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Brutal DVD Reviews: Zombieland, Pandorium, 9 and Moon


Zombieland - is a movie I was all set to hate. A redneck, a geek and two female grifters turn out to be much deeper and more engaging characters than you would think at first glance. It turns out that the very skills that made these characters only marginally functional in ordinary society made them excel at survival after the zombie apocalypse. This ain't Shakespeare but it's good for a few laughs.

 

A great bros & brews action movie. A-

 

 

Pandorum - Hated it. I'm not sure whether it was the boredom, non-acting or the unintelligible rubbish that rubbed me wrong way. All these factors taken together, I am bitter about the 90 minutes of my consciousness wasted. At my age I keep track. Hard core tin-hat wearing sci-fi junkies might get off on it until something better comes along.

 

D-

 

 

9 is an animated post-apocalyptic tale of animated sock puppets out to save the world from evil machine-brain which had slaughtered humanity in a genocidal war. You have to suspend disbelief considerably to think that nine sock-puppets are going to have any better luck than the whole of humanity.

 

Somehow the sock-puppets prevail which leaves me thinking that humanity deserved what they got if nine sock puppets can succeed where they failed. I'm not sure what the sock puppets are saving the day for. Humanity is gone and they are only nine sock puppets to start with and less when its over. Maybe you'll enjoy this movie on acid. It did nothing for me clean & sober. It was entirely too animated.

 

C-

 

 

Moon M-o-o-n apparently spells boring, clich

7 Comments


Recommended Comments

UsernameMichael

Posted

Haha I've seen none of those but now I might watch zombieland. Thanks :)

Arpeggio

Posted

I sooo want to see Zombieland :D

Rizan

Posted

I'm glad you gave 9 a C-, i rather liked it in a weird-what the f**k is going on kind of way.

PlugInMatty

Posted

When I saw '9', I thought you were reviewing the Nicole Kidman movie.

 

Thank f**king christ you weren't.

thatboyChase

Posted

Moon was amazing, 9 was good and zombieland was funny. you're just old and bitter.

thatboyChase

Posted

and that nicole kidman movie Nine sucks dick

JamesSavik

Posted

I stand by my assessment of Moon. It sucked raw, smelly BALLS. It wasn't even interesting enough for me to finish.

 

It was just another evil corporation cliche. This one was just set in space and wasn't even well done.

 

I am a very harsh critic and you can be sure that if I give it a passing grade, it's worth your time.

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