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innerkid13

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Everything posted by innerkid13

  1. innerkid13

    Part 5

    James Clay Henry and Margret “Maggie” = J and M - an effort to tell the world what Abigail Henry did not want told
  2. It seems that bigotry exists in many forms. Welcome to America…😢
  3. innerkid13

    Chapter 16

    As inept as McCormick is at his job, I cannot fathom why any reader would expect that police force to be anything but a clown car at a circus. As a reader, I am struggling for any other option except that McCormick is now somehow working for or with Tarquin. This town seems to be becoming a major mafia operation with Tarquin being at least a local operator based on the level of corruption and complicity. I am really struggling to give this the benefit of the doubt. (Sorry.) There are too many infuriating characters and situations - maybe it is time to tell Noah to load the Arc and cleanse the rest. AARRGGHH!!!
  4. innerkid13

    Chapter 11

    I agree with Geemeedee: I am triggered. I feel Oliver has become an addict like victim - to TARQUIN! With full knowledge. Is he salvageable? Hmm…. Will it take something above and beyond amazing to redeem this character - DEFINITELY. Do I think it is achievable? Hmm…. Maybe a slightly shorter prison sentence than Tarquin is a good outcome for this character. ugh.
  5. innerkid13

    Chapter 9

    It does not seem plausible that Tarquin could squirrel away money. Convince me otherwise. 🤔
  6. innerkid13

    Chapter 36

    Sometimes sharing how you resist temptation can be the most enlightening and cathartic experience for all involved…even if Kyle deserves the kind of painful death Shaun would inflict. Maybe the dark drug group will eliminate Kyle and Ethan in a public manner as a message to their other local dealers.
  7. I don’t know whether you have some extreme experiences or just the imagination to pul this together. The cattle reference was particularly impactful. Well done, sir; well done.
  8. innerkid13

    Betrayal

    Well written addiction; I almost feel sorry for Lucas, almost-
  9. It seems like Jake is now in danger from Lucas. Will he drain him dry.
  10. innerkid13

    More

    Lucas is insatiable, truly addicted to semen to continue growing. When will he hit bottom and realize his addiction is not sustainable. Great writing as always.
  11. innerkid13

    Chapter 25

    Krista is AWESOME for posting this chapter during Thanksgiving week - Thank you!
  12. innerkid13

    Chapter 24

    I am unable to find the dehydrating from tears emoji
  13. innerkid13

    Chapter 18

    Woo-hoo! Go Davin! Go Joel! Learn how to be happy.
  14. innerkid13

    Chapter 15

    Only if the Darth went grey - there is no inherit evilness - just what is required to force back to balance - well her definition of balance - maybe if Yoda did not choose the Jedi or the Sith but the path between
  15. innerkid13

    Chapter 14

    Soap? It is more like Laverne & Shirley. I always wondered about Lenny and Squiggy. They probably smelled like bleach.
  16. innerkid13

    Claim the Storm

    Your story just supported that hate and anger is superior to supporting each other. I struggle to not reject this.
  17. innerkid13

    Chapter 17

    Minor detail: where are the dogs, with Colt, Gavin, Davin, and Two tractors across the road or on the couch before the boys return?
  18. innerkid13

    Chapter 5

    Minor detail: “Steve turned, pulling off his helmet and shaking out his dark hair. His eyes, electric blue in the low light, were warm and soft. He looked at Kenny, a quiet, questioning look on his face.” Kenny was wearing the helmet. Overall, enjoying this crazy little story.
  19. innerkid13

    Chapter 1

    I thought the purpose of a curtain was to peak and still be willing to believe what you see…or something even better…or…
  20. I begrudgingly admit that you have enthralled me to actually like Josh…and even Zeke (good thing you started being nice to Joey). Your writing and story crafting bring the characters to life and allow for an emotional connection with them - even when they make bad first impressions. Cheers to you for the accomplishment. Awesome!
  21. innerkid13

    Epilogue

    THaNK YOU! Is there a story about Renato, Ariadne, Timmy, and the council? I look forward to learning the answer one day…
  22. Ok, I dislike Zeke less but still not a fan (picking on Joey remains a hard action for me to overlook - just me). Zeke has gained a little hope from me. Separately, October would likely be considered late in the season - a couple of paragraphs in the chapter around the swimming lesson/wet suits indicated “this early in the season” then October a few paragraphs later. Great chapter in a compelling story. Looking forward to your next posting.
  23. I am not yet a Zeke fan. Maybe he will redeem himself somehow and become more relatable and like able, but now he is just annoying and mean-spirited with a dichotomous willingness to share what he has with others - odd and difficult to align with the jealousy. I really hope my opinion changes…
  24. innerkid13

    Chapter 7

    “I Will Survive,” but I “Ain’t Gonna Bump No More.”
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