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22 Thorn in the Side
Nephylim commented on Archangel_of_Pain's story chapter in 22 Thorn in the Side
Very nice. It is such a complete contrast to the way he is with Cam. I wonder what is going to happen to Mark when he finds out and eventually he is going to have to surely. This is so exciting. All the characters stand out, they are all unique in their own way and ust so exciting -
Am I the first review. I hope so. I so love this story. You have me on the edge of my seat the whole time. This is truly outstanding work and i have my heart in my mouth for poor Cam. Gabriel sounds interesting but I don't trust him, not for one minute.
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We were late down for breakfast, or perhaps we were early for lunch. Kate and Jake were in the living room watching television. They both looked up and grinned when we entered and I blushed deeply. Daniel had quite recovered his equilibrium by now and he simply grinned. “You look better.” “I feel great.” “How does the hand feel?” “It’s killing me but that’s a pain I can live with.” “You don’t have to live with it. Let me take a look.” While Kate was taking care of Daniel in t
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After the euphoria wore off Kate made snacks and we sat eating and drinking and getting to know each other and the only word for it was... mellow. I curled up on the sofa with Daniel and he pulled me close and kept his arm protectively around me. After a time reaction set it and I was dozing when Daniel shook me gently back to awareness. “Josh... you look as exhausted as I feel. What do you say about getting some sleep?” “Here?” “If that’s alright with you? Kate and Jake said they d
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By the time I turned my attention back to Daniel, Sue had him lying flat out on the sofa and was leaning over him, not touching but speaking softly, so softly that I could not hear what she was saying. Daniel was lying very still, staring unblinkingly at the ceiling. He seemed to be listening intently to what she was saying, a slight frown on his face. Before she finished speaking he nodded his head once and closed his eyes. Once or twice after that he murmured something which was
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When I awoke it was dark outside. No light was filtering through the curtains. The light came from the door, which was open. Kate was standing at the side of the bed. She had woken me. Daniel stirred in my arms and his sigh washed over my throat and made me shiver. “Josh?” He still sounded sleepy but more aware than before. “I’m here.” For a moment Daniel held me close, his arms tight about me and then he pulled me hard to him and let me go, rolling onto
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I couldn’t sit still. The thought that Daniel was here... so close... again. I paced around the room, picking things up and putting them down again. What if he didn’t want to see me... again? What if he turned me away... again? Kate and Jake seemed nice, very nice. I couldn’t believe what they told me about Daniel. I mean I could believe easily enough that he had done it, that would be so like him. But to think that when I had been sitting cosy in Charlie’s den, drinking whisk
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Daniel woke with a start, feeling completely disoriented. He was lying in a soft, warm bed in a room that was dark and cool. There were curtains pulled across the large windows but it was possible to see that, on the other side of them the sun was up and shining strongly enough to make patterns on parts of them that were thinner than the rest. In some places there were tiny holes in the dark material and the relentless rays were sneaking through, painting stripes on the darkness filled with spin
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Lost in the darkness Daniel wandered in dreams of blood and fire. Fuelled by alcohol and adrenaline the dreams spiralled him into a world of pain and fear which was so intense that, although he was not aware of it, being deeply asleep , his body twisted and moaned, tears pouring down his face, mixing with the blood on the sand to make a gory pillow for his tortured head. Some time before dawn, when deep exhaustion had claimed and stilled him, a shadow, darker than those in which he
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Daniel ran. He didn’t know where he was going or why he was running, he just knew that he was filled with a bitter raging anger like he had never known before and, beneath that a fear so keen it would have paralysed him if he hadn’t kept moving. He had to keep moving. Charlie lived in a seaside town and Daniel arrived at the seafront just as the day life was petering out and the nightlife beginning. Gaggles of girls in short skirts giggled and wiggled along the promenade stalked by men in open
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Daniel refused to talk to me, that day or any other day. All he would say was that something had happened to him and that every time I touched his belly it hurt, it hurt a lot. Eventually we had fallen asleep in each other’s arms, Daniel first from sheer exhaustion and me hours later, still stroking his hair, still whispering to him, still scared, still hurting, and still weeping. The next day we had tried again, and again, and again, with the same results. There were no more tears
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Daniel was released from hospital in the early afternoon and his parents drove us back to my flat. They had wanted him to go home with them but understood when he stated quite firmly that he wanted to be with me, to get back to normal as soon as possible. Of course his mother was worried about him but the doctor had reassured her that he was perfectly healthy although he had suggested, not in front of Daniel, that they might think of arranging an appointment with a psychologist or counsellor.
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We all stayed with Daniel, speaking in soft voices, watching him sleep until about ten o’clock when the stress of the day got the better of Mrs Owen and she literally collapsed, crying quietly. Her husband insisted that she needed to have a proper rest and that was impossible in the cramped hospital room where the only furniture was a bench and one hard arm chair. They kissed Daniel, who barely stirred in acknowledgement, and left to check in to the closest hotel. I curled up in t
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The darkness was shot with sparkling flashes of red. At first Daniel found it interesting and watched it with dispassionately. That was until the darkness began to recede and the flashes turned into stabs of pain, shooting through his head with almost rhythmic regularity. Eventually they shattered the darkness and he sat up with a groan. It was a bad move and he only just made it to the toilet in the corner before vomiting violently into the bowl. Given that he had eaten nothing
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When I got back the first thing I did was telephone Daniel’s parents. They were shocked and angry but they believed me. They told me to hang fire and that they would get back to me. I then went round to Daniel’s house. The door was opened by one of his housemates, Giani, a very beautiful Italian. At first he was enthusiastic, hugging me and kissing my cheeks before I could even get out a word. “Joshua... it is so good to see you home. We have missed you so much. And where is t
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The journey back to consciousness was a long one. First he became aware of something soft under his cheek, something that smelled of sweat and dampness, then of the narrow hardness of the bed on which he was lying, then the fact that his body was uncomfortable, cold and cramped and finally that it was still and silent and dim. Slowly, cautiously, he opened his eyes and saw his own hand, lying on the pillow next to his head. For a moment he was distracted, wondering at the fact the fingers t
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I woke some time in the night feeling strange, very strange. The duvet had fallen off me and a breeze was blowing on the back of my neck making me shiver. But it wasn’t that which was making me feel so odd, it was... it was... Coming fully awake I snatched Daniel’s hand from between my legs and twisted round. It hadn’t been a breeze on the back of my neck, but his breath. He grinned. It was a bright, moonlit night... I think it might have been a full moon and I could see him cle
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Daniel didn’t go home that night, or the next. We spent the whole time exploring each other... mentally, physically, emotionally. He drew truth from me like I drew water from the tap. I was wholly incapable of lying to him, no matter how painful the truth was... and he had a knack of asking searching questions that got to the heart of every situation. I couldn’t get enough of him... his voice, his smell, his touch... especially his touch. He explored every inch of my body with his
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True to his word Daniel made no demands on me at all. He lounged on the battered sofa, glowing like a jewel and talked. He also listened when I talked which, for me, was a first. He made me feel that he was genuinely interested in what I said. He seemed to understand. I told him about my family, my childhood, my struggle to find an identity in an environment where individuality was not encouraged. I was a good boy, a god fearing boy, a helpful and polite boy... just like all the
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Daniel literally sweeps Josh off his feet. They fall in love. Josh's parents are devout Christians and are not happy about it. The arrange a surprise for Daniel which ends up tearing them all apart.
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Daniel Owen was dangerous. I knew that the moment I first set eyes on him. It wasn’t the leather bands that encircled his wrists encrusted with metal studs and pentacles. It wasn’t his slim hips encased in leather or even the wild sweep of his black hair, liberally streaked with turquoise. No, it was the look in his eyes... the bluest of blue, as startling and turquoise as his hair; a look that swept over me and made me turn, at the same time, hot and cold and feel naked and exposed.
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Chapter 20: Dinner With a Surprise
Nephylim commented on Andrew Q Gordon's story chapter in Chapter 20: Dinner With a Surprise
I suppose I need to review the whole story now as all the chapter ones have disappeared. This is a very 'real' story. You have made the characters believable and very rounded so that we care what happens to them. The story has unfolded smoothly and naturally and there are one or two scenes that totally stick in the mind. My favourite is the date in the restaurant. This new chapter is delightful and I could have been 'there' -
Thank you for reviewing. I hope the confusion was cleared up at the end. If not, let me know what particularly confused you and I can edit the story to make it clearer. I'm glad you feel my stories are exciting, that's what they're meant to be. Who wants to read a story that's boring
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“Where are we going?” “To the summerhouse.” “Summerhouse? Why?” “You’ll see when we get there.” “You’re being very mysterious.” He links his arm with mine and rests his head on my shoulder as we walk. I shake my arm free and wrap it around him, pulling him close to me. It is a beautiful day, the sun is shining, on its way down and there is a cool breeze that ruffles our hair like the fingers of a lover. However, as soon as we step within the maze a chill falls on us, enough to mak
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It really doesn’t get better than this. I have Bridge cuddled in to my side with Sacha lying on my other side ticking my chest and Star, glorious Star propped up on the other side of Bridge toying with his hair while his eyes... ravish me. I find myself drowsing, time slows down and the moment feels eternal. “See? I told you if you just relaxed a little life could be good.” “What the...?” “Sssh. I’m not really here and you know it. I’m getting ready to go but I need you to do one more thin
