Toast
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Everything posted by Toast
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Thank you Red A, I'm not offended, but Dylan Thomas might be. I am not really that well read, I am just crazy enough to try something I know nothing about.
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Thank you Kavrik, I don't know why I am so very self conscious about these poems. After all I wrote them and posted them. Thanks for a thoughtful comment.
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Thank you Kevin.
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Thank you Kevin for this review of my poem/s.
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Thanks for reading all of these again, they get lonely.
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It is meant to stir emotion. Like a gesture or a touch can. Do you need to understand?
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I like all the sport stuff and the game playing, pick up ball. Mentioning playing, I wonder is Greg a player in more than one way? So far he seems nice. I also wonder why two guys hate each other and yet are liked by everyone else. Foreshadowing, maybe. Also poor Jenny. I ran out of reps so I will have to catch you later for this chapter. Fun story. Except dad seems to be changing for the worse, why is that?
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This is a good switch. The team quarterback is not the asshole. That honor belongs to CJ. Enjoying.
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You know baseball and pink do kind of go together. So is Corey going to fall for the college boy?
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Thanks Kevin, it's funny I forget these poems.
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I think I will read this. You think it will be completed by the time I get to the end?
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I like your older characters and this promises to be interesting.
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I enjoyed your story.
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Happy Birthday NightOwl!
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Josh and Bill are both caught up in their struggle to come to terms and then get blind sided completely with passion and desire. Love it.
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This has a fullness. The story is ripe with climax for both men. It is the moment in their lives that makes or breaks them. I like it very much. I think it is an universal thing and you have captured it.
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James is so bad, I hope Jenny and Adam escape or turn the tables, and I think the plantation workers are going to burn the place down.
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Congratulations Dark! Happy for your success!
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I like turnip greens and biscuits. And your first chapter here. Different and good and appealing.
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Oh gosh, you want me to work at reading? Grammar check and all? Maybe. But if you are serious you should put this at the beginning of the story. The sex was done well, and I think it added to knowing John and Wylie. The father definitely knows what is going on here. This is a charmed time for John, no wonder he picked this memory to dwell on.
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Well, I would feel very comfortable at the ranch, if I was so lucky to get there. John's father had Wylie investigated? That is different, maybe he is hiding more wealth than appearances speak of, that is something the extremely wealthy would/might do. But that is speculation, but I like little mysteries like this. Another mystery is John's mother. Another is just how well John's father understands his son? And John has taken the another big step here. Which adds another mystery, What went wrong.
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I like all these small details of their "courtship". But because I know this is a flashback, I keep wondering why they did not end up with each other. Somewhere there is a Gordy and a wife, are there children somewhere? This story, is more complicated than this chapter implies. This is an escape for John maybe back to happier times and maybe to regrets? Still this is full of charm and "heartwarming joy" (love that phrasing). And I was captured by it and didn't have to be pretend drunk to want it to continue.
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I thought Wylie sleeping against the door was great. He took action. John got lost in his own world of frustration, doubt and self preservation. It took all of Wylie's anger and speculation and hurt to get thru to John, the nucklehead. Good chapter. I am enjoying.
