Imagine Magazine Question

[Comicality]

 

Big thanks to all of you who took a few moments to comment on the 'Heartbreak' question last week. I truly appreciate your input. It can be a difficult thing to talk about, but that's the whole point of me asking the question. It's our opportunity to tell our story and hopefully help somebody else through the hard times that WE went through! You know?

Anyway, thanks. I'll hold the answers I got in the archives, and I may bring this one up again so we can get a few more answers in the future. Cool?

(My answer to the 'heartbreak' question has just been added. https://www.voy.com/15900/88492.html)

Anyway, this topic is all about the concept of 'gaydar'! Does it exist? Can you guys tell when another person of the same sex is gay/bi/lesbian just from your interactions with them? Is this a real thing? Sometimes people are rather open with their sexuality, but not always. Is there an instinct or a sixth sense that lets you know who might be a possibility when it comes to asking them out on a date? And if you can tell what OTHER people are looking for...do you think they can tell the same about you?

What are your thoughts on 'gaydar'? And how well does it work for you? Or 'against' you, for that matter? Let us know! We should talk about this! Reply below!

[Solus Magus]

I believe in the existence of gaydar. Not scientifically backed but it hints more on the intuitive ability of people who are well-acquainted with the LGBT+ Lifestyle. Intuitive is part of our humanity and I think that the gaydar is something developed by those who have that tendency. Over time, it grows sharper but that doesn't mean you would be correct all the time. Intuition is normally based on personal hunches and not on facts.

 

Yes, it works for me. Back then, I'm able to sniff out which guy would be willing to do it with me, and which guy wouldn't budge no matter how hard I try. It would be easier to navigate towards them and sniff out those who are in-denial of their sexual tendencies. Having a sharper gaydar would help you press the right buttons. There was no way I would flirt with a guy who would have called me out, especially back in High School. I think you have an idea why it's not always the best to out yourself when you're still dealing things with yourself.

 

But it also works against me because some other homosexual men can sniff me out in public. At worst, they will try to catcall me or flirt with me. Yeah sure, I'm available but that doesn't mean I'd love be to harassed. No one deserves to be harassed in the first place. I think I would still call it as harassment because like a straight female that would be called out by males, they are still harassed even if their tendencies would also love to screw with men. Or vice versa. I think it goes (and it should!) the same for the people in the LGBT+ Community.

 

There were a lot of times I was able to sense other guys even if they don't have flamboyant movements. As for me, I'm good at hiding because my movements are very masculine. I'm sporty and I love to work out. I have a lot of rash movements and people would often overlook the few giveaways. Whenever I would open my sexuality to other people, they would always be shocked. Except for my way of walking, my butt is kinda perky because I inherited it from my mom so it kinda sways a little bit. That one really gives me away every time!!  

[MrM]

I shall quote someone very wise about things like this.

His name is Brandon and he's quite smart about things like this despite the fact he's only 14/15 years old:

 

I looked it up on Google the other night: Gaydar. LOL. I love the name. it's too funny! The ability to tell who's Gay and who isn't. Like Professor Xavier’s telepathy or something. Now, some guys it's, like, ‘THUPER eathy’ to tell that they are Gay. I mean they wear it like a badge of honor. Swishing and mincing around. Wearing pink and rainbow colors obsessively. Doing their hair in that way. You know the way? I can't describe it....it just is....Gay!

 

But that's not Gaydar. That's just observing obvious behavior. Gaydar basically ‘Outs’ someone to you. They either do something or say something Gay or they just have this vibe. it's very subtle. I think I have a little of it but I think if Jimmy's already figured Joe and I out he must have some serious Gaydar abilities. I'm talking Mutant Superpower here!

 

His long looks at me all naked brings back that full body blush again. I guess girls do this all the time to guys and I know straight guys do this shamelessly with girls, but it looks like gay guys do it too.

 

I looked that up on Google (of course). Cruising they call it in Gay lingo. When you are cruising you're looking for a Gay partner or hookup. If you are being cruised then somebody is checking you out.

 

I get the feeling Jimmy was cruising me hard today.

 

A-Ha! You know what? I just remembered! it's the same feeling I got when AJ 'cruised' me at the Mall last month. Totally!

 

Ok, there's no question then. AJ is the most flamboyantly Gay guy I've ever seen. He is one of the ones I was just talking about. Wearing it like a badge.

 

So, ergo (heheheheh - There goes my mathematical Spock logic) if I get the same feeling from Jimmy that I got from AJ then it stands to reason that Jimmy is Gay too. Just not as Pride Parade as AJ is.

 

So THIS is Gaydar? A process of comparing notes with older experiences? How scientific!

 

It still doesn't explain how Jimmy picked up on Joe and I so quick. Like I said, Gaydar power Class 3 Mutant.  

 

I couldn't have said it any better myself!

Edited November 2, 2017 by MrM

[JeffsFort]

I've always joked that my gaydar was either broken or, I got the economy trial gay'ish'dar which is a beta version and buggier than a piece of hard candy sitting next to an ant hill. As I've told many people throughout the years, I am a gay male who is attracted to straight acting males. Flamboyancy has always struck me as a little over the top and doesn't really interest me. I'm not sure why that is but, it does mean that if I am to ever find "the one" I would need a really good gaydar. I've always been able to find straight guys who weren't hung up on the whole "messing around with a friend" thing, which was awesome when I was a teen but always ended out in a heartbreak once it was no longer wanted. (Guy finds a girlfriend, moves away, gets bored with sex play with someone who is just a friend...) As an adult, feeling that out with other adult males can be responded to violently so, that would be where my gaydar should help. Right?

 

No, not at all. When I was a kid, I found this type of attraction in older teens. I found it in an adult only once when I was still really young (10) and he took advantage of my immature knowledge so he could hurt me. Granted, I'm an adult now but, that fear and anxiety rises to the surface with peer-aged males. Hence, how I believe my gaydar got broken in the first place. There have been times when I really thought another guy was cute but, they were "too straight" to even consider so I never even tried. Times when I would either run into that person years later and meet their boyfriend "Oh yeah, by the way. I'm gay." or be talking to another friend and be told, "You knew so-and-so was gay, right?" When that started happening too often, I just gave up on my gaydar and any hope of finding someone who wanted to share my life with me. Sad thing is, there is no warranty against breakage with a gaydar. If it becomes gay'ish it generally causes more heartache than if it was simply nonexistent. 

 

Yes, I've called gaydar tech support already. They asked for my member ID. Apparently, the economy trial beta version isn't supported anymore.