SilentandBroken

So, wait, is that same barn the same one he hid in the first day? Zander’s family? I’m so confused

Now the only real option he has is to stay and come clean to at least his friends who hopefully can get him help and support. That’s gonna be hard for him to do and I think the person to get him to allow himself to do so is Zander

Don’t be sorry. I’ve MOSTLY healed. . I’ve learn to accept what I had by a way of a support system (if you could call it that) as a young teen wasn’t what it should’ve been. I don’t blame my parents. They were..are ignorant in a lot of ways. The trouble is, it isn’t like most ppl where you can educate them now. The damage was done and if I tried to tell them now what it was like then, they’d try to make up for it and only make it worse. My mother is what I can an accidental narcissist. She means well but doesn’t realize how she sounds, what her actions do, or actually listens to you when you tell her to leave you alone. I love my mom. I do..but I can only take so much. So we speak only typically every few weeks even though we only live 2 mi from each other. It hurts because I KNOW my deliberate distancing causes her pain and she doesn’t understand why, I know no amount of me trying to explain it to her will ever sink in. It’s all I can do to protect myself and even then sometimes, especially around the holidays, it’s not enough. It’s kind of hard to explain

This small clique of friends is exactly what Andy needs. It’s exactly where he can stop running and hiding and putting his masks and walls up…he just doesn’t realize it yet. I think he feels ..something but is unable to identify it for what it is. From everything that has been shown so far, this small town is an everything blue collar and wholesome. Where parents don’t hate their children and love them as they’re supposed to. Unconditionally.

Ugh! I was all happy and set to blurt out “Called it” from my comment prediction in the last chapter on Andy’s schedule change and then I hit the section where Zander came out to his folks. OMG that hit home. Not in the way you might think. I can’t relate. Well, I only could’ve in my dreams but my life is much different now and I’m waaay past high school. Helluva chapter.

New math new classmate. Or new physics new partner. Lunch boy

Andy is playing Russian roulette here.

Another good chapter. It’s good to see Eustace trust Eric a bit to do things totally unsupervised while he went into town. That said, it’s better Eric delivered. I wonder if delivering those bags of garden pickings to old T where another artful way of Eustace probing his own subtle investigation. I think had Eric recognized the name as kin and especially since that’s the house Eric thinks Eustace thinks he lives, Eric‘S reaction to Eustace would’ve been different and Eustace I think knows it. I think he’s setting Eric up to have to explain things and either he’ll able to cover with another lie only to have it discovered or they’ll cut right to it and something is gonna come out that won’t be able to be answered and covered in a lie. Eustice gives me the impression he knows or at least highly suspects more much more than he’s telling. Eric flinching at the dinner table and Eustice catching it I think confirmed a big suspicion to Eustice and it means it’s only a matter of time now. You can only lie your way so much. My only fears now are that Eric is going to get caught stealing food and or caught in the barn loft squatting.

Ok first off, I don’t blame Eric for trying to fit in. In fact I applaud him. Just the fact that he encouraged himself in the bathroom for one night, just have one night, was a big step. Then, after Carrot-Top showed up and showed his ass..sigh well alcohol and testosterone are poor partners. You’d think society would learn by now🤣 anyway, I am not blaming Toby either. The power of the all mighty pussy will win out every single time with a straight guy. It’s unfortunate but whatever. I wish Eustace would’ve pressed more on Eric. The kid trusts him enough he might just start to crack if for no other reason but desperation right now. What happens if winter hits he’s still not under a HOUSE roof? He better start thinking longer term than just tomorrow and soon.

You could say he was hot for more than one reason 😝

Glad you are. I’m back to 101.5 temp bleh

Oooh Eric you got yourself into a pickle now. You’re lucky Toby didn’t try to make you remove that shirt so you didn’t overheat.

Your warm thoughts and encouragement help thank you. Sigh. A lot of my trauma started around a boy who was a narcissist abuser, using that “power” to control me and manipulate me and rape a few times. That started at 13. I was a freshman, he a sophomore. Things got bad quietly when i finally grew a spine and tried to end it. He called me over to his house before school one morning, and from 15 feet away i watched him out a snubbed nosed 22 revolver to his temple and pull the trigger. I blamed myself for decades. I’m mostly passed it now. Therapy has done tons. But triggers still happen. My brother is one. I love him bc well..he’s my brother ya know? But he’s got his own demons and poor coping skills to go along with even more shitty decisions. I just can’t anymore. I can’t be around him and his drama. I don’t want to cauterize the relationship but I’m afraid I need to. It saddens me and the fact that he viewed suicide as his only option to fix his life. Fix? Hmph. More like quit. He refused to listen to anyone’s advice, only asking once he’s made up his mind to see if anyone could convince him to change his mind. He’ll do it again if the docs cut him loose soon. Now he’s really fucked his life over. This hole he’s dug suddenly got very deep. I won’t lie, I’m very very worried for him.

Eustace reminds me somewhat of my grandfather. Strong, quiet, hard working. Observant

He’s got you figured out boy. You just don’t know it yet.

Ah farm work. I grew up learning that. Makes me miss it. I can even smell those hay bales. Stefan would be better to come open up a little about his story. At the very least say he’s not related to the other Anderson’s and has no place to stay. I have a good feeling about this old guy.

He better hoof it off the road all together but keep the road in sight for a bearing. 10-1 that trooper is swinging back around. I just hope he didn’t touch anything. If that trooper pulls his prints off the dash or door, he’s gonna pop.

I saw the title and thought oh no… upon finishing I’m glad he got away save a little work. lot lizard life is no life worth living. He’s much to good for that life. good chapter.

Why is it always the hot boys are the meanest ones? Poor Stefan. Ugh.

I neglected to comment on the lady allowing him to mow her lawn and giving him a $20 bill. I think she might’ve sensed at least suspected something. He’s very much like a stray dog who’s famished and guarded. She didn’t want to prod but I think the comment of him coming back soon too again was indicative of her thoughts. Had she come right out and asked if he was out on the streets, Stefan would’ve bolted. I know I would’ve.

Sadly they do. Humans can be so cruel to one another.

@Parker Owens well I’m hooked now as I love long novellas like this. It’s a rarity that 16 year olds can navigate high school anyway. That’s with friends and a good home and social life. Throw in social stigmas like a rumor of being gay and an abusive father all while trying to hide it all only complicates life. Clueless is right. But you don’t have to thank me. I should be thanking you for your work. It’s excellent.

A much needed break for sure and a breath of hope. The scene the boy is more telling than stated. Stefan could have easily ran off for fear of an adult discovering him and reporting him to the authorities. He could’ve lashed out angrily at the kid for interrupting his sleep, possibly jading that kid too. But he didn’t. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to satisfy the kid with his lack of baseball skills but he didn’t care. As luck would have it, the kid was waay more patient than most his age and that makes me wonder now that they’ve traded names, will this kid pop up elsewhere further down the road? If Stefan stays in town a bit and meets someone special, could the kid be their lil’ bro? I think the tracks is a bit risky but it’s a small enough town maybe Stefan will be alright.

Stefan is so incredibly strong to not provoke is father so he didn’t finish him off. I’m not sure I’d have had the strength myself . Who knows. The abuse horrid but realistic. Personally I would’ve kept the hammer a weapon of self defense. You can see his fauty thought processes and logic in his decisions with the shower and fixing food. I think I would’ve bailed and got food later.