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    AC Benus
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The content presented here is for informational or educational purposes only. These are just the authors' personal opinions and knowledge.
Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are based on the authors' lives and experiences and may be changed to protect personal information. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Zero to Hero, a Guide - 6. Poetry Prompt 4 – Metre

...looking for a sure way to get people to hate you? Post a prompt challenge on Metre! hehe...
Hang in there, guys. Deep breaths -- in and out; in and out :) 
 

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Poetry Prompt 4 – Metre

Let's Write in various Metres! The Basics

 

What elevates a mere ramble of words to the level of verse? Metre is the answer. If a line goes:

 

I went to the store yesterday to buy a loaf of bread

 

It is ordinary. However, if the same words are reconsidered with an eye for flow and rhythm, you can achieve this:

 

To the store I went yesterday

To buy a loaf of bread.

 

Instantly there is melody. Music makes it poetic, and it has the power to reach out to a reader even though the content stays utterly ordinary. Now, don’t get me wrong; I said it was poetry, but not great poetry. It’s an example where the heart is purposefully not engaged so we can easily focus on the structure alone.

Considering these two versions of the same line, it’s arguable the first is soulless; the second one has potential for deeper allusions not yet revealed to the reader.

So now, let’s look at the specific rhythm our poetic example is displaying.

(to THE)(store I)(went YES)(ter-DAY)

(to BUY)(a LOAF)(of BREAD)

 

Clearly my breakdown exaggerates the natural flow, but I do it so you see the Metre. One way you will see poetic beats broken down is some combination of a dash and the letter u. In our example, each two-part beat in the parentheses would be shown like this: –U. The first word or sound is unaccented, or soft. The second one is stressed naturally when you read or say it in English. Think of this basic combination like the 0s and 1s of computer language, and when they are structured in poetry are called “a foot.” So, in our example above, how many metrical feet are there in the first line? How many in the second?[1]

The combination of –U is called iambic, or specifically, an iambic foot.[2] But let’s look at how the example can be rearranged again to form a different foot, for not only is –U possible, but so is U– where the stressed word or sound leads off.

(to BUY)(a LOAF)(of BREAD) = 3 iambic feet

(A loaf)(OF bread)(TO buy) = 3 trochee feet.

 

Time for examples in action. How about some famous couplets; Helen Hunt Jackson first.

 

Bee to the blossom, moth to the flame;

Each to his passion, what’s in a name.

 

And then why don’t we pick up something from ole Billy Shakespeare.

 

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

 

How do these break down? Let me do them for you, but remember, soon you’ll be on your own and asked to do the same with new lines. However, Helen’s lines can be dissected to show us:

 

(BEE to)(THE blos)(SUM, moth)(TO the FLAME)

(EACH to)(HIS pas)(SHUN, what’s)(IN a NAME).

 

So, what are we looking at here? What kind of feet and how many? Well, we know the U– rhythm is a trochee, so we can see 3 trochees, but then the line ends with a three-beat rhythm. So now you see metrical feet can also contain a pattern like U–U, as in our example above. Not to be too technical and overload you with new terms, but this pattern is known as a cretic foot.

And Shakespeare’s example?

 

(if this be)(ER-ror)(and UP)(on me PROVED)

(i nev-ver)(WRIT nor)(no MAN)(ev-ver LOVED)

 

Whoa! I can see you shaking your head. You think I’ve gone off the deep end, but honestly, I think you can handle it. You are beginning to see lines in their metrical construction and get a feel for how the rhythms can vary based on what you need as ‘your music’ in the poem. That fact is, the combination and use of Metre is endless, just like the 0s and 1s of our computer language. The sky’s the limit on creativity and expression; Metre is a tool for you to use just like any other.

But specifically, what has Shakespeare done in this couplet? First off, we can see he built two equal lines of 4 metrical feet, beginning and ending each line with three beats. They break down as follows:

 

(if this be) = 1 tribrach foot

(ER-ror) = 1 trochee foot

(and UP) = 1 iambic foot

(on me PROVED) = 1 anapaest

The second line repeats this exact pattern, which I find extremely impressive, as the poet even creates an internal rhyme on ror-nor.

How do Metre and syllable counts in lines correspond? Shakespeare’s W.H. Sonnets are a marvel to study. He is no slave to iambic pentameter (a line with 5 perfect iambic feet), and oftentimes his lines will vary from strict Metre entirely with one extra syllable at the end. Naturally, that is all right; he showed what’s important in the poem is the emotional content, not being a dumb slave to a da-DUM rhythm. In this regard, there is no conflict between constructing lines of verse based on syllable counts, be is 5 and 7 for Japanese forms, or 6 and 8 for Lyric patterns, or the 10 and 12 of narrative poems like Sonnets and Ballades. A closer adherence to syllable counts is more desirable, while oftentimes a relentless march of da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM is an absolute hindrance to your message getting across. Please keep that in mind.

The study of Metre within the context of verse is called Prosody, and it’s a huge science all on its own. Knowing the endless list of names has little or nothing to do with writing good metrical poetry per se. It’s an abstract dissecting better left to scientific minds. What we as poets need is a feel for Metre, for I believe every poet worth his salt must gain a consciousness of it – especially to write free verse!!!! – but ultimately we must move beyond a slavish adherence to da-DUM, da-DUM to let our visions flow.

But thanks to the internet, the minutiae of Prosody is at the fingertips. The following webpages are good for varying reasons.

Here is an excellent and concise breakdown of the basic categories of Metre operating in the English language.

http://www.writing.upenn.edu/~afilreis/88/meter.html

For this next item, the chart on the righthand side of this page shows an excellent summary of both two-part and three-part metrical feet. This is a handy guide to perhaps print out and tape in your poetry notebook.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cretic

And finally, Wiki’s main article on Metre is exhaustive (lol), but only go there once you have a feel for how Metre works. The entry provides much too much information on the difference between English-language Metre and the original Greek and Latin models that inspired it. You can come back later, after you are a master :) 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metre_(poetry)

 

The Prompt: print out the following poem and read it out loud several times.[3] Then jot down the Metre you uncover, line by line, using the parentheses and (BOLD/un-bold) method from above. There is no right or wrong answer; it’s all up to how the rhythms sound to your ear. Then, after you have a metrical roadmap, write your own five-lined poem to match it. Don’t worry about the rhymes, in fact, don’t worry about anything. This is practice to get the mouth-feel of the stressed and unstressed syllables. Just start grouping words together to build up the patterns you uncovered. The goal is for your poem to have the same musical lilt as the original when read out loud.

 

Eternity

by Samuel Waddington

 

‘Of old,’ spake the priest; spake the parson and preacher –

‘After death, O my Friends, after death is Eternity.’

‘Not so,’ cries my Spirit, ‘not so, O wise teacher!

It was, and it is, and it ever shall be –

Now, now is Eternity! Is it for thee?’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


[1] Four feet in the first line; three feet in the second. Each metrical foot is shown in parentheses.

[2] Thereby, we can tell our example has four iambic feet in the first line, and three iambic feet in the second.

[3] It’s essential you read it out loud. Your mission is to hear what the poem sounds like, not to judge it by what it looks like on the paper.

_

Copyright © 2019 AC Benus; All Rights Reserved.
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The content presented here is for informational or educational purposes only. These are just the authors' personal opinions and knowledge.
Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are based on the authors' lives and experiences and may be changed to protect personal information. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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4 hours ago, Lyssa said:

This is a brilliant explanation about the complex theory behind metre. Even the rhythm is not as easy to create in English for me as in my own language (logically), your examples are very understandable and helpful. Thank you Muha ❤️

Thank you. Lyssa. The "trick" is not to teach Metre at all, but to open the mind to thinking about spotting it in everyday rhythms. Thanks again for your encouragement  

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1 hour ago, Parker Owens said:

Waddington, read aloud slowly, ruminated over and digested thoughtfully, is like having port and chocolate. A delight for the senses and the ear, particularly. 

Wonderful encouragement, Parker! Obviously, this prompt was not easy to do, and I still have doubts. Metre is something every versifier must pack under their belt, if not to learn like an academic, to then at least absorb and move beyond. Thanks again.    

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i have started ... and written something ... i used bolding but i'm not sure about the brackets.. it sounds right to my ears though..

 

I'll post what i have done here ... the poem i wrote.. was just in my head after reading Waddington's poem aloud several times:

 

‘Of old,’ spake the priest; spake the parson and preacher –

‘After death, O my Friends, after death is Eternity.’

‘Not so,’ cries my Spirit, ‘not so, O wise teacher!

It was, and it is, and it ever shall be

Now, now is Eternity! Is it for thee?’

 

Come, one, come all, see the faithful and believers

Sing songs to their gods, to the air and the skies

Oh no, not for me, not my heart or my eyes

I don’t and I can’t and I won’t believe

There is no god and there never will be

 

 

Edited by Mikiesboy
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8 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

i have started ... and written something ... i used bolding but i'm not sure about the brackets.. it sounds right to my ears though..

 

I'll post what i have done here ... the poem i wrote.. was just in my head after reading Waddington's poem aloud several times:

 

‘Of old,’ spake the priest; spake the parson and preacher –

‘After death, O my Friends, after death is Eternity.’

‘Not so,’ cries my Spirit, ‘not so, O wise teacher!

It was, and it is, and it ever shall be

Now, now is Eternity! Is it for thee?’

 

Come, one, come all, see the faithful and believers

Sing songs to their gods, to the air and the skies

Oh no, not for me, not my heart or my eyes

I don’t and I can’t and I won’t believe

There is no god and there never will be

 

 

As we chatted about it offline, the poem you wrote is inspired by contact with Waddington's, but it's not meant to be a match to the metre of the original.

With your metrical analysis of Waddington's poem, I see only a couple of sticking points. With "ever" and the second time "eternity" appears, I'd say you need to listen to yourself reciting the poem again -- in a relaxed, casual way :) -- and determine if you think the natural accent falls on the first or second beat; if it's EV-er, or ev-VER. Both can be correct, and indeed, there is no right or wrong answer.

But once you have tackled these two sticking points, then you will have a roadmap to writing your own poem for the challenge. 

This is good work, and please don't be discouraged. This is mental exercise, and it's "building stronger bones!" (hehe, how's that for mixed metaphors)     

 

 

Edited by AC Benus
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4 minutes ago, AC Benus said:

But once you have tackled these two sticking points, then you will have a roadmap to writing your own poem for the challenge. 

This is good work, and please don't be discouraged. This is mental exercise, and it's "building stronger bones!" (hehe, how's that for mixed metaphors)   

Okay.. here is mine :

 

‘Of old,’ spake the priest; spake the parson and preacher –

‘After death, O my Friends, after death is Eternity.’

‘Not so,’ cries my Spirit, ‘not so, O wise teacher!

It was, and it is, and it ever shall be

Now, now is Eternity! Is it for thee?’

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In a PM, @AC Benus pointed out a flaw in my first cut at this exercise, specifically that monosyllable poetic feet weren't one of the options.  That produced a dilemma for me, which in turn led me to pursue a footnote in the "cretic" link concerning "tetrasyllables".  The search led to another useful link that I would like to share:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foot_(prosody)

I like this page because of the visual representation of (apparently) all of the classical metric poetic feet and all of the patterns therein.

So, remembering that, except for the constraints of the classical meter model, "right" and "wrong" have been replaced by "not wrong", the modified exercise follows:
 

(of OLD)(spake the PRIEST)(spake the PAR-SON)(and PREA-CHER)

(af-ter DEATH)(o my FRIENDS)(af-ter DEATH)(is e-TER)(ni-ty)

(not SO)(cries my SPI-RIT)(not SO)(o wise TEA-CHER)

(it WAS)(and it IS)(and it E-VER)(shall BE)

(now NOW)( is e-TER)(ni-ty IS IT)(for THEE)


...now, on to part B...

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This has taken me too long to respond to, and I apologize. But what fun...

“Wet year!“ cries the cardinal to passersby and rivals; 

“Tom Peabody,“ the sparrow mourns to buttercups and daisies; 

“Cheer up, and go cheerily!” the robin sings from hawthorns;
 
 “Hey sweetie,” croons the chickadee, oblivious of black cats,
 
 “Hush, hush, for the cowbird comes,” the hermit thrush must whisper. 

 

 

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22 hours ago, Backwoods Boy said:

In a PM, @AC Benus pointed out a flaw in my first cut at this exercise, specifically that monosyllable poetic feet weren't one of the options.  That produced a dilemma for me, which in turn led me to pursue a footnote in the "cretic" link concerning "tetrasyllables".  The search led to another useful link that I would like to share:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foot_(prosody)

I like this page because of the visual representation of (apparently) all of the classical metric poetic feet and all of the patterns therein.

So, remembering that, except for the constraints of the classical meter model, "right" and "wrong" have been replaced by "not wrong", the modified exercise follows:
 

(of OLD)(spake the PRIEST)(spake the PAR-SON)(and PREA-CHER)

(af-ter DEATH)(o my FRIENDS)(af-ter DEATH)(is e-TER)(ni-ty)

(not SO)(cries my SPI-RIT)(not SO)(o wise TEA-CHER)

(it WAS)(and it IS)(and it E-VER)(shall BE)

(now NOW)( is e-TER)(ni-ty IS IT)(for THEE)


...now, on to part B...

Thanks, Backwoods Boy. The page you found on Wiki is indeed useful because of the illustrations. I like your metrical breakdown of the Waddington poem and look forward to seeing what you write based on it :)

  

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20 hours ago, Parker Owens said:

This has taken me too long to respond to, and I apologize. But what fun...

“Wet year!“ cries the cardinal to passersby and rivals; 

“Tom Peabody,“ the sparrow mourns to buttercups and daisies; 

“Cheer up, and go cheerily!” the robin sings from hawthorns;
 
 “Hey sweetie,” croons the chickadee, oblivious of black cats,
 
 “Hush, hush, for the cowbird comes,” the hermit thrush must whisper. 

 

 

This is very interesting, Parker. Even without seeing your Waddington breakdown, I can feel the same lyricism in this poem to that. If you don't mind, please do post your metrical breakdown so we can all compare it to this poem. Muah 

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In all these lines, I’m hearing an initial two-syllable iamb, followed by three three-syllable units (anapests, if I remember right) with emphasis at the end. These units are allowed variation, in the same way text set to music will cause the music to have a pair of eighth notes replacing a quarter note. 

(‘Of old,’ )(spake the priest) (spake the par)(son and preacher – )

(‘After death,)(O my Friends,) (after death)(is Eternity.’)

(‘Not so,’)(cries my Spir)(it, ‘not so,)(O wise teacher!) 

(It was,)(and it is,)(and it ev)(er shall be –) 

(Now, now)(is Etern)(ity! Is)(it for thee?’)

 
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