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Girl Brain


Razor

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I have found out that I have a decidedly female brain. I have also found out that simply because a man is gay does not mean that his brain will function any differently than a completely straight guy's does. I have further learned that boy-brained people are f**king weird.

 

I'm doing this paper on gender and communication for anthropology, and it's very interesting. It talks about the differences between the ways men and women in general will communicate in private and public settings. Women tend to talk more in private, but remain silent or brief in public. Men tend to clam up in private conversations, but talk much more in public.

 

Women also use communication more often for intimacy; they use language to ascertain emotional states of their peers, forge relationships, reassure and give support, etc. Men tend to use communication for sharing information.

 

The classic example is the woman who asks her husband what he's thinking about who then replies honestly "I don't know". The woman becomes frustrated because she feels that the man is pulling away from her or avoiding her question, but the man becomes frustrated because he doesn't know how to answer the question in the way the woman expects him to.

 

I have a girl brain. When I communicate, it is clearly meant to be for emotional purposes. I share stories, thoughts, theories, and everything else that pops into my head. The other day, I asked my ex-possible-romantic-interest what he was thinking about. I had just spilled my guts about something, and I wanted to know what his response was so that I could be assured that he didn't think I was going about it wrong or overreacting. His response? "I don't know."

 

I think that most people will probably find themselves in one of these usual patterns, even if they are more of a hybridized version. Of course, I have no problem speaking in public. I consider myself to be a very eloquent speaker, and I can usually convince people that I am in authority and expertly versed in whatever issue I am discussing. However, I would much rather have a conversation about feelings, thoughts, and ideas than speak purely to inform.

 

I find the tendency to fall into one of these roles somewhat interesting. While it is true that not all men or women will follow the norm (case in point, me), they DO statistically tend to follow the pattern.

 

Don't you think that's kind of nifty?

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Another point of niftyness:

 

Everyone knows that females reach emotional maturity faster than males (on average). Part of the reason for this is that at early stages of development, boys tend to be allowed to run riot in the backyard, or play video games, while girls are expected to stay close to the grownups. The average girl is conditioned to be dainty, nice, and "mature" literally at her mother's knee, while boys tend to spend less time with adults, and so don't pick up on social nuances until much later.

 

Taking a psychodynamic look at this theory, we can assume then that these behaviors are reinforced during the Latency ("boys have cooties") stage of development, when children more or less stick to groups defined by gender, until two completely different cultures are allowed to flourish simultaneously side-by-side.

 

Also on Male/Female thinking, a friend of mine is convinced that if females had been in charge throughout the development of civilization, weapons as we know them would not have been developed, since there would not be such a phallic emphasis. She was unswayed by my pointing out that swords and other blades are basically wedges stuck on levers, and so would have come about regardless. Fighting styles might be different, to emphasize different muscle groups, but the tools would be similar. She also dismissed as irrelevant that guns are considered phallic objects because they confer power, they aren't supposed to be substitute organs.

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I like playing in the mud with my trucks. :P

 

It's a good thing too because trucks and mud are the only things we have in abundance in the Federal Republic of Dixie.

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I have a very girly brain. lol. But you're right about it being right for most people. All of the gay guys I've met have had guy brians, except for maybe one or two.

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I believe the girl brain/boy brain thing just muddys the water...especially in Mississippi where, as James said, there's lots of mud. :P

 

Expressing emotions has got to be the #1 difference between girls/boys and women/men. If there were an EQ (emotion quotient) like there is an IQ, most women would score 150+. Most men would score around 6. :( It's sad but it's the truth.

 

I believe this difference is largely explained by how boys and girls are raised i.e. based on culture or, if you prefer, the environment. Boys are born with the same "potential" for emotions as girls are. It's just that boys never get to practice the full range of emotions e.g. sadness and fear. They are constantly bombarded by statements like: "Boys don't cry." "Don't be a wuss." "Stop acting like a girl." Then there's the boy culture in middle and high school where any girl-like behaviour or even appearance will get you devoured. On the other hand, boys are expected to be aggressive. In our culture, anger is a far more "acceptable" emotion than fear. How can you express emotion when you don't even know what emotion you're experiencing? When you can't recognize emotions in yourself, how the hell can you recognize them in others?

 

I also believe, on a more biological level, women want a mate who's masculine and successful and who would make good fathers and protectors. It's their natural instinct.

 

Definitely a fascinating topic, though.

 

Conner

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Also on Male/Female thinking, a friend of mine is convinced that if females had been in charge throughout the development of civilization, weapons as we know them would not have been developed, since there would not be such a phallic emphasis. She was unswayed by my pointing out that swords and other blades are basically wedges stuck on levers, and so would have come about regardless. Fighting styles might be different, to emphasize different muscle groups, but the tools would be similar. She also dismissed as irrelevant that guns are considered phallic objects because they confer power, they aren't supposed to be substitute organs.

 

I might could possibly accept that position if she could have given an example of a weapon developed in a matriachal society that had any hope of combatting a ballistic or wedge weapon. Well, other than mind numbing and endless bitching.

 

Ya know, a cylindrical wedge, call it a spear, arrow, (modern) bullet, or missile (of any variety) has the shape it does because of it's intended purpose. The goal is to cleave the target or the air by the concentration of force to a small point. The fact that such things resemble the mamalian penis is simply a similarity of physical function, rather than some deep seated psychological issue.

 

And the thought just popped into my head. You want to get phallic in terms of tools. The knitting or sewing needle is about as phallic as they come.

 

As for our cute little razor having a girl brain .... as long as he doesn't have a girl body, it doesn't much matter. :P:lol:

 

:king: Dr. Mr. Snow "Snoopy" Dog

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I completely agree with you Jamie, and apart from the differences in our writing styles I could practically have written the same thing about myself :P

 

I had a friend with whom I frequently fell into that pattern of asking him what he was thinking or what he thought about something I'd just said, and his response was always along the lines of "I don't know" or else some rhetorical trick he'd attempt to use to please me.

 

Another big thing is the ways males and females attempt to comfort/console someone. After my two best friends moved away I was whining about how much I was going to miss them, and how much it sucked that they'd moved, etc. All he kept doing was saying, "well you can still call them, or get on facebook, or email them..." and I'd say, "Yeah, I know, but it still sucks that they've moved away." "Well, like I said you can do X, Y, Z to stay in contact, that's really all I can suggest."

 

But really I knew all that already! Those ideas had already occurred to me, but they did nothing to change how I felt about the situation, and further I wasn't expecting him to come up with some brilliant solution, I was just looking for a hug and a little sympathy and emotional reassurance.

 

Guys in general tend to be very solution oriented when there's a problem, whereas girls tend to offer the emotional support. Both are nice, and if you have an idea that might help I want to hear it! But after/during that I'd like the cuddling too :P

 

My friend and I eventually parted ways, and while there were some other more concrete issues on the surface, we both agreed that fundamentally we communicated and interacted differently. It's interesting to think that what it came down to fundamentally is something that the majority of couples have had to deal with since the beginning of time.

 

 

I won't even speculate on whether or not I think it's "Nature" or "Nurture", as with all such questions I think the only correct answer is obviously, a combination of both. However, I would personally prefer to regard all such matters as the result of nurture/society. So while I readily admit that such things are generally a mix of both, my bias is always toward assuming it's some form of social conditioning over genetics/biology. Undoubtedly this is because I have a very strong preference toward social/psychological matters, whereas biology/science - while I understand them just fine - bore me and turn generally "turn me off".

 

Anyway thanks for giving us something interesting to consider!

 

:hug:

Have an awesome day and take care :)

-Kevin

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I LOVE YOU KEVVERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

~attacks and snuggles you relentlessly!!!!!!~

 

:D I LOVE IT WHEN SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

 

What is WRONG with those people?! They're like "Well bitching about it doesn't help!", but it DOES! Offering practical solutions is what doesn't help! Anyone with a brain has ALREADY THOUGHT OF THOSE. ~exasperated sigh~ They just don't understand.

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I completely agree with you Jamie, and apart from the differences in our writing styles I could practically have written the same thing about myself :P

 

I had a friend with whom I frequently fell into that pattern of asking him what he was thinking or what he thought about something I'd just said, and his response was always along the lines of "I don't know" or else some rhetorical trick he'd attempt to use to please me.

 

Another big thing is the ways males and females attempt to comfort/console someone. After my two best friends moved away I was whining about how much I was going to miss them, and how much it sucked that they'd moved, etc. All he kept doing was saying, "well you can still call them, or get on facebook, or email them..." and I'd say, "Yeah, I know, but it still sucks that they've moved away." "Well, like I said you can do X, Y, Z to stay in contact, that's really all I can suggest."

 

But really I knew all that already! Those ideas had already occurred to me, but they did nothing to change how I felt about the situation, and further I wasn't expecting him to come up with some brilliant solution, I was just looking for a hug and a little sympathy and emotional reassurance.

 

Guys in general tend to be very solution oriented when there's a problem, whereas girls tend to offer the emotional support. Both are nice, and if you have an idea that might help I want to hear it! But after/during that I'd like the cuddling too :P

 

My friend and I eventually parted ways, and while there were some other more concrete issues on the surface, we both agreed that fundamentally we communicated and interacted differently. It's interesting to think that what it came down to fundamentally is something that the majority of couples have had to deal with since the beginning of time.

I won't even speculate on whether or not I think it's "Nature" or "Nurture", as with all such questions I think the only correct answer is obviously, a combination of both. However, I would personally prefer to regard all such matters as the result of nurture/society. So while I readily admit that such things are generally a mix of both, my bias is always toward assuming it's some form of social conditioning over genetics/biology. Undoubtedly this is because I have a very strong preference toward social/psychological matters, whereas biology/science - while I understand them just fine - bore me and turn generally "turn me off".

 

Anyway thanks for giving us something interesting to consider!

 

:hug:

Have an awesome day and take care :)

-Kevin

 

 

I can agree, but I think I have a mix of both brains, I'd rather see them again, I love talking to a few friends and family members face to face, internet doesn't always work for me, Esp since I want to badly meet some people from ga.

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