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Between Two Mountains - 5. Chapter 5

Cosmo was happy.

Well, Vincenzo’s rejection still festered like an open wound, Pietro was on his case about his stupid job, and now even Marco was criticising his choice of friends, but apart from that he was fucking ecstatic.

It seemed like Marco had even started telling tales about him. Last night, Luca had mocked him mercilessly about his ‘true love’ from Salerno. He would have liked to bring the little squirt down a peg or two, but he had been too stoned to string a suitable put-down together, so Luca had got the last word. And, when Cosmo had lurched slowly to consciousness this morning, his brother had already gone out for the day.

The previous day’s antics had left him with a splitting headache. And, to make matters worse, Luisa and Mario had ambushed him when he finally appeared for a late breakfast.

Buongiorno, son,” Mario had said with an anxious smile, thrusting a freshly made cappuccino into Cosmo’s unsuspecting hands. “Come and join us for a while.”

Lacking an excuse to rush away, Cosmo had sat down with his foster parents at the dining table. Luisa pushed a plate towards him on which she had placed a small fork and a generous slice of sweet, light breakfast sponge cake which she had dusted carefully with icing sugar and cocoa powder. It smelled too good to resist. Reluctantly, Cosmo picked up the fork and began to eat, his gaze flicking warily from parent to parent.

“Cosmo, caro,” Luisa began, clutching her hands fretfully above her bosom. “Is everything all right? These last few days… we’ve been worried about you.”

“I’m fine,” Cosmo grunted. “Guy I liked turned me down, that’s all.”

Luisa sighed. “Oh, Cosmo… I’m sorry.”

“I’m sure that’s been very hard for you,” Mario said. “But, the thing is, we’ve noticed changes in your behaviour… things we can’t ignore. You’re less civil, you’re never here for meals, and then when you do come home…” He tailed off, looking uncomfortable. Cosmo glared at him.

What? I stink of weed? Just SAY it…!

“Who’ve you been associating with, Cosmo?” Luisa pressed him. “These friends you say you’ve been spending time with… where have they come from?”

“Why don’t you just ask Luca?” Cosmo snapped; Luisa recoiled slightly in shock. “Your golden boy seems to know all about it already.”

Golden boy?” Mario protested. “Cosmo, we care for you both –”

“Oh, please!” Cosmo interrupted. “Don’t tell me you love us both equally. I mean, why would you? Luca’s your adopted son, your great hope for the Verdi family’s future. I’m just the washout… the temporary house guest you got stuck with.”

“Son, that’s a very distorted view –” Mario began firmly, but Cosmo had heard enough.

“I think I’m done here,” he said, pushing his half-eaten breakfast back towards Luisa and downing the remains of his coffee. “I’m going back out to see my friends… the ones I can trust, I mean.”

“I’m sure Marco was just concerned for you,” Luisa said anxiously, but Cosmo had already turned away.

Yeah, everyone’s so CONCERNED. I’m not a human being with real FEELINGS you might try to understand… I’m just a problem to be solved.

Slamming the door behind him, he had left without another word.

Now, he was relaxing back under the pine tree at the Neri compound, enjoying one more joint with Elisabetta. She had told him it would have to be their last one for a while: her stock was running low, and she had yet to identify another supplier.

“Why does everybody round here have to be so damned well-behaved?” she had grumbled.

For the moment, Cosmo wasn’t too worried: the fix had taken his headache away for the moment, and he was feeling too chilled out to dwell too much on what came later.

“The sky is blue,” he said, lolling back in his chair and staring up into the heavens, taking another toke from his joint.

Elisabetta snickered. “That’s a profound and penetrating observation, my friend.”

I feel blue sometimes.”

“I hear ya. There are two main colours in this shitty world. Black and blue.”

Cosmo chortled. “You’re so dark, Betta.”

“You know what I find makes the clouds part just a little?” Elisabetta asked.

Cosmo glanced across at his companion. She was watching him with a playful and inscrutable little smile about her thin, dark lips. Today she was wearing a revealing black crop top; just above her right breast was a tiny tattoo in the shape of a cross, which didn’t quite conceal the small, round scar beneath it. It looked like a cigarette burn.

“I dunno,” Cosmo replied. “What does?”

Elisabetta smirked. “Sex.”

Cosmo drew a mouthful of smoke in a bit too hard and, for a few moments, was overcome by a coughing fit. He was dimly aware of the older girl laughing throatily at his reaction. Running his free hand up into his greasy hair, he held his head down until he’d regained the ability to breathe.

“Totally,” he replied once he’d recovered a little. “That definitely helps.”

“Oh!” she chuckled. “You’re an expert, are you?”

Cosmo glared at her. “I can hold my own.”

Elisabetta let out another gale of laughter. “I’ll bet you can,” she replied. “But I don’t think that qualifies, boyfriend.”

Cosmo flushed. “That’s not what I…”

But Elisabetta shook her head. “Why don’t you just admit it, Cos? You are such a virgin!” She placed her hands together and cast her eyes skywards in a cruel imitation of prayer. “Pure and unsullied, just as God made you.”

“I am not!” Cosmo blustered. “I…”

But he faltered. He couldn’t answer her challenge without telling her about Massimo. And, anyway, how far did you have to go with another boy before you ceased to be a virgin? Suddenly, he wasn’t sure their handheld efforts had qualified.

He frowned, confused. He seemed to have fallen into a strange grey area he didn’t even know existed.

Jesus, even my virginity status sucks! …or doesn’t, which is sort of the problem, I guess.

“Cat got your tongue?” Elisabetta teased, a little more gently.

“It’s the weed,” Cosmo protested feebly. “Fogged my brain.”

Elisabetta let that one go. “You know, there must be somebody in this crappy little town who’d do it with you,” she said reflectively. “How about your little groupie, Marco? Or…” she snickered. “You could probably ask Giorgio. I’m pretty sure he’d be willing. The kid’s seriously fixated on you.”

Inwardly, Cosmo’s heart had suddenly quickened to an uneasy gallop.

Does she KNOW…?

He affected a scowl. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said defensively.

Relax, Cos!” Elisabetta said, with a roll of her eyes and a shake of her head. “I’m just messing with you. Have another toke.”

Cosmo did, and felt a fresh wave of relaxation. He realised his joint was burning low; it didn’t look like there were that many breaths left.

In his pocket, his phone began to vibrate. He fished it out.

‘Pietro Rossi,’ it said on the screen.

Something Marco had said yesterday impinged on his brain and, for once, he tapped the green button instead of the red one.

Pronto,” he said, trying his best to inject a bit of life into his voice so it wouldn’t sound like he was stoned out of his mind.

“Cosmo?” Pietro’s voice sounded edgy, laced with carefully contained frustration. “I’m glad I finally caught you. Where’ve you been?”

“I’m… ah… sorry,” Cosmo mumbled. “I’ve, ah…”

Come on, brain… WORK!

“I’ve not been feeling great,” he concluded lamely.

“Really?” Pietro’s tone was unimpressed. “Because I have it on good authority that you spent yesterday hanging out with friends.”

Fucking Marco…

“Yeah, I know,” Cosmo floundered, “but…”

“You’ve missed three days’ work without a word!” Pietro exclaimed. “Fabrizio waited an hour for you this morning. Our supplier in Cetara was sold out by the time he got there. We have no fresh anchovies for our special. Mamma’s having to improvise an alternative, and she’s not happy about it.”

Cosmo froze, suddenly forced to confront an uncomfortable truth.

Shit. Shit shit shit.

He began to wonder whether Luca was right about him. Had he really just been a ‘selfish ass’ about this whole thing?

But I was going through something…

Yeah, Vincenzo said no. Big deal. Pietro’s father-in-law was in fucking hospital, and had he given up?

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled again. “I’ll try to do better.”

“All right, Cosmo.” Pietro’s voice seemed calmer now. “But I need to see you tomorrow, washed and on time. No more excuses.”

There was a quiet ‘click’ as his employer closed the line. Cosmo lowered the phone to his lap, staring at it stupidly.

“He hung up on me,” he said.

There was silence for a moment. Cosmo was taken by surprise; he had expected another caustic remark or joke from Elisabetta. But when gave her a questioning glance, he saw that the humour had temporarily left her eyes. The look in those dark pools now was something altogether harder, more brittle.

“You don’t have to take that crap from him,” she said quietly.

“He’s angry because I’ve been missing work,” Cosmo replied doubtfully. “I don’t think that’s so…”

 

“He’s probably looking for any excuse to get rid of you,” she replied. “If it wasn’t this, it’d be something else.”

Cosmo frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“It’s prejudice,” Elisabetta insisted. “Our parents are criminals, so naturally we must be too. Civilised people like him have no use of the likes of us.” Almost unconsciously, she fiddled with her crop top until the strap obscured the tattoo that might have been a burn mark. “Unless we have something they want.”

“I don’t think Pietro’s like that –” Cosmo protested.

But Elisabetta cut him off with an impatient hiss through her teeth.

“Get real, Cosmo!” she exclaimed, suddenly animated, all flashing eyes and flared-up cheeks. “You’re tarnished goods, like me. You don’t belong. They’re all just waiting for you to show your true colours.”

“But… I don’t have any true colours!” Cosmo replied feebly.

Elisabetta gave a bark of humourless laughter. “D’you think that makes a difference? Round here, it’s not what you do, but where you come from and who you know that matters. It’s all people care about.”

Her sudden burst of manic energy seemed to be spent. Looking at him steadily, she took a deep drag from her joint.

“Sorry Cos,” she went on, “but you and me, we’ll never amount to anything. Best just to accept it.”

Cosmo sagged slightly.

Maybe she’s right. Luca certainly seems to think so. Vincenzo couldn’t ditch me fast enough. And even with Marta, Luisa, Mario… criticism and complaints are never too far away.

“If we’re so worthless, what’s the point?” he asked miserably. “What are we supposed to do?”

Elisabetta gave a dark chuckle. “Whatever we want, I figure.”

Cosmo blinked. “Huh…?”

Elisabetta’s mouth curled into a bitter smile. “If they’ve already written us off as criminals in the making, what’s stopping us? Let’s get out there and have some fun.”

* * *

“Act casual.”

Cosmo leaned against the warm stone wall behind him and tried to act like he wasn’t stalking a potential target.

They were standing in a shady spot at the bottom of the narrow, tree-lined street that led down from the cathedral square, where it met the end of the main valley road and the ramp that led down to the public car park. The sun-drenched terraces of Scala stretched across the far side of the valley while, amongst the spiky green canopies of the pine trees that lined the car park ramp, the cicadas scraped noisily.

Relatively speaking, it was a busy little corner of town: cars came and went from the public car park, passersby walked to and from the square, and a few people were exploring the colourful displays outside the ceramics workshop across the street. The summer season, such as it was ever going to be this year, definitely seemed to be warming up.

A small pickup truck was delivering supplies to a bar nestled in the stone arches of the ruined palazzo that spanned the tree-lined street. Cosmo and Elisabetta had been watching the delivery for some time. Having got as close as he could by road, the driver was taking crates of food and drink up to the restaurant doors one sack truck at a time. Each time he set off up the uneven street with another noisy load, it took him a minute or so to unload and return.

The driver had just set off with several crates of Peroni beer. They chinked rhythmically as he bumped over each slab of the ancient, dusty crazy paving.

“Get ready,” Elisabetta whispered, touching Cosmo briefly on the arm. “I’m going in.”

Cosmo watched with a bemused sort of respect as the older girl sauntered over to the open back of the pickup truck as if she had every right to be there, reached inside and plucked out another crate of beer. She turned back to Cosmo and offered him a triumphant smirk.

Andiamo!” she mouthed.

Snickering, they set off at a brisk walk, attracting barely a glance from the passersby. After a few metres, they broke into a trot, making for the safety of the blind corner below the ancient church at the top of the valley road.

Distantly, they heard the rumble of returning wheels.

“Hey!” cried an angry voice, but they had already whipped around the corner and out of sight with a whoop of guilty joy and relief. Cosmo relieved his friend of her burden, and they dove down a concrete stairway that zig-zagged steeply down into the valley.

“Let’s get out of sight,” Cosmo panted.

The uppermost flight of steps was canted out from the retaining wall at the roadside and, as soon as they had taken the first hairpin corner, they ducked beneath it to conceal themselves from the view of any pursuers. The loose mix of dry dirt and stones skittered under Cosmo’s feet, unleashing little puffs of dust, but he kept his footing.

“You don’t think he could tell who we were?” he whispered.

Elisabetta shook her head; the colour had risen on her cheeks again and she was breathing hard. Cosmo thought she looked truly alive for the first time that morning.

“He saw the back of our heads for, like, a second…?” she whispered back. She glanced up at the roof of their improvised concrete shelter. “And he’ll never find us under here! Nice work, Cos.”

They remained there until they were sure the coast must be clear, then they carried on down the stairway, looking for a suitable spot to enjoy their ill-gotten wares. The crate of beer was getting heavier by the minute, and Cosmo could feel beads of perspiration trickling down the sides of his face from his increasingly lank and sweaty hair.

What would Luca say? Make sure it doesn’t make pale tracks in all the dirt, probably.

But what the fuck did Luca know? He had never spent his life as the family disappointment.

The stairway switched back and forth through impossibly steep olive groves on its way down into the valley. Cosmo supposed it had been an important route up and down the mountain once but, following the construction of the road, it had taken on an air of neglect. The concrete of the stone-tipped stairs was often cracked and broken, leaving loose shards lying around at the sides of the path amidst a sea of fallen olive leaves baked brown by the sun.

It seemed like the litter of leaves and rubble made the landscape all the better for the lizards to skitter through. They were all over the place. They shot off in all directions as Cosmo and Elisabetta approached, with an air of outrage that two mere humans should disturb their peaceful, neglected haven.

Yeah. Run away, guys. Get too close to me and I might just have myself a lizard barbecue. How many of you little fuckers could I fit onto a single kebab skewer?

He snickered quietly to himself. He had never actually hurt an animal in his life, but it amused him to think of the worst thing he could say and imagine Luca’s outraged reaction.

At last, as the stairway merged with another path that strove more directly down the valley from the direction of San Martino and Monte, they found a spot where they could get out of sight. A couple of semi-derelict terraces rose above the path, dotted with a few more silvery olive trees and a tumbledown stone storehouse tucked away in the lee of the cliff.

Cosmo hefted the crate of beer up onto the low retaining wall, setting it down among the dry brown grass with another puff of dust, then knelt and laced his fingers together to offer Elisabetta a leg up.

“My hero,” she remarked ironically, pursing her lips in a playful sort of way.

Cosmo hesitated, his eyes caught for a moment by the short black skirt she was wearing.

“You are wearing something else under there, right?” he said.

Elisabetta smirked. “Are you planning on looking?” she replied coyly.

Cosmo flushed. “Of course not!”

“Then it doesn’t matter, does it?”

Elisabetta had no need for heels. She placed one flat-soled boot in Cosmo’s hands and, fixing his eyes determinedly on the concrete of the path below him, he boosted her up onto the raised ground at the top of the wall. Without hesitation, she turned around and extended a hand to help him follow her.

“There you go,” she said as Cosmo scrambled to his feet and dusted himself down. “Criminals we may be, but we can still take care of each other.”

Reluctantly, Cosmo hefted up the crate of beer one last time. “Let’s go find somewhere we can sit down,” he said. “I hope you’ve got something we can open them with.”

Cosmo could have sworn Elisabetta’s skirt didn’t have­ pockets, but it must have, because a second later she was holding a fancy-looking Swiss Army knife. Its red lacquered finish glinted dully in the sun.

“Always prepared,” she replied.

“That’s a pretty sick piece of kit,” Cosmo said. “Where did you get it?”

Elisabetta shrugged. “Some shop that didn’t need it anymore”, she said blandly. “I forget.”

* * *

The deserted terrace turned out to be the perfect place to pass the time and put the world to rights. As the high sun moved round to the south, it was shaded by the cliff, then by the old store building, and then by the trees themselves.

After his third or fourth warm beer, Cosmo began to lose count and, eventually, all track of time. His brain felt slow and fuzzy, his own movements clumsy and strangely entertaining. The day felt like an endless, soporific eternity, undisturbed apart from the scraping of the cicadas, the buzzing flies and the occasional harsh cackle from Elisabetta. All Cosmo knew was that all the beer was making him want to piss. A lot.

He began to make regular forays to a clump of trees on the far side of the storehouse to relieve himself. As and when she needed to, Elisabetta took herself off to a private spot behind a clump of bushes at the far end of the terrace, but apart from that she seemed remarkably unaffected by the beer. At least from Cosmo’s semi-addled perspective, she seemed every bit as sharp, acerbic and in control as ever.

In the middle of one such visit, he looked up to find Elisabetta standing nearby, watching him with a detached and playful smile. The trickle of warm pee he had been happily producing came to a sudden, embarrassed stop.

“Hey!” he protested, blinking at her owlishly and stuffing himself hastily back into his battered jeans. “What gives?”

“Just having a peek,” she replied playfully. “Seeing what you’ve got under the hood.”

“And…?” Cosmo replied bashfully.

Seriously… am I REALLY asking her to rate my dick?

“Not bad,” Elisabetta remarked casually, “but tragically untouched by female hands.”

Jesus… not THIS again!

Cosmo flushed dully. “I don’t want to be a virgin anymore.”

Elisabetta uttered another harsh bark of laughter.

“Oh, boy! Touched a nerve there, didn’t I?”

She turned and slipped back round the corner of the storehouse to the secluded spot where they’d spent most of the afternoon. Cosmo followed, wondering whether there was opportunity to kill two birds with one stone here. After all, he was supposed to be her boyfriend. Didn’t that come with certain expectations? Could all of her taunts about his virginity have been an invitation in disguise?

Elisabetta was leaning against the warm stone of the cliff, toying idly with an unopened beer, watching him approach with another inscrutable little smile upon her lips.

He had no real idea how to do this; no idea what was acceptable or what wasn’t, or what she would or wouldn’t like… but he didn’t think romance was the key, somehow. Not with this girl. He sat down close to her, looking into her eyes as determinedly as he could, then reached up and laid a hand gently on one of her breasts.

Elisabetta’s eyes widened slightly. “Why, Cosmo,” she whispered teasingly, “I didn’t know you cared!”

Cosmo found he was shaking slightly, not with desire, but nerves and unease.

“Do you want…” he mumbled, but she leaned forward and silenced him with a long kiss on the lips. Caught by surprise, Cosmo closed his eyes just in time.

Hey… this isn’t THAT bad…

When they finally broke apart and Cosmo had cracked his eyes open again, he offered her an awkward smile. Elisabetta twined her hands around his neck, her dark eyes regarding him with a look that was somehow much gentler than usual… a look of sympathy, perhaps… or maybe pity.

“Poor Cosmo,” she said softly. Taking one of his hands, she lowered it down and placed it between his legs. With a sinking feeling, Cosmo was forced to cup his own complete lack of excitement.

“But…” he said weakly.

“I know,” she whispered. “Did you really think I wouldn’t, Cos? I’m not stupid, I know why you ran away from Emanuele and Barbara… and anyway, it comes off you in waves.”

He gave her a sideways, rather bleary-eyed look. At least she hadn’t mentioned Massimo. Maybe she didn’t know everything.

All the same, the sudden and unexpected toppling of one of the biggest secrets between them had already taken its toll. Hot, salty tears had begun to form at the corners of his eyes, and he buried his face in his knees, not wanting her to see them.

One of Elisabetta’s hands clutched gently at his shoulder.

“Don’t be sad, Cos,” he heard her say. “I totally would, if your bread was, you know, really buttered that way.”

“I hate my fucking life!” Cosmo cried raggedly.

“You know what the best solution to that is?” she whispered. “Let’s get really, really drunk!

* * *

After that, the details got fuzzy.

Cosmo remembered snatches. There was laughter, there was wrestling, an ill-fated attempt to climb an olive tree…

A… campfire? It was a wonder they hadn’t burned the whole olive grove down.

Broken bottles. Self-pitying stories and songs. A blast of a horn, raised voices and angry gestures as they stumbled back out onto the road at nightfall, right into the path of a passing Vespa scooter.

He must have said goodnight to Elisabetta at some point, because then he was on his own, first lurching, then crawling on all fours up the steep steps to Monte. Then a pair of strong hands had heaved him to his feet and virtually thrown him through the door to his own courtyard.

“Get in there, you fucking idiot!”

A voice. Had it been… Vincenzo?

He rolled back onto the terracotta floor tiles and stared up into the stars.

“You wanna be my boyfriend, Vincenzo?” he called to the sky. “I’m the best fucking catch in history!”

There was no answer, of course, from the darkened windows of the house next door. Then a cramp seized his stomach, and, in the warm glow of the outside light, he rolled over and threw up copiously on the courtyard floor.

The sudden shock sobered him up a little and he backed away from the mess on all fours, staring at it in disgust.

The front door opened with a clank that seemed very loud in the quiet of the night, and then Luisa and Mario were there in their dressing gowns, looking down at him in horror. Luca stood in the doorway in his pyjamas, his expression stony-faced.

“Jesus Christ,” he muttered, then he stalked off back into the house.

“Cosmo, what on Earth…?” Luisa gasped. “It’s nearly midnight.”

“Sorry…” he mumbled, staggering to his feet with the help of a steadying hand from Mario.

“This has to stop,” Mario said quietly. “I’m sure things have been difficult for you, but… you’re bringing shame on all of us.”

Luisa had disappeared back into the house, but now reappeared with a mop and a slop bucket.

“I should…” Cosmo began, lurching towards her, but Mario held him back.

“I don’t think so, Cosmo,” he said. “You need to go inside and sleep this off.”

Cosmo nodded. “Right. Okay.”

He staggered into the house and made unsteadily for the stairs, but Mario blocked his path.

“I’m sorry, Cosmo,” he said calmly, “but you can’t go down to sleep with your brother in this state. You’ll have to take the sofa.”

Cosmo couldn’t marshal the thought processes to argue. He allowed himself to be led over to the sofa, where Mario propped him up with a spare pillow and threw a rough blanket over him. As an afterthought, Mario deposited a large plastic bowl on the ceramic tiled floor in front of him.

“Just in case,” he said.

Before Luisa had even made it back in from the courtyard, Cosmo had passed out, dead to the world.

* * *

Cosmo awoke an uncertain number of hours into the morning. Only, it wasn’t so much waking up as being dragged, kicking and screaming, into a reluctant state of semi-consciousness.

It was already bright and sunny outside the great picture windows, and there were clattering noises coming from the kitchen area. Everything was too bright, too loud, and Cosmo’s brain felt like somebody was pounding at it with a pneumatic drill.

The room was rife with the scent of freshly roasting coffee, making him feel nauseous.

What the hell happened to me last night…

As he rubbed at his sticky, bleary eyes, he saw that somebody had left a glass of water on the coffee table in front of him. He forced himself into a sitting position; lights danced in front of his eyes for a moment, and for a second he thought he might pass out or throw up again, but then the feeling passed and he took a morose sip from his glass of water.

Buongiorno,” said a cool voice from off to the left.

Cosmo cracked his stiff and painful neck towards the source of the voice and saw Luca sitting at the dining table, already freshened up, dressed and ready to go about his day. In front of him was a small plate containing a single plain croissant.

Luca slid out of his chair and brought the plate over.

“Just when I thought living with you couldn’t get any worse,” Luca said. “You’ve really outdone yourself this time.”

Cosmo took the plate from Luca’s outstretched hand and picked at the croissant listlessly. His stomach roiled in protest, but he thought he probably needed it.

“What time is it?” he asked.

Luca checked his wristwatch. “Quarter past ten,” he replied.

“Shit,” Cosmo mumbled. “Missed work again.”

Luca shook his head. “You really think you’ll have a job after this?” He sighed. “I’m going out. See you later.”

He walked off. Cosmo was reluctant to turn around; he could sense Luisa and Mario circling anxiously behind him, and he wasn’t ready to face them just yet.

There was a buzz from the television stand. Cosmo looked up, blinking in surprise: it was his phone. It looked like somebody had been thoughtful enough to put it on charge for him the night before.

He shuffled over to the phone and was surprised to see a text from Marco.

‘U ok? I heard some things. A few people we know saw you last night.’

Cosmo sighed in frustration and ran a hand through his hair; it came away feeling slick and greasy. Looking at his own palm in distaste, he decided he would get into the shower as soon as he felt able to get up.

Fucking Marco. Fucking small town!

Leaving the text unanswered, he flicked through his contacts and tapped Elisabetta’s number. Placing the phone to his ear, he waited. It rang out several times but went unanswered.

He tried for a text instead.

‘What did we DO yesterday?’ he wrote.

He tapped ‘send’, but the screen gave no indication that the message had even been received, let alone read.

He tossed the phone down in disgust. Had it been anybody else, he might have worried, but Elisabetta had done this before. Even back in Salerno, she had sometimes disappeared off the grid completely, only to reappear a day or two later without any sort of explanation, acting as if nothing unusual had happened. It looked like today was going to be one of those days.

He brooded silently for a few seconds, but then his eyes were drawn back to his phone lying on the sofa cushions next to him. He might still be mad at the kid, but at least there was one friend who still seemed to be interested in talking.

He picked the phone back up and returned to Marco’s message.

‘Yeah, I’m OK. Hung over, that’s all. Overdid it last night.’

Marco’s reply came straight away and was typically economical.

‘No kidding.’

But perhaps the younger boy thought the better of it, because another text followed moments later.

‘Come out with me tonight. Maybe I’ll bring another friend. Let’s hang.’

Cosmo sighed. What else was he going to do with himself?

‘Sure. OK.’

* * *

By the evening, Cosmo was feeling almost human again. Once he had showered and put on some fresh clothes, he was allowed to return to his room, where he had remained for most of the day, staying out of the sun, rehydrating himself and recovering his wits. There had still been no word from Elisabetta.

As the shadows began to lengthen, he set out through the courtyard, propped up by paracetamol against the last of his headache. He cast an embarrassed glance up to Vincenzo’s terrace, but of course there was nobody there.

I didn’t imagine that, did I? Vincenzo DID help me home… sort of?

He began his descent down the long mountain stairway. As the evening deepened, the fierce sunlight of the afternoon had mellowed to a more golden hue. Looking out over the view down the valley, he could see it blushing the terracotta rooftops, solemn church towers and deep green pine canopies of Ravello, stretched out on its mountain ridge against the distant blue sea beyond. Soon the sun would dip below the peaks of Monte Candelitto, casting the town into a premature dusk.

The air was still languidly warm, and the streets of Monte and San Martino were quiet. He saw nobody else until he reached the ancient stone gate that marked the entrance to the older part of town, where he exchanged a quiet ‘buonasera’ with an elderly couple who were coming the other way.

On the threshold of the town centre, he passed through a small square with an ancient stone fountain at its centre, then he forked uphill again, following an outlying path that led up to the Toro, where he and Marco were due to meet.

He paused for a minute at a section that looked like it had been recently rebuilt, and stared out at the view for a while. It was typically panoramic; it looked down over a wide sweep of the hillside below town, drawing down to the coast at Minori, which basked in the evening sun, the shore still dotted with a few late beachgoers.

He sighed.

IS it beautiful here? People tell me that it is. Luca, Daniele, Marco’s foster dad Gianni… they all seem to be able to see it. Something to do with not being born here. So why can’t I…?

…am I broken?

Broken or not, he had an appointment to keep. He turned away from the view, and soon he was among the grand old palazzi of the Toro.

They were due to meet at the Municipio gardens. As Cosmo ambled down the last stretch of the broad, crazy-paved street, he squinted through the colourful flower borders and the circle of lime trees, searching for Marco. At last, he caught sight of two young figures at the back of the garden and cut across the grass towards them.

They had set up camp at a spot that overlooked the avenue of oleanders heading down towards the square. Just beyond, the slender, ornate cathedral bell tower rose centre stage. Cosmo could just discern the sound of gentle conversation rising up the hill from the square’s many bars.

Marco was stretched out on the grass, watching over a pair of takeaway pizza boxes which were emitting an appetising, savoury scent. He looked as neat and tidy as ever, dressed for the evening in a dark blue and white check shirt tucked into the waistband of a pair of beige chinos. And, relaxing on the bench next to him, dressed down in a fitted tee and a pair of casual shorts… Giacomo. The dark-eyed boy was snickering at something on his phone screen; his eyes flicked up for a split second at Cosmo’s approach, then back down to the device in his hand.

“I’ve got to go, Dani,” he said. “He’s here.”

“Okay… ciao,” came a tinny voice from the other end of the video call.

Giacomo signed off with a peace sign and stuffed the phone into his pocket.

“Ciao, guys,” Cosmo said uncertainly, his gaze flicking from one boy to the other as he pondered Marco’s reasons for inviting this particular friend along. He was already starting to wonder whether he had been stitched up.

“Ciao, Cosmo,” Marco replied. “Come and sit down. We bought pizza.”

He opened the first box, revealing a perfectly thin and crispy-looking Napoli pizza loaded with mozzarella, tomato and anchovies. Despite his doubts, Cosmo felt his mouth begin to water. Between his binge with Elisabetta and the hangover that had followed, he hadn’t eaten a proper meal in days.

“Oh, Dio…” Cosmo mumbled, lowering himself to the grass. “That smells good.”

Marco smiled slightly and pushed the box towards him. “You’re looking better. Clean and everything.”

“Yeah… I’m detoxing,” Cosmo replied, making a feeble attempt at a joke. He reached for a large slice of pizza. “Thanks.”

Giacomo shuffled down from the bench, gave Marco a questioning glance, then helped himself to the next slice.

“Pizza always tastes best at dusk,” he murmured, his eyes briefly raking the hillside of Scala, which could just be discerned over the rooftops of the town and the row of umbrella pines that marked the edge of the square.

“So, ah…” Cosmo mumbled. “You guys are good, then?”

Giacomo nodded. “Yeah. Turns out, almost dying is a great motivator to fix your friendships.”

“No indiscretions, though?” Cosmo asked ironically. “I know you guys have a history.”

“Bleurgh!” Giacomo choked. “Only in Marco’s loopy brain.”

His tone was playful rather than cruel, but all the same, Cosmo thought he saw a flicker of hurt behind Marco’s answering smile. He frowned slightly.

Of course he’s gonna take that the wrong way. Can’t you see that, kid?

“Hey, Marco’s all right,” he said staunchly. “Gonna make some guy happy one day, for sure.”

“Ah, c’mon,” Marco grumbled, but he seemed mollified.

Giacomo gave the other boy a slightly guilty look. “’Course you are,” he said apologetically. “I didn’t mean… you know.”

“It’s okay, Giaco,” Marco replied, regaining his footing. “I know your mouth isn’t connected to your brain.”

Giacomo gaped at him for a moment, but then they both dissolved into giggles.

Cosmo blinked.

Wow, I guess they really ARE okay.

When they had both calmed down, Marco helped himself to a slice of pizza, and for a few seconds they ate together in companionable silence. Cosmo was finding the whole experience a bit strange. After the angry, substance-fuelled couple of days he had spent with Elisabetta, there was something so weirdly wholesome about the whole occasion.

“I’m sorry I blew you off the other day,” Cosmo said abruptly, turning to Marco, whose cool grey eyes flicked up to meet him. “Betta and me, we have a long history, but… I guess I was a bit of a dick. Again.”

Marco chewed his lip thoughtfully.

“It’s okay,” he said at length. “But I didn’t like seeing you like that.”

“Like what?” Cosmo asked.

“Smoking drugs, acting all weird.”

Nursing a dull spark of shame, Cosmo broke eye contact and ran his fingers through a few blades of grass. “Yeah, well. We deal with stuff differently, that’s all.”

Marco frowned. “I don’t think that can be a good way. What do you think, Giaco?”

Giacomo shook his head. “Nah. Sounds lousy.”

Cosmo scowled slightly. He didn’t like being judged.

“What would you know about it?” he protested.

But Giacomo was undaunted. “Why’ve you been flaking out on your job, Cosmo?” he pressed. “Pietro and Anna gave you a chance. Not turning up seems like a pretty crappy way to say thank you.”

“But I hate their stupid job!” Cosmo burst out. “And their guy Fabrizio gave me the worst bit of advice…” He tailed off. His defence had lurched in a direction he hadn’t expected.

Yeah, Cosmo, it was all because of Fabrizio’s ADVICE. It had nothing AT ALL to do with the fact that Vincenzo doesn’t like you that way and NEVER DID.

He simmered down and lapsed into silence, temporarily confused.

Marco pushed the box towards him again. “Have another slice of pizza.”

Grudgingly, Cosmo did.

“Is this, like, your version of drugs?” he grumbled.

Giacomo shrugged and helped himself to a further slice. “If it works.”

“It’s not gonna,” Cosmo retorted through a mouthful of cheese and salty anchovies.

Damn, it’s GOOD though.

“Gianni and Angelo sometimes say that you’ve ‘got to start somewhere’,” Marco replied. “If you don’t like working in the kitchen, maybe you can work your way up to something else? I thought you said you were looking forward to going out on the road with Fabrizio.”

“You guys suck,” Cosmo groused. “This is a total ambush. I’m being given life advice by a couple of kids younger than my little brother.”

Giacomo stirred, and suddenly Cosmo found himself fixed full-bore with a fierce dark-eyed stare. “Yeah, well, it’s only because you’re being so freaking stupid!

Cosmo bridled. “What the hell…?”

“Don’t you see?” Giacomo cried. “For the first time, you’ve got a family and friends who actually give a crap about you! You’ve got a home, a job, and a chance to build something real! But you want to throw it all away to get drunk and smoke weed with the girlfriend from hell until you have nobody else left.” He shook his head in frustration. “I can’t believe I took a bullet for you.”

Cosmo gaped at him. “That’s not fair…”

But Giacomo stopped him in his tracks by pulling up his t-shirt. Nestled to the side of his otherwise flawless, olive-skinned belly was the small, round scar where the stray police bullet had struck him. Cosmo stared at it, transfixed.

I did that. ME.

I learn from my mistakes,” Giacomo said quietly. “Can’t you?”

Cosmo looked down, his brief bubble of anger utterly deflated. Instead, he felt lost and confused.

“Go to work tomorrow, Cosmo,” Marco implored him. “Sort your life out while you still have the chance.” Morosely, the mousy-haired boy helped himself to a second slice of pizza and took a bite. “It’s good, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Cosmo mumbled.

Could he still try? Should he still try? But, privately, he couldn’t help feeling that it was way too late.

* * *

Despite Cosmo’s ruffled pride, Marco and Giacomo had persuaded him to persevere.

‘A chance to build something real,’ Giacomo had said. Cosmo wasn’t sure exactly what that meant, but he thought he liked the sound of it. And was Pietro’s crappy job really the key to that? Well, he’d give it one more go.

The next morning, he dragged himself out of bed early, attracting a confused, bleary-eyed glare from Luca, who was still working his way to consciousness in the next bed.

“Where are you going…?” Luca grumbled.

“To work, I hope,” Cosmo replied, “if I still have a job.”

Luca blinked and rubbed his eyes, as if unsure he was really awake.

“Oh,” he replied. “Good luck.”

“Thanks, bro,” Cosmo mumbled in surprise.

Luisa and Mario repeated Luca’s good wishes, and Cosmo had time to wonder at how differently people treated you when you ‘did the right thing’. It didn’t enhance his sense of belonging.

They’re only being nice to me because I’m doing what they want me to do.

And if Pietro turned him away? Well, there was still Elisabetta. If all else failed, she’d provide him with a distraction. Maybe reality could wait.

After he’d downed another cappuccino handed to him by Luisa and quickly wolfed down a tangy lemon croissant, he set off at a steady pace on the walk down to Da Rossi.

A quarter of an hour later he was walking along Via Roma with the restaurant in his sights, but then he paused. It clearly wasn’t a good moment, so he found a spot opposite the church where the buildings shaded him from the morning sun and stood back to watch.

Pietro and his mother were waiting in the open restaurant door. They were watching as a taxi pulled in through the narrow little street that led in from the valley road and stopped in front of them. The driver, whom Cosmo vaguely recognised as Daniele’s father Paolo, clambered out and hurried round to the passenger door. Moments later he was helping a grizzled older man out of the vehicle whom Cosmo recognised at once.

“Sergio,” he murmured to himself.

Sure enough, a beaming Anna had emerged from the back of the cab and was already stepping forward to re-present her father to her husband and mother-in-law.

“We’re finally back,” she enthused, brushing her long, beautiful dark hair behind her ears. “Isn’t it wonderful?”

Sergio had always been powerfully built for a man in his mid-sixties, but he looked like he had lost a bit of weight during his stay in hospital, and he was holding a walking stick in one hand. Despite his temporary frailty, he was smiling with pleasure to be home, and he wasted no time in stepping forwards to kiss first Pietro and then Marta on both cheeks.

“Marta, Pietro,” Sergio rumbled, “it makes my heart soar just to see you both again.”

“And mine, too,” Marta replied, moving to embrace him again. “I prayed for you every night. I hope you’ll let us prepare you some breakfast?”

“An offer I couldn’t possibly refuse,” Sergio replied graciously. “Lead the way.”

Taking the older man by the arm, accompanied by Anna, Marta led him into the cool interior of the restaurant, which had yet to open for the day. Pietro waited until Paolo had reversed his taxi back out onto the road, then made to follow the others, but Cosmo stepped out into the sunlight and managed to catch his eye.

“Oh!” Pietro exclaimed. “Ciao, Cosmo.”

Warily, Cosmo noted the faint edge of awkwardness to his surprise.

“It’s great to see the old man back,” he ventured. “Is he going to be okay?”

Pietro nodded in relief. “It’ll be a little while before he’s back in charge at the hotel, but Anna will see him right… and it’s great to have my wife back.”

Cosmo took a deep breath and embarked on the little speech he’d been rehearsing in his head as he walked down the mountain.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so useless this week,” he said. “I had a really bad day and things got a bit out of hand for a while. I’m not defending it. But… some of my friends talked some sense into me, and I’d really like another chance, if you’ll do that for me.”

Pietro sighed. “It’s been five days since you last came to work, Cosmo. I originally took you on to do Angelo and Gianni a favour, but you showed some real potential now and then.” He shrugged helplessly. “So, you see, I really wanted to this to work… but I just don’t think this is the right job for you.”

Cosmo’s heart sank. “Please…” he protested feebly, “I can learn from my mistakes, I swear…”

Pietro shook his head. “I’m sorry, Cosmo. It’s just too late for that. We’re a business, not a charity, and, in the end, I need staff I can count on. Anything else…” he cast his eyes down to the crazy paving, his usual professional air punctured, for once, by a trace of embarrassment, “…just isn’t a good investment.”

“So, there’s nothing I can do?” Cosmo said miserably.

Pietro forced himself to look him in the eye one more time. “Not here, not today. But I wish you the best of luck for the future. I hope you find the career you were meant for.”

Like what…?

“Thanks,” Cosmo mumbled but, in his heart, it felt like a little more colour had just been drained from the world.

Pietro nodded. “Arrivederci, Cosmo.”

He turned, retreated to the restaurant and closed the door behind him, leaving Cosmo standing alone in the unforgiving sun.

Copyright © 2024 James Carnarvon; All Rights Reserved.
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I'm at a loss as to what to say here. Cosmo finally realises that he does have good friends but I wonder if he really values them. I'll give him credit for trying to go back to work, but unsurprisingly it doesn't go well. Now will be the real test of his backbone, can he deal with the consequences of his actions and too to change his ways for his own future benefit, or will he give up and seek out Elisabetta and Giorgio? They may all be good kids separately, but together they are bad for each other and themselves. I'm hoping that Cosmo is not a lost cause, but I realise I may be hoping for the impossible.

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  On 4/10/2024 at 12:33 AM, Mancunian said:

I'm at a loss as to what to say here. Cosmo finally realises that he does have good friends but I wonder if he really values them. I'll give him credit for trying to go back to work, but unsurprisingly it doesn't go well. Now will be the real test of his backbone, can he deal with the consequences of his actions and too to change his ways for his own future benefit, or will he give up and seek out Elisabetta and Giorgio? They may all be good kids separately, but together they are bad for each other and themselves. I'm hoping that Cosmo is not a lost cause, but I realise I may be hoping for the impossible.

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Yep… testing times indeed…

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