Renee Stevens

I feel like a storm ready to burst. I feel like the rain tears hitting the earth. I feel like a cyclone with nowhere to go. I feel like a tornado destroying everything in my path. I feel like the wind nipping in coldness. I feel like a floodgate emotions ready to burst. I feel like a wave crashing with force upon the water. I feel like a flame burning everything I touch. This is the way I feel and this is just t

Sounds like a plan! I'll be leaving in about a half hour, but maybe we can set up something up when I get back if that works for you.

Yeah, that's usually my go to, but it's just not working this time. I think, if this sister time with my best friend (she's like a sister to me) doesn't knock something loose, then I might try again to write a story, for myself. Everything I've been holding inside, everything I've been stopping myself from saying, just get all the poison out without the risk of hurting anyone's feelings. It would never be posted, but maybe releasing all the pent up anger, hurt, dissapointment, etc will help me focus on something other than that.

I think I've read the entire series at least a dozen times. Did you know there's a new one out? It's not "Collars and Cuffs" its "Secrets" and is the new London Club series of Jarod and Eli.

I think the reason camping usually works for me is because it relaxes me. There's no internet (unless I go where I have cell service), no demands on my time, other than making sure hubby and I are fed, and I can just "be".

I think part of the problem is, I tend to internalize what I'm feeling and thinking a lot. And having all these thoughts and emotions welling up in me is stopping me from actually writing. I can't do confrontation, never have been able to, so I even tried to write exactly what I wanted to say to people in the hopes that getting it out would help, but once again.... after I'd finished... nothing. (Except for feeling even more depressed and once again on the verge of tears).

I hope so too. I need to figure something out because being unable to write just makes the depression worse. I may have to consider going back on the depression meds, but they've never worked well for me. Not too basic at all and I see what you're saying. In fact, that's always been one of my ways to get past writers block. I grab a pen and paper, turn on some music, and that usually gets me past whatever block I have. I tried that, last camp trip, and ended up just sitting there for a while. I did eventually write, it came out as gibberish (which I was fine with), but it didn't last long and afterwards, nothing.

I have notes upon notes for a Sci-Fi story (I've never written Sci-Fi, so it would be a departure from my normal), which I WAS really excited about (hence the notes and notes), but I just can't seem to get the excitement going for that either. I have a blast camping, and the biggest thing is, food, clothes, and shelter. As far as the shower thing goes, I know some people can't stand the aspect of not being able to shower, but there's a couple ways around it. Once would be camping in a campground with access to showers, but we never camp in a campground because 1) the dogs, and 2) When I go camping I like the solitude. Also, there's always taking a dip in a lake, but generally I just wait until I'm home or if it's been too long, I heat water up on the stove for a sponge bath, lol. My worst thing is my hair, because I have long hair, and after three or four days it just feels horrible. That's when I have my hubby dumping water over my head as I wash my hair, lol.

Yep. I'm so frustrated at this point. I have so many writing projects on my computer at the moment, but I can't seem to make any progress on anything. I don't know if it's simply because the depression has reared its ugly head, if it's stress, or what is causing my issues. All I know is that I "want" to write, I just can't seem to make anything work the way I want it to. I don't think this is writer's block, at least not in the traditional sense of the word. Writer's block to me usually means that I have no ideas, no vision, nothing. I have the vision, just not the focus, the words, or anything that will actually allow me to write what's in my head. Right now I have: Joined by Blood - revision I want to publish Joined by Blood, but there are aspects of the story that need to be cleaned up and tweaked a bit. I know exactly what needs done, how to fix areas I'm not happy with, and generally I have everything in my head, but I just can't seem to get the words out. Challenging Fate - revision There was always more to Challenging Fate than what I allowed myself to write in the original. To be honest, it's possible I could make this into a novel instead of a novella. Just like with Joined by Blood, I know what I need to do, I just can't seem to do it. Reece's Choice - expansion I've always loved my story Reece's Choice and I want to expand it and publish it. I know what scenes need added. I know what needs changed, but again, I just can't focus. Jerry & Chris: The Beginning - NEW I really want to write a new Jerry and Chris tale. It's been a rather long time since I visited the guys and I thought it would be cool to see when they actually met, or at least got together. But I can't seem to even organize my thoughts on it. Unnamed Story - NEW This one would hopefully be for Dreamspinner Press' houseline, Dreamspun Desires. I know the plot, and it's one I'm actually pretty excited about, but I can't seem to get more than a scene here or there and then I falter. And what I do have, I'm not really sure I'm happy with. Forging Trust - On Hold Forging Trust has been on hold for a rather long time, and I'd really like to finish it. What I've already written is already up on GA, but I'm seriously considering unpublishing it and revamping a bit, clean it up, and then repost from the beginning. However I do, I'm tired of it being incomplete. There's more. I probably have at least a dozen stories on my computer in various stages of completion, but I just can't seem to focus on anything. I've been camping a lot already this summer, and usually camping is the one place I can sit and write, regardless of whether I'm struggling to write at home. So far this summer, that hasn't been the case. Even when out camping, with the peace and quiet, and nothing else really going on, I just can't write. Then again, camping hasn't been as relaxing for me this year as it normally is. There has been so much going on, and for some reason I find myself on the verge of tears constantly. I thought, maybe, I'd found something that would help, but it didn't work out either and, in fact, it crashed and burned a fiery death. I'm really hoping the next couple of days will help turn things around. I'm going back out camping, just until Saturday, with my best friend. Just me, her, and her little boy. I'm really hoping that spending some "sister time" together is what I need to help beat the slump into submission. *Fingers crossed*

I just finished re-reading the entire Collars & Cuffs series by KC Wells

Well, it's the start of a new week, and for today's schedule, we're bringing you Puppilull's review of A Healing Heart by lilansui. Featured story days are a great way to highlight one of the many stories that can be found in GA Stories. With so many stories, it's easy for a single story to get lost in the shuffle. If you're reading a story that you would like to do a blog review and bring attention to, PM me (Renee). Now, onto the review. Hopefully you enjoy Puppilull's review enough to go check out A Healing Heart for yourself! A Healing Heart lilansui Reviewer: Puppilull Status: Complete Word Count: 71,209 Dealing with heartbreak and sorrow can be done in many ways, more or less healthy. One strategy is to lock yourself away from the world. Perhaps not literally, but still hiding yourself emotionally from others around, just so you won’t experience anything like that ever again. Talin has chosen to handle the shitty hands dealt by life by doing just that. He focuses all his energy on his club, making sure to keep a professional distance to those around him, no matter how supportive they try to be. In his corner of the world, life plods along in a predictable and safe manner. Or it could be if it weren’t for a certain man, Dimitri. A man with an uncanny ability to shake Talin up in seconds. Also a man surrounded by quite a few mysteries. As many of Lilansui’s stories, this is an action filled novel complete with gangsters and surprising twists. Some of them will have you reading at the speed of light just to know what’s going to happen. It’s one of those rare stories where you feel the outcome isn’t so easy to figure out. The odds seem stacked against our pair and at times all appears to be lost. Then there is the story of the growing relationship between Talin and Dimitri, written in a way that you feel the attraction they have for each other, even though it really isn’t a good idea to get involved. So much is at stake. But who can fight a pull like that? It’s a fast-paced story, with a straightforward language to match. Yet Lilansui always takes the time to add those extra lines to give you atmosphere and a feel to the surroundings. Not too much to make it tedious, but not so little that the story feels barren. The description of a strand of hair, the play of the setting sun over a face is just right. So if you’re in the mood for a sort of noir feel story with romance to boot, this is a story for you! Category: Fiction Genres: Drama, Romance Tags: Mature adult, gay, urban, crime, modern, love Rating: Mature

I hope everyone is having a great week! It's time for this weeks prompts, supplied by our prompt guru, Comicfan. Just a reminder, and for those who haven't worked with the prompts before: prompt responses under 1,000 words must be posted as part of a collection. Hopefully you'll find something in this weeks prompts to spark an idea and get you writing! Prompt 584 – Creative Tag – List of Words Use the following words in a story – lunch box, wooden table, a white horse, menu, and a needle. Prompt 585 – Creative Tag – The Lady You were hired at a new company and every one has been really nice. After your first week, your boss informs you that you have been assigned to the new president of the company to be part of her start up project. When you ask about her or the job you are told she is a lady and you will find out. What is the lady like? BHopper2 - Prompt: 583 – Creative "Matchmaker" Caleb walked into the office and looked around at the bright cheerful décor. He was still fuming from where his Mother had set him up with a Matchmaker. However, he wanted to make her happy, so he decided to humor her. His first visit with the Matchmaker, Linda Styles, was at his condo off of Bayshore Blvd., three weeks ago. They sat on the balcony sipping coffee while looking out over Tampa Bay, and Downtown Tampa. She had him fill out the forms, and answer questions on what he was attracted to, and other personality base ones. “Thank you, and you’ll hear from me soon,” was the last thing he had heard from Linda, as she left. Until last night. “Caleb, it's Linda, I’ve found you a match! Come by my office tomorrow, and you’ll meet him,” she said in her voicemail. Caleb had missed her call while he was out running. Now Caleb was in her office, and after checking in, sat in the lobby as he waited to be called back. “First time here?” a man sitting in the lobby asked him. “It is,” Caleb replied to him, “you’ve been here before?”

Welcome back to another quirky question and answer session with your favorite authors! In AtA #49, we heard from authors Parker Owens, HinderToyBL, and Milos. Today in AtA #50 we hear from authors Mann Ramblings, Parker Owens, Mikiesboy, and W_L. First up today is Signature Author Mann Ramblings. In addition to writing, this Michigan Man is quite the artist; have you seen the new avatar image? or the book cover he did for Cia? It’s been four and a half years since Mann first followed his heart to GA, and we’ve sure benefited from it. While his time with Wayward Ink was not as long as anticipated, I’m sure that Mann’s stories will find another home soon. In the meantime, if you snoop around his GA stories, you’ll find plenty to keep you occupied. He’s got a Premium story now: Innocence & Carnality Part 2 is the sequel to what was originally written in 1k word-spurts for the flash fiction group. The original story (Part 1) is also a Premium story and explores the changes to main character Nathan as he finds out about the arrangements for his marriage and what happens in his life from there. Given Mann’s rather wicked humor, this is a can’t miss. But, as the author says, make sure you read them in order! To Mann Ramblings: Your pseudonym is a nice play on words, how did you come about it? When I was first getting up my nerve to write M/M, I figured I needed a pseudonym because I knew my stories would have erotic elements. (In the beginning, that was the focus.) Granted, I hadn't actually written anything yet, but organizing a plan is how I function. Anywho, I only knew of one mainstream writer who had delved professionally in erotic stories: Anne Rice. I have a number of her earlier novels and I was a fan. One of the names she wrote erotica under was Anne Ramplings. Looking at it, Ramplings became Ramblings since I wasn't overly confident in my writing skills. (I hadn't written anything in years and never finished any stories that weren't for school.) And since I wanted to emphasize the male aspect of my writing, Anne became Mann. It was all a play on words and a nod to a author whose work I respect and appreciate. Yes, you read that correctly; Parker Owens joins us once more! This is a rare double-shot, getting the same author two months in a row, but Parker keeps his name fresh in our minds with his regular poetry submissions and activity in the forums. He recently finished Predator Prey, a story about finding redemption. If you’ve been the bad guy all your life, and then suddenly become the victim, how might that affect you in the future? Prey explores this and more. Another recent addition is Fool Me Once, Parker’s submission to the April Fool’s anthology. Author and the main character Oliver have a lot in common, both being math teachers, but Oliver has a bit of a problem - or, really, more than one problem. It’s like Murphy’s Laws are out to get him: if it can go wrong it does go wrong. Read and find out how Oliver handles the obstacle course falling in front of him. To Parker Owens: How and why did you get the idea of using science subjects for your poetry? I am a math teacher and all around nerd. These are fun subjects to play with both for the ideas, for their metaphors, and for the words on their own. Math and science subjects for poems sometimes come up as a consequence of a student question, or an image from a way of thinking about a complex subject. Besides, who can resist the challenge of writing poetry about the universal gas constant? Foodie and Author Mikiesboy is up next. Despite protesting being called a “food blogger,” Tim continues to keep us apprised of his food explorations. He used to be the guy with all the food pictures and although he’s down to only 4 pictures of food, it’s still enough to make your belly rumble. Mike is amazingly lucky to be the recipient of all that good food…. Even if he does buy pie from the store. Tsk! We’ve had a lot of poetry from Mikiesboy this year so far in 2017, but take a chance on Miss Silver Pretty-Pink-Toes, a delightful short story told like an old-fashioned fairy tale. Complete with love, revenge, magic, and a riddle, Miss Silver will take you on a fun ride reminiscent of childhood, but without all the innocence. To Mikiesboy: How hard is it to write about your personal life and the hard moments you've experienced through life? Wow, good question. It is hard in a way but it is also cathartic. I starting writing poetry after I was thrown out of the house at 15 and was learning to survive on the street. Years later when I survived a severe beating, and was off the streets, I decided to write as a therapist thought it might help me deal with things. I had recurring nightmares for many years. So I decided i couldnt be timid about it, that I had to be honest and brave and face the things that frightened me. But when I write about myself, I have to do it like a reporter. I have to take a step away and write it without a lot of emotion. The facts, baby, only the facts!! So when I write about me or anything, I try to be brave, and try to push myself. Today’s final author has been with us for just over 9 years. Author W_L writes to us from Boston, Massachusetts, USA. Be careful talking politics with this guy, as he’ll definitely tell you what he thinks in that sharp, dry wit he possesses. He, like Parker Owens is an unrepentant math geek. When I see math jokes in the Make us Laugh thread, this is one of the guys I think of. For example: how do you make seven an even number? WL also enjoys food, and if you ask nice, he might share some of his recipes. In the part of his brain not trying to master calculus and not taking pictures of his dinner to share with us and the part not devising more ways to educate us on current events, WL has managed to squeeze out a story or two. The Real Me is an entry for the April Fool’s anthology, a curious mix of comedy and sarcastic commentary of local governments. Herman is a retired superhero who gets to swoop in and save the day one more time. And he still remembers to get his coffee! To W_L: AJ sees you have written a story called 0's and 1's. He wants to know if you can actually do binary math. if not, why not. 01001001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01000001 01001010 That’s it for now! For more info on these authors, go check out their stories, post in their forums, and/or catch them in chat! I’ll see you next time, with repeats from MrM, Timothy M, Headstall, and a last chat in memory of SkinnyDragon. I’m always in the market for new questions! Simply PM me (Dark). Until next time! Dark

Just continue to hold your memories of Guero close to you. Sorry about your kitty, Drew.

@Hunter Thomson How did the socks work out?!

I have cats too and they like to bring in "presents". I always know they've brought something in, or hidden something, when I find ants. *shudders*

I can. I don't want to, but I can, lol. I've actually had stuff like that happen. Can't remember what it was, but I remember it being nasty.

LOL! If not, I wouldn't want to be you when you found it! Luckily for me, it's usually my dog that steals stuff and if he doesn't eat it, he takes it outside.

chillins???????

*sigh* I really really want to stay up longer, but I can't quit yawning, so guess that's it for me this time. Really. night guys!

LOL. I'd be in the same boat if I tried, lol

I want to see too!

LOL.

Only if you want to go have my blood pressure tested

Sully can get away with waking me up when the hubby isn't home, lol. When the hubby is home, he gets in trouble.