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    Aditus
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

A Fool's Thoughts - 7. Solitary

Solitary

The room is crowded and

I can feel your presence here.

Your stillness vibrates through me,

the void a rolling sea.

No sound screams in my ear

Until I hear

a whispered solitary

 

Vast halls echo silence

when I climb those many stairs.

Open doors are mouths gaping

Drapes like monsters shaping

Light through mirrors flares

And its glares

a bright, white solitary.

 

Blind windows show the sky

I can feel the sun’s cold rays.

Sweating I stretch out my hand,

touch the snow-covered land

glistening in jolly grays

and a soft tune plays

a pearling solitary.

Copyright © 2016 aditus; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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When I looked for translations of "solitary" in my (Dutch) dictionary I found more than twenty different meanings. To my surprise most of them were positive ones. I was pleasantly surprised, because I had expected the contrary, and could only then explain why your poem felt so positive to me.
To me it feels like a self chosen and benign state of being alone, where there's no need to share (hope that makes sense).
I liked the entire poem, but open doors as gaping mouths is my favorite picture here.
Thanks, Adi, for another great poem.

On 01/16/2016 11:12 PM, J.HunterDunn said:

When I looked for translations of "solitary" in my (Dutch) dictionary I found more than twenty different meanings. To my surprise most of them were positive ones. I was pleasantly surprised, because I had expected the contrary, and could only then explain why your poem felt so positive to me.

To me it feels like a self chosen and benign state of being alone, where there's no need to share (hope that makes sense).

I liked the entire poem, but open doors as gaping mouths is my favorite picture here.

Thanks, Adi, for another great poem.

'When I looked for translations of "solitary" in my (Dutch) dictionary I found more than twenty different meanings.' I love that you're doing such things. :) Solitary for me is ambiguous. Sometimes it's self chosen, or at least you think so, but maybe you wouldn't mind some special company also.

I'm happy it felt positive to you. Thank you, Peter.

On 01/17/2016 03:09 AM, Mikiesboy said:

Contentedly alone .. this is how this made me feel . I like being alone sometimes, with no one but the dog about ... there's a peacefulness about it and you're poem reminded me of that feeling.

thank you

tim

As long as there is a dog you might be alone, but not lonely. I'm glad the poem reminded you of a good thing.

Thank you for reading and reviewing, Tim. :)

On 01/17/2016 07:27 AM, AC Benus said:

I don't know…for me this poem walks a tightrope. Overall, there seems to be a desire to 'be ok' with the absence of the beloved, but word choices like 'scream,' 'monsters,' and 'sweating' leave me feeling uneasy.

 

I think this poem is accomplished, but meant to be a challenge as well. Great job.

You might be on to something... It's Pup's roses becoming daffodils maybe. 'walks a tightrope' 'A challenge'...yeah.

Thank you, AC. :)

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