Jaro_423

It's why I prefer to read a book that is complete at my own leisure and not on a serial.

I never put much stock on Christmas, but my wife loved it and made a big thing of it, so while she was alive it was always a great celebration with lots of family. She passed that on to our children as they all do the same. But the last couple of years, now on my own, Christmas has been something I like to avoid. I've been in the rented room both Christmases and in 2017 the landlord did some Christmas cooking and invited me to partake, but I found it awkward and embarrassing not knowing folk and not having made any contribution. I was invited again in 2018 but made excuses and decided to hike up the mountain with a couple of sandwiches and some tea. I would have stayed longer up there had a chill wind not got up and rather curtailed my stay. Anyway, I did avoid people and the Christmas "slush" (Aren't I just such an anti-social pain!). I see this is a self-preservation thing for me, but I'd rather be on my own than having to pretend it's all good and let's have a jolly time. But I'm glad for Eric that he's making friends and that for him Boxing Day promises to be good.

Wow! Good on Eric for persisting and going back to Brian. Brian is such a sweetheart too for helping him. Very heart-warming and encouraging. Always a joy to find that there are some good people out there, like Brian. The little upset over the rant as to who had the right to the computer would have been enough to scare anyone away, but Eric remembered Brian. If he had not gone for a treat, had not chatted to Brian that very morning, then I guess the computer lessons might have been de-railed altogether. Sometimes things do work out for the good.

Wow! @droughtquake (Not sure how to put your name in there). An Olivetti typewriter. I bought a second hand portable Olivetti very cheaply when I was at uni, taught myself to type with my Mom's old instruction manual one vac, and then typed up my notes - I could at least then read them later, whereas my handwriting, especially scribbling notes in lectures, was quite difficult to decipher if I didn't go over them that same day. The typing was a boon, and even today it enables me to use a keyboard efficiently. And an Apple IIe. Yes, I had one of those too. It might have been our first computer. Ah, the memories!

Wow! A hug! That's so very special. Eric is not into it, but I think he will be after a while, just like the kiss. I'm not a touchy-feely person but how I love a good hug. It does so much for the soul. You are so good at understanding your character. I'm so like Eric when it comes to reading - my mood is easily swayed and I spend as much time delighting and exulting and fantasising as I do feeling sad and morbid. It's the reason I get lost in a book very easily and sometimes it's hard to step back into reality. This book is strange though, because it's more reality than fantasy or romance, and I like that just as much. Thank you.

"It had been a very good day." Yes! Lovely. I even got to envy Eric his garden. The anticipation of getting back a little into that was wonderful. And his independence. Wow! That is such a precious thing much desired and much bemoaned when lost. I don't think most folk appreciate how important that is to elderly folk and how often they will resist needed help even because it impinges on their much guarded independence. I've lost some of my independence and now rent a room in someone's house owing to financial restrictions. He happens to be a Mormon and I'm very reluctant to declare that I am gay because of that, though he's been exceedingly kind to me for all his gruffness. He's helped me be a little more independent. I have a bar fridge kindly loaned by a friend of his and an old microwave oven plus a toaster kindly loaned by a fellow resident. I bought a kettle. So now I can do my meals in my room which gives me a measure of independence. I actually feel very spoilt being able to do that. I'm thinking my experiences since moving country are enough to write a book. Maybe I should do that here. Any thoughts on that?

A heart-warming chapter seeing all the care that Andy is taking. I could do with some of that brunch myself. Lol!

Eric's first kiss had me in tears. So beautifully described and so very tender in spite of how momentary it was. I guess Andy had no idea of the effect it had, but it's almost been the key to a change in Eric. He's not grumbling and complaining! How such a simple thing can have such a deep impression. And Andy does care deeply in spite of his serious lapse in forgetting he was supposed to come the day before. And now Hazel has called too. Another touch from another one reaching out. I'm really getting quite lost in this story and loving it. Thank you.

A dramatic and alarming turn to this chapter. Eric on his own is so vulnerable both to illness and to the nonsense of unruly teens/others. I fear for him. Andy let him down badly by forgetting he was supposed to come on Monday. What was a minor to Andy was very major to Eric. But then before Andy was around there was no-one to help anyway, so even a disorganised Andy is better than no-one at all. Just so unfortunate that Eric has taken ill as well, though it's hardly surprising. Poor Eric.

Yeah, I daily give thanks for the internet and at least having the basics to use it. I would be lost without it and choose the internet over TV entirely. In fact, I don't even have a TV so I never watch it unless at someone else's place, which I can't remember when that was. I learnt early on to use a computer as my brother-in-law got involved and insisted we did too, bless him. But I think about the parents here, long gone now of course, but the struggles they had to adapt. Well, my parents never did, but my father-in-law plunged into it, perhaps because his son got involved, and he managed very well. And then we taught mom-in-law to manage a digital phone. I vividly remember giving her a phone for Christmas and then phoning it after she had unwrapped it. The panic on her face was a sight to remember and caused us all to break down in fits of giggles. But she went on to master it well. So I do appreciate the difficulty Eric will have. It'll be mostly his mental attitude that he will need to deal with. I myself vowed to keep up, but have been unable to do so and these days feel such a clutz with the tech as it advances so very fast and has left me way behind in the dust. Now I just cope the best I can and ask for help a lot. I'm quite chuffed to find folk much younger than me also struggle with the tech. I'm loving the contrast here of the young couple and it makes me feel so much like Eric - envious and filled with an intense yearning that may never be fulfilled.

Wow! This chapter really digs deep into Eric's behaviour. It reveals sources of his grumpiness and the reasons for it. I am chagrined to acknowledge that's me at times too - the jealousy which erupts into rudeness and anger that is really unacceptable. I am humbled. The feelings are so real and so raw. Thank you for this. I have this deep desire for friendship and yet I probably judge and push people away all the time. I have to watch myself more carefully that I don't do that and end up being the one that is responsible for my own isolation because I'm afraid perhaps of other's success. Is that what it is? Maybe. I'm wrestling with thoughts here and being very vulnerable so please bear with me. And I have been trying really hard to be kind to everyone and be thankful in everything, but every now and then that anger burst through and I lose it entirely. So this chapter has led me to lots of introspection. I guess that's a good thing.

Thanks for the encouragement to comment. I like to do so, though sometimes I'm at a loss for words - mind goes blank. Lol!

Now Andy is really getting into it. Must have been the great sex. Lol.

Very touching. This is a real education for them both and it's great to see the way Andy is learning to be sensitive and understanding. I suppose for most folk it's hard to understand Eric's totally ignorance where gay things are concerned, but I was there myself until very recently. I feel the last 6 years since coming out have been a whole lifetime of learning rolled into that time, and I'm still learning. So, I really sympathize with Eric and especially with his yearning over not having had a partner, ever. I have had a few but still long for that special man to come into my life, though now I think it is most unlikely. Thanks for this story. It means a lot to me.

Wow! Adam's a keeper for sure, but great that Andy does listen to him, in spite of the pouts. Hahaha. I see some good things happening for Eric here. That's encouraging. And now I know why Andy's training did no good. But Andy is willing to learn, it seems. I like the understated why that you are writing this. It somehow captures that very English reserve.

Heart-rending and so very sad. I'm hoping that something will be done to help Eric out of this. How is it that a young man can be so very insensitive if he is "working" for this organization, even if it is a volunteer post. What sort of training was he given?

I'm interested to see where your story goes. I'm 70 and came out 6 years ago (2012) to my family and my immediate circle of acquaintances who were affected. I also separated from my wife, who was always my best friend. I felt I had to do that in order to finally explore this gay thing and see if it was possible to get free of it, as all attempts so far had proved totally fruitless. My wife had known I was gay from our mid 30s (the first time I had acknowledged it to myself) but we had stayed together and carried on for the sake of our children. We lived in Zimbabwe where one can still be imprisoned for being gay. I left Zimbabwe at the beginning of 2017 and am renting a room in someone's house in Cape Town, South Africa, with the help of my son, bless him. I have no pension and work is all but impossible (I've had a few odd posts) so money is tight and loneliness high. I'm in a similar position to Eric.

Very intriguing story. Love the way you told the parallel stories and brought them together in the cave at the end. Very nicely done and most entertaining.

Wow! What an amazing story and so much condensed into so little. What an insight into that awful cycle of abuse in which both abuser and victim are trapped in an endless and dangerous repetition that seems impossible to escape from. What I especially loved here was the redemptive aspect of your story in that Mark is not all bad in spite of it all. The revelation Chester gains under the tree is beautiful and so wonderfully freeing to enable him to take some first tentative steps towards the light and even to want in that moment to help Mark's mother too. Wow! And, of course, one loves Chester and is so much rooting for him and feeling his great pain and the hopelessness of being trapped and unable to escape by the fact he feels shame. Shame traps him in the cycle. So wonderful that he has now the opportunity to redeem his life through the gift Mark has given him. And Jordy. What a beautiful man! Please send him my way because I need him to help me. 😋 What a great ending! Love your writing. Thank you.

Thanks for a gem of a story. Heart-warming. I did laugh at all the stuff in the grass again and the confusion over "laid", "lay", "lying". No sweat! I enjoyed the story and we can skip the grammar nerd bits.

I love the vibe between these two starred lovers. It's so very precious though somewhat romantic and in the realm of dreams. But we can all dream and many of us do which is why a good romance is so appealing. Thanks for a great chapter as you send them flying down the years.

LMAO! Great compromise! I guess the vernacular counts a lot for what sounds right. I think, myself, that the usage of that verb must change in America because so many Americans prefer "laid in the grass". Probably time the boffins accepted that its usage has changed. A bit like how Americans say "it was so fun" and not "it was so much fun". That seems to be accepted now as correct Americanism but in British English we are horrified. Lol.

I like how Benny and Griff put themselves out to help Gary find a boyfriend. That is so very special and probably a little bit of a gay thing, I think. Straights are more likely to be in competition than helping each other find partners. And they devise a plan that actually is so very beneficial. These are great guys.

Thought provoking discussion of imagination and science and skillfully interwoven with the different approaches of Griff and Benny. I like that. Your work carries a great depth to it. Seriously do you say "laid in the grass" and not "lay in the grass"?

Thanks. Love the sense of humour that permeates your writing, and yet in spite of that there is this depth of seriousness and tenderness. Lovely. Thank you.