This has been a nice story and I will be sorry to see it end...
By the way, I believe there are laws in all 50 states that prohibit disinheriting a (minor) child.
Interesting story with excellent character development. I like where the story is going: you can't help but root for Billy and David. The rotating POV adds interest to the story as a whole.
Now for a little criticism: There are more than a few spelling, grammar and syntax errors. These should not be difficult to clean up.
Interesting story; the beginning is really well done and captures the reader's attention right away. I felt some parts dragged a bit and as a whole the story would be tighter and more effective if edited to be about a third shorter. Specifically, the digressions about Stephen's (missing) mother could be dropped; I found myself skipping those sections.
Overall, I liked this story and thanks for posting.
Although the story is listed as "complete", the end of chapter 23 doesn't seem a logical ending point. I like the story, some interesting themes presented, but there are many technical problems with the writing that need editing.
Well done short story. I liked the dynamic of the two boy's interactions; it felt authentic. As Zane and Andrew slowly peel away their defenses, it makes for a very powerful connection.
This has been such a great story so far. This last chapter has been so hard to read. I have this overwhelming sense of dread that Andy is doomed.
Well, there's many more chapters to go so perhaps I am wrong, I hope so.
I've loved the story so far but this latest development of antisemitism I don't care for. I wonder if there were some other way to advance the storyline.