centexhairysub

Hell, I am starting to get an idea of what happened and I am really freaking out. I wonder if it is possible that Aaron survived. We know that Steven did not because of how he dies and the funeral and stuff afterward but did Aaron live???

I am sitting here crying. I don't know why this upsets me so but it does. I think it was just really sweet for the most part but I guess since we know that Steven doesn't make it back that it is just really hard.. Tonto was the best even then. I have to think that the issue with JP and Stef when Stef cam over was more the age difference than anything else...

Damn, so Nathan topped Aaron. I would not have believed it. I guess I would have thought it was Aaron on top. While I don't approve of the incest, per se, I won't really be freaked out about it. I actually think it happens more between brothers than most people realize. Not to that extent but mutual masturbation and oral...

Damn, so Steven has slept with Aaron and now Nathan. I wonder who else before he gets out of Claremont...

I keep trying to remembe exactly how much younger JP was then Steven. I want to say that Steven was about ten years older. I am starting to wonder if something happened between the two of them. I don't mean actual sex but something. It has been a long time since we saw JP this rattled about something. There just seems to be something about this diary that really is upsetting JP.

It is so strange to look back and see how different everyone was that far in the past; or maybe it was just that we are looking at them with different eyes but I don't think so. The Hayes seem to be a kind but loving family, this is a total 180 from how they are portrayed later. Jim seems to be a total ass, this really doesn't fit him all that much. At least not until his father dies and he sleeps with Bitty. I guess it is just strange to see the total change in everyone... JP was really neat as a child. I would sort of like to see a story of JP when he was in his early to late teens maybe... I do wonder what he is so worried about. You can really tell he is freaking out some about this diary...

It is hard to think of old man Hayes in the way being described; they seem to be in shock that he had gone to the tavern and gotten drunk. He must have really changed... I think it is really noble in some way how Aaron wants to go off and fight; but I don't think it is going to end well for anyone...

If history has shown us anything, it is that the very young and the very old are who fight, suffer, and die in wars.... I guess because when I was in my late teens and early 20's there was just nothing military going on with the US; and no, you can't count Grenada, so I never really saw the military as something really special or even useful...

I just have to say what a great job you have done with the music pics over the last few chapters... I love how you have pulled some of them from the past to compliment what is happening now. The Bette Midler and the Procol Harum songs were just perfect at those two moments.

You can just see all the storm clouds gathering. I have a feeling by the time this is over, it is gonna be one depressing story in this saga... I think Aaron is acutally more in love with Steven than Steven is with him. I think the problem is that Aaron is much more tied up in what others think and that freaks him out a lot more than Steven.

I really do think that was the issue with Marie. Everytime that her husband was an ass or undercut her with Jim, she had sex with someone. I will not even say an affair because often it appears to have been just sex. I think that striking back at him on top of being sort of all alone in that she was from France and so different from everyone else made her lonely....

Well, I knew the women with Tonto was going to be Marie. I am suprised about the young men though. I remember the conversation that JP and she had about Andre. I guess, I can see Stef's point though. She was probably not really going to be all upfront about her sex life with JP. I wonder if JP picked up the trick about the emotional wall from watching Steven. I have a feeling that even at a young age, JP was more observant that most people realized.

Damn, there does seem to be quite a few children born without the benefit of their parents being married in these stories. I never really thought about it before now. I guess that Jim is like a lot of men. They are not really free to be themselves until their own father is gone. I have to wonder why that is? It is strange to think about how far back the Hayes family as sort of been in and out of the families of each of the three main Claremont families.

It is so strange to read about something that damn near repeated itsef twenty years apart. You almost wonder if there is a genetic proponent but it is more just fate, I think. I love how JP can read Stef and vice versa. They just make the cutest couple.

That was so sad. Steven reached out to Aaron but while not be rejected, he certainly wasn't taken in with open arms... I am not sure where this is going but can't wait to see what happens next. I think it is great that we are getting to see JP and even Billy at such a young age...

Well, if you think about it; there is really only one woman that Tonto could have been with and that is her sister in law, Marie, JP's mother... I will just about beat anything that it was her. I can imagine how scary it would be to both Steven and Aaron to have the situation they were in starting up.

Getting to see Tonto in action was just great. I really like how she stood up to Barry about getting Steven a car. I can just see her in action on anything that she thought was important. Steven seems like a really great guy. I can't wait to see what is secret really is...

I had really forgotten that we meet up with Matt's half brother, Caleb. I think it would be great if we maybe got to see him again. I love how they all handled the situation with what was in the box. Wade was right about putting the bible in it and JP was right that they needed to get the information out of the museum before anyone else had a chance to do something to stop them. I really like the visits back to Claremont much more than anyone in the story does... LOL...

Tonto had a secret? I bet this is something that she was trying to keep hidden to protect someone else. I really miss that we never truly got to say goodbye to Tonto... I still think that is the one thing missing from this saga...

Seriously, I think I am going to invest in Kimberly-Clark; they make Kleenex. I think for me the last two chapters have been sadder in some ways than the chapters that actually dealt with the deaths. Those chapters were full of sorrow but you were so caught up in the horror of it that it registered differently. I really think that the way Wade was notified was just a little out of the ordinary. It may have been because of the sheer number of people killed and injured in the Pentagon attack but you would have thought for a senior US Senator; there would have been a little more of the personal touch. I am so glad that Wade and the Senator had done so much to repair their relationship. That should make this easier at least in the long run for Wade to deal with this. The issue of Elizabeth is rather moot until we know the terms of the Senator's will. Beau should be at least 18 based on the ages given in past stories, this make Elizabeth's control really limited. I don't think anything but money will control Mary Ellen and she would probably sell her part of the land, if she is left any, just to get the cash. When Nana was declared competent; she got back control of the major trust that had been set up for both Mary Ellen and Beau. Wade already has control of his. Elizabeth has a large trust and probably additional resources but I would susptect that the money in any of the three trust that children have will dwarf hers. I am sure that Elizabeth will try and cause problems but Wade and Nana really do control considerable more money, influence, and power than Elizabeth can muster. On top of that, they could provide evidence to have her arrested on a variety of charges. I really don't see where she will end up being anything more than a nuisance. Matt is going to be torn between the horror of losing Robbie and trying to help Wade overcome the loss of his father and any fall out from having to deal with Wade's family. I think Robbie gave Matt something to anchor himself to but I was never sold that they had a true father/son relationship. Matt always seemed to view Robbie more as a favorite uncle or beloved older brother. I think he will be heartbroken but his father, the man that raised him, is still alive. Frank is devestated and will continue to have fall our from Robbie's death. I just hope that he can overcome it and that he and Isidore can make what time each of them have left something really special. I have to wonder if we will get a look at Robbie's brother or sister with everything that will be going on after his death. I believe the brother sort of sided with their mother and became a member of her church but the sister just sort of disappeared in the late 80's or so. I don't know that anyone has heard from her since. I hope someone slaps the shit out of his mother if she has the indecency to show up at any of his services... Darius has Ella to take care of. I don't know if they are going to end up back together but as long as he has her to focus on; he can put off dealing with a part of his grief. I think it will be interesting to see the road ahead for Darius... JJ is the one that I really worry about. Him breaking down and crying and showing that side to Will shows just how devestated and alone he feels. If you think about it; Jeanine and Robbie were the two that really pushed him and encouraged him in the skating, other than Matt who introduced him to skating. I could actually see him just walking away from the skating. That would not actually be an unusual reaction to everything that has gone on with him. Stef is still clearly shaken by everything that has occured. I don't think he has even started to deal with his feeling or reactions to what has occured. I do think he will let Brad take the lead on the issues with Ander-Hayes. Stef cares about the company because of his past with Greg but I don't think he is as tied to it as he once was. Brad is staying busy so he doesn't have to deal with the loss of Robbie. He thinks if he stays busy enough it will keep everything at bay, but this never works and usually makes the crash much more severe when it does happen. I thought the seen at the end with him in bed with JJ on one side and Will on the other was just perfect. It was like a snapshot from the past from happier times. I think that Brad will do what he can to honor Robbie's wish for the way that Ander-Hayes is run. I don't see anyone that Robbie left anything to trying to really challenge what Robbie's wishes were for the company. I am so happy that Will was able to get through to John. I really believe that Will and John will always be best friends and will always be there for each other. I did love John's overheard comment to Marie... I am so glad that Will realizes how much he means to Claire. I really do feel that she will step in to try and help Will and the others in any way she can. I thought the way that Will held JJ and just let him cry and lash out says so much about their real relationship. If anyone ever doubted how tight the two of them really are; they just needed to witness that. JP is a tower of strength but I do believe that he will need reinforcments soon. I think he will reach out to Wade when he finds out about the Senator and do what he can for him as well. In so many ways, Wade is more like JP than any of his own children. JP will stay strong as long as he has to then he will take time to grieve in private after he has been there for everyone else.... Outstanding work, Mark...

No one deserves to hit that milestone more than you.....

I get so excited to see a new chapter and then what is going on hits me and I start to tear up all over again... Mark, thank you, this has just been a truly remarkable job on your part. I just know that Elizabeth is going to cause problems but I have a feeling that Wade and Nana will handle her, and if they can't just turn JP, Brad, and Will loose on her. That was such a shocking way for Wade to have to find out about his father. I guess that is how it should have been handled but it just seemed really jarring. I hope that he and Matt are able to work their way through this. I am so glad that Will got through to John. I loved John's little dart at Marie that you could overhear. I am so glad that they got through to Claire and let her know what is going on. Anyone that doubts the love between Will and JJ only had to read this one encounter to understand it will always be there. Will is going to do what he can to help JJ survive this. I am really worried about JJ almost more than anyone else. Brad handled the situation with Frank as well as could be expected I guess. I think I would have tried to talk to Isidore first, but he might have been afraid to lose the connection. I hope that Frank is able to survive this, hopefully Isidore will be able to help him get through it as well. Brad handled the situation with Ander-Hayes in part because he is trying to avoid dealing with his grief and by staying busy he is putting it off. I think he did what Robbie wanted him to but he and Stef will step in and correct anything that has to be done to make sure the company survives. Darius is trying to keep himself busy in much the same way by reconnecting with Ella. His grief will hit him and he will end up having to deal with it but at least his family is there for him. The scene with Brad getting into bed with JJ on one side and Will on the other was just the perfect way to end the chapter...

This was a really special chapter and it really pulled a lot of the issues that have been ongoing throughout the chapter to conclusions. I really loved how it resolved the issues that Matt had with his parents and that Wade is working on overcoming the abuse issue with his father. Bravo, Mark, Bravo...

WOW, that was just too good. The scene at the country club was just perfect. I have to admit it was really funny but so sweet as well; nice of is parents to be willing to stand up for him by taking him back there... I am glad that the Senator and Wade are trying to work things out. They are both fighters so I hope they can fight and work to get a relationship that they should have...

This was just handled so well by Mark. Not to use it as an excuse in anyway, but this is something you find in theraputic circles. A father was abused as a child so that it was he does to his own child because in some ways, that is the only way he knows how to relate to that child. This was just so well written and researched... Thanks for both, Mark.