Went to the doc today and let him finger my prostate. Oooh! Such a feeling!

"It's a shame you have to go through something so disagreeable," he said.

I almost, almost said, "you can stick a finger up my ass anytime you want," but I didn't. No need in going there. I'm not out to him and don't see any reason why he needs to know. He's my wife's doctor, too, so why put him in the middle of something he doesn't need.

"It's a normal exam," he said.

"Thanks," I said.

Then I went down to the lab and the duty vampire sucked out a sufficient quantity for a PSA test. Four years ago I had 2.0 ng/ml; this time it was 1.9, which I guess is okeydokey.

I mentioned to the lab tech I was thinking about getting a tat and she showed me the bird above her right breast and the sun on her left shoulder. She also said the place I want to go is a good place. I figure a lab tech would know if a tat shop was clean.

So, I stopped on the way home.

"Where are you going?" the wife asked when I parked the car.

"Be right back," I said.

The shop was technically closed, but the owner was in and allowed me to look though the sample book for a gecko. I picked out a lizard. The geckos were too cute. The lab tech said I should have a yin and yang symbol on the gecko's back. The tat artist said he could put one on the lizard, which will be chartreuse in honor of the new story.

There was also a fairy in the book. I'm thinking he'd look very nice on my left arm. Red, maybe, or blue, or, maybe lavender. A lavender fairy isn't too obvious, right?

When I got back to the car the wife said, "You went into that tatoo place."

"Yeah, I did. I'm getting a tatoo."

"You're WHAT?"

"Getting a tatoo."

I didn't say what I'm getting or where it's going. I also didn't say anything about the lavender fairy.

Yeah, maybe I'll do the fairy, first. Then the lizard. I could do a chartreuse fairy and a lavender lizard, with maybe a red omicron on its back; or maybe a red 42 just for fun.

Wow! This was a fun day.