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Poetry - 4. Raindrops / Cinquain

This is my first attempt at poetry in twenty years, so please be kind (LOL). I read in the Live Poet Society about cinquains and this is my attempt at that poetry forms. No spanish version, I wrote it in English (:rolleyes:)

Raindrops

in my window

bring back memories of those

childhood days now far forgotten

I miss.

Copyright © 2016 Roberto Zuniga; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Roberto, I like it. It's sweet and it totally works. I haven't tried one of this form yet. And I'm sure it's not a simple as it looks.
tim

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I think Parker in the Live-Poets Society thread said the Cinquain form is good for stirring up memories and melancholia; this poem proves that brilliantly!

 

It's a lovely poem, and the rain and window image is the perfect metaphor for the message. Well done.

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On 01/31/2016 05:54 AM, Mikiesboy said:

Roberto, I like it. It's sweet and it totally works. I haven't tried one of this form yet. And I'm sure it's not a simple as it looks.

tim

Thanks Tim! Something funny I noticed is that is not young passion but adult melancholy. Funny, huh?

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On 01/31/2016 07:08 AM, AC Benus said:

I think Parker in the Live-Poets Society thread said the Cinquain form is good for stirring up memories and melancholia; this poem proves that brilliantly!

 

It's a lovely poem, and the rain and window image is the perfect metaphor for the message. Well done.

Funny but true! When I started trying to write it, the first thing that came to mindt open the poem was Raindrops ... and it just took off from there. Thanks for your feedback AC!

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I liked it, Roberto. As a kid, i had an illness that kept me inside for months, and I spent a lot of time looking out... I pictured the drops running down the window on their crazy, zigzag journeys... well done... cheers... Gary...

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Rain is definitely a beautiful memory for me. I used to, still do sometimes, rain dance from my childhood. I miss those moments. Thank You for bringing back those memories.

 

A Nice poem Robby... :)

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On 01/31/2016 05:41 PM, Headstall said:

I liked it, Roberto. As a kid, i had an illness that kept me inside for months, and I spent a lot of time looking out... I pictured the drops running down the window on their crazy, zigzag journeys... well done... cheers... Gary...

Thanks a lot Gary. I was also an indoor kid because of asthma. Hope my poem brought back good feelings :)

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On 01/31/2016 06:15 PM, Emi GS said:

Rain is definitely a beautiful memory for me. I used to, still do sometimes, rain dance from my childhood. I miss those moments. Thank You for bringing back those memories.

 

A Nice poem Robby... :)

I'm really glad you liked it Emi! XO

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On 02/03/2016 06:14 AM, albertnothlit said:

I love the sound of rain more than any other sound. This poem is awesome.

Thank you very much Albert!

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I m not really fond of rain...but it's true...when I see it I remember my school days...when my friends and I played in the field getting all muddy and then never hearing the end of it from my parents:/

So I think I understand the feeling of being nostalgic when looking at raindrops on the window...yet another nice writing...short n simple !!

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On 8/7/2017 at 1:28 AM, Aviana said:

I m not really fond of rain...but it's true...when I see it I remember my school days...when my friends and I played in the field getting all muddy and then never hearing the end of it from my parents:/

So I think I understand the feeling of being nostalgic when looking at raindrops on the window...yet another nice writing...short n simple !!

 

Thank you! I'm happy you liked it!

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