More Nocturnal Emissions - 4. An Entanglement of Hearts

January slowly gives way to February, and although the temperatures remain frigid, heated hopes leap ahead to the spring that is to come, and hearts yearn toward the approaching holiday—Valentine's Day, no less, as well as the annual Hogwarts Valentine's Ball. It seems as though the students can talk of nothing else amongst themselves. The temperatures within Gryffindor House, though, seem to remain at a constant icy level, no matter the weather outside. And agitation seems to be the order of the day.

Tonight is no exception. James and Sirius are barely speaking. Sirius is still pissed about the Hestia incident (he does have a tendency to hold a grudge), while James has been hearing nothing for weeks except the latest gossip concerning Sirius Black and Lily Evans, and believes every word of it, without even stopping to consider the incontrovertible evidence his eyes should offer him if he’d bother to look. Hestia, under the guise of being happy for her dear friend, presses Lily for details of her relationship with Sirius. Questions that the redhead refuses to answer—not because there is a relationship, because of course there isn't, but on general principle, because she refuses to be manipulated.

Remus has heard the rumors, of course, but doesn't really believe them, as he isn't about to make the same mistake twice with Sirius, not to mention he simply knows better. And Sirius remains oblivious to the rumors because he conveniently ignores the world around him when he chooses to. Besides which, his sole concentration is upon Remus Lupin. And being upset with James.

Because James has taken it upon himself to sit beside Remus on the couch this night, Sirius is relegated to sitting across the room, on another sofa, a text book open upon his lap, even as he watches Remus' every movement from beneath long black lashes. And Remus does the same, even as he painstakingly attempts to memorize the potions text he’s studying. And Peter, who has just entered the room, remains oblivious to it all, simply happy to see everyone together, as he takes a seat on the floor, playing the part of faithful retainer.

Enter the red lily herself now—Lily Evans. She’s been to the library to acquire certain volumes which will be invaluable to her in her studies, both her current classes and the OWL's that all the fifth years will take at the end of this school year. She finds the looks she’s been receiving lately from the student body at large both amusing and annoying. Personally, she thinks there’s far too much gossip flying about the school, most of it quite unfounded. Where in the world did anyone ever get the idea she’s dating Sirius Black? She can't fathom. It’s so very ridiculous. Exceptionally ridiculous. She'd no more date Sirius than she would Remus. Or Peter. Or... dare she even think it? James Potter? No, not even to herself, for that would indeed be a lie. But she hates to admit it, even privately, because she thinks James Potter to be the biggest prat ever. Arrogant. Handsome. Full of himself. Handsome. Troublemaker. Handsome.

If she were to be forced to date one of the four scoundrels of Gryffindor House (and Peter is actually only included on that list by close association with the others, for on his own she knows he’d never dare to do the things the others do, particularly James and Sirius), common sense recommends Remus Lupin, for he’s definitely the most mannered among them. He’s invariably polite, intelligent, well-behaved, courteous—so why can't her heart thump with delight whenever she hears him speak, why does she have to go gaga over a boy with messy hair and a penchant for trouble? Life is simply , she decides, as she sweeps into the Common room, casting her eyes about her.

Latest rumor has it that she and Sirius are going to the Valentine's Ball together. What a laugh. Sirius has never once asked her out, or acted as if he’s interested in asking her out. At one time, she considered Black to be a bit of a Lothario, the way he seemed to kiss every girl in sight. But his behavior has improved recently, she has to admit. Maybe since Christmas, she thinks to herself, although why that should be she has no idea. Maybe he's found the one girl? Maybe he's dating that one girl in secret? Whatever. As long as it isn't her. She catches James' eye—he’s positively glowering at Sirius. What in the world? Surely he doesn't believe the rumors involving his own best friend? But intuition guides her, as she puts two and two together, for his next glance is at her then rapidly down toward his lap and whatever book he holds there. Ah ha, Mr. Potter, jealousy rears its ugly head, does it? Apparently these rumors have your knickers in a twist, and you actually believe them? Fie, James, fie, for your gullibility! And then she darts a look at Sirius, expecting to see the same bleak look upon his face. But, to her surprise, Mr. Black's attention is focused elsewhere. In fact, if she follows the line of trajectory of his vision, she finds...

Well, well, well. What she finds causes Lily to smile. If the rumormongers only knew how very wrong they are. Is she shocked to discover that well-known ladies' man and heart-hrob Sirius Black has eyes for Remus Lupin? No, Lily is more broadminded than that, less judgmental than most. Hmmm, perhaps, though, it's time to have some fun with this, she thinks to herself. She’s suddenly accosted by the voice of one Hestia Jones, who waves to her as if they were the bestest of friends ever, beckoning to Lily to join her. As if, Lily thinks, deciding instead to confer the favour of her company upon...

Sirius Black. She plops herself upon the sofa beside him, setting her books about her, as she gives him a warm smile. "Hello, Siri," she greets him, "Studying, are we? What are you studying for? Maybe we can study together?"

Heads swivel in unison throughout the Gryffindor Common Room as it appears the current stories that are being circulated through the school are being confirmed at this very moment by none other than Lily Evans herself. James Potter is livid, his brows drawing together, while he stares dagger at his best mate and his wouldbe girlfriend. Remus Lupin is rather astonished himself—as much at the use of his nickname for Sirius as for her proximity to his boyfriend. He begins to miserably wonder if perhaps it’s his fault, that because they haven’t consummated their relationship yet, that he’s lost Sirius. Peter is simply confused. And Hestia is seeing green, wondering how long a sentence they would give her in Azkaban for murdering a fellow student.

Sirius is quite flabbergasted at Lily's sudden appearance at his side, as they’ve never been what you would consider friends. The redhead has generally let it be known she thinks he is immature, wild, and a blot on the Gryffindor name. Yet here she is, cozying up to him as if there were no one in the world she'd rather speak to? Very confusing, indeed. What did she ask? Studying? Oh, he has no idea what book he’s even holding, and glances hastily down toward his lap. To his chagrin, he discovers that he’s been holding the textbook quite upside down and turns it quickly about, but she appears not to notice. "Charms," he replies, "I'm studying charms..."

"I enjoy Charms," she confides, "It's one of my favorite subjects." She pointedly does not glance toward Mr. Potter, but she does take note of Remus, who sits beside him. And he seems to be a bit agitated, confirming her suspicions that the attraction is far from one-sided. Let's raise the stakes, she thinks to herself. "Sirius, do you have a date for the Valentine's Ball already?"

A collective gasp from the room at large. Or so it seems. But before Sirius can open his mouth, or gather his thoughts, he finds Remus standing before him, tugging at his sleeve. "Sirius, can I talk to you for a sec? It's rather important. Sorry, Lily, didn't mean to interrupt...." He apologizes to the girl, but his eyes are riveted on the dark-haired boy.

"N-now, Rem? S-sure..." Sirius stammers, while Lily hides an indulgent smile.

"There's something I need to show you—in the dorm..." The last three words spoken with heavy intent.

Sirius leaps up from his seat, dropping his book in the process, and as he stoops to retrieve it, Remus does also, and their heads collide painfully. Remus rubs his head ruefully, as he proceeds to pick up the charms book, returning it to its rightful owner, who is apologizing profusely, and the two boys then disappear up the stairs, leaving Lily free to ignore James Potter and his smoldering eyes—not an easy feat

Once they’re alone in the confines of the fifth year dorm, and once Remus has made sure the door is locked and a silencing charm put into place, they fall together, their lips hungrily seeking one another, and for a few moments, nothing can be heard other than the sounds of love. When at last they come up for air, Remus wastes no time in putting forth the question that burns a hole in his brain. "Sirius, do you have a date for the Valentine's Ball?"

"Don't be silly," Sirius remonstrates with him, "who would I be going with but you, you silly git? But you've not asked me, now have you?"

"Asked you?" Remus echoes his words, "how can I ask you? You're a... guy..."

"Thanks for telling me," Sirius says wryly, "I had no idea."

"You know what I mean." Remus frowns, annoyed at having his words taken in that way. "We're both guys. We can't go together to the Valentine's Dance, or any other dance. It... isn't... done...." His normally pale cheeks have taken on a distinctively pink hue.

Sirius flushes, as if struck. "I'm good enough to kiss, but not to be seen with?" He disentangles himself from the other boy's grip, and steps back, his eyes glittering dangerously. "So you'd rather I went with a girl to the most romantic dance of the year just to... save your... precious reputation?" At this moment, Sirius is being rather less than rational, for he understands only too well the dangers of coming out of that closet, especially for him. His family would never tolerate such behavior on the part of the Black heir.

"Did I say that?" Remus flinches. "No, of course not. I just don't want you to take any girl. Unless you want to, of course. Do you want to?"

Their eyes lock, both glowing with hurt. "Do you want me to?" Sirius counters in a non-answer.

"Did I say that?" Remus repeats. A Hogwarts Mexican stand-off in the making.

What might have happened is hard to say, for there is a sudden banging on the door, and a voice which whines, "Guys, c'mon, lemme in, I wanna go to bed," which they recognize to be Peter's.

Without replying, Sirius unlocks the door. He throws it open, almost catapulting Peter into the room. "Why'd you lock the door?" he grumbles, as he staggers sleepily toward his bed.

"Wasn't locked, Pete, must have stuck," Sirius lies, his eyes intent upon his boyfriend. "What do you want me to do?"

"Whatever makes you happy," Remus replies in a ragged voice.

"But you won't let me," Sirius counters, "unless... are you asking...?"

"Sirius, I can't," Remus fairly moans, his eyes begging for understanding.

Without a word, Sirius spins about on his heel, heading toward the door, pausing as he hears a plaintive cry behind him.

"Sirius... be reasonable...."

But Sirius is not in the mood to be reasonable, and his eyes sting as he rushes down the steps, his intent being to go outside of the castle, take a walk, or a run, and clear his head, be alone with his thoughts. But he’s caught halfway down by a figure who seems to be where she shouldn’t be. That’s something the boys cannot reciprocate, being charmed out of the girls' dorms, but the girls have freedom to enter the boys'—go figure.

He glances up at annoyance to find himself held by one Hestia Jones.

"SiriuswillyougowithmetotheValentine'sBall?" she asks in one swift rush of words, and it takes him a moment to decipher what language she’s even speaking. His aching heart and bruised ego respond before his brain has a chance to think through what he’s about to say.

"Sure, why not," he mutters, as he breaks free from the grip she has on him, continuing on his way, Hestia close on his heels now, her face split wide with a happy grin. Sirius' main thought is simply to get the hell away from here, now, but he finds his way blocked by a very irate James Potter.

"Sirius," James begins, his finger darting out and poking Sirius in the chest. Sirius blinks in surprise, and instinctively shoves back.

"Don't do that," he warns him. Before James can reply, Hestia is already broadcasting the news.

"Sirius and I are going to the Ball together!" she squeals, just as Remus enters the room. The lycanthrope turns very pale, his eyes darting to Sirius for confirmation, but the animagus refuses to look. Lily leaps up from her sofa, makes her way toward Remus (pushing past James to do so), and takes the stricken boy's hand in hers, asks softly, "Remus, will you go with me to the dance?"

Sirius' eyes widen at her question, and James now turns his attention to the other tableau unfolding before him, in horror.

"Yes, I will," Remus blurts out, his own pain coming to the fore.

Sirius wrenches himself away from Hestia at last—he’s heard more than enough—and tears out of the Common Room without a backward glance. If he had looked, however, he would have seen the following:

Hestia triumphant, James infuriated, Lily bemused, and Remus brokenhearted.

Ah, what a tangled web we weave indeed....