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    Doctor Oger
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

The Sock Drawer - 19. Shade's Remembrance

font face="Georgia,serif">Poetry Prompt 6: Elegy in four-lined stanzas with 8 syllables each. Rhyme scheme a-b-b-a. Theme: 'Remember'/'Remembrance'.

Shade's Remembrance

 

Red light infused dead dust with life;

he was the one with glowing eyes

who taught Shade how to live by lies,

the remnants of defeat and strife.

 

The closest friends, Blood Gem and Shade,

explored the caves of both their minds,

discovered both their separate kinds

in private ways their world forbade.

 

Their haven was a misty glade,

their sprig of love a secret thing,

so far removed from sunny spring

and all its gaudy plant parade.

 

It was a labyrinth of trees

and glinting rock in grey and black;

once there, they never wanted back

to beg forgiveness on their knees.

 

And beg they never did because

they found they were not wrong at all,

but still they had to heed the call

of daylight's world, its stifling force.

 

The obstacle they knew as life

came in the shape of family,

who found that the best remedy

for their son's state would be a wife.

 

They employed time and clever skill,

nursing an infatuation

with a beauty of his station

and bending Blood Gem to their will.

 

While strolling in the sunny park

with Blossom, fragrant, soft and sweet,

Blood Gem forgot through this new seed

his Shade, alone, left in the dark.

 

So glad and joyful was he, when

he told Shade of his future bloom

and all that Shade could hear was doom,

when turned from 'love' to his 'best man'.

 

Shade held a speech with so much cheer

as you find in a crumbling grave;

yet artful was he, and so brave

that cheer was all Blood Gem could hear.

 

The Shade, he did right by his friend.

Then after, fireworks did start -

those stars were his exploding heart

and all his light died in the end.

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Doctor Oger; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Beautiful, Doc.
I don't know with whom I have more compassion: Blood Gem or Shade. It seems they each have their own kind of sadness ahead of them. Ennis and Jack come to mind.
Thanks for posting this.

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On 01/11/2016 04:26 AM, J.HunterDunn said:

Beautiful, Doc.

I don't know with whom I have more compassion: Blood Gem or Shade. It seems they each have their own kind of sadness ahead of them. Ennis and Jack come to mind.

Thanks for posting this.

Oh, you're right. They have a very similar story. But I suppose there used to be (and still are) thousands of stories like this.

Thank you.

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I'm glad you took the Elegy stanza and played with its strong storytelling ability. Tennyson certainly did that, and I wanted to introduce that freedom as something we can all strive for. Here, I think you reached it!

 

It's tricky to make the b-b rhymes not sound 'corny' in English, but here the Elegy form finds the noble place it feels most comfortable and stately.

 

As for the content…poor Shade. I guess he's an ombra now…

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Wow, yeah, Peter's right - Blood Gem being Ennis, and Shade being Jack. It's been quite some time, I hope I didn't mix up the names.

 

This was a heartbreaking poem, Doc. AC would probably shoot me, but I don't know the difference between an Elegy or a Tanka or any of the others you guys are writing. lol But I do know this was another of your beautiful poems that brought tears to my eyes, Doc.

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On 01/11/2016 09:10 AM, AC Benus said:

I'm glad you took the Elegy stanza and played with its strong storytelling ability. Tennyson certainly did that, and I wanted to introduce that freedom as something we can all strive for. Here, I think you reached it!

 

It's tricky to make the b-b rhymes not sound 'corny' in English, but here the Elegy form finds the noble place it feels most comfortable and stately.

 

As for the content…poor Shade. I guess he's an ombra now…

Yes, it is difficult to mold something naturalsounding into the shape of eight syllables with that rhyme scheme (which I don't normally use, for no particular reason).

And thank you.

Does the word have a particular meaning beyond "shadow"?

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On 01/11/2016 12:39 PM, Lisa said:

Wow, yeah, Peter's right - Blood Gem being Ennis, and Shade being Jack. It's been quite some time, I hope I didn't mix up the names.

 

This was a heartbreaking poem, Doc. AC would probably shoot me, but I don't know the difference between an Elegy or a Tanka or any of the others you guys are writing. lol But I do know this was another of your beautiful poems that brought tears to my eyes, Doc.

You know I strive to make you cry.

Thank you very much. And I'm glad you enjoyed it melancholically.

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