Ralph: Breaking free - 27. Open Day and Photo Shoot

The run up to attending Fitness for All’s open day was all about logistics for Ralph. He finished work early, collected the twins from school as usual then brought them back home where, as quickly as possible, they changed, and he fed them. He wasn’t sure what time they’d get home from the gym, so it was best to be safe than sorry. He was somewhat disconcerted when, after changing out of school uniforms they reappeared in their football kit.

They were excited, they were going to see where Nolan worked and both insisted that as they were going to be in the publicity video, it was necessary for them to be dressed to match. Ralph had neither the heart nor the energy to argue. He just hoped they were not disappointed with their film appearance, and he insisted them bringing warm coats, in case they were cold. By the time they were ready to leave, Beth and Ivor were closing the office, but they all made their way independently to the gym.

Ralph’s limited experience of product and website launches usually involved alcohol at some point. But common sense told him that would not be the case here. Slightly away from the shiny new main entrance with its PPF-Parborough Perfect Fitness sign, there was a separate entrance, with a handsome sign saying Fitness for All at PPF, and a foyer linked the old section, now used by Fitness for All, with PPF’s more recent gym buildings. In the foyer there was a whole host of activities.

There were two vertical banners advertising the services offered by Nolan and Verne from classes to private sports therapy sessions, plus a large video screen which had the new video on loop (on silent thankfully). Nolan and Verne and two other people Ralph did not recognise were handing out leaflets and chatting to people, and some of whom seemed to be signing up. Ralph knew that Nolan and Verne and their colleagues had been spelling each other all day, whilst in the background their two main rooms had a programme of sample, free classes. There were people, like Ralph, who came from the outside simply out of interest, but others were gym members who were there already and simply curious.

As soon as they entered, the twins spotted the video and before Ralph could even think about speaking to anyone, two little hands were tugging at him, ‘Daddy, that’s us’ and indeed there they were on the screen. Luckily, Beth and Carine came over and were suitably impressed. Ralph realised that evening that his daughters were in many ways far more socially confident than he, and he watched in awe as the two nine-year-olds went round telling people that they were in the video and how wonderful the football was with Nolan. You had to laugh.

He had a brief panic, but then went up to Nolan and Verne, said hi, and shyly gave Nolan a quick kiss. The man looked surprised but delighted. They didn’t have long, there was always someone else for Nolan to speak to.

“Going well?”

Verne gave a laugh, “I’m exhausted but we’ve got lots of interest, people signing up. It seems to be working.” She turned to him, “Thanks.”

“For what?”

“For giving Nolan support and confidence when he needed it. Simply being there. And for finding Russ Kahn.”

“I don’t feel that I’ve…”

She laughed, “That’s the point. You just did it. And we’re both grateful. He’ll tell you properly when he’s recovered from today.”

She disappeared to speak to someone, but before she did, she turned back, “By the way, your daughters are a complete hit.”

He laughed, “They certainly didn’t get their charm from me!”

Russ Kahn had evidently been and gone, which was something of a relief. Ralph found himself a bit chary of meeting the man again, just yet. He chatted idly to Beth, Carine, and Ivor, grabbing the odd minute with Nolan, but then he spotted a familiar figure.

Wandering in from the main gym entrance was Gordon and another man, his husband Brian? Of course. Russ Kahn had given them memberships. Ralph decided to bite the bullet. He walked over to Gordon, said hello, and was introduced to Brian. He was a big, burly man but when he shook Ralph’s hand there was a warm smile, that even reached his eyes.

“So, that’s your man there?” Gordon nodded over towards Nolan.

“Yes. He’s been living, eating, and sleeping this for the last few weeks.”

Brian looked around, “Impressive and their offering looks tempting. We thought about booking some individual sessions, massage, or sports therapy”, he grinned. “The old muscles and joints beginning to creak a bit.”

Gordon smiled at Brian, “I say we go the whole hog and do the disco yoga class.”

The three men laughed; Ralph nodded. “Verne would love that; she’s always wanting to diversify the people who come.”

“Verne?”

Ralph pointed her out, “Nolan’s co-founder.”

At that moment the twins decided to come over and say hello to Daddy. Thankfully, both Brian and Gordon smiled when the twins appeared, and Brian squatted down and told them about his son, Toby, chatted about football and was duly impressed by their appearance on the video.

“Twins, eh?” Brain smiled when the twins were scooped up by Carine.

“Don’t. Double trouble.”

“They’re charming.”

“And know their own minds, even at nine. My ex-wife is going to have kittens when she realises that they’ve been wandering around in their sports kit.”

“Not a good look?”

“Not a bit. Therese wants two princesses but those two”, he nodded towards them, “have other ideas.”

“Look, we’d better book our sessions and then get back.”

“Toby’s with his Gran, so we can’t be late.”

Ralph looked from one to the other, “You mentioned getting together.”

“Yes, certainly. Gordon said that your man will be busy for a bit.”

“I’ll speak to Mum and Dad, and we’ll try and fix a lunch date in a few weeks. Can you cope with meeting them again?”

Ralph shook his head, “It’s been what, 15 years. I’d like to think that’s enough time for me to get over your Mum seeing the pair of us in action, including my naked bum.”

Gordon laughed, “Christ, I’d managed to expunge that image from my mind.”

Brian rolled his eyes, “Just one of many.”

“Hardly” Gordon stared at Ralph. “We’re all adults and that was a lifetime ago, agreed?”

“Agreed.”

“So, lunch in a few weeks and your twins can run riot in the orchard.”

“You’re on.”

---

It had seemed an easy enough thing to arrange the photo shoot for late on a Thursday afternoon; getting away from work for 4pm would surely be possible? But everything seemed to pile up. An event at the twins’ school on Tuesday; they would have pictures in the display, so Daddy had to be there as well as Mummy. Therese’s idea of the old council office had worked out well and an estate agent had arranged to take Ralph down to see the offices. The idea of taking the whole team had had to be canned. As Beth pointed out with a smile, someone had to do the work.

The trip to the school was worth the effort, he knew that the twins were delighted that Daddy could see their drawings and it was no effort for Ralph to be complementary. It was strange, doing something à quatre with Therese and the twins, even if it was only looking at drawings and other displays, then buying refreshments from stalls run by the school’s Friends organisation. And having two pairs of sharp ears around meant that Ralph was excused further quizzing by Therese. Thank goodness.

The new offices seemed promising, too. Not too lovely, but functional and viable, they would make a decent place to park everyone, pro tem. The estate agent promised to send all the details, and Ralph would have to get his solicitor to check over the lease. It was all a hassle, but it was a nice problem to have.

Then Thursday afternoon came, it almost felt fun to be playing hooky. Photographer Edward Hirsch’s converted barn studio was as impressive as ever but with Edward, Morrie, Ivor, Norton and Ralph as well as Morrie’s assistant, India inside, it began to seem a little crowded. Whilst Morrie faffed around getting them all something to drink, Edward effectively ignored them and continued his setting up.

It was India who was the really organised one. To one side of the room, they had a group of rather utilitarian, plastic baskets filled with their garments for the shoot, all sorted by size as specified in advance. India was short, dark-haired and somewhat stout, quiet and orderly, they remained unperturbed by Morrie’s more emotional approach.

Faced with this assemblage of miniscule garments, the three men simply stared. Ivor picked up one of the items, a bright red scrap of fabric.

“This will fit me?” Ivor looked at India and they nodded, quoting the size.

Ivor shook his head and gave a nervous laugh, “If you say so.”

He headed behind the screen to change. After a longer than expected silence, with just the sound of scrabbling of clothes, there was a cry of “You’ve fucking got to be joking.” There was another pause, and he reappeared wearing just his boxers and carrying the red garment.

“How the hell does this fit?”

India gave small smile, took the garment from him, and held it against their thigh, “On the side.” And they pulled the garment to demonstrate how it stretched.

“You sure?”

They nodded. Ivor disappeared again and after a moment there was a cry of bloody hell, and he reappeared. Ivor was tall, slim, skinny almost and very pale with a dark, thick treasure trail. The thong went around his left thigh, cramming his bits to one side.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this”, he glared at Ralph, “and you won’t catch me doing it again.”

Despite his protestations, Ivor was a good sport and made a decent subject in front of the camera. Whilst Edward photographed him, Nolan and Ralph stripped down to their underwear, figuring that was no different to what Ivor was wearing.

Nolan selected a garment, but India stopped him, explaining that it was too like the one Ivor was wearing. Nolan reappeared looking rather red and embarrassed, wearing a thong that seemed to be emulating snakeskin. His first photo finished, Ivor reappeared, grinned at Nolan, “Nice!”

Nolan was uncomfortable in front of the camera, so Edward suggested Ralph join him. Ralph was wearing a strange pair of briefs that had elaborate cut-outs in them, leaving his dick barely covered, perhaps that was the idea. It worked unless you moved around a lot; definitely only for posing. Nolan laughed at him and the two fooled around as Edward took pictures.

It ended up a good-natured couple of hours. They all had a good laugh at some of the garments, trying to imagine ever wearing them in earnest. But they had to admit that the designer knew his stuff, there were no accidents, surprisingly all their bits had stayed in place despite the apparent ridiculousness of some of the designs. And it wasn’t all crazy stuff, there were briefs and boxer-brief type shapes too, though as Ivor pointed out, they all seemed to emphasise your junk. India had grinned at this comment and pointed out that that was the idea. India had even sorted out some sports clothes for Nolan, far sexier than anything he’d wear normally, but they’d do for his photos later. The good-naturedness came over in the later images as both Nolan and Ralph stopped worrying about the camera and Edward was in a happier mood too.

Ralph stuck close to Nolan. Luckily Morrie was far too busy faffing around and getting in India’s way to start getting ideas about Ralph wearing very little. At least, that’s what Ralph hoped. He wondered whether the notion that Morrie was getting ideas was a dud one. But the guy was clearly noticing, and Morrie was definitely tactile.

When they finished there was still a bit of time, so Nolan got into his football kit and had some more photos taken. Nolan commented about feeling a prat, dressed in his kit in the studio, but Ralph managed to make him laugh by saying he’d feel a bigger prat when Ralph took his knickers off too.

Ivor quickly dressed and announced that he’d wait outside for his girlfriend Milly, who was joining them at the studio whereas Beth and Carine would be waiting at the restaurant. Morrie and India disappeared into the tiny kitchen, where they planned to sort out the garments.

Ralph dutifully pushed down his knickers and walked over to the photographer, whilst Nolan watched as he took his football boots off. Edward had adjusted the lighting and motioned them over. He was admirably self-possessed, making no comment about Ralph’s undressed state and treating it as quite natural. He also started chatting to them, about the shoot, about the costumes, about the plans for the website. Anything, Ralph suspected, to keep Ralph’s mind off the fact that he was exposed.

Nolan had disappeared behind the screen, to take off his sports gear and get dressed but when he emerged, looking very self-conscious, he was naked too.

“What’s going on?”

“I thought I’d join you. That’s OK, isn’t it?”

Ralph grinned, “More than.”

“It’s just”, Nolan turned to Edward, “we can do it without me actually showing my bits?”

Edward smiled then nodded and positioned Nolan behind a seated Ralph. The two fooled around a bit, and Nolan at one point ground his crotch into Ralph’s back. The resulting photo of the two of them laughing was a great hit. Edward also managed some pictures where neither guy was showing anything. When they saw them, Nolan joked about one being suitable for Ralph to send to his parents. Ralph nearly exploded with laughter but then thought, why not!

Getting dressed afterwards, Nolan gave a wry smile, “You know, that wasn’t so bad. Almost fun.”

Ralph laughed, “You mean we’ll do it again.”

“I wouldn’t say that. But taking your clothes off isn’t as bad as it seems.”

Ralph leaned over and kissed him, though they were interrupted by a voice from the door, Ivor asking if they were done. He reappeared with Milly. She was something of a surprise. Ralph had seen a couple of photos of her, just head and shoulders. Ivor didn’t do social media but accumulated photographs in online albums that he’d sometimes share with them.

But in person she was bigger than Ralph had imagined, tall and strapping is how he’d describe her. She was wearing a man’s style shirt, well done up but hanging loose; technically demure, in fact it showed off her magnificent bosom and mane of blond hair, worn loose today. She was also completely charming and clearly didn’t take Ivor seriously, she called him ‘Mr Grumps’ and seemingly he loved it.

Morrie’s choice of restaurant had seemed odd at first; he’d gone for the Lebanese place where Ralph had had lunch with Marcus and Emil. The cuisine and style weren’t ones that Ralph associated with Morrie, but as they walked from the car park to the restaurant India explained that it had been their suggestion, as the place coped happily with large parties and they had checked and found that the menu had a remarkable selection of vegetarian and vegan dishes, adding that they were veggie too, so it was in their best interest.

The place wasn’t too busy, and the party had a long table in an alcove at the back, so that they were relatively quiet yet had a view of the main restaurant. The busy-ness of arranging seats, getting drinks and the waiters bringing complementary bread and dips took quite a time. Morrie sat at one end of the table and India the other, then in between people sat opposite their partners, which meant that Morrie had Ivor and Milly on his right and left, whilst Ralph was between Milly and Carine, with Nolan next to Beth and Ivor. It sort of worked. Morrie had chatted eagerly to Milly as they’d walked from the car park and had seemed to move people effortlessly into allotted places, as if he’d planned it. Ralph decided that Morrie was rather taken with Milly, and frankly felt happy that the spotlight of Morrie’s attention had moved on.

Mind, Morrie insisted on standing up and making a speech, thanking everyone and inviting them to the launch. But he managed to raise a laugh as he forgot the exact details of time and location and had to check with India. When he explained that everyone would get hi-res copies of their own images for personal use, Ivor had glowered.

“They’ll be securely locked up.”

Milly however had smiled, “Come on, Ivor, they’re fun. Perhaps I’ll have one on my phone.”

“Bloody hell, Mills!” But Ivor had smiled.

Beth was laughing, “And are we having some on the ‘WebIdeal’ website?”

Ivor then wiggled his eyebrows, “I gather Ralph did some in the altogether.”

Ralph went a bit red, leaned over and patted Nolan’s hand, “They were purely for private use.”

Nolan however looked devilish, “Mind, there was a nice one of the two of us. All discreet, no bits showing. Ralph’s going to send it to his Mother and Father.”

Ivor and Beth, who both knew some of Ralph’s history with his parents, promptly erupted in gales of laughter then the joke had to be explained to everyone. That sort of moved the conversation on, from semi-naked pictures to parents. Corinne joked about her Mother’s Sunday lunches and the recent ructions caused by her Mother being too ill to host them, Nolan mentioned his Mother’s late change of career into a hobby farmer and so on. Only Morrie kept quiet, his relationship with his Father, as Ralph had learned, was less than ideal.

Inevitably, the contrast between the way Nolan and Ralph’s parents had dealt with the men’s sexuality came up. There was lots of discussion, and Morrie casually dropped in a comment about his Father’s inability to accept Morrie being open, that as far as his Father was concerned, sexuality was a private matter and Morrie needed to be discreet. Ivor’s comment of ‘That’s why you’ve been photographing us nearly naked’, thankfully drew a laugh, and diffused the atmosphere.

India kept quiet, though they contributed to other discussions, and Ralph recalled Morrie commenting at some point that India’s parents had had trouble accepting India’s decision to transition and that the parents’ whole attitude was mired in a complete lack of understanding of sexuality and gender. Though later in the meal, Ralph noticed Corinne and India having a quiet discussion, whilst Beth talked animatedly to Nolan about ideas for promoting his company’s website.

It was that sort of evening; conversation didn’t quite flow easily but there was enough to talk about. Nolan discussing plans for promoting his company, including the photos of him in football gear, led to the video which inevitably led to stories about the twins, and it seemed virtually everyone had an anecdote to tell.

Then Milly turned to Ralph, “What are you going to tell the twins about the photo shoot?”

Ralph’s eyebrows shot up, “Nothing. If I can help it.”

Ivor smiled, “Daddy did some pictures with no clothes on, and you’ll need to be older to see them.”

Beth pulled a face, “Does it matter. Really?”

“I’d have to ask Therese.”

“But it’s hardly as if you’re flashing your bits.”

Ivor laughed, “Wrong! Those thongs are pretty graphic.”

Beth nodded, “We’ll be putting the full photos behind an age-restriction on the website.”

Ralph agreed, but he was still undecided about what to do.