Star Crossed: On the Line - 14. Starshine's Last Breath

It is just silent as the orange glow of Ember disappears. I can’t even move. I reach a hand forward but only feel the cool air of Earth.

I flinch as cheering and clapping erupts all around me. Cries of joy are heard from everyone and laughing spreads around. I almost want to yell at them. It would do no good. Mekaias would have most likely gotten mad if I were to do so.

I fall to my knees where the portal was placed. A line of grass has been burnt black, a small flame still stands between my knees before the night air blows it out.

I concentrate only on the bond that connects me to Mekaias. I can feel everything. Strong emotions fill my head. Fear is a big one. Pain is another. Frustration is even there.

I feel my eyes begin to water as spikes of pain continue to grow in my chest and spread to my body. I...I don’t even know if the destruction of the city will take him before his own powers do. He is so tired, yet I feel that he is fighting back. Why? Why must he allow himself to experience more pain?

A hand rests on my shoulder and I look up to see Remy and Remy standing behind me. The sound of grass being stepped is next to me and then I find Alicia sitting next to me, her hand on my arm.

I turn my gaze to the patch of burnt ground in front of me. I lift my hand to my chest. The pain is almost unbearable. I can’t even imagine what Mekaias is going through.

The last look he gave me. I will never be able to make it disappear from my mind. He looked...ready. As if he had accepted this. I realize now that I am stupid to not have realized it earlier. Of course he is ready. The things he has gone through...anyone would probably want to die when the chance was given. I just have to live with the fact that I did not do enough to keep him safe. I screwed up and look where it got him.

My hatred for myself soon is overpowered by another feeling. There is a deeply warm feeling of love. The fear has disappeared and the pain no longer bothers me. Surely he hasn’t gone yet? Is he looking into the face of death at this moment? Is he having his life flash before his eyes? Why would he feel love when he is about to die?

Tears begin to fall and I squint my eyes shut. I brace myself. I am waiting for it. When I no longer feel anything in the bond. When I will feel that empty presence in my mind that just lets me know that my life is missing what it needs most.

I knew of some Metonians who have lost their soulmate. Some even lost them before they could have met them. They said it isn’t so bad since they never got to meet them. Deep down, you could tell in their eyes. They knew they were missing something special and it hurt them. Metonians who lost their soulmates after meeting them...I don’t want that. Yet it’s coming.

Still I feel Mekaias in the bond. How is he still alive? Surely he should have been gone by now. This isn’t something I am missing is it? Do we keep the last emotion of our soulmates? Nobody ever said such a thing was true.

I bite my lip hard and then I stand. A thought comes into my mind.

“Remelia, or Alicia, I need one of you to bring a truck.” I say and run for the woods.

~~
~~

The portal closes and I fall onto my knees. I take deep breaths and clench my fists. Why does everything hurt? I didn’t even hold either of those things open for long.

I turn to the building behind me. Somehow it is perfectly free of any damage. Surely it won’t be safe for long.

I push myself off the ground and as soon as I take a step forward, I fall again. I groan in frustration and look over my shoulder. Mostly checking to make sure everyone has crossed. I would hate to have anyone else here with me.

A small stone falls next to my leg and I look up. A sharp rock is shaking on the ceiling and then it begins to fall.

I roll as far away as I can and then cover my face with my arms. The ground shakes from the impact and then sharp shards of stone hit my arms. I barely even feel them but I feel blood begin to spill. I turn them over and see cuts scattered everywhere.

I huff out a breath and I try to stand again. Fuck it. I pant as I walk to the edge of stairways. With a deep breath, I throw myself with my back to the air. Instantly the suit comes to life and I have to try and steady myself. I run into the wall of a house below and I grunt from the impact.

I grip onto it and look back at the large building up top. I want to be up there if I am going to die here. One last view of the place before it is gone.

With a whine, I push with my legs off the wall and angle myself for the roof. The suit carries me for a good awhile but then it starts to beep. Shit. It desperately needs to charge.

The suit begins to drift downwards and I reach my hands up in time before the suit turns off completely.

I grab onto the edge of the roof and try to pull myself over. I groan loud as I hook my foot over the edge and heave myself over.
I roll onto my back and breathe hard. I rest my hand on my chest. It feels so tight there. As if everything is being squeezed and rearranged.

I lay my head to the side and watch the city crumbling to pieces. Another piece of the ring in the sky falls down into the marketplace and then a loud groaning starts.

I can’t take my eyes off of it. It is terrifying. Maybe I can make this easier for me.

I try to move my arm but the pain causes me to cry out and give up on that idea.

The groaning grows louder and then a snarl of lava erupts from down under the bridge. My eyes go wide as it splashes everywhere and then the ground seems to split into pieces.

Some rise and some sink down. About a few hundred feet under, is hot lava. It bubbles as buildings, cars, and pieces of the bridge are swallowed.

The way the ground lifts and sinks reminds me of what an ocean would look like. It is almost pretty in a way. Maybe I can be at peace with this.

I close my eyes and just listen to the sounds.

The sounds begin to grow quieter and quieter. The darkness behind my eyelids soothe me from the destruction.

~~
~~

“Where are we going?” Alicia asks. She practically fought Remelia for the wheel. Remelia was a little shocked by that but decided to let her have it.

“Just drive straight that way through the forest.” I say pointing the direction that was behind our old house. I decided to look around it since we haven’t been there in a long time.

Everything seemed untouched aside from Remelia and Remy’s room. That is, until I went into my room.Well it was for the most part, untouched. I saw that the picture of our squad was gone. I was guessing that Firelight took it away. Possibly to hide it from Mekaias.

“No, I am pretty sure he found it himself and took it.” She told me. She was looking around my room. I am guessing with a look of guilt, especially when she saw the tons of bottles on the ground. Yeah...not my best moment. I am glad he took it. Maybe that was the only reason we stayed alive in that last mission. Though, if that meant that I would lose Mekaias soon, I don't if I wish he actually did kill me.

Out here in the forest, you can still hear the cheers of the aliens and Firelight who were saved by Mekaias. He did an incredible thing. Anyone could see that and he deserved recognition for it. I will make sure of it.

Alicia is careful as she drives around tall trees, sometimes it seems like she’ll hit one of them but she is deeply concentrated on getting to our destination fast.

“Where exactly are we going?” Remelia asks the question that Alicia asked earlier. I really should just say what it is. I don’t know why even now I feel like I should keep it from them. They have to go in there with me after all. I just wanted it to only be Mekaias and I’s special place.

“A cave. It is um...our cave.” I look down at the floor of the truck. She nods before turning back to the front.

“He will be there. I am sure of it!” Alicia tries to lighten the mood, and I am grateful for it, but I really don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing. This is more of a ‘last chance’ decision.

I close my eyes and just wait till we get to the open field. When Alicia is there, then I will open my eyes. Every time I blink I just see the look on his face when he looks up scared. The pain and tiredness in his eyes. I hurts me to think about it. It is a constant reminder that I have failed him and that I keep failing him.

~~
~~

I jerk awake as a loud booming sound goes off nearby. I look over and see that the city is...no longer a city. There are so many pieces of the ground that have shifted into the air. They look like those pictures of oceans that I’ve seen online. The water is frozen in the air, forever locked in place.

These will not stay locked in place, however. They will sink down into the lava below soon. It has risen a lot higher since I last looked. It has gotten a lot hotter in here because of it.

I tug on the zippers of my suit and try and take it off. It’s far too hot for that. With a lot of pained effort, it is finally off. I toss it over the edge. It belonged to Firelight anyway. Wearing it was almost as bad as my tattoos.

I run my finger over my cheek. It doesn’t hurt to move as much as before. Though, being so damn tired for nothing is a huge factor in this. The small rest was nice I guess. Just not at all enough. Using my legs however, is a big 'no thanks.' Just trying to kick the suit off was agony. I almost wanted to just keep the pants on, but I do not want to die with any Firelight colors on me.

I frown after realizing something. I never asked if my tattoos bothered Norian. I just assumed they were normal to him. After being on Earth, I know it isn’t normal at all. They don’t have the slave tattoos that Utrio has. I guess it is not going to matter now.

I turn onto my side but doing that hurts much more than laying on my back so I just decide to keep as I was before.

The ground near the bridge entrance begins to tremble. Cracks begins to form and then they begin to sink into the ground. I guess it is finally coming. I’ve been waiting almost eleven years for this. It was bound to happen.

I just keep my eyes on the ground as it falls, it creeps closer and closer every second. I can barely keep my eyes open right now. I don’t exactly want to sleep through this. Maybe the fall will finally overcome the pain that I am feeling now. I already feel like I am being burned alive, maybe a little lava can do the trick.

I move my arm slowly over the edge. For what reason, I don’t know. Just felt like something to do.

I lose vision of where the ground is sinking and wait for it.

Cracking echoes below me and then the building starts to shake. I give a small smile as my eyes before to water. I don’t know if Norian would ever be able to tell, but he really did give me the safest time in my life. Constantly running and hiding all my life, being used and tortured for so long. That small period of time with him was the best time in my life. I will forever be thankful for it.

The building groans and the sound of it splitting goes off behind my head and then my body is sliding over the edge.

Everything seems to slow at this moment. The fall should be fast but I feel like I am slowly floating down.

The lava below is glowing orange and red. It is a lot farther down than I realized.

I hope Norian heard me before the portal closed. He should know that I really did love him. I would hate if he felt like this was his fault. It wasn’t. If anything, it was my fault. I chose to stay by and trust George when I just had a feeling that there was something wrong with him. I even chose to go after him alone. It’s my fault that I am here.

Promising me that I will be safe is just not something someone can make. Not if I am the one looking for trouble.

My body slowly turns away from the lava and then I am looking at the sky. I can barely see the hole in the sky. I bite through the pain of moving my limbs and reach for my necklace. I snatch it off my neck and pull the piece of Norian’s horn out. I kiss it and then hold it tight in my hands and keep it close to my chest.

I then close my eyes, waiting for the end.

Instead, I feel a scorching pain on my ear, that causes me to cry out but then I feel cold air. I open my eyes before I run straight into a dark rocky wall. Instantly my vision goes dark.

~~
~~

“Did you hear that?” I ask when we reach the cave entrance.

The girls nod and look at each other. I don’t even care to turn my flashlight on, I sprint past the entrance and make my way through. Years of coming here has made it easy to know my way around in the dark.

I finally reach the open part of the cave and then my heart just about stops. On the ground is Mekaias. His legs are submerged in the small pool of water. He isn’t wearing any clothes, aside from his underwear. I run over to him and see that a bit of the top of one ear is missing. Where it once was is just steam coming off it.

Cuts are all over his arms and the color in his skin isn’t the rich brown it should be. It's paled from lack of blood. I press a finger to his neck and then rest my ear to his chest. He’s alive!

I hear rocks being kicked around as footsteps run into the area. It’s Alicia and Remelia.

“He’s alive!” I grin but then I realize he desperately needs help. “Remelia, we need to get to the regeneration room.” She nods and immediately turns with Alicia trailing after her. Alicia does stop for a second to make sure I don’t need any help, but I pick up Mekaias as if he weighs nothing.

I keep my arms under his knees and his back. He starts to move a bit in my arms.

“Hey.” I whisper and feel tears begin to fall. He tries to lift his head up but then I feel a huge amount of pain erupts in my head. It is like I am burning from the inside. I just about drop him as I fall to my knees. I refuse to let him go and just shake my head through the pain.

Alicia hurries to my side and helps me to stand. Slowly but surely, we make it to the back of the truck. I hop on and cradle Mekaias in my arms.

Mekaias barely moves his head and then I see pretty purple eyes looking up at me. He can barely manage to open them and it has me scared.

“Hey there, Starshine.” I say and lean down to kiss his forehead. He keeps one hand to his chest and closes his eyes from the touch. As soon as he closes his eyes, his head starts to roll back. “No, no, no. Mekaias.” I am careful not to shout in fear and try to shake him to keep him awake.

“You have to stay awake ok?” I say and run my hand against his cheek. I just know if he closes those pretty eyes that he will be gone. He is hanging on by a thin thread of life right now. I can feel it and it is terrifying.

“It hurts.” He whines, his voice is raspy and he chokes on his words. He coughs a bit into my chest and then I see blood on my shirt. He doesn’t seem to notice and tries to close his eyes again.

“I know, baby. I know” I gently lift his head up higher to wake him and he groans from the movement. “You just gotta stay awake for a little longer, I promise.” I try to ignore the pain I am feeling in my head but fuck does it hurt.

His breathing starts to get shaky and then he looks up at me again. “Can you sing for me?” He whispers before he winces. A pain spikes in my chest. I try not to show any pain as well but he sees it anyway. “Am I hurting you?”

“No! No.” I shake my head and hug him close. “I...I don’t know what to sing.”

“The song from before. When you found me in the shower.” I frown at the memory of that. Seeing him seconds away from harming himself. Yeah I remember exactly what he was talking about.

“It’s not really a song though. It just a small tune my mother would sing to me and my siblings if we were having a tantrum.” I huff a small laugh and he smiles.

He doesn’t say anything and I assume that is his way of telling me to start. I hope the truck isn’t too loud. All I can do is hum it.

I start humming and he tries to push himself closer to my chest. I pull him closer to me and continue. I kiss his head and glance down to see he has my horn piece in his hand. I close my eyes and let myself into the song.

My mother used to say it is about how two soulmates travel long and far to get together. I guess that fits perfectly for this. Though I have heard that it means other stories. I think I'll just accept my mother's story.

The song lasts long enough that we are finally parked in front of the old main building.

“We’re here, Starshine!” I grin and look down at him. He doesn’t move. My grin disappears immediately. “Mekaias?” I try and shake him awake but his head just falls back onto my arm. I keep trying to shake him awake and then run my hand against his cheek. “Come on, Mekaias! Stay with me. Please!” I get up and run straight inside. I check the elevator to see if it works. It will take forever for it to get up here.
I run for the stairs and keep Mekaias tight in my arms. As soon as I’ve gone down six floors down, I burst through the door with my back, Remelia and Alicia on my heels.

I turn to the regen room and immediately shoulder my way through the door. I move to the center of the room and Remelia closes the door behind me. Almost instantly the blue lights are turned on.

I sit on the ground with Mekaias held tight in my arms. “Come on, baby! You can do this.” I brush his hair off his face and rock him back and forth. I keep him close to my chest and keep my eyes closed. Praying to whatever god is out there to help my Mekaias. I need him with me. I can’t just lose him after coming this close!

When about five minutes go by, I just break down and bury my face into his hair. I cry and keep him close to me. He just won’t move. Why won’t he move? I kiss his forehead over and over. I am not even sure if that will even work. Something has to work right? What the fuck am I supposed to do?

I grip onto his arm tight and lift it to kiss his hands. “I’m so sorry!” I keep whispering that over and over. His hand flops onto his stomach when I hold it too gently. I hold it tight and keep his hand to my cheek.

I let out a long shaky breath and close my eyes. I did this. I screwed up. I fucking killed my soulmate.

“Should we turn it off?” Alicia says behind the window. I don’t hear Remelia’s response.

A groan under me makes me freeze.

I glance down and see a pained expression on Mekaias’ face.

“Norian?” He whispers and then slowly opens his eyes. “You’re hurting me.” He squints up at me before wiggling his fingers against my cheek and tries to pull it away.

I huff a small laugh before leaning down and kissing him all over his perfect face. “I love you.” I chant over and over, as if it’s a hymn of my life.

He smiles against the assault and reaches out with both hands to hold my face. “I love you too.” He pulls me down to his lips. I gladly kiss him back.

As soon as he pulls back, he says, “Can we possibly retire or something? I don’t think I can handle this life for much longer.” I chuckle and kiss him again.

“Anything for you, Starshine.”

“Thank you, yun Undaegon.”