System of a Wolf - 1. Chapter 1

Erith stared at the bags of food with a quiet frown. He was never quite sure which to buy; these were for actual dogs, not werewolves. But he had to give Gara something to do during the full moon, or risk coming back to a destroyed apartment. Antlers were a good choice, but they always left him feeling empty after the moon.

“Wild Streak. It’s healthier in general.”

The elf jumped almost guiltily, whirling around to find an aging human behind him. Long silvery hair was tied back to show a sagging face, one Erith recognized in an instant.

“Doctor Marin! I didn’t realize you came here!” he exclaimed, embracing the man carefully.

“No, you were too busy deciding the best tasting kibble,” the human smirked.

“I can’t help it; I get an aftertaste of whatever Gara eats,” Erith frowned. “Is Blake with you? I haven’t seen him in over a year.”

“On the fish aisle. He always likes to watch them swimming around,” Marin chuckled fondly. “I’ve been trying to get him out more, now that he’s nearly nineteen. Maybe you can help with that.”

“I can certainly try. Maybe take him for a hike on Wolfbane; he used to love running that with Devyn,” the elf smiled. “I’ll talk to you in a bit then.”

Hoisting a bag of dog food onto his shoulder, Erith headed toward the fish section of the pet store. Turning down an aisle, he smiled at the sight of a tall, lanky human.

Blake was bent over as he peered at the clear tank inches in front of his face, taking in the multicoloured fish within. Around and around they swam, his eyes tracking them in silent entertainment. Black hair curled around his ears, a skin tanned from hours in the sun peeking out from cheerful coloured clothes. A pair of blue earphones covered his ears, but Erith knew from experience that there probably wasn’t any music playing; they were just a way to muffle the world around the man. The cord might not even be plugged into anything.

He looked as thin as ever, though Erith knew he had to be getting plenty of food every day, especially since he’d been living with Dr. Marin for the last eight years. Erith wasn’t exactly sure why he was still with Dr. Marin, but it wasn’t really his place to question that.

As though he could feel the eyes on him, Blake spun around, planting his back to the tanks warily. His eyes widened at the sight of Erith, and suddenly a body was flying toward the elf.

“Erith!”

Erith caught the man, spinning slightly from the momentum as he embraced his old friend.

“Hey Puppy,” he smiled into Blake’s neck, the man giggling quietly.

“Erith, I’m an adult now…”

“So you are,” the elf smirked, pulling out of the deathlike embrace. “Does that mean you’ve grown out of head pats?”

“Never,” Blake said firmly, and Erith rewarded him with a small rub on his head.

The human’s eyelids fell slightly, a small huff escaping him as he cocked his head to offer the best spot for the elf’s hand.

“Did you talk to Dr. Marin?” Blake asked.

“Oh yeah. He suggested running Wolfbane together,” Erith chuckled, his hand falling back to his side.

Blake glanced at the hand almost sorrowfully before lifting his head to meet Erith’s gaze.

“Really? I mean… I haven’t run the hill in months. I don’t know if I can run it.”

“Me neither,” Erith admitted. “But I bet we could sneak onto campus tomorrow night and run it under the full moon. It would be easy.”

“I think Dr. Marin refers to people like you as bad influences,” Blake smirked. “Wouldn’t that mean you have to spend the night?”

The man’s hand suddenly flew out to the side, a tremor down his entire arm, and Erith let out a small chuckle.

“As if,” he shuddered. “I know you’re excited by the thought, but you won’t catch me anywhere near the pack house.”

Even just the thought disturbed him. He’d been out of therapy for nearly three years now, and yet he still had issues around other wolves. Dr. Marin and Blake were one thing, and Devyn, but most werewolves creeped him out.

“What about this? You stay over at my place for the night, and we can go for a nice run in our wolf forms before tomorrow’s moon?” he suggested.

Blake’s face fell slightly, the man glancing toward the aisle where Dr. Marin was still picking over various wolf foods.

“I… I have to ask Dr. Marin, but I’d like that,” he said quietly.

“Are you okay Puppy?” Erith frowned.

“Oh, yeah. I just… haven’t actually spent the night at anyone else’s house before,” the man admitted.

“Oh, then I’ll make sure your first time… is… special…”

Erith shivered at his own words, glancing down at his feet uncertainly.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come out like it did.”

“No, it’s okay,” Blake gulped. “I’ll… I’ll go talk to Dr. Marin. He might want me at the pack house for the full moon.”

He hurried away from the elf, Erith frowning as the werewolf skidded around the corner. A moment later, Blake peeked around the corner of the aisle again.

“I’m sorry, that was rude, wasn’t it? Do… do you want to come with me?”

“Um, yeah, sure,” Erith smiled slightly, bending over to grab his food.

He followed Blake through the store until they were standing in front of Dr. Marin. The older human was trying to lift his own bag of kibble, and Erith stepped toward him quickly.

“Here, let me get that. I’ve spent months lifting soil; kibble shouldn’t be that much harder,” he said.

“Oh, thank you Erith,” Dr. Marin sighed in relief.

“Dr. Marin… is it okay if I spend the full moon with Erith?” Blake asked suddenly.

The older werewolf smiled suddenly.

“Blake, I’m proud of you,” he beamed. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask for years.”

“You… you have?”

Blake stared at his foster father in shock, Erith chuckling quietly.

“I mean, we did hang out quite a bit at Quarian Academy,” the elf smirked. “I always enjoyed staying over.”

It wasn’t necessarily untrue; Erith enjoyed the time he had spent with Blake when they were teens. The issue was being in the pack complex, surrounded by all the werewolves.

“As long as you’re both okay with it, I have no problem,” Marin smiled. “But we should go back to my house together. I want to make sure you have everything you need first.”

“Oh yeah, like my… uh… my things,” Blake blushed, glancing nervously at Erith.

Erith shrugged slightly, not sure exactly what the human meant. Blake had always used a weighted blanket when Erith had stayed with him before, but why he would be nervous about that now was beyond the elf.

“Well, let’s get these bags into the car and we’ll head out to the pack house,” Marin smiled. “Are you sure you got the bag, Erith? I could carry it; I’m not helpless.”

“Nah, it’s fine where it is,” Erith chuckled. “Come on old man, let me help you out here.”

He wasn’t exactly sure why Marin was buying a bag of kibble himself. Unless…

“Wait, do you eat-?”

“There’s a reason I suggested Wild Streak. Healthy, soaks well in water, and surprisingly tasty,” Marin smirked. “It’s hard to care for an aging wolf. Of course, I could always leave out a plate of cubed meat, but I’ve grown to enjoy the taste.”

Erith shook his head in wonder. Who knew eating kibble as a wolf was that common? Maybe he should have paid more attention in class.

It didn’t take long to pay for the food, and Erith carried one of the bags to Marin’s car with the others.

“I’ll go ahead and follow you to the pack house. Assuming they’ll let a stray like me in,” he chuckled.

“Of course they will,” Blake laughed. “I’ll make sure they let you in.”

“He doesn’t know.”

It wasn’t a question. Blake shivered as he shook his head anyway.

“How am I supposed to tell him? I know you say it’s not a bad thing, but it’s still embarrassing,” he frowned.

Marin sighed quietly as they left the car park. Behind them, Erith’s car followed close. Blake turned his head to see the elf sitting in the car.

“You have to either tell him, or accept that you can’t let yourself regress while you’re there. It wouldn’t be safe for either of you,” Marin said.

“I’m scared…”

He knew it was okay to be scared. Marin would never mock him for his fears. They were valid; he could have emotions that were negative.

“I don’t understand this. I feel… weird around him.”

“Weird? How so?” Marin asked carefully.

“Like… he makes me feel happy, and safe. But it’s not a mate thing, or I don’t think it is. I can’t mate anyone,” the man frowned, staring at his lap.

“You say you can’t. I respect that, but I also believe it is untrue. You know you don’t have to be sexual with your mate, right?”

Blake frowned at the doctor, shaking his head.

“Why would I do that to someone? I can’t just… claim someone as my mate and then never touch them.”

“Yes. You can,” Marin denied. “It all comes down to communication. And that’s why this is so important Blake. You need to decide what you are going to do about-”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. I just want to spend the night with a friend. Why do I have to deal with all this crap?” the man pouted, his arms crossing as he stared out the window.

“Watch your language young man,” Marin scolded.

Blake glared through the window. Buildings were passing by, each passing moment a moment lost before he had to come clean to Erith. Before he lost a friend he had only just regained. It only served to depress him.

“Would you like me to be there for support?” Marin asked.

The man nodded silently, pulling a copper coin from his pocket. The metal wobbled briefly before rising slowly above his hand, and Marin sighed quietly.

“You know I don’t like you doing that,” the older man said.

“Yeah…” Blake muttered, closing his hand around the metal. “But it makes me feel more in control.”

“You are in control Blake. If you decide you don’t want to do this, all you have to do is say the word. We’ll apologise to Erith, and maybe we can go out to dinner together.”

Blake shook his head silently. He didn’t want to push the elf away. He really did feel safe around him, around another werewolf he knew would never force him to do something he didn’t want.

“I’ll invite him inside, and we can all sit down for a soothing cup of tea. And you can explain your situation to him,” Marin said gently as they neared the pack house. “It’s his decision whether he is okay with it or not.”

“But what if he isn’t?”

The older man sighed quietly.

“Blake, would you really want to hide something this important to you from your friend?”

Blake sighed, looking out at Erith’s car again.

“No,” he admitted. “It’s why I stopped seeing him at home. I hated hiding it from him.”

“Then shouldn’t you tell him so you can avoid a repeat of that? I don’t think he’d be that upset. We all handle trauma in different ways.”

“I know,” Blake muttered as the car came to a stop.

“I’ll get him warmed up for you, and then one big jump,” Marin smiled.

He patted Blake’s leg and slipped out of the car, groaning slightly as he stood up. Blake sighed quietly, before following him. Grabbing the kibble from the back seat, the mage lifted it with a brief struggle, trying to set it on his shoulder as Erith had. Suddenly the bag was gone, stolen away by the elf’s hands.

“It sounds like Marin wants to give me ‘the talk’ before we get going,” Erith smirked at the man. “You want to make sure I haven’t forgotten my way around this place?”

“Uh… yeah, sure,” Blake stammered, leading the elf after Marin.

They certainly had a lot to talk about.