex, I have felt less inhibited about writing it into stories. Maybe this will influence others to try something that they otherwise would have been too embarrassed to try.
I think this might be an interesting thread of comments!
Mike.