JayBear41
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Everything posted by JayBear41
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Perfectly structured epilog. A satisfying and meaningful resolution to your story arc. I could read 20 more chapters about these characters, but you ended very nicely. Great, great work.
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Excellent work on this chapter. Well written.
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Excellent first chapter. Nice handling of a difficult topic and especially nice final sentence that is a bridge onward. This first chapter alone could stand as a fine short story. Very well done.
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An excellent story so far. Very well written and edited. More interesting than most of the stories on this site. Did you ever publish the end anywhere?
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A well-written story with an excellent plot. One of the best on this website.
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A nice story about two young men without teenage angst and the uncertainty of teenagers. This work has a very interesting plot which makes up the storyline without being overly engrossed with detailed obsession with details of sexual relations. It is a nice, more literary work.
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An excellent piece of writing. Unique, not just another copy of the same old plots. Chapters are long and well-developed. Take close note of the character names and nicknames.
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The author has a great sense of teenage personalities and emotions. The parents presented seem to be withdrawn from their children, but this adds to the feeling of teenage angst. I was a bit confused about the chronology. Sometimes a lot happens and five or six chapters later it is the next day after what seems like a much earlier major incident. I pushed myself to read the entire story and found that the ending was not what I expected even though it was well developed. Try not to give up on the read if the chronology confuses you.
