Thorn Wilde

Morning, DiC! I have managed to be up by eleven. Meeting a friend who's in town in about an hour. Haven't seen her in ages, so looking forward to it. It's a nice and sunny day out, too. Hope you all have a good day! And, lol! So much fun to read people's reactions to Silverwolf! I knew it would be a hit.

Assholes. Like molly, glad you've got the transcripts. Gonna get some sleep now. Night, everyone!

It is so entirely my pleasure.

here i stand naked everything laid bare each word on my tongue my truth here i stand weeping asking to be seen each moment questioning myself here i stand afraid terrified of myself wondering if everything is a lie here i stand ashamed my body on display chest wide open so you can see my heart here i stand visible my voice like thunder shouting out that i am valid i am here

Hah! Knew people would like it.

Hey, all. I spent my evening killing nazis. Getting into bed now, though not gonna sleep just yet. Got some things to do. How are you all doing?

I wanted to write something for trans day of visibility. Couldn’t quite figure out what to write. Maybe cause I can’t quite figure out what I am. I keep going back and forth between this joy at being able to be myself and this fear that this isn’t me at all. That I’m making it up. Hardcore impostor syndrome. I don’t have that story. I wasn’t a tomboy growing up. I was a girly girl who liked playing with dolls and dressing up like a princess. I don’t have body dysmorphia. I didn’t always feel like I wasn’t really a girl. Can’t recall ever even thinking about it growing up, one way or the other. Every time I claim this label, every time I call myself trans, in my head or out loud to somebody else, I’m scared that I don’t really have the right to claim it. That I’m playing pretend and I’ve just managed to convince myself that it’s real. That I’m stealing it away from someone else. I’m scared that it’s just a phase, and if it is, I’m scared that that is harmful and detrimental to everyone else in the trans community. I’m terrified. And writing this, I feel like I’m about to cry. Is it like people said about me when I started calling myself genderqueer? Is it just that I want to be special? Is it some kind of narcissism, or do I just want to be part of things? And what am I really doing, anyway? Wearing a binder and trying to dress like a boy every day while knowing that I could never pass without transitioning medically, which I don’t want to do, or don’t know if I want to do. Am I a boy or do I just wish I were a boy? And is there a difference? I dunno, this turned into a mess. I’m a mess. But even though I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing or what the fuck I am, I needed to write it anyway. If you made it this far, then thanks. I love you. This community, right here, is my rock.

I just found out that there's a new Wolfenstein game coming out this summer, in which you get to play Blazkowicz's teenage daughters. So that made my day, and now I feel like I have to go play one of the previous games. I'm not normally a fan of super violent shooters, but... nazis. *shrug* See you all later! Happy Sunday!

So, I've been loving the new Wolfenstein games, New Order and New Colossus, but the new one that's coming out this summer, Youngblood, looks particularly awesome. This time you play as one (or both?) of Blazkowicz's teenage daughters, gone to Paris to find and hopefully rescue their father, who's vanished. The trailer looks amazing! Contains violence and strong language, so I'm putting it in a spoiler tag just in case. The gameplay of the two that are already out is awesome, and they're almost stupidly good-looking games, graphics-wise. I can't wait for this third one.

I dunno, I liked your word.

Morning, Reader! How are you, aside from the weather?

Cocktease.

It's not as obvious here, but we've got pollening, too. Daily antihistamines for me.

Thank you, Parker. And thank you for lending me some of your light.

Nice and sunny here today. I think we stole all the good weather... I'll see if I can ship some back to you all when it really starts accumulating.

Oof, that sucks! Hope the weather improves, and soon.

Morning all! Slight set-back on Project: Being Human due to the clocks going forward, so I slept until noon, but I won't let that stop me! Tonight I will get to bed at a better hour. Or try to, at least. Hope you all have a great Sunday!

It's our turn to switch to DST now. Clock goes forward in 5 minutes, so I'll be adding another hour to our time difference again. Sigh... Anyway, gonna head to bed, as 2 am will now become 3 am. Goodnight, DiC!

I figured. I saw that too. I use gifs sometimes on Twitter and Facebook, but a forum doesn't feel like the place for them. Maybe cause they're harder to scroll past?

I'll try to contain myself.

Oh, my childhood! I mean, the song sucks, but my god, did we have fun with it when I was in primary school! Interestingly, I heard someone sing this by the metro station just yesterday. Blast from the past. Coincidence? I think not! lol

i know it isn’t true i know the mind plays tricks but i wish i knew of an easy fix i know my brain is flawed that none of this is real but i feel like a fraud why can’t my mind just heal it sings its darkest song it tells me that you hate me that all of me is wrong and ridicule awaits me that every word i say and everything i do will make you walk away not good enough for you you all will leave me here wi

It's raining here, too, but it's good. It'll make the snow melt faster. I personally think a slow start is the best start to a Saturday. Enjoy your day!

Morning, DiC! Happy Saturday! Hope it brings rest and happiness.

You are fucking awesome! Woot! Good job, A! yes, I did say I was going to bed, what of it?