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    Aditus
  • Aditus
  • Author
  • 04/10/2015
  • 120 Words
  • 838 Views
  • 9 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Crack In The Wall - 1. Crack In The Wall

Thick mortar embraces solid bricks.

Its foundation deep, its structure high.

There could just as well be the river Styx,

and no money to pay the ferryman. Aye.

 

Strong and sturdy, it faces the time.

Its depth infinite, its width endless.

No one will be able to make the climb,

and no wings to carry those memories. Unless.

 

Quiet and hidden, it yet appears.

Its size deceptive, its meaning clear.

A crack is forming, after countless years,

and nothing will stop it from conquering. Fear.

 

Wide chasms break down my solid wall.

The rifts are growing, their progress fast.

Light chases darkness and dispels it all,

And I remember you. I dare. At last.

I had to let go of it to be on time. I'll be extremely grateful for your thought on this one. It's special. (for me)
Copyright © 2015 aditus; All Rights Reserved.
  • Like 9
  • Love 1
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Former Member

This is very emotional poem, as I suppose the 'wall' is equated with death in several ways, and yet it can crumble and let some personal light shine through. Remembering the one; I feel that's also very sweet and intimate here.

 

And if you'll allow me to be a Poetry-Prompt-Geek for a moment, lol, I really enjoy the structure and discipline you've shown us in this poem! You've developed a unique quatrain structure and held true to it throughout; you let a consistent metre build the intensity of the poem for you (and that is one of it's greatest attributes to use!); and you chose straightforward and unadorned rhymes to make your message memorable. This is a very concise poem, and I like it a lot!

Aditus
On 04/25/2015 04:38 AM, Cole Matthews said:
I had a sense of permanency and solidity that looked indominable but within the edifice was a flaw. The flaw was a fear and it would take down the immovable object like a bulldozer never could. Very powerful and fascinating stuff. I loved it.
Thank you, Cole. :) Fear itself appears indomitable at times, it needs to be conquered. I'm fairly new to poetry, I'm glad you loved it.
Aditus
On 04/25/2015 06:08 AM, AC Benus said:
This is very emotional poem, as I suppose the 'wall' is equated with death in several ways, and yet it can crumble and let some personal light shine through. Remembering the one; I feel that's also very sweet and intimate here.

 

And if you'll allow me to be a Poetry-Prompt-Geek for a moment, lol, I really enjoy the structure and discipline you've shown us in this poem! You've developed a unique quatrain structure and held true to it throughout; you let a consistent metre build the intensity of the poem for you (and that is one of it's greatest attributes to use!); and you chose straightforward and unadorned rhymes to make your message memorable. This is a very concise poem, and I like it a lot!

The first stanza happened to come out as it did, and I had to simply accept its form and write the others accordingly.

Be all the Poetry-Prompt-Geek you want. I will come back and read your comment again and again, especially when I struggle with the words again.

 

Thank you so much! :hug:

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