Redemption's A Bitch - 15. Sit On Your Cloud

“Ready Shadow? Get ‘im!” Kieran released the big black husky from his hands, and Shadow sprang across the darkened room and landed neatly on Shastan’s bed where he immediately went about waking up the groom with his large, wet, pink tongue.

“Morning Cus!”

“Oh God.”

“Twenty-four hours to recover and you’re still hung over?” Kieran had given his cousin the previous day to himself after he’d rolled home, blind drunk, at six in the morning. Abandoned by his stags, Shastan had managed to lose his phone at some point, and hadn’t been able to get the gate open. Kieran had seen him into his bed and left him too it, gods knew he liked to be left well alone when he was hanging off the edge of a cliff, staring into the abyss of being sober.

“It dawned on me that I’m getting married today.”

“You’re only just realising that now?” Kieran opened the curtains. “It’s gonna be a beautiful day.”

It was, sort of, a normal morning. Kieran made waffles on the Aga like it was any other Saturday morning, slicing strawberries and fresh peaches into wafer thin strips while Shastan made hot chocolate on the other stove, stirring cinnamon and cream into the pan like a man on auto-pilot. In a reversal of their normal roles, Kieran read snippets of news and watched carefully while Shastan chewed his food in a rather forgetful and automatic manner. Afterwards, Kieran sent his cousin upstairs to have a restorative shower, and he went outside with the dogs.

“Good lad Shadow, well done,” Kieran petted his oldest friend, “you’re a good boy.”

Shadow bounced up and wrestled Kieran to the ground, and so he was rather distracted by the pile of dogs when his phone rang. Kieran answered it without looking at the call-screen.

“Residence of the Sussex Mad Dog Society.”

“Kieran?”

“Oh, hey Sparrow,” Kieran pulled himself partially out from under the mass of canines, “you never call me.”

“I wanted someone to talk to who wasn’t hysterical,” Robin muttered, “the hair and make-up girl is late, apparently this equals the end of the universe.”

“You should come get ready here,” Kieran smiled up at the sky, rubbing Vuka’s muzzle as he spoke, “much more relaxed.”

“Yeah, ‘bout that.” Kieran sat up, pushing the dogs off him properly, concerned by Robin’s serious tone. “I’m taking you as my date.”

“What?”

“Will you come to my sister’s wedding with me?”

Kieran paused.

This is one of those moments where the obvious is not the point of the conversation, he told himself sternly, the boy you profess to love just asked you out. Say something, you idiot.

“Yes.” Kieran took a breath. You need air, it’s important. “Can I come pick you up?”

“No, but you can take me home.”

“Really?” Kieran’s brain reeled through the possible nuances of the phrase faster than his pulse could keep up with them. “Yes please.”

“Whoa there, Kieran, we have a whole wedding to get through first. And stop tonguing your lip. You’ll split it open again.”

Kieran ceased the action and frowned.

“Are you spying on me?”

“Wouldn’t that be fun? No, you just did it all the time at the stag. It’ll never heal if you do that.” Robin paused, obviously listening to something in the background. “See you in a couple of hours.”

“See you.”

“Oh Kier,” Kieran brought the phone back to his ear quickly, “I love you.”

And then he hung up. Kieran stared at the phone for a moment then punched the air in triumph.

“YES!”

“Kieran!” Shastan’s voice rose in panic from the house. “Where the fuck are all my clothes?”

Kieran got up, grinning from ear to ear. His cousin’s panic didn’t worry him, nothing worried him now. He could turn up to the wedding bleeding, in jeans with bare feet. Robin loved him, and suddenly, nothing else mattered.

*

“How do I look?”

“You look like you’re about to throw up.”

“Kieran!”

“I’m kidding, you look great.” Kieran adjusted his cousin’s tie, squaring up the knot and pressing it flat against his chest so that it didn’t wrinkle under the waistcoat. “Just breathe Shas, and try to smile.”

“OK.” Shastan exhaled loudly. “You look good by the way.”

Kieran grinned. He refrained from telling his cousin that he’d been correct, and that he didn’t need a fancy new wedding suit. Kieran was wearing a more recent purchase from Gresham Blake in soft grey marl with yellow accents. He was particularly pleased that he’d talked Shastan out of the paisley pink tie and into something a bit more fitting for his skin tone.

“Is everyone OK?”

Kieran glanced back to where the staff were directing late-arriving guests to sit down, and nodded.

“It’s all fine, I’ll let you know.” The registrar was fiddling with the paperwork, which meant that Becca was somewhere else in the house having her interview completed. The venue had been her choice, an enormous stately home, the main ceremony hall with white marble columns and an ornate ceiling that made it look like some strange and celestial cathedral. There were flowers everywhere. Kieran felt sorry for any of their guests who had hay fever. “I swear we don’t actually know all these people Shas.”

“Becca has a big family.” Shastan half-turned and Kieran knocked his shoulder softly, “are Hayley and Brian here yet?”

“Yup.” Kieran turned back to the front. He knew it had been part a favour towards him that Shastan had invited them. “It’s time.”

“Hey,” Robin’s voice was soft as he half whispered, “hi Shas, you OK?”

Shastan nodded tightly, and Kieran could see the nervousness building across his shoulders.

“All set.” Robin touched his hand and the contact made Kieran’s heart race a little harder. “See you after.”

The registrar nodded to them, and Kieran felt a little bit of his heart leaving as Robin sat down. He glanced back to see where Robin was, the exact opposite seat from Kieran’s own, the other side of the aisle. He wore a traditional dove grey suit, a white shirt, and a skinny green tie which Kieran would have sworn matched the colour of his own eyes. And then the music started.

Kieran gave his cousin a last quick smile, folded his hands and faced front. In his peripheral vision he saw the bridesmaids arriving in their sleek pink dresses, and then the registrar smiled warmly. Kieran turned.

“Shas… Cus, you’ve gotta look.” He grinned at Becca, but she only had eyes for the back of Shastan. She was smiling, radiant, and though her gown looked like a pastry cream puff, Kieran could see that she was beautiful. “Turn round.”

When Shastan looked, his face lit up. He was a man in love.

*

“I think it went rather well, all things considered.” Robin stood at Kieran’s elbow, sipping at a glass of wine. “The music is a bit so-so, but the cake was nice.”

“You ate enough of it.”

“You said you didn’t want your bit!” Robin jabbed his bicep. “You should have said.”

Kieran smirked. Watching Robin enjoy desserts, even his desserts, was much, much more fun than eating them himself. They had been sat on opposite sides of the table for the wedding breakfast, a meal that was neither breakfast-like nor served at breakfast time, and Kieran had spent a long time watching Robin and ignoring his neighbour in the seating plan. The tables were too big to have allowed them to play footsy underneath, but Kieran hadn’t been the only one flashing teeth and dropping suggestive comments into the conversation where they wouldn’t be easily noticed. Kieran had never flirted, not like that, and he grinned every time Robin caught his eye; he couldn’t help it.

“At least Becca is too distracted now to glare at you.” Robin shook his head in gentle despair.

That hadn’t been such fun. As soon as the ceremony had been over, Kieran had angled for the welcome drinks when Becca had wrapped a manicured hand around his bicep and held him back.

“You want to explain why, in every single one of my wedding photos, you are intending to look like a teenage wannabe gangster?” She smiled suddenly, overly bright, as another guest came close. “Hello Auntie Jean. Aww, thank you, wasn’t it lovely. I’ll be right with you.” He voice dropped from its shrill falseness. “Explain!”

“Shastan and I-”

She cut him off mid-sentence.

“You are generally despicable Kieran. You are trying to ruin my wedding. Again!” Becca was doing her very best to keep a smiling face as she spoke, but she wasn’t managing very well. “You better not be-”

“Darling wife,” Shastan had wrapped an arm around his newly acquired bride, “Come introduce me to all these lovely people I haven’t met yet. Kier can tell you how lovely you look later.”

Kieran had rolled his eyes and mouthed ‘thanks cus’ to the groom, and Shastan had given him a thumbs up behind his back as they moved away. Whilst it hadn’t stopped Becca from giving him dirty looks during the professional photo shoot, she hadn’t said anything else. Now he watched his cousin and his bride sway on the dance floor, and watched Robin out of the corner of his eye.

“So, do your parents know I’m taking you home?” Kieran sipped at his cream soda. Shastan had allowed him to order them in specially, and Kieran had the Audi gleaming on the gravel driveway, ready to whisk them off. The country house was only half an hour out of town at the speeds Kieran drove, and though a lot of people were staying there overnight, Kieran had always planned on going home for the dogs. Shastan and Becca wouldn’t be returning at all, and would be flying out directly in the morning for the Caribbean.

“No,” Robin’s smile wavered a little bit, “I haven’t told anyone… It’s not that I’m not proud of you or anything I just-”

“Don’t wanna share,” Kieran finished for him. “It’s OK, neither do I.” Kieran cast about the room. Most people were dancing now, jumping up and down on the dance floor, laughing and giggling and taking selfies with their phones. Shastan and Becca were in the middle of it all, with eyes only for each other. He saw Brian and Hayley at the edge of the dance floor, marvelled at how his friend could still dance from a wheelchair with enough grace and style to make Hayley smile like that, and figured they would want time to enjoy themselves since they’d hired a babysitter. No one was paying him and Robin any attention. “Walk in the garden with me?”

Robin took his hand as they slipped out of the big glass doors, and Kieran took them off the main path and down a little gravel track which quickly vanished into trees, hedges and floral-bordered lawns. Gravel was not good for high-heels, and he figured very few, if any, other couples would have gone that way. As they passed between a pair of tall, dense fir hedges, Robin leant against his side, letting go of his hand to wrap an arm around his waist. Kieran turned slightly and kissed his hair, inhaling his clean cottony scent.

“Kier?”

“Mmm?” Kieran was slightly too distracted to want to form words. They had stopped walking, hidden in the shade of the big hedges, nothing but the stars up above them, the music wafting across the clear, cool air.

“So are you actually going to ask me out, or what?”

“What?” Kieran stared at him. “Um, I mean…” His heart was trying to smash its way out through his ribs, and for a mad, horrified second, Kieran wondered what had happened to all of his carefully groomed charm and charisma.

“’Cause I don’t sleep with people who aren’t my boyfriend.” Robin was grinning, swaying slightly and looking particularly pleased with himself. His confident smugness made Kieran feel suddenly weak at the knees.

Oh, little Sparrow’s got the drop on you boy. Kieran wondered when his inner voice had gotten so condescending. You’re such an easy mark. Go on, say something.

Kieran took a step back, held Robin’s hand, and looked at him. He was the same boy, in essence, that Kieran had met on Becca’s doorstep and who had, apparently unintentionally, driven him completely insane with wanting. He was still slightly mad with the amount of lust become desire turned to love that had built up in his system. But this version of Robin was smiling, watching him with happy, shining eyes, holding his hand and asking him, in a rather roundabout way, to be his boyfriend. It seemed like such a childish thing, a label kids used when it meant nothing: but this meant everything. To someone else, it might have seemed juvenile, but Kieran had never made a commitment to another person, not even one as simple as this.

“Sparrow?”

“Yes?” Robin smiled sweetly, innocence emanating from every pore.

“Will you be my boyfriend?”

Robin stood on tiptoes, hand on his cheek, the other on his collar, their lips millimetres away as he answered.

“Yes.”

Kieran kissed him, found himself again without the upper hand, and not minding, gave into Robin’s questing tongue, sliding his hands inside Robin’s suit jacket, pulling his shirt out from his trousers in order to lay hands on his skin. They were pressed together in the dark, holding each other tight, finding time for breaths between kisses that lasted longer than minutes. When Kieran knew it was either slow down or end up getting naked in the dark garden, he stopped to look at his new boyfriend, and found himself with his forehead touching Robin’s own.

“Dance with me.”

“OK.”

Robin put his arms over Kieran’s shoulders, fingers tickling his back as Kieran slid his hands around the boy’s waist, bringing them together in the quiet garden. There was just enough of the music to be heard for Kieran’s hips to begin to sway, and there they stayed, watching each other watch them back, swaying gently from side to side. When Robin lent up to whisper;

“Take me home.”

Kieran simply nodded, took his hand, and walked them to the car. There was no point in interrupting everyone else’s happiness just to say goodbye. It was quiet in the Audi, the engine humming under the long white bonnet, all noise dampened by the leather and the strong whooshing of his pulse in his ears. Robin lent on his shoulder, his arm linked softly with Kieran’s own on the gear stick, and there was nothing else between them as Kieran drove. They didn’t speak, there weren’t any useful words Kieran could come up with, and it felt like a moment of intense calm before what might come later. There was a promise, not spoken, that Kieran’s long wait was over. He had done enough, found and showed his true colours, and redeemed himself in Robin’s eyes. Just about.

Robin fussed over the dogs, and then went to get a drink in the kitchen while Kieran let them out for a quick toilet break and sniff around before sending them each to bed. The huskies were sleepy and gruff so late at night, and all too happy to return to the warm, dark den. Only Shadow cocked an ear when his maser told him to stay and be good, because while it was not unheard of for Kieran to leave them there for long periods and sometimes almost a whole night, it was still unusual. Kieran would miss his big fluffy bed-time companion, but not, he suspected, in a particularly vivid manner. Kieran caught up with his newly labelled boyfriend in the main hallway, staring up at the staircase as though it might lead to a distant planet.

“I wonder what’s up there.”

Kieran wrapped both arms around Robin and pulled him tight against his chest. He exhaled in Robin’s ear and felt the boy shudder.

“You wanna go find out?” It was the last confidently cocky phrase that Kieran managed, because Robin turned in his arms, kissed him soundly and grinned like an imp.

“Catch me!”

While Kieran was standing, staring perplexedly at the boy, Robin pulled away and dashed up the stairs. Kieran chased after him. He was taller, rangier, and he knew the house better, but Kieran didn’t really want to catch his prey: the fun lay in the chase after all. Robin taunted him around the far side of the landing table, a place where Kieran often began the process of abandoning keys and clothes, then streaked away up the last set of stairs to Kieran’s doorway. Inside the one long, enormous room, Robin stopped, too dumbstruck to keep running, and Kieran grabbed him.

They kissed, rough and almost vicious, and Kieran happily let Robin take the lead on exactly what the boy wanted. Standing by the dais on which sat Kieran’s huge and, under the circumstances, rather virginal, bed, it was suddenly too much to be dressed. They fought to get their hands inside each other’s clothes, and Kieran removed Robin from his jacket and tore open his shirt. Buttons scattered.

“Ah!”

“I’ll buy you a new one.”

Robin kissed him hard enough to clack their teeth together and press Kieran’s half healed lip hard enough to split it again. Robin grinned with Kieran’s blood painting his lips red, wound his fingers into Kieran’s hair, and then they were hurrying again to strip each other of their clothes. New skin was revealed, Robin’s chest faintly tan from having been outside without his top on at some indeterminate point, and Kieran couldn’t wait, he had to explore. His lips abandoned Robin’s as his fingers traced the shape of his lightly muscled abdomen, kissing his collarbone, tracing down his chest towards one nipple. Robin’s fingers on his chin brought him back up, and Kieran half purred as he traded the sweet-saltiness of Robin’s skin for the very sweet wine-and-cake flavour of his lips.

They tripped, getting out of shoes and socks, still kissing as Robin’s hands deftly loosed Kieran’s belt and pulled down trousers and underwear, leaving him bare. Kieran grabbed for him, but Robin pushed him back, and Kieran fell onto the bed, kicking off the remnants of his clothes, exposing himself to his boyfriend’s view. The man he loved smiled widely.

“Awesome.”

Robin stripped out of the rest of his suit, looking like some lovely young executive fresh from the office and ready to relieve himself. His clothes puddled with Kieran’s and he knelt over his lover. Kieran wasted no time in sitting up to kiss him again.

The sensation of kissing Robin with skin-on-skin was so amazing that Kieran though that he would be perfectly happy if that were all they did. Then Robin snaked a hand between them and wrapped his fingers around Kieran’s impressive erection and the dark-skinned young man found himself quickly re-evaluating that opinion. Robin grinned at him, pleased as punch with his prize, and he was not at all shy as he stroked Kieran’s quivering flesh, grinning cockily and maintaining eye contact. Kieran hadn’t been with anyone in a long time who had taken control so readily, and he moaned against Robin’s shoulder, pressed lips and teeth against the boy’s smooth skin. Robin practically growled in his ear, turning Kieran’s spine into jelly, and his fingers became tight around his erection, stroking with greater purpose.

“What do you like?” Robin spoke between kisses, lips never leaving his skin.

“You.” Kieran found the soft skin of Robin’s neck below his ear. “Anything.”

“Anything?” Robin took his chin, brushed his thumb over Kieran’s damaged lip, smiling in a deeply proprietary manner. “Really?” he arched an eyebrow, “I just figured you for a top.”

Kieran groaned at the combination of Robin’s fingers on the heat between them and the boy’s delightful smile. Kieran lost focus on his lips as they kissed again.

“I’m flexible.”

Robin smirked.

“I’ll bet.”

Kieran kissed him hard, but was unprepared for Robin’s strength. He gasped as both of Robin’s palms on his sternum pushed him flat onto his back and into the mattress. Robin grinned.

“While you’re down there…”

Kieran grabbed Robin’s hips and pulled the boy willingly towards him. Robin gasped, bracing himself against the carved mahogany headboard as Kieran took his hard-on between his lips and swallowed.

“Ahhh!” Robin pushed his fingers into Kieran’s hair, wrapping his fist in the thick black silk. Kieran moaned, opening his throat to press his nose against Robin’s pelvis, loving the sudden loss of control he felt under the boy. “Dear god, you’re good at that.”

Well, you’ve had a lot of practice…

Shut up, Kieran barked at his internal voice, this is different.

Hell yeah it is. This is better.

Kieran ran his hands up Robin’s torso, touching his nipples, reaching for his face. Robin grabbed his hand, kissed his fingers, bit softly at his wrist. Kieran moaned around him.

It’s not polite to talk with your mouth full.

Kieran didn’t care.

When Robin backed off, he groaned with disappointment, but Robin bent double and kissed him.

“Sparrow…”

“Oh believe me, I wanna keep enjoying that,” Robin grinned between kisses, “but if I do, I’m not gonna get to enjoy this.” He snuck his hand between Kieran’s body and the mattress to man handle his arse. “You have…?”

“In the dresser.” Kieran panted. He ran his hands over as much of Robin’s body as he could while the boy got what they needed. Kieran was almost ashamed to of what Robin would be looking at in his top drawer; no one could accuse Kieran of being badly stocked. When Robin sat back over him, he was holding a bottle of flavoured lube and a half handful of condoms in different coloured wrappers.

“Selection box?” Robin arched an eyebrow at him. “Seriously, you own like ten different kinds of rubbers,” he tilted his head to one side, “which ones do you wear?”

“The gold ones,” Kieran admitted.

Robin chuckled. Just when Kieran thought that the whole thing might be some enormous joke, Robin stroked his length with an open palm, then measured the length of his erection along his forearm.

“I’ll bet you do,” the boy grinned and jerked his chin, “get comfy.”

Kieran couldn’t tear his eyes away from Robin, watching him select a condom and roll the super thin latex down the length of his warm-pink cock. He reached over his head for pillows, one under his head, the one in the small of his back. It had been a long time since Kieran had found himself on his back with his legs apart. Robin knelt between his thighs, pushing his knees up, and Kieran gasped at the sensation of slick wet fingers between the mounds of his arse.

“How long?”

“Umm…”

“C’mere…” Robin coaxed him up for a kiss, and Kieran was distracted enough by Robin’s tongue to groan rather than wince as Robin breached him. “Oh fuck…”

Kieran growled with pleasure, rocked his hips up to meet Robin’s too-gentle thrust, and realised that it had been a long time for him too. The boy ran his hands up Kieran’s torso, then back to his knees as he thrust again. This time he wasn’t too-gentle, and Kieran moaned through gritted teeth in a mix of pleasure and pain at the invasion. Robin licked his teeth and wrapped a free hand around Kieran’s erection.

“This ain’t gonna last long if you keep doing that.” Kieran groaned, digging his fingers into the mattress.

Robin pulled back, and stilled. When Kieran groaned, trying to shift his hips closer to Robin, the boy clamped both hands on his hips and pinned him down.

“Nuh-uh.” Robin kissed him, without pushing himself further into Kieran’s warm flesh; it was suddenly torture. “I’m gonna keep you on edge all night.”

“Bastard.”

“That’s your job.” Robin kissed his cheek. “I love you.”

Kieran didn’t break eye contact a single time after that.