Comicality Story Review 2/2

[Comicality]

"A Life Forever Changed" By Bensonrob

 

http://irc.shackoutb...d=56&Itemid=248

 

One of the very first things that I noticed about "A Life Forever Changed" was the idea that it's not just surrounding a love story, as most stories in this genre are. I think I found that really refreshing. There IS a love interest that takes place in the story a bit later on, but that shares equal time with the frightening and often frustrating struggle of a yung boy coming out to his friends and family. And that does give it a touch of added realism that I'm sure people will appreciate as they dive deeper into the main character's life little by little with each chapter.

 

"A Life Forever Changed" is the story of Joshua, a 12 year old 7th grader in Junior High who is just now coming to terms with his budding sexuality, and is trying to find a way to be himself without judgement or rejection. Not an easy feat, as his mother is religious and was brought up to believe that being gay is wrong. Period. However, without giving anything away, this story gains depth by including a single parent with negative views on homosexuality...also going through a series of personal conflicts of her own. Again, it's a refreshing and appreciated approach.

I am impressed that the story really feels as though it's 'coming from somewhere'. he author, BensonRob, writes Joshua's thoughts with real heart. It truly does present the kind of confusion, and fear, and determination, that we've all felt at one time or another. What should I say? How should I say it? When should I tell her? What will they think of me? The range of emotion is covered from every possible angle. And some of the reactions were unexpected once the confessions start dropping. It feels like a personal experience, and it's easy to relate to, so it draws you into the story even more. Excellent way to go about doing that and bring that familiar feel to every chapter.

 

Now...while I'm usually telling authors to give more detail during certain scenes and expanding on the moment, I'm going to go in the 'opposite' direction with this one. ::Hears people gasping:: Hehehe! In this story, there were a few places where I thought the added detail was a bit too much. It wan't BAD, not by any means. But there were times when the description of Joshua happened more than once in a chapter, or descriptions of parts of the house, the color of the blinds, or the walls...which done every now and then really works to paint a picture, but I feel that it can sometimes distract from the mood. Like, I could see him walking down that hallway, all tense and ready to see if he's actually going to tell his mom that he's gay...and then the story will stop momentarily to describe the wooden floor. So I get anxious and eager to skip it to see what hesays...but I don't want to miss anything. Hehehe, so yes, in those cases, I think less is more. The feel and emotion of a scene is much more potent than the visuals. Once you get your readers wrapped up, KEEP 'em wrapped up.

 

The relationship between oshua and his mom kinda threw me at first. Because I wasn't quite sure which way the mother was going to be portrayed. This is something that seemed to get much smoother and more stable as the chapters progressed, so I guess that's a problem solved. (Practice really does make perfect) But in the beginning, I wasn't sure if the mother was going to be an angry, Bible thumping type of mom, or if she was going out and away from home a lot...becoming a neglectful mother...or if she was going to be one of those really loving and understanding mothers who would do anything for her baby boy. The first twoor three chapters sort of give the impression of one relationship one minute, and then another the next. But like I said, the later chapters have gotten much better at defining what's going on there.

 

Also, I'm having fun learning about Lucas and Dylan (Joshua's 'friends'), which I won't give any spoilers there, but they both play a very important role in what's going on there! And as with the rest of the story, there are some neat and some nasty surprises there.)

 

So yes, definitely check this series out. It has reecently posted it's 9th chapter. It really captures those uneasy feelings of coming to terms with who you are and attempting to feel alright in a world that's constantly trying to tell you that you're 'all wrong'. Keep going, dude! You're doing great!

[TurtleBoy]

Great review! Rob really deserves some recognition toward this story. Not to mention that this is his first go at storytelling.

 

The one thing I have to disagree with you on is the descriptions. I thought they pretty darn close to perfect. There may have been one or two descriptions that seemed slightly redundant, but for the most part I felt as if they were helping to build the anticipation. It's like, when you're nervous about something, your mind looks for things to distract you from the situation, so when something important is coming up in a story, and the character is getting closer and closer to certain doom, those descriptions help make the moment seem more real for me.

 

For example, if I had told a really big, fat fib to a friend, became guilt-stricken, and decide to tell the truth, The entire walk down that hall would feel like an eternity. Or, at least, that's the way I saw them

 

Any-who, I give this story two-thumbs up. Except for the cliffhangers. I could do without those

[Comicality]

I guess I could see that. Interesting point. I'm still two chapters behind too. I left off at a good part! Hehehe! Must read more!

[Alan williams]

I have been following this story and I agree. Hardline parents are a problem but she took the right course of action good for her!