Meeko

Wow.... Just wow... that's all i can say.

Hey Luc Very interesting blog. To me i feel that i am who i want to be, i try to be a fun go happy kind of guy, who always trys to see the good parts of life, and live around that. I am someone who will try to confort you when you are down, even if it means making myslef look like a total idot, if it makes you smile, then i've done my job. I've noticed one thnig though and i'll share it with you, My feelings/Emotions really do make a big differen't in my apperance. For example if i am in a real shitty mood, i tend to look a lot more shitty, but when i am in a really really good i think i look somewhat decent (sometimes!!) Anyway getting back to your point, to me i am whoever i choose to be. -LC

Hey Kevin So let me start off by saying, i'm happy that you're happy! I am also happy that you came out to your friend and she was okay with it, i hope to be able to do the same one day, hehe. I only know one girl who's les, and i love her... She doesn't know about me yet, but i still love her, hell we don't even know each other very well but everything we are together it's always soo much fun. She's also very open about being Les, hell she pretty much told me the same day i met her, and she's such a sweet kind person.... On the other hand she's crazy and very wild, just like me? haha. Anyway i hope you are having a wonderful week, take care. -LC

Begin's chanting loudly... "PART 3 PART 3 PART 3 PART 3, I NEED PART 3 RWARRRRRRRRR PART 3, PART 3 PART 3 PART 3 PART 3, I NEED PART 3 RWARRRRRRRRR PART 3,PART 3 PART 3 PART 3 PART 3, I NEED PART 3 RWARRRRRRRRR PART 3,PART 3 PART 3 PART 3 PART 3, I NEED PART 3 RWARRRRRRRRR PART 3" ENDS RANT Now give us part 3!!!!! <3 -LC

God Viv it's like everything you wrtie is just simply amazing, and i agree with CJ it really does seem like a lot more people are accepting now days. Or from what i hear anyway it was pretty bad back then >< I love your conversations, but the goats got to go... i mean really.... <3 CJ -LC

Hey Cj Wow, and to think i had it bad? thats very rough man, but the most important thing is that your alright... You are alright aren't you? I very much hope soo.. I've never encountered anything that bad just yet, but i really hope you are okay, and if you need help, i'd love to fly down there and watch you get all sweaty and take off your shirt>< LOL I'm just kidding hehe or am i?? Anyway i hope all is well, and that you get everything fixed and back into shape! -LC

Haha, Which one??

0_o

Hey so there are a lot of hot guy's here!! So i guess i should post another picture of me ehh? i already have one as my profile picture, which is ugly!!! But here is another, i hope your ready to be blinded!! haha -LC

I agree Rigel, but what's a story without radioactive bombs?? I mean really.... We know how much CJ likes his action!! And i can't wait to see what he has in store for us. -LC

Hey Richie Let me start by saying congrats on finally talking to your roomate and getting him out, people who walk on other's like that just get me very upset, and i'm so proud for you!! As to your question i'm pretty werid when it comes to me checking someone out, or showing interest i tend to get really scared and aviod that person at all costs, then after that perosn isn't with me anyone i kick myself for being so dumb... So pretty much i'll never get asked out nor will i ask anyone out becuase i'm too scared haha!! -LC P.S. Sorry if i wasn't much help ><

I hope your being sarcastic about the "cool Boss" thing becuase to me this guy is a down right scum bag, who needs to get laid or something.... =P

Have to to say bond, after reading this story agian, i don't think they are homophobic, instead i think they know something, about chase and the ex lead singer that maybe we don't know about just yet..... Hell i could be totally wrong here but this is just what i got so far from the story.... -LC

Congrats on your 500th too And CJ i'm very glad your no longer in danger, if something happened to you i don't know what ever i will do... i mean who else would finish your wonderful storys for you? I am celebrating the end of working with 200 kids, and the start of school!!! Woohooo

God CJ Why do you keep doing this to me.... Making such good stories so i have to read them, i mean dang i already have enough to read, and now you add more to my plate.... Did you ever know that your my heroo, your everything i wish i could be!!!!!! Okay so wow i just read both part 1 and 2, and all i can say is WOW... I love how we learn so much about brandon in such a short time.... If i didn't know what kind of site this was, i wouldn't even think anything about him being gay. When i read this i had to take a double take, and read it agian, idk if anyone else got this feeling but to me it's seems if Chase is hiding a certian something about himself. Anyway i can't wait to read more of this story Cj as always great work! -LC

Wow Kevin I love your blog, i must say everytime i see you in the forums, you always seem very happy and helpful, and to see this different side of you made me double check to see if this was really your blog. What i'm trying to say is you are a happy person, and to see you this way really breaks my heart, i really wish there was something i could say or do that would help you, but i know there isn't. All i can say is no matter how far away they are you guys can always still keep in touch right? Your a great friend btw, it's very nice of you being able to put all your feelings aside and be able to go to there farewell party, good for you. Take care Kev. -LC

Have you ever listened to a song's lyric, and were able to relate to most of what the lyrics say? I know most people base there music on themselves or something that has happened to them, so sure a lot of people would be able to relate right? I know on many occasions i've listened to a song and thought "Hey, thats just how i'm feeling." But this one song really got to me. :wacko: Hey dad look at me Think back and talk to me Did I grow up according to plan? And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do? But it hurts when you disapprove all along And now I try hard to make it I just want to make you proud I'm never gonna be good enough for you I can't pretend that I'm alright And you can't change me 'Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late and We can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect I try not to think About the pain I feel inside Did you know you used to be my hero? All the days you spent with me Now seem so far away And it feels like you don't care anymore And now I try hard to make it I just want to make you proud I'm never gonna be good enough for you I can't stand another fight And nothing's alright 'Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late and We can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect Nothing's gonna change the things that you said Nothing's gonna make this right again Please don't turn your back I can't believe it's hard Just to talk to you But you don't understand 'Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late and We can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect 'Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late and We can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect From this song i get the message that the singer has an issue with his dad. His issue is clear, his dad disaproves of who he is, and what he's doing. The singer trys to make his dad proud, but no matter what he does he'll never be what his dad wants. The reason this song got me soo tied up is becuase of how much i can relate to it. My dad never accepted me, and it's not that he didn't accept me becuase i was gay.. He doesn't even know that part of me.... He just doesn't accept me as a person. No matter what i do to try and make him proud, it's never good enough for him, I'll never be the perfect son he wants. It scares me becuase it's not only one or two lines in the song that i relate too, it's the whole entire song. Every single word. It's something i've always noticed about music, it's the beat and the lyircs. Then agian i guess a lot of people do this right? There able to relate to a song soo much it's hard to listen to the song, to know how much truth comes from it. -LC

So it has been a while since I have posted a blog, and a lot has been happening since then. Yesterday I came home from a 3 day camp trip with 100 teens, ages 12-17 and it was a good trip. (If any of you are wondering it was for work and yes I was forced to go!) Though it was funny, on the last day of camp my co workers and I decided to play a pretty mean prank on our teens, and well..... Ever heard the saying "Boy's don't cry?" it's totally true, first they scream and run around all crazy like, then they brake down and start to cry!! All eight of our boy's ended up sleeping in the middle of the tent all bunched up together, way too close may I add, which was way fine by me seeing as how my co worker and I ended up having the rest of the tent too sleep >< So today was a very interesting day. I learned something I never would of thought, pretty much one of my kid's that are in the summer program I work, lets call him Bob? So... Bob and I are pretty close, he is 10 years old and a very smart and cute kid. He isn't in the group I take care of but he is always around me every time our groups are together. Anyway we were playing basketball and he was sitting on back to back behind me on the bench. I don't remember how we got into the topic but he started to tell me about one of the other boy's in his group and how he's gay. When I asked him how he knew that he told me that the other boy told him he liked him, more as a friend. So I asked Bob how he felt about it, and he said he didn

CJ So i have to say..... so far you and Viv made my day.. i mean hell your two stories are the only two i have seen yet, and i can't wait to read the rest. Anyway just amazing Cj, at frist when you talked about the old lady, and how she warned Drake, the frist thing i thought about was Pele, the Hawaiian god of fire. When i was little i always heard stories about her, and how she would come to people's doors wearing old raggy clothes, and ask them for food and water. And how only 1 of the three houses she asked gave her food and water, but the man who did got a hint from her, she told him about a volcane that was going to irrupt and how he should place tee leaves all around his house to stay safe. Let's just say the story ends with him doing what she said and being the only house out of the 3 to make it.... Okay so getting back to the story, it was beatiful, Brillant, I would use more words, but i'm too stupid!! The way Drake had to go out there and help him even though he knew they would never make it touched me soo much. Great Job CJ i always look forward to your stories!!! -LC

Hey Bond Congrats on your first blog man! I love going to bar's and seeing bands there, some of the best bands i know started off in bar's so good luck man, sounds like loads of fun. -LC

Hey Joe It sucks to hear that things have been going crappy for you lately, and i hope they get better soon! As for Transformers i heard so many great things about this movie and plan to go watch it tomorrow. Did you enjoy it? -LC

Hey Kevin I had this same thing happen to me once, only the person i asked for the condoms ended up being a friend of my mom.... Lets just say i had a long time with my mother when i got home that day..... Anyways ttyl. -LC

CONGRATS INDEED GRAEME!!! *Looks at number of posts* I don't think i'll ever catch up to you hehe. -LC

First let me say i just spent about an hour aguring with my best friend about flip flops. The first time i ever heard this i was like wtf is that, and when someone told me what they were i said ohh Slippers? Yes in hawaii they are called SLIPPERS, I don't care if slippers means something else somewhere else in hawaii they are slippers.... slippers slippers slippers..... Now that that is over with, Tantulis is known for being a death spot, for all the racers who love to speed up and down the mountain, and with all the other stuff that goes on up there, i'm not surprised one bit that no one else called the cops. It's 100 percent beleiveable. Everyone who either drives up or down is too busy trying not to crash and aviod oncoming traffic that they won't notice a lot of other things happening.... I am very offended by this... LOL We don't eat unusual food thank you!!! lol I love saimin, do a lot of you really not know what that is? if soo that is a very big shame lol, it's so cheap and easy to make... and GOOD!!!! lol As for the Portuguese sausage and egg's with rice that is one of my faves... not the MCD ones but the ones at the resturant i work at haha. LMFAO This is by far the best line i have yet to read in my life, totally amazing lol. As always great chapter CJ glad that Blackheart is finally dead.... Now if only the same could happen to a ceritan eric we all love. Keep up the great stuff and i can't wait for 34!!! -LC

So Hello i am Lost Cause or you could just call me LC, either or works. I decided to start up a blog and get into bloging, it's a way for me to share things with you wonderful people out there, and also to kind of get things thats been bothering me off my chest without hurting anyone's feelings. (As much fun as it is, i have to play nice too!!) So about a week ago, i started to feel depressed :wacko: like i have off and on these days, and while in my *depressed Mood* I began to listen to the old sappy sad love song music. I know what your gonna say, thats sad..... But i don't care, hehe i usually find that the music i listen to reflects alot off of my moods, and how i am feeling, Strange right? So while listening to a song that really started to teach me when i really listened to the lyrics, i suddenly found myself typing. I just typed the frist things that would pop into my head, and later tried to make it into kind of a poem. It's pretty bad i know! but tell me what you think. I am the same person I've always been Only today you learn something new You learn who I really am, and what's really true You'll see me as someone different then who you thought you always knew You'll look deep into my eyes to try and find the truth All these year's I've been hiding from who I really am When deep down inside I've known it all along You've showed me who I am You've showed me what is right You've helped me to live with This never ending lie I'm done with hiding I'm done with the lies I finally found the truth somewhere inside I may not be normal I may not be cool But I am happy Becuase I know who I am I am yours As i go back and read what i wrote, the frist thing that comes to my mind is what does this mean, what did you write this about. And surprisingly alot of people don't get it. It's not the best way to be telling people i'm Gay, but it is a start wouldn't you think? I mean it's not like i said anywhere in the poem "I'm gay and i don;t care what you think so bite me," you know? Becuase if it were only that easy trust me i would of done it such a long time ago. But really i wrote it to see what people would think, and how they would approach me about it, seeing as how i posted it into my myspace. But i guess the mood i was in was a confused one, about me and how my life is currently being played out before me. How i am Gay yet closeted to mostly everyone in my life who matters the most to me. And as scared as i am, to finally come out i think in a small way i already did. I mean i knew that i had feelings for guy's since i was 13 year's old. Yet only now when i am 19 going on to 20 soon, am i really opening up to my i guess you can call it Gay side. Only this year have i really realized what gaydar was and how it seems to work. Or only this year have i had my very frist boyfriend, which just ended up using me for sex, but hey... that is a different blog all on it's own. Only this year have i talked to other gay guys/ been to a gay club. And there are more, to me these are just things that help me to believe in myself more and who i am. Okay so before i start not making any sense and all and just writing random scrible i'll end this with a conclusion. conclusion, i think in my own way i'm finally coming out and really showing the true me, the same person i have always been, and always plan to be, only now i am more open to how i feel about other guys, no matter who is watching. It's my life not theirs and i will live it the only way that will make me happy, being gay! Anyway's it's about 2:27 am and i'm pretty pooped, so i think it's time for this kid to hit the hay. Have a wonderful but safe weekend all. -LC