Day of Silence

[Arpeggio]

(Sorry for the sloppiness; I am doing this over my phone....)

 

Last year I participated in the LGBT event of silence for the first time. I had mixed feeling about it, so I was wanting to hear some opinions before it comes around again.

The Day of Silence is the

Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network's (GLSEN) annual day of action to protest the bullying and harassment of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) students and their supporters. Students and teachers take a day-long vow of silence to symbolically represent the silencing of LGBT students and their supporters.

The Day of Silence has been held each year in April since 1996. The 2009 Day of Silence will be held on April 17.

^[1]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Day_of_silence

Maybe I am the only one who feels this way, but I do not see how being silent helps or prevents harassment and bullying. I understand that it is to "symbolize the silence of LGBT students", but I cannot comprehend how being silent for the ones who were forced to be silent helps. I always learned that not speaking out does not receive any results. I want to participate only because I'm gay, and that is not a very good reason in the first place.

I want to know that I am doing the right thing if I am going to be silent for the day.

 

Perhaps I don't grasp the meaning of this day properly and if I don't, please, educate me; I love to learn.

 

What is your opinion?

 

[MikeL]

Students and teachers take a day-long vow of silence

 

I just wish my high school teachers had been silent for one day.

 

Sorry, I realize I'm no help.

[Emulated]

I can understand where you're coming from but I can also see why it's a Day of Silence, as opposed to a Day of Noise. Perhaps the following quote, (taken from the DoS website) would help clarify:

 

"Please understand my reasons for not speaking today. I am participating in the Day of Silence, a national youth movement bringing attention to the silence faced by lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people and their allies in schools. My deliberate silence echoes that silence, which is caused by name-calling, bullying and harassment. I believe that ending the silence is the first step toward fighting these injustices. Think about the voices you are not hearing today. What are you going to do to end the silence?"

 

So it's a bit, "You shouldn't suffer in silence." But the whole idea behind the silence it is to bring attention to it. But I'm not sure how successful that idea is.

 

I personally think that it's a bad idea. The silence faced by LGBT people shouldn't be demonstrated with more silence. A voice is what's needed. It's a voice which gains attention.

[Benji]

Sounds almost like Gandi, this 'day of silence' likened to his International Day of Non-Violence. I don't know of anyone doing the day of silence thing, but I would be interested in finding out if it had any effect.

[KJames]

(Sorry for the sloppiness; I am doing this over my phone....)

 

Last year I participated in the LGBT event of silence for the first time. I had mixed feeling about it, so I was wanting to hear some opinions before it comes around again.

Maybe I am the only one who feels this way, but I do not see how being silent helps or prevents harassment and bullying. I understand that it is to "symbolize the silence of LGBT students", but I cannot comprehend how being silent for the ones who were forced to be silent helps. I always learned that not speaking out does not receive any results. I want to participate only because I'm gay, and that is not a very good reason in the first place.

I want to know that I am doing the right thing if I am going to be silent for the day.

 

Perhaps I don't grasp the meaning of this day properly and if I don't, please, educate me; I love to learn.

 

What is your opinion?

 

 

 

Lacey, it grew more out of solidarity with them than anything else...those of us who were already out, and done with school did it to show them they were not alone in their struggle to be who they truly are, or who they truly can be.

[JamesSavik]

Lacy-

 

I've never been optimistic about the day of silence as a powerful statement.

 

Our detractors would love for us all to just shut up so a day of silence seems to defeat its own purpose.

 

It does have one thing attractive about it: you get to ignore and/or dismiss anyone you want while you participate.

 

 

JS

[Sir Galahad]

I have to say that before this I had never heard of it. But whilst the symbolism seems to be ok, I agree with James that a day of silence does seem to defeat the purpose. Surely we should be making more noise, not staying mute.

[Arpeggio]

So it's a bit, "You shouldn't suffer in silence." But the whole idea behind the silence it is to bring attention to it.

 

By being quiet? I just don't understand.

 

I'm towards being a pessimist towards the idea. I agree with James, it seems like they would WANT us to shut up. Being bullied shouldn't be silenced, not even for symbolism. right?

[Emulated]

I guess they are just trying to look towards another approach of activism. Their idea must be, "We have the big and colourful gay pride parades, why not try the opposite."

 

I can see what they're trying to do, but honestly, how many people are going to take note of the few people who remain silent for the whole day? Not many.

 

I'm not sure how successful it actually is in practise, but I have to agree with you, I don't think that silence is the best form of supporting gay pride.

 

 

Edit: My previous post was a bit flakey, so I cleaned it up.

[MikeL]

What do you do if you are being silent and a really cute guy speaks to you? Do you ignore your vow of silence and engage him in conversation or do you give him the silent treatment? Just curious.

[KJames]

Just hold your finger over your lips in the universal "Shhh"...if he's gay, he might get it...if he's dense, give him one of the "Day of Silence" notes.

[Emulated]

What do you do if you are being silent and a really cute guy speaks to you?

To hell with the silence!

[rknapp]

Just hold your finger over your lips in the universal "Shhh"...if he's gay, he might get it...if he's dense, give him one of the "Day of Silence" notes.

 

... and your phone number.

[AFriendlyFace]

I've thought about this a lot over the years, and I ultimately don't think it really matters that it's silence. The only thing that matters is that it's something that a lot of GLBT people and their allies are all doing at the same time. It could be everyone wearing a rainbow bracelet on the same day, or everyone walking around with a big X on their cheeks.

 

What matters is that it's something noticeable that other, non-supportive people wouldn't accidentally decide to do (for example everyone wearing a red shirt wouldn't work because it wouldn't be very noticeable and a lot of random, homophobic people might coincidentally do it too). That way it calls attention to the people and can rightly be identified for what it is. It's just a general opportunity to come out as GLBT/GLBT friendly and to do so with the solidarity of a large number of other people in the community.

 

Silence is a good choice because it isn't something highly negative that could get you into trouble. Of course it could still get you into some trouble depending on the circumstances, but it isn't overly hostile or offensive, so it won't draw a lot of negative attention. It also works because there's a way to symbolically relate it to the struggles of GLBT people in general (however tenuous and irrelevant this relation may actually be). I think it's basically just a PR spin and a general justification for what action was chosen. As I said, it could be anything.

 

In general though, it's probably helpful that it's something that's somewhat of a sacrifice and that requires some effort. It does demonstrate a certain level of dedication and resolve to pull it off. It also has the benefit of being something that almost anyone can participate in. It doesn't require money or any special talent.

 

So silence is a decent choice simply because it's something and that something, when done by lots of people simultaneously, is a good way to highlight GLBT issues. It will get people talking about it and asking questions and looking for information. Ironically, silence is a good way to open dialogue in this case.

 

One more thing, you guys should check out the GA Day of Silence Anthology. It was the second ever anthology and the one which kick started the events as regular, quarterly installments.

 

 

 

Have a great day everyone!

Kevin

Edited March 23, 2009 by AFriendlyFace

[wildone]

One more thing, you guys should check out the GA Day of Silence Anthology. It was the second ever anthology and the one which kick started the events as regular, quarterly installments.

 

 

Thanks for posting the link Kevin .

 

When I heard about the upcoming anthology on Day of Silence, I thought oh well, wonder what this is about? Funny thing is that I got a whole new understanding and respect for the event by reading what it meant to different people through their characters and story.

 

I would highly recommend reading this anthology, as for some reason to me it will always be one of the more powerful ones.

 

I also remember attending University where the Gay/Lesbian club put up posters a week before saying such and such day wear jeans to show you support for Gay/Lesbian rights. . How much imagination went into this as the majority of students wore jeans to school every day? It was more of a joke than a event to show support for GLBT communities. At least a Day of Silence is doing something that isn't expected or the message can be ignored once you realize what it means.

[Objectivist]

I participated and organized Day of Silence my junior and senior year...

 

My junior year, was when my friend S. decided she wanted to create a GSA (gay straight alliance) and with the help of another mutual friend they were able to accomplish it, but not until March... which took a while... and I got involved in the group, made friends with the creator of the group (S.) and... helped her organize Day of Silence... It was our first year organizing anything to this degree... and everyone within the club, (which was about 15-30 ppl) tried to get their friends and such to participate in the event.

 

It was a fiasco... we had... very little time to properly organize the event... AND the Principal of the school kept pushing back his decision on whether or not to allow the event to happen. Eventually we got the green light from him (you generally want to work WITH the faculty of your school, and not against, to make everything run smoothly)... and we got as many people's names who wanted to participate in the event... that way... we'd be able to track them down and give them a rainbow ribbon and a few cards to use.... talking about day of silence.

 

The whole point of Day of Silence (IMO) is to put yourself in the shoes of some LGBTQI individual..... who can't speak out against what's happening to them in school... Someone who can't tell their teacher, their counselor, their mom or dad, or police officer, principal that they're being harrassed, shoved up against lockers, kicked in the balls, slapped around, punched, tripped, raped (at times)... because no one will listen.

 

So lets say you're in a class of 25 students... and 15 of those students participate in day of silence. that leaves 10 students to talk among themselves... and sure they'll talk... but things will get awkward after a while... because 15 of their classmates are not talking... and then things will get silent... because 15 students participating in Day of Silence aren't talking for the day, and because the other 10 are in an awkward situation... so what do you hear? Silence.

 

Finally... people are listening.

 

That's ideally what people would hope for... and believe it or not... silence drives people crazy... You can be quiet by yourself... but be quiet in a room of 25... and its very awkward, and it makes you want to speak out, JUST so that it wont be silent.

 

Anyways... thats my opinion on the matter...

 

The second year we did Day of Silence... we made sure to grab everyone's first and last name, that way... our Sponsor could send those names to every teacher, so that the teachers would know who's participating in the event... That way we could keep assholes from taking advantage of this of activism.

 

We had over 200 people participate. Which IMO is quite awesome.

 

Laterz

 

James

[AFriendlyFace]

Fantastic story and perspective, James! I'm really pleased and impressed!

 

 

I hope it becomes a recurring event at your school!

[Arpeggio]

The whole point of Day of Silence (IMO) is to put yourself in the shoes of some LGBTQI individual..... who can't speak out against what's happening to them in school... Someone who can't tell their teacher, their counselor, their mom or dad, or police officer, principal that they're being harrassed, shoved up against lockers, kicked in the balls, slapped around, punched, tripped, raped (at times)... because no one will listen.

 

So lets say you're in a class of 25 students... and 15 of those students participate in day of silence. that leaves 10 students to talk among themselves... and sure they'll talk... but things will get awkward after a while... because 15 of their classmates are not talking... and then things will get silent... because 15 students participating in Day of Silence aren't talking for the day, and because the other 10 are in an awkward situation... so what do you hear? Silence.

 

Finally... people are listening.

 

Wow, I understand that. Thanks for the information, it really helped.