Summerabbacat

My apologies @weinerdog. My comment was not meant to be cruel, it was a just a bit of light-hearted fun playing with the titles of various Elvis songs.

You were right of course @John Henry, not even a hint of an Elvis conspiracy. It was merely the Suspicious Minds of a few of us that conjured up such nonsense (well it was me mainly). The grotesque nature of the crimes of William Parker III, particularly the one involving Justin, drove me to the Edge Of Reality. He was clearly the type of person one would want to Return To Sender as it appeared he was the Devil In Disguise. I am intrigued as to why the revelations regarding the type of person William Parker III was have been made. William Parker IV aka Billy was I think unnecessarily abrasive at times in his rebuke of Diego. His response to Diego’s enquiries could have been tempered with a little more humility, something which he does not appear to be well acquainted with. Whilst one has to admire his ability to cut through the legalese and reduce his opponents to quivering fools, I feel he should be cautioned with Don't Be Cruel.

If Russ had limited his "offer" to free gym membership, Brian and Gordon may well have accepted it, but to then offer free holiday accommodation at a location with maximum appeal to Toby was a bit much. Russ' comment that he recently acquired a company and that the property on offer was part of this acquisition and he needed someone to housesit it whilst he determines what to do with it, was a bit too coincidental to be believed. In my opinion, Gordon and Brian rightfully declined the offer as such generous offers usually come with strings attached, even if those strings are not yet apparent to either the offeror or the offeree. As a compromise perhaps Russ could invite Owain and Colin to join Brian, Gordon and Toby. Owain and Colin could stay in France with the trio from Parborough and then travel to Italy to be joined by Dames Judi, Maggie and Joan (if her failing eyesight allowed her to travel). Your stories are a true delight @Robert Hugill. I love the British humour apparent in both and the matter-of-fact way the characters realise and address the ordinary and the extraordinary. Toby is almost too good to be true. He still retains a naive charm, which only adds to his appeal.

Being an Aussie who grew up in the 70's and watched a healthy dose of British TV, I am very familiar with idioms from England and to a lesser extent Scotland, the birth nation of my paternal grandfather. Those from Wales and Ireland are lesser known and I find it much harder to understand anyone with a strong accent from either of these countries, and in the case of the former forget about trying to read or pronounce the written word. The extent of my knowledge of Wales is that it is cold, damp and the birth nation of the incomparable Dame Shirley Bassey, one of, if not the greatest live performer I have ever seen.

"Does that mean that you're staying proper?" Oh how wonderful the English language is @Robert Hugill. When Joe made this statement I initially thought he was being impertinent and cheeky, querying if Owain was remaining "faithful and true" to Colin now they had cemented their "boyfriend" status, but then I quickly realised he was likely enquiring if Owain was going to remain living in Netherwich. I was surprised by Colin's revelation that he has never been to church because his parents did not believe in it. I felt certain his mother's quick agreement with Miles' homophobic rant must have been formed by religious hysteria, but it seems that this is not the case. I am pleased Mhairi has had a change of heart regarding Joe's theatrical aspirations, and that she felt compelled to apologise for her ungracious behaviour (I am being nice) when Owain offered to pay for Joe's experience. There is hope for her yet, particularly if she continues to distance herself from the church of her upbringing and maintain her belief that her father and ex-husband were both a pair of arseholes. I was also pleased to witness Joe's sense of self. He is not beholden to his girlfriend, which at his age is often not the case. I can recall at his age many guys in my class at school were what one would now refer to as "pussy whipped". More delights from your pen @Robert Hugill. I am enjoying your writing very much, quintessentially English (like Kate Bush and David Bowie, both of whom I admire greatly).

There are so many possibilities @weinerdog which could have caused Diego's exclamation, and I don't think you give yourself enough credit. Many is the time you have "predicted" the outcome of an emerging plot line in some of the stories we have both read. I so enjoy speculating in circumstances such as this and find that once again I cannot resist the temptation to do so, unlike @chris191070 who has the strength of character to resist such temptation. My speculations, for what they are worth: William Parker III is the spitting image of Thomas Walker and may possibly be his father William Parker III is the spitting image of Calvin and may possibly be his father William Parker III bears a strong resemblance to Donna and may possibly have been her father William Parker III is the spitting image of Elvis and may possibly have been his "love-child" William Parker III in addition to being a lawyer and criminal was a part-time Elvis impersonator who married people in a Las Vegas wedding chapel, including Calvin and Donna Diego slept with William Parker III when he was a younger man who was just starting to realise his attraction to men William Parker III aka Wilhelmina Parquet was the first drag queen Diego met when he emerged on the "gay scene" I have to agree with Diego's assessment of Billy's response to the negative Google review made by a woman whose boyfriend he represented. Even if her review was unjustified or a complete fabrication, his response was not the hallmark of professionalism one would expect. A most enjoyable chapter @John Henry. Most of my speculations are of course absurd, but then again there may be one or more of them with even a grain of truth.

The only saving grace in this scenario @raven1 is that I don't think Jackie is very bright, cunning perhaps, and Hudson is. I have to agree with you in that I don't think Jackie is likely to give up on his pursuit of Otis, particularly if he does discover Hudson and Vegas are one and the same. I doubt he would "play fair" if he discovers this, he would do everything he could to discredit Hudson to ingratiate himself into Otis' good books.

Does the quick hearing of Charlie and Joey's living arrangements portend trouble is a brewing. With the vitriolic snotty homophobe Miss Fussypants (Debbie Dogooder) keen to remove Joey from the clutches of his "evil gay" brother anything is possible. I just hope she has not been able to line up a homophobic judge to hear the matter, but given it is in Florida I wonder if there is anything such as a non-homophobic judge. Another well written chapter @Karl Anders. The "budding" relationship between Joey and Peni is an interesting one, particularly with Miss Fussypants on the warpath.

Unfortunate accidents occur daily @Cane23, or think of it as something akin to spring cleaning or taking out the garbage. I am going to think of it as having a Beverly Sutphin moment. If you have ever seen John Waters' wonderful film Serial Mom you will understand what I am referring to, if not, Kathleen Turner plays the perfect suburban wife and mother, Beverly Sutphin, who is a serial killer on the side, albeit a highly principled serial killer, killing those in her community guilty of heinous crimes such as refusing to recycle; refusing to rewind their rented videos before returning them to the store where her son, Chip, works; calling her husband on the weekend for emergency dental work; and, perhaps the most heinous crime of all, committed by a jury member played by Patty Hearst, wearing white shoes AFTER Labor Day. One of my favourite John Waters films, with Kathleen Turner truly magnificent. My favourite scene is her driving the family station wagon (one of those large American things with fake wood panelling on the side) whilst singing along to Barry Manilow's Daybreak after having just murdered her son's teacher at parent/teacher night for having suggested her parenting is adversely affecting Chip, causing him to have a fascination for horror films. She ran over said teacher repeatedly in the school carpark with the said station wagon.

I knew nothing of Bournemouth @Robert Hugill other than having heard of it. A review of its Wikipedia listing revealed it is quite an attractive seaside city and experiences some relatively warm weather (although nothing like we have in Australia, hot weather which I love). I assume it attracts numerous tourists so is the type of place I envisage Deirdre would get plenty of work, but as for Jasper who knows (and who cares apart from Deirdre). Perhaps either one or both will meet an unfortunate end, drowning at one of the many beaches or eaten by a shark. I have little doubt that if Denise had not heard of Jasper and Deirdre's impending departure that Deirdre would not have bothered to disclose it to Brian and perhaps may have "left in the middle of the night" without even telling Toby. Whilst it may hurt that his mother appears to care little for him, he is fortunate to have a father and "stepfather" and grandparents who take an active interest in him and involve themselves in his life. He is better off without the silly cow. The sooner Deirdre buggers off the better. Brian, Gordon and Russ a throuple perhaps? First there was Brangelina, then came some other forgettable couple whose name I can no longer remember. Now to surpass them all, Gorianus, a combination of Gor(don), (Br)ian and (R)us(s), and if they keep on experimenting with these double penetrations, it could be very bloody gory.

It seems that my less than serious Australian sense of humour has been misunderstood. I was not advocating for the murder of Miles or even the maiming of him, merely pointing out that his behaviour was such that he deserved neutering. A good swift kick to the balls or something similar may be enough to ensure he cannot reproduce any more. Having said this, there are some actions of some humans which I would not be sorry to see them "ended" for.

My given name is David @Anton_Cloche and my Ukrainian Jewish female friend, Olga, would often refer to me as Davidka. She would often say "you cannot teach stupid" when referring to those whose religious convictions were such that they beggared belief, denied any commonsense or evidence (she was secular). In this instance, the reference to "stupid" was those of our fellow species who persist in their beliefs that homosexuality and paedophilia are virtually one and the same, even though there exists ample and irrefutable evidence to the contrary.

Annalisa leaving Miles and taking the children with her would be some payback for Miles @Cane23, but I have no doubt Miles and his mother would blame Annalisa completely, she would be branded a "good for nothing harlot" or something akin to this. Who knows, with their warped perception of reality, they may even find Colin, and by extension Owain, to somehow be responsible for such a calamitous event. After all, everyone knows how powerful "the gays" are, the harbinger's of natural disasters of all kinds because of "God's wrath". Puhlease.

What a gamut of emotions experienced by Colin and Owain in this chapter (and by this reader too). Colin understandably was pleasantly surprised by his workers' reaction to the revelation he is gay. Whilst mostly positive, they like so many others demonstrated their ignorance with the often uttered statement that as long he is not a "kiddie fiddler" they had no issue with him. Paedophilia and homosexuality are very different and yet so many still seem to think they are intrinsically linked. As a friend of mine has often said, "You cannot teach stupid Davidka" (said with a very heavy Ukrainian accent and the conviction of the stereotypical Jewish mother). Colin was understandably livid with his mother and his bully of a brother. Whilst I abhor American gun laws there are times one could see a use for a firearm. In this instance a gun capable of neutering Miles could have served Owain well. Colin should definitely turn his back on both his mother and brother until such time as both apologise to him and Miles apologises to Owain. And to the beautifully emotional part of the chapter, the part that had me weeping profusely with joy and delight. Colin's acknowledgment and obvious appreciation of why a visit to the church service at the Minster is so important to Owain, to honour Lily. Great chapter @Robert Hugill. I look forward to more, with the trip to Italy being a highlight to come I am sure. Perhaps you could arrange an accident for Miles and his mother whilst Colin and Owain are in Italy, such that both Miles and mother are laid to rest in the Garden of Rest, but certainly not at the Minster. The Brethren sounds more suited to their beliefs.

The "Big Orange Pieces" and the "Big Blue Pieces" sound hideous, but I suspect I would probably like them as I like colour. The banter between Gordon and Drew was comical, they have a very healthy relationship built on a mutual "disrespect" and cynicism for each other's profession of choice, Gordon's utilitarian career and Drew's artistic and chaotic career. Underneath the disrespect is a genuine fondness for each other. Drew's comment "I take it that means that Gordon's exclamation there was literal as well as metaphorical. Bloody hell." had me guffawing too. He clearly has no problem at all with Gordon's sexuality. I am not sure I believe Russ' statement that he did not know Drew was Gordon's father. He is slowly inserting himself into their lives (as well as into their pants), but I don't think, as I first did, that he has any sinister motive. I think he might be attracted to their unconventional family and be genuinely enjoying the companionship it offers (as well as a bit of cock from time to time). He struck me again in this chapter as someone filling the void of loneliness with business and acquiring wealth. Another very enjoyable chapter @Robert Hugill. Still no appearance from Deirdre and Jasper, perhaps they have gone to visit Colin's mother and Miles. I imagine they would all get along famously. Jasper and Miles could bemoan the state of the nation with "all these bloody queers" getting recognition for their unnatural lifestyles. Jimmy could join in the conversation and bitch about that "shirt lifter" Owain.

Colin and his "floozy" are building a solid friendship, one which is beneficial to both as neither appears to have much in the way of other friends. Colin's mother and Miles responded to his outing himself with predictability. His mother had to make it all about herself of course, and Miles chose to make himself look like the narrow-minded bigot he so obviously is. Perhaps Owain can introduce him to Nathan, they can commiserate the woes of being a WASP male in a world being overrun by "the gays". Maybe it is time Annalise kicked him to the kerb. My heart bleeds for them @Robert Hugill. NOT.

Steve is the key to the unity of the household. He is somewhat divorced from the drama unfolding between Diego, Bryan and Caleb having not been around when most of what is dividing them went down. He is also more emotionally intelligent than Diego, what I mean by this is he is able to detach himself whereas Diego is more volatile and more easily enraged and upset, which although not a bad thing, is not ideal in situations such as the family now finds itself. Steve's interaction with Caleb at the end of the chapter a perfect illustration of this. @John Henry an upsetting chapter, but one which needed to happen for the story to remain realistic. I am "praying" for Calvin to fuck up soon and expose himself to be the fraudster we know him to be. When he is taken down, I just hope he takes at least Thomas Walker with him.

Calhoun is determined to find Micco guilty of Sam's murder; is he somehow tied to the murder of Micco's mother and sister. Micco had just called Martina, his call went unanswered and Calhoun arrives to arrest him. Coincidence, probably, but maybe not. Martina is involved in the murder or at least in framing Micco for it, of this I am convinced. Why? I have no idea. "Chase tipped my chin up with his finger. “Stop making it sound like a disease.” “It’s weird,” I hissed. No matter what Billie said about being touched by the spirits, I hated being different. “Micco.” The pressure on my chin grew insistent, so I raised my gaze to his. “It’s not weird. It’s amazing.” I am in agreement with Chase, it's amazing. I may have made this comment before I think, but I have to wonder if Micco's gift of communication with his non-human friends makes him more vulnerable in his dealing with humans, more prone to anxiety, given the intensity of his feelings? Chase loved Micco and clearly still does. The animals will reunite them. Powerfully and beautifully written chapter @Libby Drew. I found myself weeping profusely (again) for Micco, Chase and at the end for the animals. I chose the sad emoticon as I fear for the safety of the wolves and panthers with the approaching hurricane.

Such gaiety, even in the morning. Brian and Gordon are a wonderful example for Toby and Noah. Noah only has his parents whom he rarely interacts with and his apparently pious grandmother whom he does not particularly want to interact with, so having adults who enjoy his company and have a kinship with him, must be a joy to experience. Toby is most fortunate to have parents like Brian and Gordon, although Martina and Val are by no means cruel or neglectful, they just rarely have time for Noah. Another enjoyable chapter to delight and once again amuse @Robert Hugill. If this were the Grammy's or the Golden Globes or something similar, you would have to be a nominee (at least) for the best new artist/newcomer.

I was actually only thinking of Room With A View (which I am not ashamed to say I love). I had forgotten about Tea With Mussolini which I also loved. I have them both on DVD and watch them from time to time. I thought Cher was exceptionally good in the latter, more than held her own against the Grand Dames of British cinema (Joan Plowright was terrific too as well as was Lily Tomlin). A friend of mine thought Cher really was Jewish after seeing the movie. Perhaps an afternoon of blazing passion with Gabriel and Lorenzo might be enjoyable for all (including we readers).

An afternoon of listening to Dean Martin crooning could inflame their passions @Robert Hugill.

A trip to Italy. How delightful. Wonderful regional cuisine, attractive men and lots of amore. Perhaps they might run into Maggie Smith and Judi Dench, or better still Brian and Gordon. @Robert Hugill you have a real talent for making the ordinary or commonplace appear enchanting and beautiful. As stated by @Cane23, neither Colin nor Owain are Men's Health models (Colin would probably be very popular in Bear and/or Daddy porn), which I believe only increases their appeal. I also find Owain's whimsical sense of humour very attractive. His whimsy is the perfect antidote to Colin's more reserved behaviour.

The ugly and vitriolic "Miss Fussypants" was the first one to break the law when she said "That proves he's gay". You cannot say that word in Florida Miss Fussypants as you may be promoting depravity. I think @Dan South got it right when he said she could use a toy or two to loosen her up a bit. She is so uptight, little Miss Republican buybull thumper. Marjorie and Lauren would be proud of you Debbie. Only one good Debbie has ever originated from Florida, the incomparable Deborah Harry, and she got the hell out of there and moved to New York (her birth name was Angela and she was adopted by a couple from New Jersey, but that does not "fit in" with this story). It is easy to make light of this scenario and dismiss Debbie as a delusional lunatic, but to an outsider (I am an Australian) this type of right-wing fringe crusader hellbent on exposing the "gays" appears to be an increasing minority in the USA. You only have to read about such extremist groups as Moms For Liberty to realise the USA is full of very dangerous, well organised, well funded and in many cases well armed, right-wing haters. Anita Bryant had nothing on these bitches.

I was pleasantly surprised Denise was even more broad-minded than I thought she was. I wonder if she will share the nude photograph(s) of Brian and Gordon with her friend Vera (gotta love that name @Robert Hugill, makes me think of Auntie Mame's actress friend Vera Charles and Vera Collins, a fashionista and clairvoyant from the Australian adult-soapie from the 1970's Number 96). I have a nasty feeling something unsavoury or newsworthy is going to happen at one of Russ Kahn's parties which will be leaked to the press, something which Deirdre will seize upon, encouraged by the odious Jasper, to make life at least uncomfortable for Brian and Gordon. Of course it will not occur to her, or if it does she will not care as it is all about her, that Toby may be unsettled or unhappy as a result.

You are being the voice of reason and taking a conciliatory approach @drsawzall. You are no fun at all, being nice to poor little Mhairi (LOL). Half the fun of many of the stories on GA is being an unreasonable bitch and lacerating "cast members" who piss you off for one reason or another. I hate to acknowledge this because I want to enjoy being unreasonable, but you have made some good points, although I do think Mhairi behaved ungraciously if nothing else. I hope she at least has the decency to apologise for insinuating Owain made a choice in leaving home. I have to wonder if she is secretly jealous that he had the courage to leave, albeit under duress, and stay away, whilst she stuck around and became increasingly resentful.