The Whale - 4. Part I, chapter 4

- IV -

The next day was so uneventful and almost dull that I was amazed. At first, I expected something nasty to happen to me again, but then I realized that Russell hadn't come to school today, and I almost fell on my knees, praying to Lord Almighty. It was really bizarre how without Russell around, nobody paid any attention to me. Like without him and his idiotic jokes, people couldn't care less about my very existence. I was enormously happy with that, and only hoped that maybe Russell had something really bad and contagious that would keep him out of school for months. I knew that it wasn't going to happen, of course, so I decided to just enjoy this sudden gift of a dull day.

By the end of all my classes, I was so hungry that I was lightheaded. I almost said, screw this, let's get a hamburger! But then something stirred inside me and I gritted my teeth. If the only way to shut Russell up once and for all was for me to lose weight, I will do it! I'll lose as many pounds as I have to just so he leaves me alone!

When I got home, I was really grateful to my mother who took all fat-filled food out of the fridge last night. I ate almost ten apples, and finally, felt okay. I'll have a yogurt and some carrots before I go to sleep, I thought miserably. I was wondering if hatred was all I needed to seriously start losing weight.

Next morning I kept my fingers crossed when I walked into the school building. "Please don't be here," I thought. "Please, don't be here... Please don't..." And there he was. I sighed. Oh well, at least I had one day off. I walked by him, wishing for the hallway to be ten times wider. I expected snorting noises from him, but of course, he would never repeat himself. He didn't even react to me. By now, I knew that he was just pretending not to notice me, just so I would feel all safe and comfortable when he finally said or did something again. I gritted my teeth and prepared myself for one of his nasty remarks. When he didn't say anything, I almost stopped frozen in the middle of the hallway. Did he have to go to the dentist today and his mouth is numb or something? I shrugged and felt somewhat relieved, when I safely got to my desk and sat down. I tried figuring out if I lost any weight yet, but I knew it was ridiculously early to tell. Gaining weight was extremely easy. Losing it, seemed to be almost impossible. I was wondering if I should start working out when the door opened and Connor marched in.

I looked at her and started to think how old she was. Yesterday I thought she was twenty-eight or even thirty. This morning, she didn't look older than twenty-one. I knew that there was no way in hell someone would hire her if she was only twenty-one. She had to be at least twenty-four or older. Finally, I shrugged. It doesn't matter, I thought. She probably just graduated from college.

"Morning, students," she almost sang, and I was surprised when almost everyone smiled at her.

The only person who didn't smile was Luke, of course. He just stared at her, and then there was that malicious glint in his eyes again. I shuddered. Great. He didn't do anything to me this morning, because he was plotting his revenge on Connor. I was wondering what the hell he had done, when she threw her bag on the desk and almost everyone gasped. Oh, Jesus. I couldn't believe my eyes. There were two condoms filled with something white -- probably milk -- attached to her bag. I stared at Luke. He looked calm and almost indifferent, but his eyes were twinkling like mad. I stopped comparing myself to Connor yesterday, when she acted so incredibly cool after Luke's stupid jokes. Right now, however, I was almost positive that she would react wildly after she saw the condoms. Connor turned around with confused look on her face when everyone started laughing.

"What?" she asked with a slight frown, and her eyes immediately darted towards Luke.

He smiled gently.

"Had a fun night, huh?" he said and looked at her bag.

Connor slowly put down her chalk and pulled the bag towards her. She stared at the condoms for several seconds, and then hemmed softly.

"Oh, drat," she sighed. "Luke, those are not mine. I only use the extra-large ones... And those look like they belong to you..." and she returned the same gentle smile.

He looked at her like she had suddenly sprouted a third arm. I dropped my head into my elbow. If he hears my hysterical laughter, I am as good as dead. I am officially in love, I thought. I will worship this woman for as long as I shall live. I didn't even care that I wasn't gay and Connor wasn't either, I was sure of that. My love for her wasn't physical. It was pure admiration. The class was so silent that I could hear the soft humming of the lights on the ceiling. And then there was another explosion of laughter. "Connor – two," I thought. "Russell -- zero..."

"Okay," she sighed. "Now that we had our fun for the day, let's see if we can do something productive as well."

She looked across the classroom, and I was positive that she would call Luke to the board again. Apparently, he thought the same because he almost got up.

"Amy!" she said suddenly, and I blinked. "Come on up here!"

Russell's shoulders relaxed, and he didn't look at me as I expected him to. He looked at Connor, and suddenly, there was the same thoughtful expression on his face as the one he had yesterday after she asked him if he needed to use the bathroom. I briefly wondered what he was contemplating this time, but then just shrugged it off. It was obvious to everyone that the war has begun. My bets were on Connor.

Connor handed me the chalk and nodded towards the blackboard.

"Solve this, will you?" she said and sat on the top of her desk, slightly swaying her foot.

I looked at the board and almost grinned. This was easy. I started to write, and was done with the whole thing in less than ten minutes. I looked at Connor. She slightly squinted her eyes.

"Uh huh," she said softly. "I thought so... It's so easy to trick people sometimes," she grinned at me, and I looked at the board, totally confused.

What the hell is she talking about? I carefully checked my calculations. Everything seemed to be correct.

"I don't see it, Miss Connor," I said finally, and wasn't surprised to hear Russell's snort.

"By the way," Connor looked at the class. "Call me Faith, okay? When someone says, 'Miss Connor,' I don't even realize they are talking to me."

Faith? Hmmm, okay.

"Luke?" she looked at him because he kept snorting. "Do you see what I see?"

"I see what you see," he snorted again.

"Fix it then," she seemed to be quite entertained.

He shrugged and got up. He took the chalk away from me and shoved me aside with a loud grunt. I winced. Here we go. Gotta poke fun at the fat girl, can't just let her be. I took a step back and glared at him. He didn't even glance at me. He erased something from the board with his hand and wrote something else. Finally, he stepped aside and looked at Connor, his head tinted slightly to the left, his expression as smug as ever. She gave him a very tiny smile.

"Read those chapters, did you?" she asked, and I couldn't believe it when he grinned at her.

I looked at the board, and suddenly, felt like a total idiot. I saw Connor's trap bright and clear right now. Apparently, I wasn't the only one, because I heard some loud grunts and growls in the class. It made me feel somewhat better.

"Don't feel bad, Amy!" Connor laughed. "I was actually hoping you'd fall for that one. Sorry about that."

"Yeah..." I muttered.

She laughed again.

"Go ahead and sit down," she told me. "Luke! You do the next one..."

I sat down, trying to figure out why I felt irritated all of a sudden. It's not like the entire class was marveling at what a moron I was by falling for Connor's lure. At least eighty percent of everyone in the room did exactly the same. So why did I feel this way? I looked around. Nobody as much as glanced at me. Everyone's eyes were linked to Connor and Russell. He was swaying slightly on the balls of his feet, hands shoved in his pockets, waiting for Connor to finish writing another equation, and I blinked rapidly when I realized that his indifference to me was the thing that irritated me. What the hell?! I hated him so much that I would jump with joy if he were hit by a bus, and yet, here I was, sitting at my desk, feeling miserable that he was grinning at Connor. I shook my head. The diet was making me lose my mind, I thought. That was the only explanation.

I decided to walk home that day, figuring that I would need all exercise I could possibly get. I walked across the parking lot and wasn't surprised when Russell bumped into me.

"Oh, hey," he said absent-mindedly, cigarette clenched between his teeth. "Sorry..." and he walked away.

Huh? I felt dizzy. What just happened? I reached behind, making sure that he didn't tape a paper to my back that said, "Feed Me" or something like that. There was nothing there. I looked at him, feeling completely dumbfounded. Seriously, what just happened? He bumped into me and actually apologized?! I started walking again and froze in my tracks when I saw Connor kicking somebody's car in frustration. Okay, am I having a nightmare? Or did I pass out from hunger? I walked closer to her.

"What are you doing?" I asked carefully and she looked at me.

"Ugh!" she said and kicked the car again. "My battery died! I can't believe I left my lights on!"

Oh, so it was her car. Okay, then. She wasn't crazy and neither was I.

"You don't happen to have jumper cables on you, do you?" she asked me with hope, and I sadly shook my head.

"I don't even have a car," I said and she sighed. "Sorry!"

"It's all right..." she rummaged through her pockets and sighed again, this time with annoyance. "Damn..." she said softly.

"Hey," it was Russell, of course.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, expecting something nasty to come out of his mouth. I stared at him in disbelief when he said, "Car issues, huh?" He wasn't even looking at me. He was looking at Connor.

"Wow," she sounded so sincere that I blinked. "Aren't you the bright one? What gave?"

He hemmed.

"Oh, I don't know... I guess the whole kicking thing kinda tipped me off..."

"Ha-ha," she said seriously. "Yeah, my battery died."

"Well, Faith..." he said smugly, stretching the name so much that it sounded comical. "I just happen to have jumper cables."

She narrowed her eyes.

"Uh huh," she said. "Why do I get a feeling that you are going to say, 'I'll jump your car if you...' What do you want?"

He shrugged.

"Nothing. I'll jump you for free," and he laughed when she rolled her eyes.

"Right," she sighed. "Well, okay... Please jump my car," she looked at him pointedly, and he laughed again. "And I promise I won't pick on you for the rest of the week."

He shrugged again.

"Sounds fair to me. Be right back."

I couldn't figure this out. I felt more stupid now than I did when I fell for her trap earlier. It sounded like both of them were flirting, but that was impossible. She is a freaking teacher!! And he is what, seventeen?

"How old are you?" I asked suddenly and blinked at my own rudeness.

Connor smiled at that.

"Twenty-two," she said and I winced.

Somehow, I was hoping she was older. At least, thirty. I don't even know why.

"I graduated earlier than everyone else," she explained when she saw my face. "And I got lucky when I got this job... Mr. Lindberg, your old math teacher..."

"It's my first semester here," I said numbly.

"Oh, okay... Well, Lindberg was the teacher before me. He retired."

"Uh huh," I said carefully.

"He used to be one of my old professors," she said lightly. "So he helped me get this job. I love that man!" she grinned, and I almost cried when it made her look even younger.

What is wrong with me? Oh, God, I need some real food! That's what causing it, I am sure! If I only have one cheeseburger, my brain will function a lot better, I was positive of that. One cheeseburger is not going to hurt me, right? "Wrong!!" the voice in my head yelled and I winced. "No cheeseburgers, you hear me?! No more junk food, Amy! Why do you think he was flirting with her?! Because she is not fat, that's why!!" I almost growled at that when Luke's car pulled next to Connor's. He turned it off and got out.

"Pop the hood," he said with the same smug expression that made me want to smack him real hard.

"You smoke, right?" she asked suddenly, and his eyes slightly darkened.

"Yeah," he said carefully.

He looked like he was expecting a lecture on why he should quit, and his jaw literally dropped when she muttered almost guiltily:

"Can I bum one from you for later? I ran out, and this whole battery thing makes me really mad... I won't pick on you 'till next Thursday, how's that?"

He stared at her, and finally, there was that grin of his again that made me feel like crying.

"You can start picking on me on Monday," he said. "Smokes don't count."

"All right," she laughed and took a cigarette from him. "I am not going to smoke it on school grounds... Don't want to be yelled at on my second day," she added with a crooked smile, and I almost lost it when he smiled at her.

"I gotta go," I muttered.

"See you, Amy!" Connor called, and Russell didn't say anything, as if he didn't even notice that I was there.