The Tribuo - 57. Part V, chapter 11

- XI -

Three weeks later

Jess

If I were writing a book about myself, and if it would start on this particular day, do you know what the first sentence would sound like? I am fucked, that’s what it would sound like. Yeah, that’s right. I am totally fucked. It’s been almost three weeks since Jamie’s birthday party; since that damn night, when Paul-fucking-Landley gave me his 'Chinese herb' cigarette. Chinese herb my ass! Goddamn that bastard! He finally came clean with me ten days ago, after I almost cracked his head open with the frying pan. I was in another one of my 'Redrum' moods, and by then, I could clearly see the connection between my crazy mood swings and that damn 'Chinese herb.' Every time I'd stop taking that shit for longer than twenty-four hours, I would turn into some crazy bitch from hell.

So that evening, ten days ago, I stormed into his place, shoved him into the wall, and promised to kill him right there on the spot with the bloody frying pan if he didn’t tell me what the hell he’s been giving me. Finally, he told me. No, Jess, he said. It wasn’t a Chinese herb, he said. It has nothing to do with China, he said. I only told you that, so you didn't freak out, he said. You’ve been doing fucking crystal meth for the past two weeks, he said. I almost killed him right then and there.

Instead, I threw that frying pan into his kitchen window, breaking the glass into a gazillion of little pieces, and then I went home. As soon as I got there, I went online and looked up crystal meth. What I found made me want to murder Landley once again. You gotta be kidding me… I don’t know how I managed to keep myself cool enough just so I didn't break my computer. Then, I think I cried. Then I was so pissed off that I broke at least seven plates in the kitchen. Plates weren’t enough, so I also wasted the coffeemaker. Then I cried again. Then I decided to go to sleep. When I fell into my bed, it was eight in the evening. When I finally woke up (just because I had to pee like no other), the clock read 7:30, and my room was mighty dark.

After I got out of the bathroom, I turned on the TV, and that was when I realized that it was 7:30 in the evening. The following evening, that is. I slept for almost twenty-four hours straight, and I still felt like crap. I didn’t miss school only because it was Saturday night. I had an enormous amount of projects due next week, but I couldn’t even get off the couch, let alone do something. Finally, I pulled myself together and headed over to Landley’s place.

He opened the door and smiled, like seeing me was the greatest thing in the world. Son of a bitch was high again, I realized, and the thought made me so jealous and almost hungry, that I started to shake. He was babbling something, but I just told him to shut up and get into his room.

“I am cleaning,” he said and slightly frowned. “I gotta finish it... I am in the middle of very major cleaning!”

“Shut up,” I said through my clenched teeth and shoved him into his room.

I knew that I was digging my own grave right now, but I couldn’t quit the damn thing right before the end of the semester. I would flunk everything. I decided that if I'd just stick with this crap until the finals were over, then I could do some very serious detox during Christmas break. It’s almost a month, that’s more than enough time.

“Give me some of that shit,” I demanded. “I have a ton of projects I have to do!”

“Okay,” he said lightly and fished out the familiar light bulb. “Hey, I will need to buy more of this, but the guy who sold me everything…”

“They are called dealers, Landley,” I said tiredly.

“Whatever,” he laughed like I just said something hilarious. “Anyway, he died or something…”

“Huh?” I stared at him.

He shrugged.

“Or maybe he’s in jail, I don’t know… Anyway, now I have a different guy… Dealer,” he grinned. “He is an all right guy; I mean, stuff he sells is actually better than I used to buy. And when I say better, I mean…”

“Jesus Christ!” I exploded. “Will you just shut up!!”

“All right, all right,” he muttered and handed me the light bulb. “Here, breathe in, breathe out. It’ll help.”

By now I knew how to hold the damn light bulb correctly. I inhaled sharply while he kept babbling.

“Anyway, the point of my story was… Yeah, I did have a point, believe it or not…”

My mood was better. Not great, but better. Another quick inhale.

“He charges more,” Paul kept saying. “I don’t really mind that, since his stuff is better as I said, but…” he took a quick hit himself. “Since you are using it along with me, I’ll need some cash. Fifty-fifty.”

“Fifty-fifty my ass,” I muttered and took the bulb from him. Inhale. One-two-three. Exhale. “You are using a hell of a lot more than me.” Inhale. “I’ll agree to twenty five-seventy five.” One-two-three.

“Thirty five-sixty five,” he said.

Exhale.

“Thirty-seventy.”

“Thirty five-sixty five,” he repeated. “Jess, seriously… That shit is spendy, and I am running out of money as is.”

“Fine,” I grumbled.

Inhale.

To be honest, it sounded fair enough.

One-two-three.

I mean, I have been using a hell of a lot more of this crap than three weeks ago.

Exhale.

I will just stop wasting money on something else. Like soda, for example. I don’t need soda. Or coffee. Especially now that the coffeemaker is dead. Or food. Well… I guess I still have to eat, but I’ve noticed that I didn’t get hungry anymore, unless I didn’t get my usual hit. I can survive on noodles until Christmas, can’t I? Sure! Plus, losing some weight never hurt anyone. Not that I was chunky or anything, but if I lost ten or so pounds, I wouldn't be upset. On the contrary.

“Help me clean,” Paul said and I shook my head.

“You are on your own,” I said quickly. “I need to get on my projects. And if I get into cleaning now, I won’t leave until tomorrow morning.”

It was true. Whenever I had some of 'Dr. Paul’s special,' everything looked incredibly interesting. Cleaning, typing, doing laundry, shopping -- anything. It was amazing.

“Projects,” he grimaced. “I have a project for you…”

And then he was pulling off my sweater. Oh, man… Sex was not just good when you had a hit. It was… I don’t even know how to describe it. I mean, take your usual horny experience and multiply it by, let’s say, seventy-five… That should give you an idea. And whenever Landley was high, he could last forever. Sometimes I wondered how long he could last when he wasn’t high, but I never tested that theory.

I could say no to cleaning, but I couldn’t say no to fucking his brains out. I decided that I’d just get a couple more hits before I left. I should be fine with the projects. I’m not gonna waste any time on sleeping or eating, and I’ll be like an Energizer Bunny once I get in front of my computer. I’ll be done with at least three out of my five projects tomorrow.

Today was Tuesday, a week before Thanksgiving. I felt good. Even the fact that Landley called me last night, and told me that he needed seventy bucks (my share) for another eightball, didn’t spoil my mood. It’s been ten days after he told me about his new dealer, and he was right -- the new guy’s stuff was better. I thought about the fact that I had to make a car payment pretty soon, but then just shrugged it off. I’ll figure it out. Seventy bucks is not such big of a deal. Of course, I knew that the eightball that used to last us for a week, would now only last for three days, but I didn’t care.

I got home, full of energy, great spirit, and awesome mood. Russell was home, talking on the phone. At first, I thought he was talking to Lex. Apparently, Lex decided to ignore all the warning signs and common sense, because he and Russell would hang out pretty much all the time now. He never stayed overnight though, and Russell would spend nights at home as well. I guess they made some weird no-sex pact or something. I couldn’t understand how it made any sense. I mean, hello! They’ve already slept together!

At first, I tried asking Lex about the whole ordeal, but he would avoid the topic as if it was something marked “Top Secret,” so I stopped pestering him. Plus, to be honest, I didn’t really care. If he thinks he’s doing the right thing (which he wasn’t) then let him. Eventually, it’ll blow up in his face, he’ll come crying to me, and that’ll be it. He might as well sleep with the guy. I mean, it’s obvious that it’s gonna end badly (well, obvious to me), so he might just get some decent sex out of it, right? Especially, if Russell was really such a good lay. Oh well, it doesn’t matter.

Anyway, soon enough I figured that he wasn’t talking to Lex. He was talking to someone else, and he looked so excited as if he just found out that he won a million bucks.

“So I’ll see you in a couple of hours,” he said finally. “You got the directions, right? Okay, good. Yeah, I can’t wait to see you too! Bye.”

Huh, I thought. Did he make up with his boyfriend and the guy was coming here? Well, tough shit for Lex, but I warned him. Did he listen to me? Hell, no!

“Someone is coming over?” I asked, and he grinned.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “My friend is bringing my car. Finally!”

Oh, that’s right. I forgot all about it.

“Right on,” I nodded. “I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

“Projects?” he looked at me with a funny expression in his eyes.

“Yeah,” I said. “Why?”

“No reason,” he shrugged. “Have fun.”

“You know it!” I nodded energetically and went away.

A couple of hours later, someone rang the doorbell.

“Jess!” Russell yelled. “Can you please get that? I’ll be right there!”

“Sure!” I yelled back and went to the door.

It was some girl. She was dark-haired, tall, and looked like she was beyond tired.

“Hi,” she smiled. “Is Russell here? Or did I mess up the directions?”

“He’s here,” I said and glanced behind her shoulder. Sure enough, there was a Thunderbird parked on the curb, and it looked like it was screaming, “Wash me!!”

“Oh, good,” she said with great relief. “I managed to get lost several times…! I am Dana,” and she stretched her hand.

“Jess,” I smiled and shook her palm.

“Hey!” I heard Russell’s voice. “God, it’s good to see you!”

“Whatever,” she snorted. “You are glad to see your car!”

“Well, that too,” he laughed. “Come in!”

“I’ll be in my room, you guys,” I said. “All those papers are not going to type themselves, you know! Was nice meeting you, Dana!”

“Nice meeting you too,” she smiled.

I went back into my room, thinking that this girl looked vaguely familiar. I couldn’t figure out why though. Finally, I shrugged it off and threw myself into the chair in front of the computer once again.