mollyhousemouse

Oh yes, some was done. And done well. But little ol' me was copied on all the emails. it's mostly catch up. there were no horrible surprises. it's just, a lot. thanks Kitt. i felt you going into mama bear circle the wagons mode on my behalf. and it made me smile

sigh.... i knew it would bad i worked through strategies yesterday with my therapist and thank all the gods i did. from almost 500 at 8:30 to just under 200 emails now. hope y'all are doing well.

no meal prep done, but that's OK good video call session with therapist; did some journaling; laundry washed, dried, & folded; bathroom wiped down; my bag is reset for work; menu has been planned. we're calling it a win. almost bedtime now so i'll say it's good to be back here with friends. sleep well everyone

thank You. i'll pass it along He's doing much better now that He's on the other side of it.

i think you should. Finding a practice with all those things is rare

Spent a very long week in rural Nebraska paying last respects to Phil's father. Feels good to be back home. Tomorrow i'll have a session with my therapist while He goes to hit golf balls. i think i'll see what red onions are going for and make some pickled onions. i'll get some meal prepping done. chopping onions, maybe scrounging the freezer for stuff to make broth with.

i am so sorry. i hope they were able to help

That's hot With respect Michael Sir

i can't wait to discover what James and Mateo find. well done tim

i've always loved Sci Fi. i think i'm going to love this one too. ❤️

Happy Friday! billing went off without a hitch, great conversation with a new operations manager who had no clue about our systems or what"progressive billing" was, handled a client call, and early release with a "good job this week" Phil had burgers ready for the grill ❤️ i made a loaf of potato bread for the weekend and we watched the splash down of Integrity in the Pacific Ocean i hope that everyone here had a good day and has good plans for the weekend

thanks You Sir my inner dialogue is a recurring theme in my sessions. i'm also using like affirmations around my work space i'm so glad that tim is ble to talk to himself in such a way to get out of that trap. my therapist congratulated me in my progress recently and that felt good

i want to thank everyone who took the time to read and comment. Or just read. my journey is far from over, in fact today i sent a message to my therapist "will i ever be able to hear "hey let's talk about the schedule." without that feeling." i want you to know that i appreciate all the support from here. 💜

Who am i? It’s a question i think we all ask from time to time. i've been asking that a lot recently. i’m doing some work on myself, talking with a therapist almost weekly and it’s been a really good thing. Except. i'm discovering that i’m not who i thought i was. Kind of. i’ve discovered that i really am “good enough” and that “good enough” isn’t “average” or “meh” in the way that it was in my head. “Good enough” always had a negative connotation. But it’s not really a negative. So, yeah, i am good enough. i’ve discovered that i am damn good. That the fear that was activating, ramping up, encouraging my anxious responses was just that, fear. It wasn’t that i wasn’t “good enough” or “a failure.” It was that i had thought, i had believed, that i wasn’t damn good or good enough or that i was a failure. Some of that was input from authority figures growing up, from other managers, other authority figures in past jobs. Almost a brainwashing… although i’m not sure if my therapist would agree with that term. The process hasn’t been, won’t be, easy. Just saying those things isn’t enough, i have to believe them, honestly in my heart and in my head believe them. The thing is this isn’t just how it affects my professional life. i’ve uncovered how it affected my personal life. That i am worthy of the love i receive, i am worthy to see myself the way Phil sees me, i am confident in what i do. So, who am i now? I’m still figuring that out. i am confident, capable and worthy. i am “damn good, not just good enough.” i am not a failure.

Happy Friday i hope to be around more