Lust in London - 9. Chapter 9

Two days passed without a word between the two. Alex attempted email after email, but nothing seemed suitable. He went back to school and did as best he could. He wanted to forget about the arguments and just focus on law.

It was the end of class, 4 pm. His cell phone buzzed and he glanced at the screen. It was Mason. Alex let it ring about three times before he picked up.

“Hi.” He said coolly.

“Hello, Alex. Listen, we need to talk. We can’t leave this as it is. I’m leaving tomorrow!”

Alex felt his mouth run dry. He grappled for the right words in his mind. “What? I thought you were here for a lot longer!”

“Well, it doesn’t matter anymore now, does it? I go where the company sends me, not you! Now, do you wanna get together or not?”

Alex paused for a moment.

“Alex?”

“Yeah, what the hell, I need some good dick before you leave town again. Where you wanna meet?”

“Always up for a good dick, I’ll pick you up tonight. Be ready at 7. Bye.”

“Bye.” Alex slapped the phone shut and shoved it into his pocket.

He felt a wave of emotion fall over him, but pushed it away.

“Fucker. Why do I have to love him?”

Mason picked him up at 7 precisely. Dinner was calm and congenial. Neither man spoke much. Alex kept looking over his salmon filet and into his lover’s blue eyes. He’d missed the eyes and the body so much, but the mouth that kept pissing him off was also attached. Mason replied to the stare fest.

“Alex is something wrong with your dinner?”

“No. Nothing. It’s great, actually. I love fish.”

Mason laid his fork down and reached for his lover’s hand across the table. Alex hesitated, but finally begrudgingly accepted it and held on tight.

“Hey, look at me. Please?” The brown orbs finally looked up into his companion’s. “Alex, I’m sorry I’ve been an ass to you. I mean it! I’ve never met anyone serious on these trips before. It was usually just a coffee or two and nothing more. I guess I don’t know how to act.”

Alex laughed and wrested his hand away. “Are you serious? You don’t know how to act? Gimme a break! Mason, you’ve had a serious relationship! What did you two do, just have sex all the time? There’s more to this than just that! You’re my first relationship ever and even I know that!”

Mason bowed his head and shook it. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m acting like this. You must bring out something peculiar in me.”

Alex frowned. “Something peculiar, what the hell do I bring out in you?”

Mason shrugged. “I dunno. You’re different than the guy I had before, in every way. I guess we’re just really different.”

Alex sighed and wet his lips. He eyed his lover up and down. There was no denying his lust for the man and his true feelings. Surely this would pass; they just needed to work on it. He leaned in close to Mason’s ear. “We can celebrate those differences. Let’s say goodbye on a good note. I want this trip to have good memories.”

“Agreed, I don’t want to argue with you anymore. It’s self-defeating and not any fun. Are you still hungry?”

Alex glanced at his plate and noted that he’d barely touched his dinner. “Yeah, actually I am. I think I just got my appetite back.”

Mason winked at him. “Don’t eat too much, you’ll get all bloated. Hmm, on the other hand, you’d have to strip down to feel more comfortable. That would be a very good thing.” He eyed his young lover and licked his lips lustfully.

Alex laughed. “You’re incorrigible. Come on, let’s finish up. I want dessert back at the hotel.”

“You sly lil demon you. Eat up; I’m getting hungrier for that dessert as we speak. I want to make this up to you.”

“Let’s ride.”

They finished up their dinner and headed out to the car. They went up to the hotel room and had a long make out session only. Mason shifted to his side and fell asleep. Alex fought tears and fell asleep.

So much for making it up to me.

The following morning was a very pensive day. Alex awoke first and looked over at his boyfriend, who was still sleeping quite soundly. He looked him over and watched the exposed tanned chest rise and fall. Mason’s newly-shortened medium-length blond hair was strewn about his chiseled face; masking its true beauty. Alex traced the chiseled jaw line with his fingers; trying not to disturb his blissful slumber. He could feel Mason’s whiskers that had grown overnight. They were a healthy length already; which was a testament as to why he had to shave daily. Alex had watched him perform his morning ritual. It was quite hypnotic actually; watching Mason’s shaving regime. He would start out by lathering his face with rich, thick shaving foam. He used the same brand his father had used most of his life. A traditionalist he was. He honored deeply the traditions of his family; despite their dismay at his being a homosexual. Mason had always hoped that by honoring his family’s ways it would grant him their acceptance at last. Alex admired that about his boyfriend. In fact, he was growing to admire pretty much everything about his beau. Alex had not thought he’d ever do as well with finding a suitable partner as he had. Everything was working out alright. There were some challenges of course, but there were always rough spots in every relationship. Alex had spent an inordinate amount of time researching what made a strong pairing between two males. He’d found a host of sites; some of which were pornographic in nature and had many pictures. Alex was shocked at first, but as he delved more into his research efforts; he found much more constructive advice and articles. He’d even gone so far as to print them out and place them in a file. Alex had to admit that even he was a supreme nerd sometimes; he went overboard with the anal-retentiveness. That was probably why he was scared to death to do sex anally; that it might rupture or something.

Alex stopped daydreaming and focused on Mason’s handsome face once again. The man stirred a bit; his blue eyes visible for only a split second. Alex held his breath; he didn’t want to be discovered staring at him. Mason shut his eyes as quickly as they’d opened, rolled over on his side, and went back to sleep. Alex smiled and enjoyed the view of Mason’s strong, tan backside; which was exposed down to about mid-waist level. Alex was extremely tempted to run his fingers down the inviting site; yet restrained. He didn’t want to wake him; he wanted Mason to stay with him as long as he possibly could. Today they’d be separated again for who knows how long; Alex didn’t want to think about such things.

Later that day proved to be far more difficult. The day had been very nice; which made the departure all that more bittersweet. They had picnicked in Hyde Park again. Mason had bought him a bouquet of his favorite flowers from a street vendor; red tulips. Alex sniffed them almost incessantly; he wanted to equate their sweet aroma to what he felt for the wonderful man at his side. They sat down together on the bench near the lake.

“I’ll miss you so much, Mason. I don’t think you know how much.”

“I do know. I really do. Look, I know you’re reluctant to be with me that way, and I think I’ve been pretty damn patient so far, haven’t I?”

Alex nodded. “Yes, you have. Maybe once we’re back home. I’d like to get together then.”

Mason wet his lips. “I think we’d better wait until we’re both back home. I’ll come to where you live. Meet your family maybe.”

Alex’s eyes grew wide with panic. “My family? No way! They don’t accept me, how the hell can they take you in too? Try bringing me home to your mother and see how your family reacts.”

Mason frowned. “I guess I didn’t think about that. We’d need to find a neutral site.”

“Switzerland isn’t too far from here.” Alex mused.

“Smartass, I meant at home in the good ‘ol USA! We’ll figure something out. For now though, I think I’d better get to the hotel and pack. My flight leaves in two hours.”

Alex’s eyes widened. “Two hours? Let’s get a move on! You gotta get through customs and security, let’s move it!”

They scurried back to the hotel and hurriedly packed the remainder of Mason’s things. They dashed down the stairwell to the car and took off towards Heathrow.

Mason rushed to the curbside check-in, and left a sizeable tip. He had to practically run to the gate! Alex tried to keep pace, but fell behind for a few moments, and lost Mason in the crowd.

“Mason! Mason, where are you?” He cried out.

“Over here! Come on, I gotta bolt!” they joined hands and took off down the concourse. Finally, Gate 23 appeared. A breathless Mason handed the attendant his ticket and she began to usher him onto the plane.

“Wait. I must say good-bye.” Mason looked over his shoulder and saw Alex with his arms held out wide. They embraced emphatically and kissed three times. The young student held back his emotions and put on a brave face. Mason appeared to do the same. Alex could feel tension in his boyfriend’s muscular body. His own body was trembling; he felt almost nauseous. He didn’t want to say goodbye; but it was time to let go.

Mason backed away. “I have to go now. I’ll call you as soon as I’m back. I promise!”

“Be safe, please!”

“I will, I promise. Bye, Alex!”

“Bye, Mason.”

The businessman boarded the plane and waved farewell one last time. Alex stayed and watched until the plan had taxied, taken off, and finally flew out of view.

“I love you, Mason.”

Another month passed. It was coming near the end of Alex’s time in London with a scant four weeks left to go. His class would be wrapping up soon and any touristy places he wanted to visit, he put at the top of his priority list. This held his attention for the daytime hours. The nighttime was another matter entirely. All that consumed

his thoughts during the long, dark hours was Mason being in his arms, either kissing him or sleeping. He’d often find himself awakening with a doused pair of underwear on; his thoughts had become so realistic. Almost every night a dream taunted his subconscious of having the blond man in his midst. This was becoming a bit much. He would get up countless times a night to check his email and cell phone to see if there was any communication from his beloved at all. Alex wondered if he had stepped into the curious world of obsession. He certainly howed all the symptoms. Even his wallpaper on his laptop pc was a large photo of Mason that he kept on his screen constantly. Alex would stare at it endlessly and then at his cell phone; waiting for any communication at all. Had he stepped into this dark realm? What were his true feelings? Was it all just lust or puppy love? Was it true or only perceived feelings that he was experiencing? Did he really think they could keep up this long-distance relationship? Don’t those always fail? According to his thorough research; yes, they usually do. He was determined for it to not end; but to continue well into his lifetime. He knew it was his first relationship and that he should be careful; but everything about Mason intoxicated him. His appearance, his smell, his body, his kisses, even his voice, left him begging for more. Alex watched the calendar and counted the days religiously. The day that Mason was to arrive he awoke very early. He showered, dressed, and ate. He sat on the edge of his seat in the living area downstairs; his cell phone never out of reach.

The phone rang; catching Alex off guard. He yelped as he pushed the proper button to receive the call; ignoring what number it even was.

“Mas?”

“Hello, Alex! How are you?”

Alex smiled widely. “I’m wonderful! Ready to come to the house?”

There was a long pause.

Mason finally spoke again. “Uh, Alex, I hate to tell you this. The company pulled my trip off of their itinerary; the party I was meeting was called off.”

Alex almost dropped the phone. He tried to speak, but his voice temporarily abandoned him. Mason spoke again. “I’m so sorry, hon, if it were up to me I’d be right there at this moment kissing you like mad!”

Alex found his voice again and gathered his emotions. He fought tears and clenched his free hand into a fist and leapt from the sofa in an outrage. “This sucks! This really does. I’ve been expecting you! I’ve been on pins and needles all week, awaiting your arrival. They’re not just screwing with you, it’s me too! I hate your damn company!”

“Alex, calm down! I’m sorry! What would you have me do? Come over anyway? Listen, I can’t simply jet off to London on a moment’s notice! It’s damn expensive and the company wouldn’t pay for it! Besides, I have responsibilities here. I don’t have mom and dad to help me with my finances; I’m a grown man!”

Alex nearly flung the phone across the room. He put the phone down for a moment and held his fist to his mouth, fighting an angry scream. After a long moment, he finally got a hold of himself again and picked up the phone. “Fine, whatever, you’re right. Why would I expect you to just drop everything to come and see me? I’m only some stupid kid you met in a bar and fucked his brains out…” Alex ended with a growl.

Mason sighed. “You know that isn’t why. If I could get there I would, but it’s out of my hands! I’m sorry, Alex!”

Alex felt his face grow hotter both from the phone’s heat and his own temper. Light tears finally battled their way through his brown eyes. “Maybe you need to get used to your hands! We need to just take this as a break. This long-distance thing is not going to work out.”

Mason fell silent for a moment.

Alex held his breath in the tense moment. He reseated himself on the very edge of the sofa.

“Alex…”

“What?”

“I don’t want to stop seeing you. If you do, then it’s your decision, not mine. I care for you and want to be with you.”

“Then get your fuckin ass over here!”

“I can’t! I just told you I can’t! Will you listen to me? Even if I could borrow the money somehow; I couldn’t just take off from work without any notice. That is a very long plane ride from here. Let’s be reasonable, Alex. lease.”

Alex cleared his face and took a few deep breaths. His logical side was trying to take over again. He had to analyze everything. It was beginning to sink in with every moment that passed. Finally, after a very long minute-and-a-half pause; Alex spoke again. “Mas?”

“Yes?”

“I leave here in four weeks.”

“I know. I think we’ll have better luck once you’re home.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry. Dammit, I hate this whole situation, but I have to agree with you. We’ll wait until we’re home. Shit, you sure you still want to date someone so young and naïve?”

“Relax. You’ll survive. You’re a tough lil Kansas man. Bye for now, Alex.”

“Bye, Mason.” Alex hung up. “Dammit, Mason, I love you so much. Why can’t either one of us say it? Unless…stop. Stop thinking that way!” Alex shook his head and leaned back on the chair.

The door opened, it was Paolo. Alex dried off his face quickly and turned on the television.

“Alex.”

“Paolo.” The two said coldly to each other.

“Thought your boyfriend was coming into town.”

Alex shot his roommate a look, and replied. “His trip got cancelled at the last minute. I won’t see him again until we get home.”

“Oh, introducing him to mommy and daddy, are we? They don’t even know that you’re gay! How are they gonna handle that?”

Alex scowled and leered at his friend. “Look, pal. My parents are none of your business. Come to think of it, none of this is your business, so back off!” He pushed Paolo’s shoulder. The Spaniard didn’t push back.

“You naïve kid, I bet you’re gonna hole up in your room now for the rest of the trip, just you and your hand!”

“You shut the fuck up! I won’t be alone like you!” Alex screamed. He pushed Paolo again and bolted past him to his room upstairs.

The final four weeks were spent studying and being a homebody. Alex’s roommate Jake left a week early. He’d found a nice Swedish girl that he wanted to pursue further. Paolo, whom hadn’t spoken to him in weeks, finally broke down and suggested a truce. They chatted over dinner.

“Dude, we gotta end this. I’m sorry I yelled at you, Alex. I had no right.”

“Hey, you had every right! I was raving on and on about him and here you are, alone. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”

Paolo shrugged. “That’s cool. At least you got some time alone. Has he called you?”

“Oh yeah, every other day, I can’t wait to see him again. That way I can keep an eye on him at home. I’m gonna ask him to move in with me!”

Paolo nearly dropped his fork and slapped his hand on his forehead. “You made that up, right? Are you insane?”

Alex scowled. “Yeah, why not? Seize the day! I’m in love with that dude! I know he is with me.”

“Oh really, has he ever told you that?”

Alex averted his eyes and cleared his throat. “Uh, well no, not exactly.”

“You don’t even know? How can you plan a future if you have no idea how he feels about you?”

“Hey, guys aren’t the best at letting their feelings be known! Don’t you know that?”

Paolo shook his head. “Don’t be an ass again! I know how men are, you bet I do! I know my cousin is dying from AIDS from one of those men! I have a good friend that got mixed up with the wrong guy and did all kinds of drugs. He overdosed on one of their ‘dates’. Yeah, I know how guys are. Guys are horrible!”

“Is that why you never have a date? You stay away from all men?” Alex asked wryly.

“Maybe.”

Alex laughed. “Well, I’m sure there’s a nice place in the monastery for you. The rest of us will be out there wondering whatever happened to the soccer player.”

Paolo clenched his fists and stood up, towering over the table. “Is that all I am to you, the soccer player? Maybe the chef too? Wow, you have a low opinion of people, don’t you? You love the ones who don’t love you and…”

Alex suddenly looked up and swore he saw Paolo’s eyes water. He leaned forward. “And what?”

Paolo held up his hands in a “time-out” symbol and leaned over the table. He reached for his napkin and wiped off his mouth. He shoved his chair under the table violently, shaking the table. “You know what? Never mind. I’ve said too much. I hope you end up happy while you can. You think you know everything. Later, Alex.” He bolted up to his room.

Alex got up quickly and ran to the stairs. “Paolo get back down here! Paolo!” He heard the door slam shut. He threw his napkin on the floor and kicked the staircase. “Dammit. Fine! Be that way!”

Paolo left early the next day without a word or a note. Alex was alone. He intended to take full advantage of it. He played his music as loudly as he wanted and watched whatever TV shows he’d missed. All of his photos had been developed; so he spent a good week sorting them out on the floor so they would be in perfect order for his scrapbook. Every photo of Mason brought a silent moment. He would pick up and kiss the photo; wishing vehemently he was there.

The last day finally arrived. Alex finished his packing silently and quickly as he waited for his cab to arrive at 11 am. He took one last look around the rooming house and out the windows. He could almost see the street that led him to the Houndstooth that fateful night. He’d have so many memories, especially of his time with Mason. The cab arrived right on schedule. Alex toted his loaded luggage outside and rode away with the driver.