Carter's Duty - 5. Chapter 5

Will found himself out on the balcony with Rafik and Jeff while Peter and the girls discussed the bridal arrangements. Andrew and Jared had made a run to the beer store which left the three men who remained in an uncomfortable silence as they stared across the road at the retirement home that sat opposite Brody's house. Both Will and Rafik realized what was to come. The age-old ritual that men performed just before one of them got married. It was considered the ultimate sacrifice of a friend, to be named best man.

Jeff was unusually shy as he hesitated to ask. Normally he would have just come right out and made the offer like he had the first time he had shortly after Lisa had accepted the engagement. Both of his friends had already agreed to act as witnesses, but that had been more from courtesy than from actual commitment. When Jeff asked again things were different; they would actually have to go through with it. They would have to stand witness to the union.

Though, Will thought with trepidation, at least he wouldn't get stuck in a tangerine bridesmaids dress...

"I need you guys to stand for me..." he managed after a short pause. It was a simple request, short and direct. Like Jeff was himself, to the point.

Will had found himself nodding almost before he had known what he had been doing. It was an automatic response that committed him to help plan the event. He wanted to second-guess his decision immediately, but it was too late to back out of it now. He was committed, with all the responsibility that went along with it. What had he just agreed to, piling more on to his already overloaded plate.

Jeff grinned happily as he clapped Will about the shoulder and he turned to Rafik.

Will immediately picked up on Rafik's unease, and he felt his heart sink for Jeff. Rafik was many things, but considerate wasn't one of them.

"I can't, man," he shook his head and extended his hands helplessly, "I've got a deadline this week. I'll be lucky to get Wednesday off at all. Look, I'm sorry."

It was a feeble excuse at best and it utterly crushed Jeff. A few simple words had robbed him of his earlier happiness. His plans for the perfect day that he had dreamt of ever since he'd first met Lisa would have to be rethought because of one of his friends utter selfishness.

Jeff didn't say a word as he wandered back into the house, his shoulders sagged and his head bent.
Will watched him leave and rounded on Rafik. His temper flaring, he was overloaded. Swamped with work, losing his overtime by being switched to salary from hourly. A massive pay cut, extra hours being rammed down his throat.. and yet he'd still agreed. That's what friends did, Jeff had asked, Will answered... and that utter prick had the gall, the nerve to beg off?

He knew Rafik well; they had known each other since school, and out of all of them, Will was the only one who knew Rafik well enough to understand him. Even then only Lisa seemed to know him better, but that was because of an abortive relationship that had gone horribly wrong. And their friendship, however strained, still allowed Will an edge when it came to figuring out Rafik's motives.

"You upset him." Will stated the obvious; it was the best way to start a conversation with Rafik. He seethed, he wanted to grab the ungrateful ass and shake him. You don't crush a person like that.

"I can't help it," Rafik had gone back to leaning over the balcony as he took the time to light a cigarette. Will bristled. Smoking. That was always a bad sign; Farah detested his smoking habit. She had imposed a rigid rule that he quit shortly after the wedding, and for him to risk taking a smoke with her in the house was a good sign of how upset he was.

Rafik always kept a pack of cigarettes at Will's. He used Will as an excuse to get together at the house to watch a hockey game and smoke. Will was patient with it, to a point, he tolerated the intrusion but refused to join their habit. Part of him found it simply humorous that his home was a refuge, the last outpost of testosterone where his friends could find safe haven from the storm of estrogen in their lives. Ironic considering it was the home of two gay man and an erstwhile bachelor supreme.

Rafik seemed to believe that as long as he didn't own a packet of cigarettes and simply "borrowed" from Jared, he didn't smoke. The fact that he paid for the cigarettes and lit up more frequently than Jared did was beside the point. He flatly denied being a smoker.

"So work is more important than your best friend's wedding?" Will asked as he joined him at the rail.

Rafik seemed to grow more uncomfortable, as if he was choosing how much to say and finally he caved. "I'm invoking the roommate clause."

The roommate clause was an age-old bond of trust that went back to cramped University dormrooms that he had shared with Jeff. Kings College, pokey rooms, out dated cinderblock walls, and exactly two feet separating their beds. There were no secrets, no lies, just trust and Kraft dinners, and of the mistakes that came with being out in the world for the first time. It was a mutual promise that whatever was discussed or seen between roommates stayed between roommates and was usually reserved for those sacred conversations, the one that could land a roommate in serious trouble. Will had invoked it a few times over the years, usually when he confided a secret about Andrew.

"We've never been roommates," Will reminded as he leaned on the balcony, "but I can make an exception this once, what's on your mind?"

"I'm serious, man," Rafik stressed as he took another drag on his cigarette; he was uncharacteristically anxious for the narcissist he was. Usually Rafik was oblivious to what others thought of him.

"Alright," Will said as he grew more serious. He watched as Jared and Andrew rounded the top of the street on their return trip; they carried a two-four between them and laughed at something or other. Will looked over at Rafik and waited.

"I don't think they're in love," he admitted slowly. "Not enough to get married, I don't want to be a part of it."
Will was incredulous; Rafik could be highly hypocritical at times and opinionated about it as well. When he chose to be stubborn on an issue he often refused to be moved even after the facts his opinion had been based upon had been disproved. He tried to cover it by choosing his stances carefully, but when he refused to take part in a marriage simply because he believed there was no love involved... He obviously didn't spend enough time in front of the mirror.

Will decided not to call him on that fact, it would be counter-productive, instead he decided to probe the conversation, "Alright, I suppose I now have to ask you why you think that?"

"She doesn't love him," Rafik said as he flicked the ash off of the balcony and onto the driveway below. Will ignored the fact that the ash fell on his Jeep. Rafik was distracted after all. Not that it mattered; Rafik often didn't care about the effects his actions had on other people.

"Marriage is about love," he continued after a moment as if lecturing from a position of knowledge. "And from the way Lisa complains about him...She hates his temper," he explained. "She always talks shit about him, there is always something she wants to leave him over, and now they're getting married? It's hypocritical." He angrily flicked the butt of his cigarette out into the street and reached for another one.

Again Will bit back a sharp retort, he had to be diplomatic. "Well," he said after a moments thought, "I'm going to support them whatever they choose to do."

Rafik rolled his eyes in exasperation, "I'll be at the wedding," he lit his second cigarette in an awkward way, "I just can't witness for it. It would be wrong to do it when I don't believe they should be doing it in the first place."

"Fair, I suppose." Will said after a moment. There was subtext there, and Will was again reminded of all the times Rafik had tried to ask Lisa out. Of all the endless schemes and almost... slimey innuendos. The kind of thing that gave Lisa the ick. Rafik didn't believe they were in love, because no one was allowed to actually love Lisa but him. It was tedious, Rafik twisted something in Will that repulsed him. There was selfish, but this... it was twisted and wrong. To lie and stand before God and say he believed in a marriage when he obviously didn't would be too much for Rafik.

For the millionth time, Will wondered why Rafik and Farah were there. He made a pledge to himself to distance himself from their toxicity in future. Disentangle himself and hopfully the others from a festering pair of cancerous individuals before they spread their poison.

As for God, Will had no such compunction. He had his own agreement with the Almighty. It was an agreement to disagree on virtually everything, but it was a workable relationship. God agreed to throw obstacles into the road of life and Will chose to stick his finger up at religion in return. It was a mutual understanding that since Will was damned to hell anyway he could curse God as much as he wanted to along the way.

"Hey, buddy!" Jared called up to Will as he and Andrew turned into the driveway.

The two were old friends; they had been teammates back on the high school hockey team. That friendship only seemed to grow stronger over time. They were both Sen's fans, and with their team set to win the Stanley Cup finals that year, they were almost inseparable. Will supposed he could have been jealous that he didn't share a different connection to Andrew, a common interest would have gone a long way to ease the relationship tension between them. But Will couldn't get his head around the great Canadian game.

Sure he had a healthy foreigner's interest in the sport. Which was to say he didn't understand it at all. Even after eight years of being in the country, he still couldn't tell one play from another, or even grasp the basic concepts of how it was played. He wondered at Andrew, he was a complication indeed. No one else had ever managed to make him sit down to experience a hockey game. Will couldn't get through a single period without boredom, but he still felt as though he should try.

He glanced back at Rafik; a truly unhappy individual lay beneath the man's exterior. A man who, despite all the material things he had in his life, couldn't find a shred of peace. Not because he deserved it, but he ignored it completely when it was presented to him. He was a creature designed to work. In a loveless marriage set to have children he didn't particularly want. He hid behind material wealth with the urge to escape but steadfastly refusing to run.

And for once Will didn't envy the ideal job or the nice car. Sure the money would be good, and the car was nice. But there was something soulless in Rafik, unfulfilled. Will balked at the thought, was he becoming like that? His own job was a nightmare, and he was exhausted all the time. But surely there was more than work, maybe he could find some kind of balance. Maybe if he could stand up for himself, he'd avoid the fate that Rafik embraced.

"We should go back inside." Will commented.

"Sure," Rafik replied as he tossed his half finished cigarette aside and popped a super mint into his mouth, as if Farah were that stupid. He followed Will back to the party.