The Trial of Jordan Colmar - 8. Epilogue

Jason

Jason stared at Jordan's back. If looks could kill, his would have burned his one-time friend to a crisp. He knew what Peter was about to say, agreed with it even, but wondered if Jordan would even listen. Probably not.

He felt pressure on his hand and smiled before he turned to face Peter. It was about to be over. Almost a year to the day, Jordan was going to get what he deserved; hopefully. Mr. Hember certainly thought the judge would give Jordan a lengthy sentence.

"You okay?" Peter whispered, so low Jason needed to read his lips to understand.

Unsure his voice would cooperate, he nodded his response. There would be time to talk once they left the courthouse.

"Your Honor." The prosecutor's voice drew his attention. "Mr. Gregory would like to exercise his right to give a victim impact statement in person."

Mr. Pratner motioned for Peter to come forward. Jason gave Peter's hand a quick squeeze before letting go. It hurt to see his once self-assured boyfriend look so uncertain. This setting unnerved them both, but only Peter had to speak.

“Your Honor?” Peter appeared tentative to Jason. “Am I allowed to direct my remarks to Jordan?”

Judge Milton nodded, maybe even smiled a hair. “You may, but you have to remain civil, is that clear?”

"I understand, sir." Slowly, as if unsure he really wanted to do it, Peter angled his body so he could look at Jordan. Shackled, but dressed in a suit, Jordan stared at the table in front of him.

“It doesn’t surprise me you won’t look at me, Jordan. The night of the attack, you distracted me so others could jump me from behind. You were a coward then and you haven’t changed. Whether you want to or not, you have to listen to me now.

“I'll never really know why you made me the butt of your anger. Maybe it was because of my relationship with Jason, I don't know. Even that makes no sense to me, but since you won't tell me, I'm left to guess.

"Despite knowing you don't care one bit, I'm going to tell you what your attack has done to me. Even if you don't listen, you'll hear it at least."

Peter stared at Jordan, as if waiting for him to look up. Jason knew that wouldn't happen, and it didn't. Finally Peter shrugged. "The most obvious consequence is I’m no longer allowed to compete in Martial Arts tournaments. According to my doctors, the broken bones in my face and spine are at risk should I sustain a direct blow. I'll probably be able to teach again, though I doubt I'll try. I have too much anger to instill the discipline needed to be a good teacher. If you wanted to take away something dear to me, you succeeded. Thanks to you, I’ll never get the chance to compete for another State Championship.

Peter swallowed twice. He glanced toward the gallery looking sadder than Jason had seen in a long time.

"As bad as my physical injuries and the lasting effects were, the mental problems you caused me are worse. After the attack I was depressed, angry, irritable. I nearly lost Jason because of what you did to me. Despite all he did to help me recover, I nearly let my issues break us up. If that was what you wanted, you failed. We're still together and we're still happy."

Reliving that painful period, even briefly, hurt Jason and he knew what talking about it in public cost Peter.

"But it doesn't end there. Whenever Jason and I go out at night, I’m always checking to see where I am and who's around me. Where once I enjoyed going out, now I can’t relax enough to have fun. Twice I almost punched a friend who came up behind me unexpectedly. That's a direct result of your attack on me.

“I still have nightmares, the kind were I scream in my sleep. I'm still in therapy to overcome the emotional scars from the attack, and I think I've become a more callous, cynical person. The new me is not someone I like as much as the person I was before."

Peter sniffed hard, but never let his glare leave Jordan. “You don't care about me or what happened, I know that, but we both know you attacked me to get back at Jason. I'll never understand why you set out to hurt him or me, and frankly I don’t care. All I want is for this to be over and for you to go to jail, where you belong.”

Peter turned back to the Judge. “Your honor, I've given a lot of thought to what I wanted to say to you today. What I said to Jordan is the crux of the effects this assault has had on me. Now I'd like to tell you what I think should happen to Jordan Colmar.

“I know the final decision is yours. Unlike me, my family, Jason and my other friends, you don't have a personal stake in what happens today. Were I to base what I’m going to say on my emotions, I would ask you to give him every day you possibly can, but I want you to know that my words are based on more than just emotions.

“There are two things I want to address. The first is the nature of the attack. As you heard during the trial, I did nothing to provoke this attack. Jason and I avoided Jordan as best we could. I was attacked because I was gay and I was dating his onetime best friend. This was a hate crime against a gay person.

“Any sentence you hand out today will send a message to everyone who thinks it's okay to attack gay people based on our sexuality. I’m asking that you keep in mind that a lenient sentence will signal it's open season on gay men and women. A lengthy sentence will tell people you can’t hurt us without being punished in return.

“The other thing I want to tell the court is that Jordan in as unremorseful and unrepentant a person as you will ever meet. No matter what sob story he gives you, no matter how much he says he's changed when he asks you for mercy, don’t believe it. It’s all an act. He'll say or do anything to get his way. If you need proof, look no further than what he did during the trial.

“Jordan, through his high priced lawyers, attempted to save himself by attacking everyone who testified against him. First it was Officer Bennett, then Jason and to a lesser extent me. He and his lawyer tried to make it seem like everyone else was lying except him. He's the same petty, spiteful, vindictive person he was on the night I was attacked. There isn’t an ounce of remorse in him; just a self centered, ‘me first’ person who will never change.

“I don't know what the maximum penalty is, but I’m asking you to impose it. This person should never be allowed to walk freely again. He'll only hurt someone else if you give him the chance. I know what I suffered, what my family and friends had to endure, and I know how much the person I love suffered at his hands. It would be wrong to let him do it to someone else.

“Thank you.”

Jason resisted the urge to leap from his seat and smother Peter in his arms. At that moment, he couldn't have been prouder of his boyfriend. After what felt like an eternity, Peter sat next to him, allowing Jason to squeeze his hand.

Jordan was given the chance to address the court last. Although Jason heard the speech, he didn't remember much of its content. He was too focused on how Peter would react to pay closer attention. All he remembered was that Jordan continued to deny his involvement and played up how he was a good person.

The courtroom felt like it was holding its breath when Jordan sat down. Judge Milton sat quietly, his pen moving quickly across something in front of him. After he appeared to underline something twice, he put his pen down and stared at the gallery.

“Mr. Colmar,” he said, breaking the unnatural silence. “Please stand.”

Noting the dispassionate expression on the face of his one-time friend, Jason felt a pang of guilt that he didn't feel any sympathy for Jordan. To him, this person reminded him nothing of the friend he’d known as a child. The judge spoke again, drawing Jason's attention away from Jordan.

“I've had an opportunity to review the transcripts from the trial,read the letters submitted by the defense on behalf of Mr. Colmar, I've considered the statements made in court today, the sentencing memorandum submitted by both sides, and reviewed the applicable sentencing guidelines. Before I sentence you, Mr. Colmar, I want to review the factors that weighed on my decision.

“There are several principles a judge should consider when deciding on what sentence to impose. The Pennsylvania Supreme Court has said I should ask myself the following questions: does the sentence act to deter future crime, both specifically as to the defendant and generally with the public at large; does the sentence punish the defendant for his crime; does the sentence act to rehabilitate the defendant; does the sentence reflect the mitigating factors, if any, presented by the defendant, and does it reflect the aggravating factors, if any?"

Judge Milton peered up from his notes and stared at the defense table. Trying to read anything from his face was impossible for Jason.

"I've carefully considered each of the questions in my decision. I'm going to address these areas in my remarks and explain why I believe the sentence I'm going to impose encompasses each of these factors."

"Mr. Colmar, I've been a judge for almost twenty years. In that time, I've been asked to sentence many defendants. Some were young, some were older; some rich, some poor. Each of these cases brought with them a unique set of facts. Each case is different, each case requires different considerations.

"Your lawyer tells me that you are a fine young man, from a good family, going to a good school. He says you have a bright future, and that this incident is totally out of character for the person who stands before me today.

"The prosecutor paints a very different picture of you, one that is not flattering in the least. The government contends you are a cold calculating, menace to society. That you are without remorse and unrepentant.

"Often times the truth lies somewhere between the two and this time is no exception. There are elements of truth in what both sides have said; you come from a good family, go to a good school and had a bright future ahead of you before this incident. You also carried out a cold, vicious attack on an innocent person and have no remorse for what you did."

Hearing this, Jason suppressed a whoop of excitement. The judge saw through Jordan's lies. Hopefully he'd give him the long jail sentence he deserved.

"In reviewing the evidence, I am in complete agreement with the jury's decision. It is my opinion that you lied multiple times in your testimony. I did not find you to be a credible witness. Your testimony, in my opinion, was a complete fabrication, one that was designed to mislead and confuse the jury.

"I also have little doubt that you and Warren Berimen conspired to commit perjury. Is my belief that, based on the evidence, you had a hand in Mr. Berimen's willful and deliberate perjury in this trial.

"The evidence of guilt was overwhelming. You, not Edward Portman, or anyone else, organized and carried out the vicious and brutal beating of Peter Gregory. The evidence was also clear that this is a hate crime. The motivation for this assault was based on Mr. Gregory's sexual orientation.

"In my time on the bench I do not believe I have ever had a defendant come before me who had less redeeming qualities than you do. As your lawyer pointed out, you come from a well-to-do family, you were attending an excellent school, and had a bright future ahead of you. There was no reason at all for you to be involved in this type of crime. You had everything going for you and you tossed it all away.

"You maintained your innocence throughout the trial, as is your right. But as I have said, in my opinion the evidence is overwhelming that you were not only guilty of this offense, but you were the most culpable of all the defendants. Without you, this attack would never have taken place. You were the instigator, the motivator, the driving force behind what happened to Peter Gregory on October 7, 2009.

“There are no mitigating factors that I can see in this case. There are several aggravating factors that weigh against you: you show no remorse, you were the one who instigated this attack, you conspired with another witness to commit perjury, and you lied on the stand.

“As has been said before, this was a brutal and senseless attack on a young man who did nothing to deserve what happened to him. I do not believe leniency would achieve any of the goals of sentencing. It would not deter you, it would not deter others, it would not serve to punish you for what you did, and it would not rehabilitate you. In short, you do not deserve leniency.

"For all these reasons I'm going to impose the following sentence. On the first count, attempted murder in the second-degree while armed, I sentence you to the required twenty to forty years in jail. On the enhancement, that this was a hate crime, I sentence you to an additional twenty to forty years to be served consecutive to any other sentence I imposed today. On the conspiracy count, I sentence you to twenty to forty years to be served consecutive to any other sentence I impose today. Because I have already sentenced you to twenty to forty years for the enhancement, I will not impose an additional enhancement on the conspiracy count. On the weapons charge, that you, or one of your co-conspirators used a deadly or dangerous weapon, I sentence you to two and a half to five years consecutive to any other sentence imposed. On the charge of possession of instruments of crime, to whit a baseball bat, I sentence you to two and a half to five years consecutive to all other sentences. It is my opinion that the other assault counts all merge for the purpose of sentencing and as such I will not impose any further sentence on the other counts.

"I take no joy in sentencing someone as young and with as much potential as you had to a minimum of sixty-five years in jail with no chance of parole. But to impose any lesser sentence would be a miscarriage of justice. It would minimize the severity of what happened, and would not reflect the complete and utter lack of remorse I have witnessed in you during these proceedings.

"Because this was a trial, I'm required to advise you that you have a right to appeal the jury's decision and my rulings to the Superior Court of Pennsylvania. Any appeal must be docketed within thirty days. If you cannot afford an attorney to file your appeal, one will be appointed to represent you."

"That is a sentence of this court." Milton nodded toward the deputies next to Jordan. "The defendant is remanded to the custody of the Sheriff for transport to the state correctional diagnostic center at Camp Hill for imposition of sentence. These proceedings are adjourned."

Jason watched the deputies lead Jordan from the courtroom. Before he left, he looked back briefly at where he and Peter sat. The urge to flip him off, wave goodbye, or give him an exaggerated smirk almost overwhelmed his good sense. In the end, he simply hugged Peter.

***

The news conference was in progress before he and Peter reached the courthouse steps. Holding Peter's hand, Jason tried to keep well away from the cameras and reporters. Martin and the District Attorney were addressing the media, allowing them to remain out of the spotlight.

"Why don't you two head out the back?" Amanda motioned with her head to the door they'd all just used. "You won't have a chance to escape the press if you wait much longer."

Peter smiled and kissed his mother. When Barbara nodded her agreement, Jason leaned in and kissed his mother's cheek. With only a quickly glance back to be sure they weren't followed, Jason let Peter lead them toward the exit in the rear of the courthouse.

"It's over." Peter sounded relieved.

"Finally." Thankful for the length of sentence, Jason didn't find the pleasure in it he anticipated. "Are you happy with the sentence?"

Peter stopped, his face scrunched up. "Happy's the wrong word. I think it was the sentence that needed to be imposed, but I'm not happy. I can't feel good that someone our age is going to spend the rest of his life in prison."

Jason nodded. "Glad I'm not the only one who feels like that." He left out his other thoughts; there'd be time for them to discuss it more later.

Peter gave him a thin smile, his body relaxing finally. "C'mon, Soccer Boy, let's get outta here."

“Mr. Gregory!” They both turned around. A tall, slightly shaggy man in black glasses and a media badge around his neck was walking toward them. Jason recognized him as the reporter from the Advocate who tried to get a story during the trial.

“Can I get a statement now?”

They exchanged questioning looks. “Why not?” Jason shrugged.

They talked about the trial and sentence for a few minutes. Just as they were about to go, the reporter asked, “So, are you two doing okay?”

Still holding hands, they smiled at each other. Jason nodded, watching Peter do the same.

"We are now," Peter said, giving the man a small wave.

Walking away, Jason realized it had been over a year since he felt things were good between them. "We are now," he whispered.

Peter turned, winked and squeezed his hand. "I love you, Jase."

Leaning closer, Jason pressed their lips together. "Good, ‘cause you know I love you."