The List - 4. Chapter 4: Rusty

Specimen’s name: Rusty

Height: 5’10

Build: 195, athletic/muscular

Occupation: Student (Pre-Med), Sigma

Age: 22, Senior

After sleeping with Kyle, I have to admit, I went through a sort of reflection stage. I mean, here I was a month and three guys into the list. I was starting to see men differently, approach them differently. I found myself flirting with any guy that looked at me for more than a second. At the gym, I caught myself looking at a guy while he was toweling off after a workout. At the Starbucks, I found myself chatting up a new barista when he asked how I liked my latte. I was officially more than just experimenting; I was into guys.

One thing I couldn’t get over was how into Kyle I was. It wasn’t just about hooking up and fucking him (he had yet to even ask if he could fuck me). He as so nice and cute (I decided he reminded me of Eric Van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl). After we woke up that Saturday morning, to show him that I wasn’t some pervert taking advantage of his body, I asked him to dinner that night. He said he already had plans, but we should meet up for lunch on Monday.

I stayed in and caught up on reading Saturday night. When Spencer came home on Sunday afternoon, he looked through the list and saw I’d already added Kyle.

“You and Kyle?” he said, looking a little surprised. He began writing his own entry.

“Yeah,” I said. “I wasn’t going to write it in there. He was specific about me not telling you.”

“Well, that’s weird,” Spencer said, scribbling away. Apparently he’d hooked up with a swimmer from the Baylor swim team that was staying in the same hotel as our guys. I would have paid to see how hot that was. “But it doesn’t really surprise me.”

“Did you guys ever…” I began to ask.

“Oh god no,” he said. “He’s like a brother to me, are you joking? I meant people used to wonder. They’d ask me if he was and I always said no, that he was just shy around girls. Don’t worry, buddy. He’s all yours.”

For some reason I couldn’t describe, I was relieved. It’s wasn’t like I wanted a relationship with Kyle or anything. I just didn’t want to know that he was sticking it to my roommate. I knew I liked him and I knew I needed to figure out really quickly just how much.

In the spirit of investigation, I needed to clear my mind and my sexual schedule. I opted to meet David at an office instead of his apartment for our Sunday evening session. We’d already banged at our first two meetings and I wanted to make it clear I needed a break.

“What’s up?” he said, coming into the study office after I’d been there for about thirty seconds. He was wearing tight jeans and two layered tank tops—black on top of red. He was holding his sweater in his hands. “Sorry, I took this off on the bike ride over.”

“I’m sure that was a sight,” I said, smiling at him. I decided to rip the band-aid off and address the situation at the start. “Listen, I’d appreciate it if we kept our sessions to just studying from now on, at least until I figure a couple of things out.” I didn’t want to tell him I had agreed to go out with a guy for the first time tomorrow or that I was trying to figure out my feelings for said guy. But I did want to keep the door open in case it didn’t work out with Kyle and I wanted a rebound fuck with David.

His face didn’t change. He was too old and experienced to let a freshman disappoint him. Instead, he surprised me by asking, “A couple of things like what?”

“I mean, this whole deal. I’m not used to feeling this way about…” I began. He interrupted me.

“Guys? No worries, man, I get it,” he said, sitting down, not sounding in the least bit disappointed. “I was exactly where you are when I was a freshman. New experience, just trying to figure out what you’re really feeling. It’s overwhelming at first and then you sort it all out. It gets better. Trust me.” And that was that. “You can come to me any time you wanna talk. Or anything,” he added, smiling.

We didn’t talk about it again and David went on helping me appreciate theater without once acting like he’d seen me naked.

My lunch with Kyle on Monday was pretty cool and casual and resulted in a more date-like Thursday night dinner invitation. I didn’t tell Spencer I was going on a second date with Kyle until Thursday rolled around and I was getting dressed.

“What, are you dating my old childhood friend now?” he asked while I was getting dressed. I’d just come out of the shower and was toweling myself off, not even bothering to cover up anymore.

“Shut up, prick,” I said. “He has a gift card to the Spaghetti Warehouse in historic downtown that he needs to use, and so he asked me if I wanted to join him.”

“Oh, a gift card dinner,” Spencer said sarcastically. “That explains why you’re stealing my Calvin Klein cologne. Free breadsticks.”

I knew he was joking, but I couldn’t help but wonder if he was actually bothered. Pulling on a pair of slacks sans underwear, I asked him “Hey, are you okay with all of this? I mean, if you’re bothered by me seeing Kyle, I can always end it after this.”

“Of course not, man,” Spencer said. “If you want to date him, go ahead. He’s really cute and I’m sure ya’ll are cute together.”

There wasn’t a hint of jealousy in his voice, so I assumed he was telling the truth. I borrowed a Lacoste polo from Spencer and went on my date.

The whole evening was pretty sweet. For a first man-date, I was surprisingly calm. I mean, I’d been on a million and a half dates before, but it was usually me doing the asking out, planning and paying. Today, it was the exact opposite and I was actually okay with it. The one thing that did feel weird, though, was walking to the passenger’s side of the car instead of the driver’s side. For some reason, I couldn’t wrap my head around it.

We ended up walking around historic downtown for a while after dinner, talking and getting to know each other. It turns out that Dutch was Kyle’s best friend and they all ran in the same circle as Spencer in high school. He confessed to always feeling a little insecure at having such a successful and gorgeous older brother, but he’d managed to stay cool and fit in anyway. It turns out he was a political science major and planned on running for public office at some point—the main reason he hadn’t come out yet.

“I’m not ashamed of being gay and my family is really supportive,” he said. “It’s just if I want a political career of any kind, I have to be careful who I tell and what I do.”

It felt good to be trusted. In the spirit of honesty, I confessed that Spencer had found out about us. I didn’t confess that he’d found out because I told him or that his name was entry number three in my list of conquests.

“Yeah, I figured he might eventually,” Kyle said, dropping his voice a little.

“Look, he respects your privacy. He said he won’t even tell Dutch if you don’t want him to,” I replied. Kyle said he’d talk to Spencer and I shouldn’t worry about it. We went back to walking around and getting to know each other.

I told Kyle all about me—the youngest of four kids with an older brother and two older sisters. All of my siblings had gone to a trade school close to home. I was the only one that had dreams of bigger things: I wanted to be a defense lawyer—the kind you see all the time on TV. I told him I’d had two serious girlfriends in high school but wanted to try something new when I got to SMU.

“How many guys have you been with?” he asked me. I told him two. “Do I know any of them?”

I didn’t answer, but simply shrugged.

“What about you?” I asked him. He held up two fingers, too. I guess we really were on the same page.

I noticed that we were alone on a street outside of the main West End attractions. Deciding to take the moment to be spontaneous, I leaned into Kyle, grabbed his hand and kissed him quickly.

“Let’s get out of here,” I said to him. He kissed me back, this time for longer. Unable to control myself, I looked around, realized we were still alone and pulled Kyle into a small alley between two buildings. I leaned my back against the wall, pulled Kyle close to me and kissed him deeply. He pressed his body into mine and I got a distinct feeling of his hardening cock on my thigh.

“We can’t do this here,” he said heavily, pulling away from me for a second. Not taking that for an answer, I pushed him against the opposite wall and ground my hardening cock into his thigh. “This is where hate crimes go to feed.”\

“You’re right,” I panted, still kissing him. I was so turned on, I wanted to take Kyle right then and there, but knew we should probably go somewhere more discreet. Plus, I didn’t want our second sexing to be in the middle of some random dangerous alley.

“Let’s go to your place,” Kyle said, pushing me away despite my attempt to continue kissing him. Just then a couple passed by us on the main street.

“Spencer is there,” I said. Still close to Kyle, I reached down and felt his crotch. Still hard, just like I thought. “What about your apartment?”

“My roommate is there, too,” he said.

“I can call Spencer,” I said after thinking for a second. “If I tell him I need the room, he’ll go to the study lounge or something.”

Kyle nodded. I pulled out my cell phone just as Kyle was pushing me back against my wall. Instead of kissing me, he started sucking at my neck. To be completely honest, this was about to be my first ever hickey. I’d given a million, and felt like I was pretty good at it. As far as getting them, though, I had no clue my neck was such a sensitive area. My cock stiffened even more and I could tell that Kyle felt it.

“Hey, Spence,” I said.

“Hey, buddy,” he replied. “How’s the date going? You ready for me to come rescue you yet?”

“Actually, I was wondering if you were still in the room?” I panted. I wondered if he could tell I was hooking up with his friend as we spoke.

“No man, I ran out to get some food. I can stay out for a while if you want some privacy with Kyle,” he said.

“That’d be awesome. We’re heading back right now, so give us a couple of hours,” I said.

“Let’s be honest, Cooper,” Spencer replied. “You don’t need that long at all.” He laughed, said it was no problem and then hung up. I pulled Kyle away from me and simply said, “Let’s go,” before heading to the car and driving back to campus.

We went from the car to my apartment and up the stairs to my room in less than three minutes. This time I wasn’t drunk or fumbling, only horny. It was like we couldn’t get in there fast enough. Talk about a great ending to a great date— as soon as the door was closed off, Kyle and I were tearing each other’s cloths off. We were kissing the entire time we could keep our lips together. I pulled Kyle down on top of me as I lay down on my bed, both of us already completely naked and hard as rocks.

“Wanna ride me?” I asked him. Fuck foreplay, I thought. We hadn’t been able to keep our hands off of each other for the past twenty minutes. If he needed me to be romantic and take things slow, he was crazy. I was more than ready to fuck.

“Fuck yeah,” he panted, getting up. I pointed to the drawer where Spencer and I kept our condoms. Kyle, as hungry to get my dick in as I was, leapt across the room, retrieved a condom and was back at my bed in an instant.

“Down boy,” I mocked him. He smiled and told me to shut up. He ripped the condom wrapper open and rolled the rubber onto my cock like a pro. Seconds later, he climbed on top of me, slipped my dick in and started riding, all while my hands were idly placed behind my head.

Everything about it felt good. His tight hole giving me an intense pleasure I couldn’t deal with; the view from below him as he bounced up and down, appreciating every inch of my dick inside of him; the feeling of his long cock bouncing on my stomach, as hard as a rock and ready to explode any second. It was so much better than it had been last weekend. This little guy was so hot as I watched him go up and down on my cock, holding onto my chest to steady himself. I honestly couldn’t take too much more of it. I grabbed his hips with my hands, pulled him up and down slowly a couple more times, closed my eyes and shot the largest load I’m sure I’d ever shot right into the condom in his ass.

Apparently feeling me come was more than enough to make Kyle lose it, and within an instant, his cock bobbed and a huge blob of semen hit me square in the chest. He came for what felt like hours, rope after rope coating my torso with hot stickiness. I couldn’t do anything except smile and hold him.

He collapsed next to me, lightly rubbing his own cum around my chest. I could feel it cooling, something that would have drove me insane a few weeks ago but a feeling I’d come to tolerate.

“That was fucking awesome,” he said. “I didn’t think we’d ever make it to the room.”

“I know,” I replied, still panting and spent. “Un-fucking-real.” Something about being told how good I was, about knowing how appreciative he was, was a real turn on to me. I couldn’t explain it.

I was suddenly extremely sleepy. I knew if we lay there, Spencer would come home soon and find us in bed together. Although I didn’t care, I didn’t think Kyle would be too comfortable with that. I sat up, pulled on some shorts and grabbed a towel to wipe off.

“Wanna go get some coffee?” I asked.

“Yeah, I suppose we should get moving before Spence gets back,” he replied. The whole time we were getting redressed, I wondered if this was it. Was I in a relationship with Kyle? Was that how things like this went? I mean, we’d been on two legitimate dates and I hadn’t fucked anyone, including Spencer, all week. And I liked him more than I liked most people. I had broken it off with David and had let him pay for my meal today. If this wasn’t dating, I didn’t know what was. And I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I mean, this whole thing was supposed to be an experiment, not a quest to find a life partner. Could I sustain a relationship with a guy? Did I even want to?

At coffee in the student center downstairs, almost as if he’d read my mind, Kyle said, “This doesn’t have to become a thing, you know. If you don’t want it to.”

“I was just thinking that,” I told him.

“I mean, I know you’re pretty new to this. I’m sure you have wild oats you want to be sewing.”

“Wild oats?” I asked laughing at him. “Who says wild oats anymore?”

“You know what I mean,” Kyle said smiling but trying to keep it serious. “If you want to keep seeing people, I’m totally fine with that.” Then he did something I wasn’t expecting. Right there in the student center in front of everyone and anyone to see, he took his thumb and ran it across my upper lip. “You have foam.” He smiled.

I was almost sold. Of course I liked Kyle, a lot, it felt like right then, but what kind of guy turns down the chance to have his cake and eat it too? I decided I’d use the upcoming weekend as a barometer. If I honestly could go out and feel nothing for anyone else, then I’d know it was meant to be with Kyle and I’d bring up the possibility of a relationship. I didn’t want to get in a relationship with him this early in the year and this early in my experiment with guys, only to be tempted later on and wind up hurting him. That would suck for both of us.

Talking to Spencer about it later that night, he agreed with me.

“I mean, I think it’s cool that he’s willing to keep it open,” Spencer told me when we were about to go to sleep. He was totally cool holding off on having sex for a while. I was pretty sure he was sticking it to at least one of his teammates, anyway. “You don’t want to jump into this thing prematurely and then break it off. Take things slow with Kyle and see how you feel after this weekend, maybe.”

I opted to stay in on Friday night. I had a paper due Monday morning and I really wanted to get started on it. Kyle called me late Friday from what I could hear in the background was a small party.

“You’re coming to hang out with me and some Sigma’s,” he said, clearly already a little drunk. “No is not an option. A pledge is on the way to pick you up.”

“I’m in the middle of a paper,” I said in a lame attempt at protest.

“Didn’t I just say no is not an option? Put some pants over that big dick of yours and go downstairs,” he said. Correction: he was already a lot drunk.

“Kyle,” I said, trying to protest one more time.

“You’ve been requested by name, buddy,” he said. At that point, I was slightly curious. Requested by name? Who the fuck had requested me? The only Sigma I even remotely knew was… Rusty. And he was the only guy in the world that called me buddy. It had to be him who requested me by name. I suddenly got the urge to go.

I told Kyle okay, got up, and slipped on some decent clothes. I figured this wouldn’t be a rager on the same level as last weekend, so I should look like I tried. I took a couple of pulls from the vodka Spencer and I had in our fridge and then raced downstairs

Just like Kyle had said, a car was sitting outside my dorm with its hazards on. I recognized the pledge in the driver’s seat as the same guy in blue shorts and blue bowtie. This time he was wearing blue jeans, a blue shirt and a blue cap. He explained on the drive over to the Sigma house that he was blue pledge. They each had a color and they had to wear it from head to toe every day. Even their pledge pack had to be that color. I felt sorry for orange.

When I got to the house, I noticed Kyle was in one corner talking to a girl. The whole place was the exact opposite of what it had been a week ago. It was pretty clean. Furniture was placed sparsely but nicely around the common rooms. There were a handful of brothers hanging out, some playing flip cup in the kitchen, but most talking to the many girls that were loitering about. If Kyle brought me over here to rescue him from a girl, I’d kill him.

I was immediately pulled into the kitchen by Rusty.

“Commando’s on my team,” he said. Evidently, Kyle had told them the nickname I was picking up around the freshman class. The rest of the team chanted Commando, Commando as we set up for another round. I told Rusty I should probably go check in with Kyle since he’s the one that called me over.

“Little Wriggs is a little occupied,” Rusty said really close to my face. Apparently the girl he was talking to in the corner had the hots for him. “Looks like he’s gonna get his dick wet tonight.”

Thinking it was inappropriate to cock-block Kyle in front of all these Greek campus Gods, I decided to join the game of flip cup and just have a good time. I also thought it wasn’t appropriate to get jealous at all. Kyle had given me the go ahead to keep my options open; obviously, he was interested in doing the same.

I played back-to-back-to-back games of survivor flip cup. I was actually pretty good and every time my team had to vote someone out, I somehow kept making the cut. All three games, it was Rusty and me defending our team at the end. Every once in a while, Rusty would pat me on the back and linger there a second longer than normal. Kyle’s words that he might be crushing on me kept going through my mind.

After getting my fill of beer, Rusty asked if I wanted to go upstairs with him and do some shots. “You look a little too sober, Commando,” he slurred. I followed him up.

The room he took me to upstairs was small but decorated really nicely. There was a bed in the middle of one wall, a television on the other. There was a desk with a stereo in one corner and a KA rug in the middle of the room.

“Is this your room?” I asked him as he went into a small fridge and pulled out a bottle of Maker’s Mark.

“God no, I’d never live in the Sigma house,” he said. I couldn’t tell how drunk he was at that point, but he was pouring two shots, so I assumed he was down to get drunker. “I live at RLD,” he said. I guessed that I was supposed to know what that meant. “The Red Light District. It’s a house west of campus. You should come over sometime. It’s pretty sweet. And we entertain all the time.”

“Well you aren’t entertaining now,” I said, taking the shot glass from him.

“Aren’t I?” he asked, giving me a wink. I was sure, right then and there, that Kyle had been right. “To entertainment.”

I took the shot, choked a little on it, braved my face and swallowed. Wow, I thought. I handed him the glass and he poured another. While he was waiting for me to recover, he walked over and turned on some music. Ten minutes and three shots later, I was definitely feeling the effects of the beer and the Maker’s.

“Are we going to rejoin the party?” I asked him, sitting down on the bed to ease off my dizziness.

“I’m in no hurry if you aren’t,” he said. He sat down next to me and put his hand on my thigh. If I wasn’t sure before, I totally was now. This frat star was trying to get me to hook up with him. He could have saved his Maker’s Mark; I totally would have anyway. Rusty was fucking hot. He was definitely a bigger, more muscular looking guy— sort of reminded me of a country version of AC Slater. His hair was long and swooped to the side. He kept his beard grown in a five o’clock shadow. Showing him that I could take his hint, I leaned over and kissed him. A second later, he’d pulled me down to the bed next to him and we were making out.

If I thought that David and Spencer liked taking control, it was nothing like Rusty. From the get go, he had me in his palm. He took my shirt off for me in one fluid motion, pulled me up so that I was sitting on the bed and he was standing in front of me. I watched him take his own shirt off, revealing a lightly hairy, extremely bulky chest. This was my manliest lay to date.

Suddenly, sitting there watching him undress, I felt extremely guilty. Kyle had called me over here and he was stuck downstairs talking to some girl he didn’t like. I reached into my pocket, avoided grazing my boner and pulled out my phone.

“I gotta send this really quick,” I said. Rusty said no worries and walked over to the fridge to take another shot. I typed “Where are you?” to Kyle. Almost immediately he responded with “Cab back to campus with Jamie.” Evidently that girl had been Kyle’s lady friend. My guilt began to ease. A second later he sent another text. “Rusty wants you. He told me. Have fun. :P”

“Ready, little buddy?” Rusty asked, walking back over to the bed. I looked at Kyle’s last message, smiled, put my phone away and proceeded to extract Rusty’s specimen while he stood there in front of me.

As far as giving blow jobs is concerned, I wouldn’t say I’m the best there is. I mean, I’d only been doing it for about a month at that point and even now I’d much rather get head than give it. But Rusty was standing there with a 7 inch cut pecker that was begging to be sucked and as soon as I put my lips on it, I could tell he was enjoying it. He took hold of my shoulders, moaned, “Oh yeah,” over and over and let me go to work.

I tried my best to vary my technique, but always found myself just bobbing back forth, extracting as much pre-cum as I could with deep pulls from his cock like I was smoking a cigar. For some reason, the saltiness of pre-cum drove me absolutely crazy. It was like I couldn’t get enough once I tasted it. I used one of my hands to trace Rusty’s huge chest and the other to fumble with his balls. Evidently Rusty was a bit of a ball’s guy because as soon as I cupped them, I got another spurt of precum. I squeezed his dick pretty hard and sucked in deep.

“Oh fuck, little buddy,” he said. “I’ve been waiting for this for a while.” I didn’t stop to think how long ‘a while’ was because Rusty was starting to precum more and more, a sign I knew well. He was about to fill my mouth with seed.

He pushed me back, got on the bed himself, straddling me, and shoved his cock into my mouth in one thrust. It was like he was doing a push up on top of me, and my mouth was his dick’s target. Feeling like I could do anything to him right then without protest, I used one hand to pump his dick and with the other, reached two fingers around him and slipped them into his ass. Within a second, Rusty screamed, “fuck, little buddy,” and shot a massive load right down my throat.

“That was amazing,” he told me. I felt proud of myself. I’d managed to get this guy off in t-minus five minutes. “Good call on the reach around,” he winked.

I got dressed, went downstairs, hung out a little bit more and then asked silver pledge to drive me back to campus. I’m sure Rusty thought I was going to stay a little longer and maybe follow him to the Red Light District, but to be honest, after I’d collected his specimen, I wasn’t really into it. I spent the rest of the night thinking about Kyle, wondering if it was okay that I was jealous he was with a girl even though I had just given an “amazing” performance to Rusty. I fought every urge to drunk text him as I got to my dorm, stripped out of my clothes, pulled out the notebook and added Rusty to the list.